Would you do IVF for a third child?

[Anonymous]

PP, curious if FET cycle worked

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just started an FET cycle today for a 3rd child. Both of our prior daughters were IVF, FET babies. We were blessed with an amazing abundance of embryos during our full IVF cycle for #2. So, having a third was always in our mind once we were ready... DC2 is now 2.5 years old.

Unfortunately, our insurance no longer covers any expense. So, we were struck by that. But, we decided to pay OOP for atleast one or two FETs. It is an unanticipated expense that will impact other financial decisions this year but one we are willing to take to see whether our embryos are our 3rd child.

I'm not sure we would have started again if we didn't have the embryos given the added expense and our content with our lovely daughters and their future. This is such a personal decision with so many factors to consider. Good luck!

Did your FET work?

[Anonymous]

Yes I did IVF for our third child! We had no frozen embryos and it took us three rounds of IVF to conceive her, but I’m thrilled that we did. If you and your husband want three children, and you have the financial resources to do it, then go for it. You won’t regret at least trying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes I did IVF for our third child! We had no frozen embryos and it took us three rounds of IVF to conceive her, but I’m thrilled that we did. If you and your husband want three children, and you have the financial resources to do it, then go for it. You won’t regret at least trying.

did you have insurance?

[Anonymous]

PP here-for DC #1, we did SG’s Shared Risk program. We did two rounds and it cost us about $30,000 out of pocket. No frozen embryos. For DC #2, my husband specifically took a job with the Federal Government to get health insurance (there were three insurers that offered coverage for IVF at the time). We got lucky and only had to do one round of IVF, which only cost us $5,000 out of pocket. For DC #3, we found out that no Federal Government insurance company would cover IVF so we did one round of IVF before our insurance ran out. It didn’t work. Then we paid for two more rounds of IVF out of pocket (though we did get a small discount using Artna’s SG discount rate). On the third round, IVF worked and resulted in DC #3. Those three rounds cost us about $30,000. So all in all, 6 rounds of IVF, two covered by insurance, and our out of pocket expenses were about $65,000.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here-for DC #1, we did SG’s Shared Risk program. We did two rounds and it cost us about $30,000 out of pocket. No frozen embryos. For DC #2, my husband specifically took a job with the Federal Government to get health insurance (there were three insurers that offered coverage for IVF at the time). We got lucky and only had to do one round of IVF, which only cost us $5,000 out of pocket. For DC #3, we found out that no Federal Government insurance company would cover IVF so we did one round of IVF before our insurance ran out. It didn’t work. Then we paid for two more rounds of IVF out of pocket (though we did get a small discount using Artna’s SG discount rate). On the third round, IVF worked and resulted in DC #3. Those three rounds cost us about $30,000. So all in all, 6 rounds of IVF, two covered by insurance, and our out of pocket expenses were about $65,000.

We were fortunate. DC 1 took 3 rounds of IUI and 1 round of IVF- covered by insurance. DC2 was a surprise natural pregnancy while we were waiting to start up our first round of IVF for a second kid. We were prepared to shell out the money for the SG shared risk program though for our second.


If you're lucky enough to have expendible resources to spent $30,000 to conceive a 3rd kid, that is awesome. I could not imagine going in to debt for fertility treatments on a 3rd kid though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here-for DC #1, we did SG’s Shared Risk program. We did two rounds and it cost us about $30,000 out of pocket. No frozen embryos. For DC #2, my husband specifically took a job with the Federal Government to get health insurance (there were three insurers that offered coverage for IVF at the time). We got lucky and only had to do one round of IVF, which only cost us $5,000 out of pocket. For DC #3, we found out that no Federal Government insurance company would cover IVF so we did one round of IVF before our insurance ran out. It didn’t work. Then we paid for two more rounds of IVF out of pocket (though we did get a small discount using Artna’s SG discount rate). On the third round, IVF worked and resulted in DC #3. Those three rounds cost us about $30,000. So all in all, 6 rounds of IVF, two covered by insurance, and our out of pocket expenses were about $65,000.

Thanks for sharing! May I ask how old you were when starting DC3 IVF and if you and your husband talked about an end game?

[Anonymous]

I haven't read any of the responses, just the initial question.

I did IVF for all 3 of my kids- all singletons. the third one took the most tries/transfers/procedures etc.

Why is that "selfish"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read any of the responses, just the initial question.

I did IVF for all 3 of my kids- all singletons. the third one took the most tries/transfers/procedures etc.

Why is that "selfish"?

Rationally I know it's not selfish, just thinking of the money and resources needed to get another kid when I guess it could be spent on other things like mortgage, college fund, charity, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read any of the responses, just the initial question.

I did IVF for all 3 of my kids- all singletons. the third one took the most tries/transfers/procedures etc.

Why is that "selfish"?

Rationally I know it's not selfish, just thinking of the money and resources needed to get another kid when I guess it could be spent on other things like mortgage, college fund, charity, etc.

I mean it depends on how much $$ you have to spend - if you can afford it- if you're going to spend $$ on IVF and basically throw away your existing child's college $$ on IVF, then yes, maybe selfish. if you really want a third kid and can afford to pay your mortgage, save for college, AND spend $$ on IVF, then go for it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP here-for DC #1, we did SG’s Shared Risk program. We did two rounds and it cost us about $30,000 out of pocket. No frozen embryos. For DC #2, my husband specifically took a job with the Federal Government to get health insurance (there were three insurers that offered coverage for IVF at the time). We got lucky and only had to do one round of IVF, which only cost us $5,000 out of pocket. For DC #3, we found out that no Federal Government insurance company would cover IVF so we did one round of IVF before our insurance ran out. It didn’t work. Then we paid for two more rounds of IVF out of pocket (though we did get a small discount using Artna’s SG discount rate). On the third round, IVF worked and resulted in DC #3. Those three rounds cost us about $30,000. So all in all, 6 rounds of IVF, two covered by insurance, and our out of pocket expenses were about $65,000.

Thanks for sharing! May I ask how old you were when starting DC3 IVF and if you and your husband talked about an end game?

I was 37 years old when we started DC3. My husband and I never discussed an end game because we both agreed that we were set on having a third child no matter what. We would have spent even more. We actually wanted four children (before we discovered our infertility). You are not being selfish to want a third child. I don’t know your diagnosis or your financial situation, but I can tell you that you aren’t being selfish and you shouldn’t base your decision on fears that you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP here-for DC #1, we did SG’s Shared Risk program. We did two rounds and it cost us about $30,000 out of pocket. No frozen embryos. For DC #2, my husband specifically took a job with the Federal Government to get health insurance (there were three insurers that offered coverage for IVF at the time). We got lucky and only had to do one round of IVF, which only cost us $5,000 out of pocket. For DC #3, we found out that no Federal Government insurance company would cover IVF so we did one round of IVF before our insurance ran out. It didn’t work. Then we paid for two more rounds of IVF out of pocket (though we did get a small discount using Artna’s SG discount rate). On the third round, IVF worked and resulted in DC #3. Those three rounds cost us about $30,000. So all in all, 6 rounds of IVF, two covered by insurance, and our out of pocket expenses were about $65,000.

Thanks for sharing! May I ask how old you were when starting DC3 IVF and if you and your husband talked about an end game?

I was 37 years old when we started DC3. My husband and I never discussed an end game because we both agreed that we were set on having a third child no matter what. We would have spent even more. We actually wanted four children (before we discovered our infertility). You are not being selfish to want a third child. I don’t know your diagnosis or your financial situation, but I can tell you that you aren’t being selfish and you shouldn’t base your decision on fears that you are. [/quote

Thanks-- may I ask how that turned out? Do you have 3 kids now and how many rounds of IVF did you need to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP here-for DC #1, we did SG’s Shared Risk program. We did two rounds and it cost us about $30,000 out of pocket. No frozen embryos. For DC #2, my husband specifically took a job with the Federal Government to get health insurance (there were three insurers that offered coverage for IVF at the time). We got lucky and only had to do one round of IVF, which only cost us $5,000 out of pocket. For DC #3, we found out that no Federal Government insurance company would cover IVF so we did one round of IVF before our insurance ran out. It didn’t work. Then we paid for two more rounds of IVF out of pocket (though we did get a small discount using Artna’s SG discount rate). On the third round, IVF worked and resulted in DC #3. Those three rounds cost us about $30,000. So all in all, 6 rounds of IVF, two covered by insurance, and our out of pocket expenses were about $65,000.

Thanks for sharing! May I ask how old you were when starting DC3 IVF and if you and your husband talked about an end game?

I was 37 years old when we started DC3. My husband and I never discussed an end game because we both agreed that we were set on having a third child no matter what. We would have spent even more. We actually wanted four children (before we discovered our infertility). You are not being selfish to want a third child. I don’t know your diagnosis or your financial situation, but I can tell you that you aren’t being selfish and you shouldn’t base your decision on fears that you are.

Thanks-- may I ask how that turned out? Do you have 3 kids now and how many rounds of IVF did you need to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP here-for DC #1, we did SG’s Shared Risk program. We did two rounds and it cost us about $30,000 out of pocket. No frozen embryos. For DC #2, my husband specifically took a job with the Federal Government to get health insurance (there were three insurers that offered coverage for IVF at the time). We got lucky and only had to do one round of IVF, which only cost us $5,000 out of pocket. For DC #3, we found out that no Federal Government insurance company would cover IVF so we did one round of IVF before our insurance ran out. It didn’t work. Then we paid for two more rounds of IVF out of pocket (though we did get a small discount using Artna’s SG discount rate). On the third round, IVF worked and resulted in DC #3. Those three rounds cost us about $30,000. So all in all, 6 rounds of IVF, two covered by insurance, and our out of pocket expenses were about $65,000.

Thanks for sharing! May I ask how old you were when starting DC3 IVF and if you and your husband talked about an end game?

I was 37 years old when we started DC3. My husband and I never discussed an end game because we both agreed that we were set on having a third child no matter what. We would have spent even more. We actually wanted four children (before we discovered our infertility). You are not being selfish to want a third child. I don’t know your diagnosis or your financial situation, but I can tell you that you aren’t being selfish and you shouldn’t base your decision on fears that you are.

?

Thanks-- may I ask how that turned out? Do you have 3 kids now and how many rounds of IVF did you need to do

[Anonymous]

2 kids, IVF for both. If we had any frosties, we would definitely go for an FET, but that's not the case. Our youngest is almost 16 months, and while I'd love a 3rd, we're not going to go for it. We've moved from the DC area so clinic options are not great, but also we feel like financially it's better to focus on the two we have. Maybe if I were younger, I'm almost 41. I can't really imagine being pregnant again, I'm tired.