What do you do when a teacher makes your child feel miserable

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DD had an abusive 1st grade teacher. Although she is a rule follower and wasn't targeted by the teacher, she was still petrified that the teacher would 'correct her behavior." The teacher reprimanded kids for leaving a gap in the line when walking in the hallway. She would point out that you didn't push in your chair. God forbid you didn't know the five assignments exactly in the correct order and had to ask her or a classmate. SHe was bat-sh!t crazy mean.

I never said anything but gave DD lots of love at school and told her some teachers, like other people have issues and gain gratification by putting others down. I also gave examples to other parents so they knew about her.

Reflecting a few years later, I should have pulled her from the class. I regret that I didn't. I feel it took years for DD to recover and come back out of her shell.

My advice would be to get examples for the principal chat and then pull your kid immediately. If the principal won't let you, I'd be meeting with the superintendent with my examples.

Wait. Asking kids to push their chairs in and to walk in a single file line is mean? Come spend some time in a school to see how it looks when kids can’t walk in a line (especially during a fire drill!). Or when kids trip and fall because chairs aren’t pushed in. Those are normal things for kids to be learning in first grade. Someone sounds crazy here...not sure it’s the teacher!

Yeah, this one doesn't strike me as mean either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like your child is not enrolled in the appropriate courses or is involved in too many activities after school if she is staying up until midnight or 1am to complete homework. Next year could she take an easier course and use your phone to access the internet if she needs it for school? We are halfway through the 4th quarter so a teacher change is not going to happen. Have you spoken with her counselor?

NP How old are your kids? This is a typical homework load now.

It’s not typical for an 8th grader to spend from the time they get home from school until midnight to 1am working on homework. I respectfully disagree. OP says her child comes home on mass transit to arrive before dark. 8th grader’s do not typically work on homework for that long.

Where do you see 8th grade? I missed it. Thought it was a high school kid.

OP said on the first page that this is an 8th grader.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I told the teacher. I told her, "Are you aware that DD and her friends are all afraid of you? Did you know this used to be DD's favorite subject until she got you as a teacher?"

Her jaw dropped. She sputtered and then shot back with how DD was not completing all the Kahn Academy stuff she was assigning.

Me: Yes, I sent you an email that she wouldn't be able to complete it - she does not have access to a computer at home.
Her: She can use the computer lab at school.
Me: DD is already staying up until midnight or 1am to complete all her homework. I will not have her getting up at 5:30am so she arrives at school having had 5 or 6 hours of sleep.
Her: She can use the computer lab after school.
Me: She takes mass transit and then walks a mile home alone and has to be home before it's dark for safety purposes. If you would like to stay late with DD and then take her home that would be fine with me.
Her: This is very inconvenient.
Me: Yes, it is very inconvenient for me as well, to be a single, working mother who can not afford to give my child a laptop, yet here we are.


Yet you post on DCUM? Something's fishy.


People have access to DCUM at work. Ever think of that?

Why can't you afford to buy your child a laptop? You can buy used or refurbished ones for a low price. It's really critical that your child has one for school. Or maybe you could ask if the PTA could give your child a scholarship to help pay for one.

If OP says she can't afford it, maybe just take her at her word?

Insisting that every child must use a computer to complete their homework is classist as hell. Even if it's just a hundred bucks, some people simply can't do it, especially if they're a single parent.

It's not classist, it's the world we live in. OP could get a refurbished chromebook for $150. No excuses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like your child is not enrolled in the appropriate courses or is involved in too many activities after school if she is staying up until midnight or 1am to complete homework. Next year could she take an easier course and use your phone to access the internet if she needs it for school? We are halfway through the 4th quarter so a teacher change is not going to happen. Have you spoken with her counselor?

NP How old are your kids? This is a typical homework load now.

It’s not typical for an 8th grader to spend from the time they get home from school until midnight to 1am working on homework. I respectfully disagree. OP says her child comes home on mass transit to arrive before dark. 8th grader’s do not typically work on homework for that long.

Where do you see 8th grade? I missed it. Thought it was a high school kid.

If this is the case the kid can easily stay after school. Plus the mom should not be fighting these battles for her grown kid. Sometimes people didnt like you, time to deal with it.That's life. If the kids is grown up enough to take mass transit to school she's grown up enough to get a weekend job and buy a laptop.

OP is a huge excuse makes and it doesn't surprise me she's in the position she is in.

[Anonymous]

Change teachers or change schools

[Anonymous]

OP, it's too late at this point to change teachers. At the end of the school year (after grades are posted to avoid any potential retaliation) I'd write a detailed email to the principal outlining everything the teacher has done throughout the year. Say you've spoken to the teacher with no improvement. Don't just make an appointment and talk to the principal in person. Things that are only reported orally have no record. If you want to also talk with the principal in person, request a meeting in the email.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like your child is not enrolled in the appropriate courses or is involved in too many activities after school if she is staying up until midnight or 1am to complete homework. Next year could she take an easier course and use your phone to access the internet if she needs it for school? We are halfway through the 4th quarter so a teacher change is not going to happen. Have you spoken with her counselor?

NP How old are your kids? This is a typical homework load now.

It’s not typical for an 8th grader to spend from the time they get home from school until midnight to 1am working on homework. I respectfully disagree. OP says her child comes home on mass transit to arrive before dark. 8th grader’s do not typically work on homework for that long.

Where do you see 8th grade? I missed it. Thought it was a high school kid.

OP said on the first page that this is an 8th grader.

But the poster who had the argument with the teacher about internet access didn't say she was the OP.

[Anonymous]

My DS had a middle school science teacher who was loong over due to retire and she was a b!tch from he//. She bullied my kid so bad he fainted in her class. I went in to talk to her and found her bitter, old and caustic. It was child abuse but the school wouldn't fire her because she was so close to retirement. If I ever see her I am going to tell her off.

How many kids loath science because of her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I told the teacher. I told her, "Are you aware that DD and her friends are all afraid of you? Did you know this used to be DD's favorite subject until she got you as a teacher?"

Her jaw dropped. She sputtered and then shot back with how DD was not completing all the Kahn Academy stuff she was assigning.

Me: Yes, I sent you an email that she wouldn't be able to complete it - she does not have access to a computer at home.
Her: She can use the computer lab at school.
Me: DD is already staying up until midnight or 1am to complete all her homework. I will not have her getting up at 5:30am so she arrives at school having had 5 or 6 hours of sleep.
Her: She can use the computer lab after school.
Me: She takes mass transit and then walks a mile home alone and has to be home before it's dark for safety purposes. If you would like to stay late with DD and then take her home that would be fine with me.
Her: This is very inconvenient.
Me: Yes, it is very inconvenient for me as well, to be a single, working mother who can not afford to give my child a laptop, yet here we are.


Yet you post on DCUM? Something's fishy.


People have access to DCUM at work. Ever think of that?

Why can't you afford to buy your child a laptop? You can buy used or refurbished ones for a low price. It's really critical that your child has one for school. Or maybe you could ask if the PTA could give your child a scholarship to help pay for one.

If OP says she can't afford it, maybe just take her at her word?

Insisting that every child must use a computer to complete their homework is classist as hell. Even if it's just a hundred bucks, some people simply can't do it, especially if they're a single parent.

It's not classist, it's the world we live in. OP could get a refurbished chromebook for $150. No excuses.

My son played on a soccer team with a bunch of kids who couldn't have scraped together that $150, and even if they could, it wouldn't do much good without internet in the house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I told the teacher. I told her, "Are you aware that DD and her friends are all afraid of you? Did you know this used to be DD's favorite subject until she got you as a teacher?"

Her jaw dropped. She sputtered and then shot back with how DD was not completing all the Kahn Academy stuff she was assigning.

Me: Yes, I sent you an email that she wouldn't be able to complete it - she does not have access to a computer at home.
Her: She can use the computer lab at school.
Me: DD is already staying up until midnight or 1am to complete all her homework. I will not have her getting up at 5:30am so she arrives at school having had 5 or 6 hours of sleep.
Her: She can use the computer lab after school.
Me: She takes mass transit and then walks a mile home alone and has to be home before it's dark for safety purposes. If you would like to stay late with DD and then take her home that would be fine with me.
Her: This is very inconvenient.
Me: Yes, it is very inconvenient for me as well, to be a single, working mother who can not afford to give my child a laptop, yet here we are.


Yet you post on DCUM? Something's fishy.


People have access to DCUM at work. Ever think of that?

Why can't you afford to buy your child a laptop? You can buy used or refurbished ones for a low price. It's really critical that your child has one for school. Or maybe you could ask if the PTA could give your child a scholarship to help pay for one.

If OP says she can't afford it, maybe just take her at her word?

Insisting that every child must use a computer to complete their homework is classist as hell. Even if it's just a hundred bucks, some people simply can't do it, especially if they're a single parent.

It's not classist, it's the world we live in. OP could get a refurbished chromebook for $150. No excuses.

My son played on a soccer team with a bunch of kids who couldn't have scraped together that $150, and even if they could, it wouldn't do much good without internet in the house.

How much did it cost to join he soccer team and buy supplies? Priorities matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teachers don't "pick on students".

Maybe the teacher is trying to guide/challenge/push/teach your daughter in a manner that your daughter might not understand or like?

My son's best friend says that their Spanish teacher "picks on him" in class because the teacher makes him answer oral questions or give his opinion when he'd like to just stay quiet and fill out worksheets. My son is in the same class and says she makes everyone talk (which is different than last year's teacher), some kids just have anxiety about it and feel judged.

Maybe there is a second side to the story?

Regardless, summer is almost here. It's over.

I was a classroom teacher for many years. Teachers absolutely pick on students. It happens all the time. Don’t kid yourself.

And then these teachers expect gifts and sweet cards for TAW. Ridiculous

[Anonymous]

I had two teachers like that. It happens all over the world. My English and my Literature teachers in HS. Back in Europe my English teacher picked and picked on me, for not talking with the British accent! She spent 2 weeks in Scotland, I picked up more accent from US movies. And while I was the most accomplished in conversation, she would give me a bad grade for conversation, while the kids who took half an hour to say two sentences got best grades! "They took time to say it properly!" I write really well, but my Literature teacher knew I always read everything, and other kids didn't, yet she didn't like my style! But, honest to good, I was a Ms know it all back then, and that was annoying. Well, to these two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teachers don't "pick on students".

Maybe the teacher is trying to guide/challenge/push/teach your daughter in a manner that your daughter might not understand or like?

My son's best friend says that their Spanish teacher "picks on him" in class because the teacher makes him answer oral questions or give his opinion when he'd like to just stay quiet and fill out worksheets. My son is in the same class and says she makes everyone talk (which is different than last year's teacher), some kids just have anxiety about it and feel judged.

Maybe there is a second side to the story?

Regardless, summer is almost here. It's over.

Really? My DS has been in a class all year where he complained about the teacher singling him out. He's my 4th kid so I thought it likely the teacher was just challenging him as you say. I encouraged him to work through it, that not every teacher was a good fit, etc. - until a few weeks ago. At that time, a friend sent my DD a video another student had secretly recorded in DS' classroom. It shows incredibly inappropriate behavior of the teacher towards DS. I was horrified. I immediately sent it to the principal and counselor. The teacher was put on administrative leave the same day and hasn't been in the classroom since.

BTW - DS also has anxiety. Your comment about 'some kids just have anxiety' is shows you're as ignorant as DS' teacher. That was one of the reasons she targeted and judged him. You really shouldn't opine on things you know nothing about.

Yeah right.

Yup, just like what happened here. https://abc13.com/education/student-secretly-records-months-of-teachers-verbal-abuse/5285565/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I told the teacher. I told her, "Are you aware that DD and her friends are all afraid of you? Did you know this used to be DD's favorite subject until she got you as a teacher?"

Her jaw dropped. She sputtered and then shot back with how DD was not completing all the Kahn Academy stuff she was assigning.

Me: Yes, I sent you an email that she wouldn't be able to complete it - she does not have access to a computer at home.
Her: She can use the computer lab at school.
Me: DD is already staying up until midnight or 1am to complete all her homework. I will not have her getting up at 5:30am so she arrives at school having had 5 or 6 hours of sleep.
Her: She can use the computer lab after school.
Me: She takes mass transit and then walks a mile home alone and has to be home before it's dark for safety purposes. If you would like to stay late with DD and then take her home that would be fine with me.
Her: This is very inconvenient.
Me: Yes, it is very inconvenient for me as well, to be a single, working mother who can not afford to give my child a laptop, yet here we are.

Yet you post on DCUM? Something's fishy.

I didn’t post this. OP here