How to make her life miserable

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are a toxic, nasty person OP.

I don't think so. This is a sign of coping with loss of marriage. He seems bitter and angry at the moment, which is very natural. I do not believe that women are the victims all the time in divorces because I have seen a lot of women be toxic, nasty and manipulative and benefiting from divorce laws too.

- a happily married for 25+ years DW on her first and last marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are a toxic, nasty person OP.

I don't think so. This is a sign of coping with loss of marriage. He seems bitter and angry at the moment, which is very natural. I do not believe that women are the victims all the time in divorces because I have seen a lot of women be toxic, nasty and manipulative and benefiting from divorce laws too.

- a happily married for 25+ years DW on her first and last marriage.

Being willing to make the person who is coparenting your kids miserable is not natural. I and my DH exert a lot of effort propping up my XH’s life so DD isn’t harmed by his misery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some states have no-fault laws and that gets exploited by unscrupulous people. OP, I do not doubt that your STBX is a horrible person and you are reeling with the feeling that she has been rewarded at your expense by doing terrible things to you and your family.

How can you put things behind you? Especially when you have to pay maintainence and child-support, lost full custody of children, have to give a share of your future earnings, had to give 50% of your assets, have to still pay the burden of her CC debts and bad credit, she got the house, you cannot leave the state, she messed up the kids, she made you poor and she cheated and is flaunting her lovers? In every single way it seems she did better than you?

This is what my ex-husband did to me. Bipolar disorder is a horrible illness.

I got my revenge by taking the high road and being the best parent I could, rebuilding my own financial stability, and refusing to let my failed marriage jade me. I did the work to heal emotionally, and am a whole person on my own.

Making someone else miserable won’t make you happy, OP. Happiness comes from within.

I’m sorry you are hurting now, though, and I wish you peace.

[Anonymous]

Have an affair, then have your affair partner move into a house on the same block as your ex wife and enroll her kids in the same school, join the same neighborhood pool, and put her kids in the same sport and taekwando programs as your kids.

That's pretty heinous and antagonistic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are a toxic, nasty person OP.

I don't think so. This is a sign of coping with loss of marriage. He seems bitter and angry at the moment, which is very natural. I do not believe that women are the victims all the time in divorces because I have seen a lot of women be toxic, nasty and manipulative and benefiting from divorce laws too.

- a happily married for 25+ years DW on her first and last marriage.

Being willing to make the person who is coparenting your kids miserable is not natural. I and my DH exert a lot of effort propping up my XH’s life so DD isn’t harmed by his misery.

Oh, come off from your high horse and STFU! People wish terrible things on people who have harmed them, but then they DO NOT translate murderous thoughts into action in real life. I can see OP is venting. I am surprised that you do not. Maybe because you are one of those women who cheated with your current husband and took your ex to the cleaners?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some states have no-fault laws and that gets exploited by unscrupulous people. OP, I do not doubt that your STBX is a horrible person and you are reeling with the feeling that she has been rewarded at your expense by doing terrible things to you and your family.

How can you put things behind you? Especially when you have to pay maintainence and child-support, lost full custody of children, have to give a share of your future earnings, had to give 50% of your assets, have to still pay the burden of her CC debts and bad credit, she got the house, you cannot leave the state, she messed up the kids, she made you poor and she cheated and is flaunting her lovers? In every single way it seems she did better than you?

This is what my ex-husband did to me. Bipolar disorder is a horrible illness.

I got my revenge by taking the high road and being the best parent I could, rebuilding my own financial stability, and refusing to let my failed marriage jade me. I did the work to heal emotionally, and am a whole person on my own.

Making someone else miserable won’t make you happy, OP. Happiness comes from within.

I’m sorry you are hurting now, though, and I wish you peace.

This. Eventually, you will move on and this too shall pass. It is the darkest before dawn. I truly believe this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m separated from a douche like you. He tries every day to needle me, and most times I can let it go. He hates it and just tries harder and harder to get a rise out of me. I’m so happy to be free of him that pretty much nothing can bother me at a cellular level. He’s an annoying gnat flitting around and that’s it. So happy picking on your ex to you. You’re the only one who will come out of it in pain- promise you that.

Seems like you have a lot of bitterness though. You don't seem to have moved on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have an affair, then have your affair partner move into a house on the same block as your ex wife and enroll her kids in the same school, join the same neighborhood pool, and put her kids in the same sport and taekwando programs as your kids.

That's pretty heinous and antagonistic.

Ouch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have an affair, then have your affair partner move into a house on the same block as your ex wife and enroll her kids in the same school, join the same neighborhood pool, and put her kids in the same sport and taekwando programs as your kids.

That's pretty heinous and antagonistic.

Yes, what’s really key here is to screw over as many kids as possible. As long as the kids are remotely happy, you will not have succeeded in making your XW miserable. Make sure the kids are aware of this project and try to enlist their help. In fact, trying to make Mom unhappy should be the only activity you do with your kids, OP. Tell them to spy on her and punish them if they hesitate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are a toxic, nasty person OP.

I don't think so. This is a sign of coping with loss of marriage. He seems bitter and angry at the moment, which is very natural. I do not believe that women are the victims all the time in divorces because I have seen a lot of women be toxic, nasty and manipulative and benefiting from divorce laws too.

- a happily married for 25+ years DW on her first and last marriage.

Being willing to make the person who is coparenting your kids miserable is not natural. I and my DH exert a lot of effort propping up my XH’s life so DD isn’t harmed by his misery.

Oh, come off from your high horse and STFU! People wish terrible things on people who have harmed them, but then they DO NOT translate murderous thoughts into action in real life. I can see OP is venting. I am surprised that you do not. Maybe because you are one of those women who cheated with your current husband and took your ex to the cleaners?

Lol! Never cheated. I have always made more than my XH and get $100/mo CS when he’s employed. Met my DH eight years after my divorce. We realize XH is always going to be miserable, but we can help shelter DD from some of it. If anything, I wish him great happiness for the sake of our child.

[Anonymous]

Avoid behaving in a way that justifies the divorce to her and to onlookers.

If you avoid that, you take away ammunition, sow doubt, and don't accrue more regret yourself. You end up positioning yourself to thrive again without her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Revenge in divorce = spending $100K+ so hopefully you have that kind of money for lawyers...

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Revenge in divorce = spending $100K+ so hopefully you have that kind of money for lawyers...

This.

Nothing left over for therapy for the kids, but that’ll be her problem, right?

[Anonymous]

OP - by NOT being a sh*tty person, you make her question if she should have divorced you ...

[Anonymous]

What did you do OP?