Ever seem like people in the same HHI range as you are much wealthier?

[Anonymous]

When our kids were young we lived in California for a few years and people lived well over their heads. One night we sat with a mortgage broker for a refi and he couldn't believe how much we had in savings and how we were borrowing far less than we were capable of. He said that for most people in CA that he dealt with their home was their only asset and they were leveraged to the max with mortgage loans, car leases etc. When the recession hit it became obvious who those people were with for sale signs all over the place. These people lived incredibly well but right on the edge. It was very sad to see but we were very happy that we were fiscally very conservative.

[Anonymous]

We're probably an example of what you're talking about. My H makes around $700k, I'm a SAHM with a part time nanny, we live in a cute house in a close in neighborhood, we have two luxury cars in the drive way (~50k and 85K), we have season tickets at the Lincoln Center, we have three kids who are in a bunch of expensive activities like horseback riding, private tennis lessons, we belong to a CC, and we go on 4 great week long trips a year plus long weekends here and there.

Our secret is that we don't have any debt so our income goes pretty far. We've managed to save $3M in the last ten years. We bought our house years ago before the bubble so we didn't pay the premium that people pay now. Then when my H's company went public, we sold some stock and paid off all our debt including the mortgage.

Because we're saving so much we feel like it's ok to splurge now and then, such as on the cars, the trips, the renovation projects we've taken on (paid 40k to repave our drive way last year, we're finishing out basement this year, turning our garage into an apartment, etc.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When our kids were young we lived in California for a few years and people lived well over their heads. One night we sat with a mortgage broker for a refi and he couldn't believe how much we had in savings and how we were borrowing far less than we were capable of. He said that for most people in CA that he dealt with their home was their only asset and they were leveraged to the max with mortgage loans, car leases etc. When the recession hit it became obvious who those people were with for sale signs all over the place. These people lived incredibly well but right on the edge. It was very sad to see but we were very happy that we were fiscally very conservative.

I’m convinced this is the case most of the time. We have a much smaller mortgage than we can afford and sometimes it seems people assume we make way less than we do. I figure this is because of their own spending habits that they make this assumption

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're probably an example of what you're talking about. My H makes around $700k, I'm a SAHM with a part time nanny, we live in a cute house in a close in neighborhood, we have two luxury cars in the drive way (~50k and 85K), we have season tickets at the Lincoln Center, we have three kids who are in a bunch of expensive activities like horseback riding, private tennis lessons, we belong to a CC, and we go on 4 great week long trips a year plus long weekends here and there.

Our secret is that we don't have any debt so our income goes pretty far. We've managed to save $3M in the last ten years. We bought our house years ago before the bubble so we didn't pay the premium that people pay now. Then when my H's company went public, we sold some stock and paid off all our debt including the mortgage.

Because we're saving so much we feel like it's ok to splurge now and then, such as on the cars, the trips, the renovation projects we've taken on (paid 40k to repave our drive way last year, we're finishing out basement this year, turning our garage into an apartment, etc.)

No, you are not. You aren't in the same HHI range as 95% of the people on this thread. You are just rich people that like to buy rich people stuff with your rich people money. Which is all fine, but your post is really a non-sequitor, the purpose of which was to humblebrag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're probably an example of what you're talking about. My H makes around $700k, I'm a SAHM with a part time nanny, we live in a cute house in a close in neighborhood, we have two luxury cars in the drive way (~50k and 85K), we have season tickets at the Lincoln Center, we have three kids who are in a bunch of expensive activities like horseback riding, private tennis lessons, we belong to a CC, and we go on 4 great week long trips a year plus long weekends here and there.

Our secret is that we don't have any debt so our income goes pretty far. We've managed to save $3M in the last ten years. We bought our house years ago before the bubble so we didn't pay the premium that people pay now. Then when my H's company went public, we sold some stock and paid off all our debt including the mortgage.

Because we're saving so much we feel like it's ok to splurge now and then, such as on the cars, the trips, the renovation projects we've taken on (paid 40k to repave our drive way last year, we're finishing out basement this year, turning our garage into an apartment, etc.)

No, you are not. You aren't in the same HHI range as 95% of the people on this thread. You are just rich people that like to buy rich people stuff with your rich people money. Which is all fine, but your post is really a non-sequitor, the purpose of which was to humblebrag.

The point is, our neighbors probably wonder how we can afford the house and still travel like we do or fund our renovations. I’ve heard comments from them like “oh just wanted to see the million dollar driveway.”

My point to OP is that 1.) we bought young and never really wasted money on rent and 2.) we paid off the mortgage very early on so didn’t waste much money on interest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't forget some people also may have started with no debt, inherited money, or sold their first house for a big profit - all of that matters when comparing lifestyles, even when income is the same.

Yup. I'm 40. I bought my first house in 2000, at age 22. I made $225k off that, then bought another, made another 150k, and another made only 50k and now live in a very nice home well above what most people in our income level might afford. Having a $2,300/mo mortgage in a. Neighborhood with homes worth 7 figures allows for a lot of flexibility. I was done having kids at age 28, which has left me in my prime earning years with nearly no childcare costs with my prime earning years in full swing. Many of my colleagues and friends the same age have small children and are facing down the need to move due to schools and are squeezed by housing and daycare, neither of which are financial concerns of mine.

If you are 40, weren't you a new college grad or just a year or so out of college in 2000? Where did you get enough money to buy a house (even at 2000 real estate prices) at the age???

Did you inherit money/have a trust fund? Marry someone older & more established who paid for the bulk of the costs involved in buying then owning a house? Get a large cash gift from your parents or another relative when you graduated/turned 21/whatever? Get an interest free, no credit check required loan from a parent or other relative?

Or did you skip or put off going to college after high school so that, while most of your DCUM peers were in college making little to no money (&, in some cases, aquiring large amounts of debt in the form of student loans), you were working full time & saving a lot of your salary by living very frugally (or living with your parents )?

My husband and I bought in 04 when I was 24 with only 10% down, which he had from savings (he was 27). Got us a very cute starter home in Bethesda. Sold that for profit and moved to CC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're probably an example of what you're talking about. My H makes around $700k, I'm a SAHM with a part time nanny, we live in a cute house in a close in neighborhood, we have two luxury cars in the drive way (~50k and 85K), we have season tickets at the Lincoln Center, we have three kids who are in a bunch of expensive activities like horseback riding, private tennis lessons, we belong to a CC, and we go on 4 great week long trips a year plus long weekends here and there.

Our secret is that we don't have any debt so our income goes pretty far. We've managed to save $3M in the last ten years. We bought our house years ago before the bubble so we didn't pay the premium that people pay now. Then when my H's company went public, we sold some stock and paid off all our debt including the mortgage.

Because we're saving so much we feel like it's ok to splurge now and then, such as on the cars, the trips, the renovation projects we've taken on (paid 40k to repave our drive way last year, we're finishing out basement this year, turning our garage into an apartment, etc.)

No, you are not. You aren't in the same HHI range as 95% of the people on this thread. You are just rich people that like to buy rich people stuff with your rich people money. Which is all fine, but your post is really a non-sequitor, the purpose of which was to humblebrag.

The point is, our neighbors probably wonder how we can afford the house and still travel like we do or fund our renovations. I’ve heard comments from them like “oh just wanted to see the million dollar driveway.”

My point to OP is that 1.) we bought young and never really wasted money on rent and 2.) we paid off the mortgage very early on so didn’t waste much money on interest.

Your Income is 700k even after taxes that's at least 350k you can live off of 100k and save the rest 250k a year you would have alot more than 3M

Your income is what is getting you where you are

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1.They may make a lot more than you think
2. They have little savings.
3. Inheritance or a trust.

Don't lose sleep over this. If you have a nice cushion, you shouldn't lose any sleep.

Yup, this. I happen to know that DH and I have a higher HHI than either of my siblings, but we probably live the least extravagantly. In my sister's case, her FIL pays for her kids' private school and will pay for their college. In my brother's, he and his wife are younger and on the upward trajectories of very high-paying professions. None of us have any education debt, but neither of my siblings have much savings. Instead, my siblings both count my parents' money in a way I just can't stomach (and my sister also has a rich FIL). And, honestly, I could probably afford to do the same, but DH and I choose not to do so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're probably an example of what you're talking about. My H makes around $700k, I'm a SAHM with a part time nanny, we live in a cute house in a close in neighborhood, we have two luxury cars in the drive way (~50k and 85K), we have season tickets at the Lincoln Center, we have three kids who are in a bunch of expensive activities like horseback riding, private tennis lessons, we belong to a CC, and we go on 4 great week long trips a year plus long weekends here and there.

Our secret is that we don't have any debt so our income goes pretty far. We've managed to save $3M in the last ten years. We bought our house years ago before the bubble so we didn't pay the premium that people pay now. Then when my H's company went public, we sold some stock and paid off all our debt including the mortgage.

Because we're saving so much we feel like it's ok to splurge now and then, such as on the cars, the trips, the renovation projects we've taken on (paid 40k to repave our drive way last year, we're finishing out basement this year, turning our garage into an apartment, etc.)

No, you are not. You aren't in the same HHI range as 95% of the people on this thread. You are just rich people that like to buy rich people stuff with your rich people money. Which is all fine, but your post is really a non-sequitor, the purpose of which was to humblebrag.

The point is, our neighbors probably wonder how we can afford the house and still travel like we do or fund our renovations. I’ve heard comments from them like “oh just wanted to see the million dollar driveway.”

My point to OP is that 1.) we bought young and never really wasted money on rent and 2.) we paid off the mortgage very early on so didn’t waste much money on interest.

Your Income is 700k even after taxes that's at least 350k you can live off of 100k and save the rest 250k a year you would have alot more than 3M

Your income is what is getting you where you are

Someone with 2 luxury cars, a CC membership, expensive activities like horseback riding, a nanny for a SAHM, season tix, and 4 high end vacations a year with a net income of 450k/yr ( 700k eont net you 450 either, more like 4), plus any renovation at a whim is not going to be able to save anywhere close to 250k/yr. I know because we make the same amount, and dont nearly spend so ostentatiously.

I highly doubt that this poster has saved 3M in the last 10 years with that kind of drunken spending. More bullsh!t like 90% of what is proclaimed on this site.

Next.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're probably an example of what you're talking about. My H makes around $700k, I'm a SAHM with a part time nanny, we live in a cute house in a close in neighborhood, we have two luxury cars in the drive way (~50k and 85K), we have season tickets at the Lincoln Center, we have three kids who are in a bunch of expensive activities like horseback riding, private tennis lessons, we belong to a CC, and we go on 4 great week long trips a year plus long weekends here and there.

Our secret is that we don't have any debt so our income goes pretty far. We've managed to save $3M in the last ten years. We bought our house years ago before the bubble so we didn't pay the premium that people pay now. Then when my H's company went public, we sold some stock and paid off all our debt including the mortgage.

Because we're saving so much we feel like it's ok to splurge now and then, such as on the cars, the trips, the renovation projects we've taken on (paid 40k to repave our drive way last year, we're finishing out basement this year, turning our garage into an apartment, etc.)

No, you are not. You aren't in the same HHI range as 95% of the people on this thread. You are just rich people that like to buy rich people stuff with your rich people money. Which is all fine, but your post is really a non-sequitor, the purpose of which was to humblebrag.

The point is, our neighbors probably wonder how we can afford the house and still travel like we do or fund our renovations. I’ve heard comments from them like “oh just wanted to see the million dollar driveway.”

My point to OP is that 1.) we bought young and never really wasted money on rent and 2.) we paid off the mortgage very early on so didn’t waste much money on interest.

Your Income is 700k even after taxes that's at least 350k you can live off of 100k and save the rest 250k a year you would have alot more than 3M

Your income is what is getting you where you are

Someone with 2 luxury cars, a CC membership, expensive activities like horseback riding, a nanny for a SAHM, season tix, and 4 high end vacations a year with a net income of 450k/yr ( 700k eont net you 450 either, more like 4), plus any renovation at a whim is not going to be able to save anywhere close to 250k/yr. I know because we make the same amount, and dont nearly spend so ostentatiously.

I highly doubt that this poster has saved 3M in the last 10 years with that kind of drunken spending. More bullsh!t like 90% of what is proclaimed on this site.

Next.

And yet it is true. We’ve had a couple equity grants, which we’ve sold for extra cash. That’s helped.

I don’t know what to tell you. DH makes a base income of 300, target bonus is around 400-450. We have a little passive income (no more than 50k).

[Anonymous]

My DH and i used to discuss this about his group of college friends who all ended up in comparable salary ranges in their 30s (~$200k). But one of his buddies was in dire financial straights compared to the rest of us - overstretched on houses, had to declare bankruptcy in the recession, having to sell things to bridge gaps, etc. The rest of us were comfortably upper middle class without financial stress. The financially stretched buddy was buying the same houses and cars as the rest of us, on the same salary as his buddies, but the differences?

- college debt. The rest of us had parents who paid for our (in-state) tuition
- "beginning of life help". Again, the rest of us had parents who were upper middle class themselves and helped us with things like: down payments on the first super cheap apartment in a small town that appreciated nicely, while DH's buddy paid rent for 8 years; maybe they had a first car that their parents bought them in college.
- wives who worked. This seems like a "duh", but i don't know if this friend got it at first. Another of DH's buddies wives worked very part time in a non-profit, but she probably earned $50k -- which i know her DH always said made things that little bit more comfortable in their household. I'm an attorney and was making biglaw money at 27. But DH's buddy saw it as a bunch of his buddies and him earned the same, so he spent the same as them. After about 10 years of this (and bankruptcy) he finally clued in when he mentioned it would be nice if his DW worked, and it sure would take some pressure off their HHI.

So comparable incomes, but 20 years later, that friend could never get ahead because he was always spending everything he had. While the rest of us started ahead, and thus were saving early, which meant we had more cushion to spend and still save as the years went on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're probably an example of what you're talking about. My H makes around $700k, I'm a SAHM with a part time nanny, we live in a cute house in a close in neighborhood, we have two luxury cars in the drive way (~50k and 85K), we have season tickets at the Lincoln Center, we have three kids who are in a bunch of expensive activities like horseback riding, private tennis lessons, we belong to a CC, and we go on 4 great week long trips a year plus long weekends here and there.

Our secret is that we don't have any debt so our income goes pretty far. We've managed to save $3M in the last ten years. We bought our house years ago before the bubble so we didn't pay the premium that people pay now. Then when my H's company went public, we sold some stock and paid off all our debt including the mortgage.

Because we're saving so much we feel like it's ok to splurge now and then, such as on the cars, the trips, the renovation projects we've taken on (paid 40k to repave our drive way last year, we're finishing out basement this year, turning our garage into an apartment, etc.)

No, you are not. You aren't in the same HHI range as 95% of the people on this thread. You are just rich people that like to buy rich people stuff with your rich people money. Which is all fine, but your post is really a non-sequitor, the purpose of which was to humblebrag.

The point is, our neighbors probably wonder how we can afford the house and still travel like we do or fund our renovations. I’ve heard comments from them like “oh just wanted to see the million dollar driveway.”

My point to OP is that 1.) we bought young and never really wasted money on rent and 2.) we paid off the mortgage very early on so didn’t waste much money on interest.

Your Income is 700k even after taxes that's at least 350k you can live off of 100k and save the rest 250k a year you would have alot more than 3M

Your income is what is getting you where you are

Someone with 2 luxury cars, a CC membership, expensive activities like horseback riding, a nanny for a SAHM, season tix, and 4 high end vacations a year with a net income of 450k/yr ( 700k eont net you 450 either, more like 4), plus any renovation at a whim is not going to be able to save anywhere close to 250k/yr. I know because we make the same amount, and dont nearly spend so ostentatiously.

I highly doubt that this poster has saved 3M in the last 10 years with that kind of drunken spending. More bullsh!t like 90% of what is proclaimed on this site.

Next.

And yet it is true. We’ve had a couple equity grants, which we’ve sold for extra cash. That’s helped.

I don’t know what to tell you. DH makes a base income of 300, target bonus is around 400-450. We have a little passive income (no more than 50k).

Yup. Uh-huh

[Anonymous]

Most people are lying OP, open your ears and actually listen to them when they talk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
It's you not investing in the stock market.

Op - I invest a lot between a maxed out 401k (IRS max not co match) plus another brokerage acct but I never feel comfortable pulling $ out of brokerage to buy things.

It's called dividends, my dear. You don't touch the capital.
It's amazing to me how many supposedly intelligent and capable people earning decent salaries are out there, not knowing how to leverage their money.

I'm not OP but I reinvest my dividends, I don't use them to buy consumer goods. I'm trying to build wealth, not spend it.

What are you building it for? Why not enjoy it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH and i used to discuss this about his group of college friends who all ended up in comparable salary ranges in their 30s (~$200k). But one of his buddies was in dire financial straights compared to the rest of us - overstretched on houses, had to declare bankruptcy in the recession, having to sell things to bridge gaps, etc. The rest of us were comfortably upper middle class without financial stress. The financially stretched buddy was buying the same houses and cars as the rest of us, on the same salary as his buddies, but the differences?

- college debt. The rest of us had parents who paid for our (in-state) tuition
- "beginning of life help". Again, the rest of us had parents who were upper middle class themselves and helped us with things like: down payments on the first super cheap apartment in a small town that appreciated nicely, while DH's buddy paid rent for 8 years; maybe they had a first car that their parents bought them in college.
- wives who worked. This seems like a "duh", but i don't know if this friend got it at first. Another of DH's buddies wives worked very part time in a non-profit, but she probably earned $50k -- which i know her DH always said made things that little bit more comfortable in their household. I'm an attorney and was making biglaw money at 27. But DH's buddy saw it as a bunch of his buddies and him earned the same, so he spent the same as them. After about 10 years of this (and bankruptcy) he finally clued in when he mentioned it would be nice if his DW worked, and it sure would take some pressure off their HHI.

So comparable incomes, but 20 years later, that friend could never get ahead because he was always spending everything he had. While the rest of us started ahead, and thus were saving early, which meant we had more cushion to spend and still save as the years went on.

This reminds me of the recent article about how White American households have so much more wealth than Black American households with the same income. It is a HUGE advantage to start with no debt, help with a downpayment, a safety net in case things go terribly wrong, etc.

https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2017/09/18/upshot/black-white-wealth-gap-perceptions.html