What to do with a kid who is good at a number of sports & school only allows kid 1 sport per season

[Anonymous]

We refuse to get on this ridiculous bandwagon where a kid has to "specialize" by middle school. My big, strapping, athletic boy plays a number of sports well and has fun at them. I suppose eventually he may decide to play one more seriously and go out for the high school team or whatever. That would be fine with us, as long as he keeps his grades up and continues to live a well-balanced life. Several of his friend opted for travel soccer, and they seem miserable and stressed, plus the whole family spends every weekend driving to some God-forsaken suburb. Other friends (usually driven by the parents) are spending tons of time and money on coaching and clinics for sports at which they will never really excel. The reality is, very few kids are college caliber players, and I'd rather my child play a number of sports well, stay healthy and happy, and I'm sure he'll be just fine.

[Anonymous]

22:33 You're laying this on really thick. You don't know any happy travel soccer players? I can introduce you to a large group of them. It's silly to diss travel soccer to the degree that you do because it was not the path you or your son chose. I respect your choice. Please respect mine.

[Anonymous]

I am a HS coach in the area (I am not going to say which school). I have found over the past few years an interesting trend in college recruiting. Many college coaches even the big D1 schools like to see kids competive in multiple sports. They like the competitive push from multiple seasons not just the training in the off seasons.

The thought process seems to be "you specialize in sport A and are this good how much better can we really make you" versus "you are this good at sport A and you have not specialized yet, we can make you better."


Just a tohught from what I have been seeing

[Anonymous]

sorry for the mispelling above

[Anonymous]

16:49 Thanks. Many travel soccer players I know, including my son, like to play at least one other sport as much as they can. (My son does school basketball and track.) So you can make one your main sport but play others. I know girls who do the same. Interesting trend ...

[Anonymous]

I want my kids to enjoy moving their bodies and to learn the lessons that come from team sports (i.e. sportsmanship, coping with losing & with not being the best, being gracious, etc). But I'm pretty sure they're not pro-caliber athletes. One of the reasons I chose private school is because we can leave the athletics to the school teams - starting at a far younger age than in the public schools - instead of spending all of our weekends and evenings doing athletics. We're doing some competitive leagues now, but my fervent hope is that we can ditch those in favor of the school teams once the kids are at school team age!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:15:19 That's if your goal is a soccer scholarship. That's very ROI-minded. Mine, and my child's, is not. He simply loves the game and wants to play as long as he can. That said, soccer can be a hook at D-2 and D-3 schools. But that is not our objective and we did not know that going in at age 9. Soccer, besides fulfillment, gives my son structure, discipline, a community of friends outside of school and amazing cultural experiences because his two coaches have been foreign. Also when he travels internationally on vacation, he's had bonding experiences playing or watching soccer in Europe and Latin America. Finally, every player on his travel team plays another sport at school and other travel players we know do, too. Many take music lessons as well. (Not my son, alas.) I wish people would stop perpetuating these myths!

I think you're responding to me. No, our goal is not a soccer scholarship. Our DCs got plenty out of travel soccer too, including learning sportsmanship, teamwork, and the rest, and we would have liked to stay with it. So you're basically jumping to conclusions about (a) our desire for a scholarship, and (b) our opinion of soccer per se.

My point is that the structure of the soccer leagues makes it impossible to do any other group activity seriously, like theater or chorus. Sure, it's possible to do music lessons, because you can set the lesson times yourself, to mesh with soccer team practices. But for any group activity, like chorus or theater, where you can't control the schedule, it's well-nigh impossible to make the schedules mesh.

Sure, for some kids, the stars align and the practice/game schedules make it possible to do another sport and/or activity. But for many kids, it's impossible. It depends on your team, and whether the coach or some group of parents decides to move the practice to a favored spot 45 minutes away (as happened to us), or a tournament is suddenly scheduled two states away, when you had already committed to some other activity.

For those wagging their fingers about people over-obligating themselves - you must be aware that tournaments pop up out of nowhere, when somebody calls your coach or the team's manager, and then it's too late for those of us who had other plans that weekend.

And that's a loss. I wish the people "running" travel soccer -- WAGS? NCSL? -- would come to their senses and structure things so that kids can have more balanced lives.

[Anonymous]

In fact, the problem of overscheduling is worse for the kid who's not going to get a scholarship, and is just in it for the fun and the team experience. Sure, the kid who's going to get the scholarship might want to specialize, and it might (although this is also debatable) be appropriate for a super-talented kid to specialize in one sport. But for the rest of the kids, saying "it's soccer and nothing else" means that at some point they have to choose between soccer and everything else. That's too bad.

[Anonymous]

17:10 15:19 here. I'm not sure if I was referring to you, it was a post noting that most players were not scholarship material and referencing some article or study that gave scholarships amounts as a percentage of fees played over the years.

I agree that it is a shame that travel soccer precludes other commitments. Though participating in a play also does that. At least some of the travel soccer bind (for lack of a better word) is due to the rise of club soccer. Back when soccer teams were run out of schools, at least high schools, players could coordinate better. Also, school soccer remains a one-season sport whereas, as you know, club soccer is a fall and spring undertaking with winter training, too.

The suggestion that NCSL and WAGS restructure is interesting. The problem there is whose schedule would they be aiming to accommodate, my child or yours or my child's best buddy? They surely don't have the same outside interests.

Also some teams run more smoothly than what you describe. Ours provides a list of tournaments and training schedules in June for the next 12 months.

[Anonymous]

That was my post about most kids not getting scholarships, further underscoring my gripe that all our non-scholarship kids are being locked into a single sport.

My suggestion wasn't that WAGS or NCLS restructure their schedules so that my kid can get to chorus at 7:00 on Mondays and Wednesdays. Please, you know that wasn't it, just like you know we aren't expecting a scholarship. Instead, they need to go to one, max two, seasons, so that kids can do other stuff in the winter or summer seasons.

[Anonymous]

It's OP again. I haven't posted for several days. I found all of the replies very interesting. I failed to mention my husband played in the pros...I won't say which sport because it would be obvious who he is. I also didn't mention that he is pressing DC to play his sport and DC wants to specialize in another sport.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Also some teams run more smoothly than what you describe. Ours provides a list of tournaments and training schedules in June for the next 12 months.

I'm willing to bet this is the exception. We've been involved in two travel teams, in two different clubs, and the suddenness of tournaments always caught us by surprise. OK, we'd get a few months' notice for some tournaments, and a few weeks' notice for other tournaments. But never 12 months!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
The suggestion that NCSL and WAGS restructure is interesting. The problem there is whose schedule would they be aiming to accommodate, my child or yours or my child's best buddy? They surely don't have the same outside interests.

Are you deliberately being dense? The suggestion was obviously for fewer seasons, as opposed to year-round soccer.

[Anonymous]

Never mind. I realized after posting that fewer seasons will never happen. Coaches get paid for each season, and they run WAGS and NCSL (yes, I was briefly manager of a travel team and got to attend various league meetings). Also, coaches like it when kids are in shape and in fine tune at the start of the season, so getting rid of the winter season or summer practices/tournaments would never happen.