Attending a Catholic church as a guest

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:If the preist doesn't know who you are, and you "act" Catholic (know what to do at the altar), he will likely serve you communion.

Why would a non-Catholic want to receive the Eucharist?

Maybe because the body of Christ is for all Christians, not just the Catholic ones.

Maybe because everyone is doing it and it doens't seem like a big deal - not realizing that Catholics believe it is the actual body of CHrist.

I'm an agnostic/atheist raised UU from a WASP background. This was a huge internal issue with me when my longterm partner's mother died and had a Catholic funeral. He is an atheist now, but from an observant family. I wanted to do whatever it was that would not rock the boat at a tragic funeral. I felt in between a rock and a hard place with what was most respectful; recusing myself and standing out as an already outsider, or being disrepectful to the faith and receiving communion. I made a last minute decision to not be the ONLY person in the church hanging back and took communion. I fretted and practiced beforehand in case it felt like the right thing to do. It was fine and funerals are for the living. I think it was well-received I didn't pick a funeral as the place to "take a stand."

I think you missed the point. Only Catholics in good standing can take communion at a Catholic funeral mass. I'm Episcopalian and my catholic MIL and friends would have been appalled if I had gone up to take communion. It's not proper and it's disrespectful to Catholics.

That was my point. I thought it was disrespectful, but everyone was SO relieved I bit my tongue and just went along with everyone and took communion instead of hanging back. I grew up with Catholics like this too, where I would have a sleepover with a friend, attend mass, and receive communion as a kid, so this does not seem to be a universal thing for more laid back Catholics.

They weren’t relievedthat you received Communion. They were relieved that you bit your tongue. Not at all the same.

How do you know?

Yeah, I didn't have a lot of religious opinions at 8 years old, so why the communion every time I went to Catholic church with friends and their family? Keep the kids together, move through it and get it over with. They would ask if my parents cared (didn't, means nothing to them) and then I would receive communion!

As an adult, people notice less, but if you are an outlier at a funeral it is weird. Made no difference to the inlaws or immediate family, so "just don't make a scene" and receiving the sacrament was more important.

:shrug:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the preist doesn't know who you are, and you "act" Catholic (know what to do at the altar), he will likely serve you communion.

Why would a non-Catholic want to receive the Eucharist?

Maybe because the body of Christ is for all Christians, not just the Catholic ones.

Maybe because everyone is doing it and it doens't seem like a big deal - not realizing that Catholics believe it is the actual body of CHrist.

I'm an agnostic/atheist raised UU from a WASP background. This was a huge internal issue with me when my longterm partner's mother died and had a Catholic funeral. He is an atheist now, but from an observant family. I wanted to do whatever it was that would not rock the boat at a tragic funeral. I felt in between a rock and a hard place with what was most respectful; recusing myself and standing out as an already outsider, or being disrepectful to the faith and receiving communion. I made a last minute decision to not be the ONLY person in the church hanging back and took communion. I fretted and practiced beforehand in case it felt like the right thing to do. It was fine and funerals are for the living. I think it was well-received I didn't pick a funeral as the place to "take a stand."

I think you missed the point. Only Catholics in good standing can take communion at a Catholic funeral mass. I'm Episcopalian and my catholic MIL and friends would have been appalled if I had gone up to take communion. It's not proper and it's disrespectful to Catholics.

That was my point. I thought it was disrespectful, but everyone was SO relieved I bit my tongue and just went along with everyone and took communion instead of hanging back. I grew up with Catholics like this too, where I would have a sleepover with a friend, attend mass, and receive communion as a kid, so this does not seem to be a universal thing for more laid back Catholics.

They weren’t relievedthat you received Communion. They were relieved that you bit your tongue. Not at all the same.

How do you know?

Yeah, I didn't have a lot of religious opinions at 8 years old, so why the communion every time I went to Catholic church with friends and their family? Keep the kids together, move through it and get it over with. They would ask if my parents cared (didn't, means nothing to them) and then I would receive communion!

As an adult, people notice less, but if you are an outlier at a funeral it is weird. Made no difference to the inlaws or immediate family, so "just don't make a scene" and receiving the sacrament was more important.

:shrug:

Yup. I was definitely pushed to take communion as a young teen visiting a friend's church a few times by the youth group leader, and I posted above about my FIL pushing it on Christmas because "it's what Jesus would want" (and I agree, but I'm Protestant and in my church it IS an open table).

I was old enough to know better by that point but it does happen and it can be pretty awkward to be like "no, I think your denomination thinks I'm unclean or my baptism doesn't count or something...it's not even my church so I don't know WHY this rule exists, but shouldn't you?"

[Anonymous]

Next time clowns feel like you are being coerced, just go up for communion and quietly say to the priest, “I’m not Catholic, should I receive?” He’ll say no, and give you a quick blessing.

Frankly I think you were misunderstanding your friends’ urging. They were probably just trying to get you to go up for a blessing, not to receive the Eucharist. There is nothing acceptable about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The suggestion that the Roman Church or any parish thereof has a binding "policy" mandating that non-Catholics traipse about at communion and ask for a "kiddie-blessing" for no reason other than to have people uniformly traipsing about is just silly. There is not any such official policy. And if some misguided cleric nonetheless should insist? What are they going to do? Send goons with shock-sticks to encourage the recalcitrant?

The Roman Eucharist is (with specific exemptions not relevant here) not open to non-Catholics. The Protestant "Lord's Table" may be open to all; that is up to the Protestants. Catholics are not permitted communion in Protestant churches, according to Catholic practice.

Moreover, Catholics do not "take" communion. They "receive" it. It is a gift, but only for members of the Roman Church. The inability of some clerics to communicate this is appalling. The whole "row by row, everybody go" communion "procession" is not required; it arose after Vatican II and causes well-meaning non-Catholics to feel pressured. That is an abuse. Just as we make non-family members feel welcome in our homes, Catholics can and do make non-Catholics feel welcome in church. But feeling welcome and being a family member are two different things.

A non-Catholic at a Catholic Mass should remain seated at Communion. There is no obligation to get up and wander about to "fit in." And, honestly, nobody will notice or care.

It's hard not to notice when most everyone is doing something and a few people aren't. You wonder, for instance, are they Catholic? If so, are they rebelling against the church or their family? have they sinned? Not been to confession lately and not been forgiven of their sins?

I wouldn't be at all surprised that some Catholics who were not in a state of grace have gone to communion just to keep people from wondering about them. That, of course is a sin in itself -- taking communion when not in a state of grace, i.e., not having confessed and been forgiven of one's sins

Op here. Being nosy is your problem. This particular mass is part of a high school graduation. Not all of the guests will be Catholic.

RIght, so people will wonder, is that person a catholic who is not in a state of grace or is it a non-catholic. It's not being "nosy" it's being observant -- when there's not much else to do except watch people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The suggestion that the Roman Church or any parish thereof has a binding "policy" mandating that non-Catholics traipse about at communion and ask for a "kiddie-blessing" for no reason other than to have people uniformly traipsing about is just silly. There is not any such official policy. And if some misguided cleric nonetheless should insist? What are they going to do? Send goons with shock-sticks to encourage the recalcitrant?

The Roman Eucharist is (with specific exemptions not relevant here) not open to non-Catholics. The Protestant "Lord's Table" may be open to all; that is up to the Protestants. Catholics are not permitted communion in Protestant churches, according to Catholic practice.

Moreover, Catholics do not "take" communion. They "receive" it. It is a gift, but only for members of the Roman Church. The inability of some clerics to communicate this is appalling. The whole "row by row, everybody go" communion "procession" is not required; it arose after Vatican II and causes well-meaning non-Catholics to feel pressured. That is an abuse. Just as we make non-family members feel welcome in our homes, Catholics can and do make non-Catholics feel welcome in church. But feeling welcome and being a family member are two different things.

A non-Catholic at a Catholic Mass should remain seated at Communion. There is no obligation to get up and wander about to "fit in." And, honestly, nobody will notice or care.

It's hard not to notice when most everyone is doing something and a few people aren't. You wonder, for instance, are they Catholic? If so, are they rebelling against the church or their family? have they sinned? Not been to confession lately and not been forgiven of their sins?

I wouldn't be at all surprised that some Catholics who were not in a state of grace have gone to communion just to keep people from wondering about them. That, of course is a sin in itself -- taking communion when not in a state of grace, i.e., not having confessed and been forgiven of one's sins

Op here. Being nosy is your problem. This particular mass is part of a high school graduation. Not all of the guests will be Catholic.

RIght, so people will wonder, is that person a catholic who is not in a state of grace or is it a non-catholic. It's not being "nosy" it's being observant -- when there's not much else to do except watch people.

or didn't fast, or already received communion (our school's baccalaureate mass is on a Sunday afternoon, there are always people who took their kids to church in the a.m. so they've already received), or are feeling queasy, or . . .

There are lots of reasons not to receive communion. There is no reason to judge someone who doesn't.

Furthermore, as a non-Catholic, I'm not sure why I should care that people are speculating that I might not be Catholic. It's not like I'm ashamed of my religion!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The suggestion that the Roman Church or any parish thereof has a binding "policy" mandating that non-Catholics traipse about at communion and ask for a "kiddie-blessing" for no reason other than to have people uniformly traipsing about is just silly. There is not any such official policy. And if some misguided cleric nonetheless should insist? What are they going to do? Send goons with shock-sticks to encourage the recalcitrant?

The Roman Eucharist is (with specific exemptions not relevant here) not open to non-Catholics. The Protestant "Lord's Table" may be open to all; that is up to the Protestants. Catholics are not permitted communion in Protestant churches, according to Catholic practice.

Moreover, Catholics do not "take" communion. They "receive" it. It is a gift, but only for members of the Roman Church. The inability of some clerics to communicate this is appalling. The whole "row by row, everybody go" communion "procession" is not required; it arose after Vatican II and causes well-meaning non-Catholics to feel pressured. That is an abuse. Just as we make non-family members feel welcome in our homes, Catholics can and do make non-Catholics feel welcome in church. But feeling welcome and being a family member are two different things.

A non-Catholic at a Catholic Mass should remain seated at Communion. There is no obligation to get up and wander about to "fit in." And, honestly, nobody will notice or care.

It's hard not to notice when most everyone is doing something and a few people aren't. You wonder, for instance, are they Catholic? If so, are they rebelling against the church or their family? have they sinned? Not been to confession lately and not been forgiven of their sins?

I wouldn't be at all surprised that some Catholics who were not in a state of grace have gone to communion just to keep people from wondering about them. That, of course is a sin in itself -- taking communion when not in a state of grace, i.e., not having confessed and been forgiven of one's sins

Op here. Being nosy is your problem. This particular mass is part of a high school graduation. Not all of the guests will be Catholic.

RIght, so people will wonder, is that person a catholic who is not in a state of grace or is it a non-catholic. It's not being "nosy" it's being observant -- when there's not much else to do except watch people.

or didn't fast, or already received communion (our school's baccalaureate mass is on a Sunday afternoon, there are always people who took their kids to church in the a.m. so they've already received), or are feeling queasy, or . . .

There are lots of reasons not to receive communion. There is no reason to judge someone who doesn't.

Furthermore, as a non-Catholic, I'm not sure why I should care that people are speculating that I might not be Catholic. It's not like I'm ashamed of my religion!

Not judging - just wondering. and you shouldn't care -- but do know that Catholics (like people of other religions) think they are superior to people of other religions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The suggestion that the Roman Church or any parish thereof has a binding "policy" mandating that non-Catholics traipse about at communion and ask for a "kiddie-blessing" for no reason other than to have people uniformly traipsing about is just silly. There is not any such official policy. And if some misguided cleric nonetheless should insist? What are they going to do? Send goons with shock-sticks to encourage the recalcitrant?

The Roman Eucharist is (with specific exemptions not relevant here) not open to non-Catholics. The Protestant "Lord's Table" may be open to all; that is up to the Protestants. Catholics are not permitted communion in Protestant churches, according to Catholic practice.

Moreover, Catholics do not "take" communion. They "receive" it. It is a gift, but only for members of the Roman Church. The inability of some clerics to communicate this is appalling. The whole "row by row, everybody go" communion "procession" is not required; it arose after Vatican II and causes well-meaning non-Catholics to feel pressured. That is an abuse. Just as we make non-family members feel welcome in our homes, Catholics can and do make non-Catholics feel welcome in church. But feeling welcome and being a family member are two different things.

A non-Catholic at a Catholic Mass should remain seated at Communion. There is no obligation to get up and wander about to "fit in." And, honestly, nobody will notice or care.

It's hard not to notice when most everyone is doing something and a few people aren't. You wonder, for instance, are they Catholic? If so, are they rebelling against the church or their family? have they sinned? Not been to confession lately and not been forgiven of their sins?

I wouldn't be at all surprised that some Catholics who were not in a state of grace have gone to communion just to keep people from wondering about them. That, of course is a sin in itself -- taking communion when not in a state of grace, i.e., not having confessed and been forgiven of one's sins

Op here. Being nosy is your problem. This particular mass is part of a high school graduation. Not all of the guests will be Catholic.

RIght, so people will wonder, is that person a catholic who is not in a state of grace or is it a non-catholic. It's not being "nosy" it's being observant -- when there's not much else to do except watch people.

So...?

The non Catholics won't be crossing themselves. No need to wonder.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The suggestion that the Roman Church or any parish thereof has a binding "policy" mandating that non-Catholics traipse about at communion and ask for a "kiddie-blessing" for no reason other than to have people uniformly traipsing about is just silly. There is not any such official policy. And if some misguided cleric nonetheless should insist? What are they going to do? Send goons with shock-sticks to encourage the recalcitrant?

The Roman Eucharist is (with specific exemptions not relevant here) not open to non-Catholics. The Protestant "Lord's Table" may be open to all; that is up to the Protestants. Catholics are not permitted communion in Protestant churches, according to Catholic practice.

Moreover, Catholics do not "take" communion. They "receive" it. It is a gift, but only for members of the Roman Church. The inability of some clerics to communicate this is appalling. The whole "row by row, everybody go" communion "procession" is not required; it arose after Vatican II and causes well-meaning non-Catholics to feel pressured. That is an abuse. Just as we make non-family members feel welcome in our homes, Catholics can and do make non-Catholics feel welcome in church. But feeling welcome and being a family member are two different things.

A non-Catholic at a Catholic Mass should remain seated at Communion. There is no obligation to get up and wander about to "fit in." And, honestly, nobody will notice or care.

It's hard not to notice when most everyone is doing something and a few people aren't. You wonder, for instance, are they Catholic? If so, are they rebelling against the church or their family? have they sinned? Not been to confession lately and not been forgiven of their sins?

I wouldn't be at all surprised that some Catholics who were not in a state of grace have gone to communion just to keep people from wondering about them. That, of course is a sin in itself -- taking communion when not in a state of grace, i.e., not having confessed and been forgiven of one's sins

Op here. Being nosy is your problem. This particular mass is part of a high school graduation. Not all of the guests will be Catholic.

RIght, so people will wonder, is that person a catholic who is not in a state of grace or is it a non-catholic. It's not being "nosy" it's being observant -- when there's not much else to do except watch people.

So...?

The non Catholics won't be crossing themselves. No need to wonder.

There are other denominations that cross themselves.

-- an Episcopalian

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The suggestion that the Roman Church or any parish thereof has a binding "policy" mandating that non-Catholics traipse about at communion and ask for a "kiddie-blessing" for no reason other than to have people uniformly traipsing about is just silly. There is not any such official policy. And if some misguided cleric nonetheless should insist? What are they going to do? Send goons with shock-sticks to encourage the recalcitrant?

The Roman Eucharist is (with specific exemptions not relevant here) not open to non-Catholics. The Protestant "Lord's Table" may be open to all; that is up to the Protestants. Catholics are not permitted communion in Protestant churches, according to Catholic practice.

Moreover, Catholics do not "take" communion. They "receive" it. It is a gift, but only for members of the Roman Church. The inability of some clerics to communicate this is appalling. The whole "row by row, everybody go" communion "procession" is not required; it arose after Vatican II and causes well-meaning non-Catholics to feel pressured. That is an abuse. Just as we make non-family members feel welcome in our homes, Catholics can and do make non-Catholics feel welcome in church. But feeling welcome and being a family member are two different things.

A non-Catholic at a Catholic Mass should remain seated at Communion. There is no obligation to get up and wander about to "fit in." And, honestly, nobody will notice or care.

It's hard not to notice when most everyone is doing something and a few people aren't. You wonder, for instance, are they Catholic? If so, are they rebelling against the church or their family? have they sinned? Not been to confession lately and not been forgiven of their sins?

I wouldn't be at all surprised that some Catholics who were not in a state of grace have gone to communion just to keep people from wondering about them. That, of course is a sin in itself -- taking communion when not in a state of grace, i.e., not having confessed and been forgiven of one's sins

Op here. Being nosy is your problem. This particular mass is part of a high school graduation. Not all of the guests will be Catholic.

RIght, so people will wonder, is that person a catholic who is not in a state of grace or is it a non-catholic. It's not being "nosy" it's being observant -- when there's not much else to do except watch people.

Aren't you supposed to be praying before and after receiving communion?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

In your opinion and according to the tenets of the Catholic church. But it is "OK" with a lot of practicing Catholics who don't follow lots of other church rules - like birth control.

Relativism aside, it is not an "opinion," but rather a matter of unambiguous church discipline (law). And while a given individual's observance or non-observance of church teachings may be between them and God, it is scandalous for them to encourage others to approach sacrament s for which they are neither properly prepared nor suitably disposed.

Thank God (literally) that Jesus Himself didn’t hold the apostles to this arrogant and ridiculous standard at the Last Supper...

BTW — if the RCC actually enforced its own subjective laws pertaining to the reception of the Eucharist — I suspect at least 95% of Church attendees every Sunday would be found ineligible for one reason or another, including the priest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

In your opinion and according to the tenets of the Catholic church. But it is "OK" with a lot of practicing Catholics who don't follow lots of other church rules - like birth control.

Relativism aside, it is not an "opinion," but rather a matter of unambiguous church discipline (law). And while a given individual's observance or non-observance of church teachings may be between them and God, it is scandalous for them to encourage others to approach sacrament s for which they are neither properly prepared nor suitably disposed.

Thank God (literally) that Jesus Himself didn’t hold the apostles to this arrogant and ridiculous standard at the Last Supper...

BTW — if the RCC actually enforced its own subjective laws pertaining to the reception of the Eucharist — I suspect at least 95% of Church attendees every Sunday would be found ineligible for one reason or another, including the priest.

You're correct. Got the standard wrong -- backward.

It is "suitably prepared and properly disposed."

That is the precise wording of the relevant Canon.

As for the standard Jesus held the Apostles to at the Last Supper, what do you know about their respective interior dispositions at the first Eucharist, other than perhaps Judas? They certainly were suitably prepared. He had been preparing them for years. Their proper disposition can be inferred (despite incidents of cowardice along the way) from the vast majority of them having died as martyrs.

As for the vast majority of people being unworthy, no one ever really is worthy. But the Church invites its members in Christ's name, asking only that persons in a state of grave sin refrain lest they eat and drink to their condemnation, as St. Paul writes.

[Anonymous]

In case anyone wonders, probably half the church stayed seated.

The lady behind us was quite vocal about disliking having non-Catholics in attendance.