Married outside the Catholic Church- can I come back?

[Anonymous]

Married in the Arlington Diocese to a non- Catholic Christian. We even had a visiting priest although our pre nuptial counseling was with the parish priest. Children baptized and confirmed in a very conservative ( rules are rules) parish in Arlington Diocese. Have friends that have followed favorite priests to new parishes outside of their geographic boundaries all with no problems. It sounds like you need to find a parish that suits you and register.

[Anonymous]

OP, this might be a drive for you, but you might want to try Nativity Catholic Church in Burke. They are very welcoming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go to a church in a different diocese. My ex and I split before my daughter was born and I had no problems getting her baptized in the Church. The archdioceses of Washington or Baltimore are both friendlier and welcoming.

Yes, this. I had an interfaith wedding in a local Franciscan church that included a mass. Other parishes are much friendlier.

[Anonymous]

Another Protestant here, married in a Catholic church in Chicago. Our oldest was baptized there too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Find a different diocese. My twice-divorced Jewish DH and I had no trouble having our child baptized in the Catholic Church. I promised to raise him Catholic and we had two Catholic godparents.

OP here. I can't choose a different diocese. I was told you could only register or have children baptized at your correct parrish and church. I also was not able to be a godparent to my best friend's child because of this.

I'd like to become Catholic again.

PP here. Yes, I was told that too. I ignored it and went elsewhere.

+1 that isn't universally true; it is a parish policy. My kids were baptized in several different churches so grandparents could be there, etc. Parish policies are set by the pastor and some are more conservative than others. Shop around for a more liberal Catholic church.

[Anonymous]

you do not need to be married in the catholic church to have your child baptised in the church. i know because i did it. you can also be members of the church without being married in the Church.

i'm in the process now of getting married in the catholic church. they haven't pushed RCIA on my husband, but he's eastern orthodox.

FWIW -- i'm also in Arlington, but we go to a Franciscan parish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH and I were married outside of the Catholic Church due to some issues I'd had with my local church (Arlington diocese). They had kept reiterating that DH needed to go through RCIA to get married there. I know we could have just had a Catholic ceremony even though he was Protestant, but the church kept pushing RCIA.

Anyways, it's been a decade now and I miss the Catholic church. 5 years ago I started attending my local Catholic church weekly for several years. I wanted to baptize my baby there when she was born, but was told I could not because we weren't married in the Catholic church. They then sent me a letter telling me I wasn't welcome to take communion or participate until I had my marriage blessed. DH agreed, but after meeting with the priest the "blessing" sounded more like a marriage ceremony with witnesses even. We also had to have many meetings with the priest and they pushed RCIA again.

So is this just how it is? If you're not married in the Church you can't attend/register? What if I just wanted to attend without DH and wanted my kids to attend with me?

You are welcome in the Catholic Church... I am very confused about the circumstances of your marriage. At the time you were seeking marriage in the Catholic Church, was your husband a baptized Protestant? The Church absolutely allows the marriage of two baptized Christians, one Protestant, the other Catholic. This is not an unusual circumstance. (A Catholic is also permitted to marry a non-Christian but this requires a dispensation. ). But it is a precept of the Church to be married in the Church. What the Church asks of you is a convalidation of your marriage - the “blessing” you describe. There is helpful information about convalidation here. http://www.foryourmarriage.org/convalidation-bringing-your-marriage-into-the-church/ You should be able to do this without your husband having to attend RCIA. I recommend you consider calling the Marriage and Family Life Office at the Arlington Diocese. They should be able to help you navigate this. Best wishes. https://www.arlingtondiocese.org/marriageandfamily/