Husband said he didn’t like the recipe I cooked

[Anonymous]

He agreed with you that it was bland? I hate when my husband agrees with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have kids? Cause lord, if THAT hurt your feelings just wait until your kid gets old enough to give their feedback!

My kids aren’t allowed to critique my food. I just don’t want to hear it. They don’t have to eat it but if they can’t critique it.

Same. That goes for his hands too. You can no thank you. You can say why you liked something. You can also pass on a meal ( after at least trying it once) for a sandwich. But if you don't cook you can't critique.

Wait they're not allowed to say, this was too bland for me? Thanks for making it but I think we should try with more spices next time (or less)? Or even just: I don't like eating this? Do they not get any say in their food?

I’m the first PP whose kids aren’t allowed to critique my food. My kids can eat literally whatever they want. They just aren’t allowed to give me tips on what I should do better next time. I used to allow it and then it just got annoying. Guess what, if I didn’t do a great job with the food or if I used a bad recipe, I know if. No need for anybody to drive the point home.

And when others, including DH and my kids, cook for me, I don’t critique it either. unless they ask for feedback.

[Anonymous]

Yes… and?
Can you not take criticism or is he habitually overcritical?

DH and I routinely critique each other’s dishes. It’s normal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree this was fine. My husband has more than once referred to something I’ve made as disgusting slop (once was beef stroganoff and another was like a chicken in a cream sauce, so apparently he doesn’t like meat in a cream sauce)—but he’s often an a-hole. Your husband sounds fine, although he probably could have been a little more diplomatic. I’ve tried to reach the kids diplomatic ways to say that they’d prefer something a different way. My son just dumps hot spice on anything he thinks is too bland but he recognizes that his sister can’t tolerate his preferred level of heat.

Holy cow. Now granted, my husband was (is) a Marine, so can and will eat anything...but if he ever called anything I made disgusting slop, he'd be wearing it.

[Anonymous]

Tone and context matter a lot. Does he normally express appreciate for your cooking efforts? Does he praise when he likes something in particular? Or is it just critcism? My FIL never said anything about a meal unless it was criticism. I guess you were just supposed to assume it was satisfactory unless instructed otherwise -- like "needs more salt" or "too much sauce". Like whoever cooked it was an underling who needed instruction on how to serve him. That's not good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He forgot to do the positivity sandwich:

Positive: I think it's wonderful that you're trying to stretch our palettes by trying out a new cookbook.

Negative: It was good, but maybe we can add some more spices next time?

Positive: Thank you for taking so much time and effort to make delicious meals. I really know how much you love me through your cooking.

Just be honest, and teach him about the sandwich. He'll do better next time.

+ 1

Excellent advice here! 👍🏼

[Anonymous]

So, so glad I live in a house where people are allowed to have and express their own opinions about food. Good lord.

[Anonymous]

My ex was overly critical. Many good meals he would criticize. Finally I told him he was free to make dinner every night, otherwise never complain when someone has made your meal.

[Anonymous]

What cookbook was it, OP?

[Anonymous]

FFS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If he spit the food out, yelled, "this is terrible" and then fed it to the dog...Yes, be offended.

If he refuses to finish and goes and buys a McDonald's hamburger...Yes, be offended.

If he ate the meal, and kindly said, the lamb needs more seasoning/next time use more salt/this is a little bland...No, don't be offended.

Even worse, she *asked* him what he thought, and he responded. Good grief.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He forgot to do the positivity sandwich:

Positive: I think it's wonderful that you're trying to stretch our palettes by trying out a new cookbook.

Negative: It was good, but maybe we can add some more spices next time?

Positive: Thank you for taking so much time and effort to make delicious meals. I really know how much you love me through your cooking.

Just be honest, and teach him about the sandwich. He'll do better next time.

+ 1

Excellent advice here! 👍🏼

For an unsolicited comment, I suppose, though it's distressing that so many people are so fragile that they need one mild criticism surrounded by all that fluff.

Here, though, OP asked her husband what he thought of the meatballs. He responded. There no need for all the extras when he's just responding. And she agreed with him! How is OP's reaction to this not, "Yeah, I thought so too?"

[Anonymous]

I'd be annoyed if he pretended to like it.

I'm guessing there is an under current of you feeling unappreciated. Dh would have said it was bland, but also thanked me for cooking dinner. Dh and I both cook and always thank the other. Once, when DS was little, he asked why we say thank you when it's something expected, like dinner. Dh told him that nothing is ever expected and when someone takes time to do something for you, you show appreciation.

So I would not care that he said it was bland. But dh still would have thanked me for making it. We all have hits and misses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He forgot to do the positivity sandwich:

Positive: I think it's wonderful that you're trying to stretch our palettes by trying out a new cookbook.

Negative: It was good, but maybe we can add some more spices next time?

Positive: Thank you for taking so much time and effort to make delicious meals. I really know how much you love me through your cooking.

Just be honest, and teach him about the sandwich. He'll do better next time.

+ 1

Excellent advice here! 👍🏼

For an unsolicited comment, I suppose, though it's distressing that so many people are so fragile that they need one mild criticism surrounded by all that fluff.

Here, though, OP asked her husband what he thought of the meatballs. He responded. There no need for all the extras when he's just responding. And she agreed with him! How is OP's reaction to this not, "Yeah, I thought so too?"

Some people really don't respond well to "criticism" (though I don't think that's what DH did). My mom was like that.she could make something that she didn't like how it turned out but would be upset if any of us didn't like it.

[Anonymous]

Wow, people are way too sensitive. Sorry he didn’t like your meal, OP but if you can’t be honest with your spouse and vice versa that’s a problem.