Would you date/marry a vegan/vegetarian?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most vegetarians I’ve met are fat, so probably not.

This. Most are pretty chunky.

[Anonymous]

No. Who needs that pain in the a@@!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most vegetarians I’ve met are fat, so probably not.

This. Most are pretty chunky.

This is America, half the country is chunky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It didn't occur to me to consider people's eating habits as part of my vetting process for relationships. I guess if they were a strict vegan, we might not have gotten along because I eat/consume a lot of various animal products.

I'm vegetarian and wanted to make sure I wasn't marrying an absolute carnivore. I'm not high maintenance and can make do in restaurants, but if he was one of those guys who insisted that it isn't a meal unless there's a huge hunk of meat in it, we wouldn't be compatible.

+1. I didn't want to marry into a family like that, either. Thanksgiving is really not fun if you're around people who put meat into everything.

[Anonymous]

I have met plenty of high maintenance and picky eater omnivores. The worst high maintenance picky eater I know was like that as omnivore and she's like that as a vegetarian. These things are personality traits not a function of dietary preferences.

My college roommate was a religious vegetarian (Hindu) and she was one most of least picky, most adventurous eaters that I know. She was willing try different cuisines, different spices. She had no problem going to any restaurant and just figuring it out for herself. She had no problem with other people eating meat. She was always polite and respectful of other culinary traditions even when some foods were off-putting to her given her diet.

Being a picky eater and high maintenance about food, an absolute unequivocal deal breaker. But no, vegetarianism or vegan is not a deal breaker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m not sure. Honestly, food and cooking are such major parts in my life, and that includes enjoying foods of different cultures and being high maintenance about it would make it far less enjoyable and even rude.

I don’t think I would consciously exclude vegetarian but I can see how it would cause unhappiness and underlying issues. Part of a successful and happy relationship is enjoying shared moments and food definitely is a big part of that.

[Anonymous]

It comes down to how much they impose on you. I used to think I couldn't date a vegan because I had the "preachy vegan" stereotype in mind. And I've always liked to cook, so I thought anyone else's restrictions would cramp my style. But then I met my spouse, who doesn't care if I eat animal products, and whose veganism has inspired me to become a better cook of more than just meat and potatoes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have met plenty of high maintenance and picky eater omnivores. The worst high maintenance picky eater I know was like that as omnivore and she's like that as a vegetarian. These things are personality traits not a function of dietary preferences.

My college roommate was a religious vegetarian (Hindu) and she was one most of least picky, most adventurous eaters that I know. She was willing try different cuisines, different spices. She had no problem going to any restaurant and just figuring it out for herself. She had no problem with other people eating meat. She was always polite and respectful of other culinary traditions even when some foods were off-putting to her given her diet.

Being a picky eater and high maintenance about food, an absolute unequivocal deal breaker. But no, vegetarianism or vegan is not a deal breaker.

This 100%. My vegan spouse doesn't cause me any headaches, at home or at restaurants. (She accepts that she may have to settle for a salad and an order of fries at some places.) My "omnivore" parents, OTOH, are a serious PITA whenever I have to cook for them and infuriate at restaurants with their ludicrous substitution requests.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know what’s a worse problem to have...my neighbor’s husband doesn’t eat a single vegetable and he is a middle aged man. I find him difficult to cook for when we’re hosting. He literally looked at the lemon shallot cream sauce that I made in horror and said “I’ll pass”. Very picky eater!

With a diet like that, I see cholesterol, heart problems and really bad gas. Maybe he cut back with the markets limiting meat sales.
Your lemon shallot sauce sounds good. What did you serve it with?

[Anonymous]

Yes, but not a preachy one. I'm a vegetarian and not preachy at all. My husband and I have been happily married for 16 years and he's not a vegetarian and comes from a meat-loving Midwestern family.

[Anonymous]

I think it's more about their attitude towards food. I dated a girl who only ate fast food: McDonald's, Chick-fil-a, Chipotle, etc. Now that was an imposition. As long as they don't mind what I'm eating, and we can easily find places to eat together (if you live in any major city this shouldn't be too much of an issue), then I don't mind what they eat.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't want to marry someone who didn't like to travel, because I like to travel and a life with no travel would be sad. I want to marry someone with whom I can share experiences with. So for me personally, I do not think I would have seriously dated a vegetarian/vegan, because I love cooking and express my love that way a lot (cooking for someone). I like sharing meals together as a family etc.

That said, if I had been dating someone for a long time and we were looking at marriage and that person who I was already in love with decided to become a vegetarian I would not dump him over that. We'd make it work. I just wouldn't sign myself for that from the beginning.

And really I just consider it an interest diversion that would make life a little more annoying, not a fatal personality flaw or anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, but not a preachy one. I'm a vegetarian and not preachy at all. My husband and I have been happily married for 16 years and he's not a vegetarian and comes from a meat-loving Midwestern family.

My kids and I are vegetarian. We don't discuss it. It is our normal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a vegan (and had been for 5 years) when DH and I married. For various personal reasons I’m not a vegan anymore.

Really glad he didn’t reject me over something so minor!

Being a Vegan isn’t “minor”. I dated one picky eater a long time ago and would never choose to do it again.

Oh yes, it is minor. I’ve been with my DH for over 15 years, we have three kids, and we’ve been through our fair share of ups and downs in life. Eating habits are minor - as long as each respects the others’ preferences.

Everyone who replied to this thread should have added whether or not they are happily married and for how long, because I question how someone could endure life’s ups and downs with a partner if they’re so willing to eliminate someone based on veganism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a vegan (and had been for 5 years) when DH and I married. For various personal reasons I’m not a vegan anymore.

Really glad he didn’t reject me over something so minor!

Being a Vegan isn’t “minor”. I dated one picky eater a long time ago and would never choose to do it again.

Oh yes, it is minor. I’ve been with my DH for over 15 years, we have three kids, and we’ve been through our fair share of ups and downs in life. Eating habits are minor - as long as each respects the others’ preferences.

Everyone who replied to this thread should have added whether or not they are happily married and for how long, because I question how someone could endure life’s ups and downs with a partner if they’re so willing to eliminate someone based on veganism.

+1. Anyone who sees veganism as the same as being a "picky eater" (which comes with connotations of whining and demanding) has never really interacted with vegans -- at least not beyond the superficial.