Why do kids who can afford to go away for college stay close to home and even room with their high

[Anonymous]

This question is really not a good look, OP.

There could be lots of reasons.
- want to stay close to home but want to branch out a little bit
- need to help at home
- have a medical or social issue where being close to home is easier or feels safer
- didn't get in anywhere else
- the school is desirable to them (you included Howard on your list -- really??? You can't imagine why someone wouldn't want to go to HOWARD and live there? If that's true, you need to expand your circle.)
- they're sticking close to home for a bf/gf
- their parent or another adult in their life gets a tuition discount or remission
- they got the most financial aid there
- they just...want to

Really. The fact that you can't see these reasons, or imagine that others make different choices than you and your kids, is dumb. I hate to be that simple about it, but it's dumb.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they just want to and are afraid they will miss family

[Anonymous]

Teens stick somewhat close to home because of combo of familiarity, that's where same year and older peers go, that's where their counselor at school nudges them to apply, it's where their parents went...

Most teens don't have the confidence to go to a far away college they don't know anyone at.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teens stick somewhat close to home because of combo of familiarity, that's where same year and older peers go, that's where their counselor at school nudges them to apply, it's where their parents went...

Most teens don't have the confidence to go to a far away college they don't know anyone at.

I'd add most parents don't want their kids far away, either. Goes both ways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I went a thousand miles from home because my parents were having an awful divorce. You would think I made a superior choice.

A year later, I’d transferred back to a school 20 miles from my front door because it was a better fit (and just as elite)

Was I a failure?

Sounds like you struggled to make friends or meet a boy, so you transferred to where your high school friends were. Such transfers happen a lot, especially if parents stress about $.

Huh? Not at all. The first school is quite good, but wasn’t a good fit for me. Only one of my high school friends got in where I landed -ivy - and there were no boys involved. And we had plenty of money. I’d just matured enough to be Physically near my parents without getting drawn in to their drama.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I went a thousand miles from home because my parents were having an awful divorce. You would think I made a superior choice.

A year later, I’d transferred back to a school 20 miles from my front door because it was a better fit (and just as elite)

Was I a failure?

Sounds like you struggled to make friends or meet a boy, so you transferred to where your high school friends were. Such transfers happen a lot, especially if parents stress about $.

Huh? Not at all. The first school is quite good, but wasn’t a good fit for me. Only one of my high school friends got in where I landed -ivy - and there were no boys involved. And we had plenty of money. I’d just matured enough to be Physically near my parents without getting drawn in to their drama.

So you made no friends or you felt dumb around the aggressive Ivy gunners?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I went a thousand miles from home because my parents were having an awful divorce. You would think I made a superior choice.

A year later, I’d transferred back to a school 20 miles from my front door because it was a better fit (and just as elite)

Was I a failure?

Sounds like you struggled to make friends or meet a boy, so you transferred to where your high school friends were. Such transfers happen a lot, especially if parents stress about $.

Huh? Not at all. The first school is quite good, but wasn’t a good fit for me. Only one of my high school friends got in where I landed -ivy - and there were no boys involved. And we had plenty of money. I’d just matured enough to be Physically near my parents without getting drawn in to their drama.

So you made no friends or you felt dumb around the aggressive Ivy gunners?

What is wrong with you? PP responded more gently than necessary to your last outburst and you respond with this? I think you need to log off and do some introspection.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I went a thousand miles from home because my parents were having an awful divorce. You would think I made a superior choice.

A year later, I’d transferred back to a school 20 miles from my front door because it was a better fit (and just as elite)

Was I a failure?

Sounds like you struggled to make friends or meet a boy, so you transferred to where your high school friends were. Such transfers happen a lot, especially if parents stress about $.

Huh? Not at all. The first school is quite good, but wasn’t a good fit for me. Only one of my high school friends got in where I landed -ivy - and there were no boys involved. And we had plenty of money. I’d just matured enough to be Physically near my parents without getting drawn in to their drama.

So you made no friends or you felt dumb around the aggressive Ivy gunners?

What is wrong with you? PP responded more gently than necessary to your last outburst and you respond with this? I think you need to log off and do some introspection.

+1

The abusive pp has issues. Glad i do not know such a person irl.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I went a thousand miles from home because my parents were having an awful divorce. You would think I made a superior choice.

A year later, I’d transferred back to a school 20 miles from my front door because it was a better fit (and just as elite)

Was I a failure?

Sounds like you struggled to make friends or meet a boy, so you transferred to where your high school friends were. Such transfers happen a lot, especially if parents stress about $.

Huh? Not at all. The first school is quite good, but wasn’t a good fit for me. Only one of my high school friends got in where I landed -ivy - and there were no boys involved. And we had plenty of money. I’d just matured enough to be Physically near my parents without getting drawn in to their drama.

OP here. These posts are not me!!! Thanks for your insights

[Anonymous]

DC is aiming for umd.

Great dept for the major he wants.
Close to home for any support needed.
Will not miss out any family event
Staying in dorm allows him freedom and responsibility
Can continue to see his health providers
Internships will be easier.
Money saved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I went a thousand miles from home because my parents were having an awful divorce. You would think I made a superior choice.

A year later, I’d transferred back to a school 20 miles from my front door because it was a better fit (and just as elite)

Was I a failure?

Sounds like you struggled to make friends or meet a boy, so you transferred to where your high school friends were. Such transfers happen a lot, especially if parents stress about $.

Huh? Not at all. The first school is quite good, but wasn’t a good fit for me. Only one of my high school friends got in where I landed -ivy - and there were no boys involved. And we had plenty of money. I’d just matured enough to be Physically near my parents without getting drawn in to their drama.

So you made no friends or you felt dumb around the aggressive Ivy gunners?

I transferred TO the ivy. And had a perfectly good college experience.

Why are you so nasty?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I went a thousand miles from home because my parents were having an awful divorce. You would think I made a superior choice.

A year later, I’d transferred back to a school 20 miles from my front door because it was a better fit (and just as elite)

Was I a failure?

Sounds like you struggled to make friends or meet a boy, so you transferred to where your high school friends were. Such transfers happen a lot, especially if parents stress about $.

Huh? Not at all. The first school is quite good, but wasn’t a good fit for me. Only one of my high school friends got in where I landed -ivy - and there were no boys involved. And we had plenty of money. I’d just matured enough to be Physically near my parents without getting drawn in to their drama.

So you made no friends or you felt dumb around the aggressive Ivy gunners?

What is wrong with you? PP responded more gently than necessary to your last outburst and you respond with this? I think you need to log off and do some introspection.

+1

The abusive pp has issues. Glad i do not know such a person irl.

Thanks for the kind responses (I'm the one with the divorced parents who went to college close to home).

[Anonymous]

For us the local university was plan B, and living on campus was the consolation prize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are so many college opportunities near DC. Just within the metro area we have some of the best schools in the country (JHU, Georgetown), a top ranked public (UMD), and some great LAC options. If you open it up to three hours away which is a pretty normal distance from home for most kids in the rest of the country (even ones going to their state school), you have hundreds of options including two ivies. We happen to live in the heart of higher education. I think a lot of kids find schools they love nearby without even considering location.

What are the great LAC options? My DS would like to be nearby but there don’t seem to be any small liberal arts colleges and that is what he wants.

Within a few hours Swarthmore, Haverford and then down several notches there’s Goucher, McDaniel, Roanoke

Plus St. John's, St. Mary's, Washington College, Randolph-Macon, Gettysburg, Elizabethtown, and F&M.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are so many college opportunities near DC. Just within the metro area we have some of the best schools in the country (JHU, Georgetown), a top ranked public (UMD), and some great LAC options. If you open it up to three hours away which is a pretty normal distance from home for most kids in the rest of the country (even ones going to their state school), you have hundreds of options including two ivies. We happen to live in the heart of higher education. I think a lot of kids find schools they love nearby without even considering location.

What are the great LAC options? My DS would like to be nearby but there don’t seem to be any small liberal arts colleges and that is what he wants.

Within a few hours Swarthmore, Haverford and then down several notches there’s Goucher, McDaniel, Roanoke

Plus St. John's, St. Mary's, Washington College, Randolph-Macon, Gettysburg, Elizabethtown, and F&M.

The sentence claimed they were in the DC metro area though. Places like Swarthmore and F&M are definitely not and some of these others are a stretch.