No, he is an asshole because he is looking for reasons to complain about his wife both to her and to their extended family, instead of looking for ways for them to resolve any conflicts between what he prefers and what she prefers. I love fish of all kinds and my husband hates anything even remotely seafood like, but he is respectful of the fact that I like something different, sometimes opts to go to restaurants that serve really great fish even though it means he doesn’t have as many options and will have to smell food he doesn’t care for a while I eat, and he is excited for me when he has work out of town and I tell him that I am making fish for dinner. He might not like fish, but he likes me and wants me to be happy and he’s willing to be a Little bit flexible sometimes to make that happen. In return, I have never cooked fish unless it had at least 24 hours to air the house before he would be home again. Because I like him and I want him to be happy. Her husband is an asshole because he doesn’t like her and he’s picking on her instead of just getting a divorce. |
Wow way to take just one of the relentless stream of criticisms from OP’s DH and blow it up to belittle her experience of never hearing a positive word from her partner. Why did you choose to ignore that aspect of her story, the relentless criticizing in the guise of sharing an opinion? Why did you choose to ignore the complaints about her appearance and the complaints in front of family members? Why did you not ask why DH doesn’t cook if he doesn’t like what she serves? You all must be fun to be married to. |
| DTMF |
OP's examples make OP look bad. She is doing some weird sh*t and expects approval. I would tell my family too if my DH started some bone broth making, some many jokes. |
| These PPs are crazy. Your DH's relentless criticism and negativity are a drag. |
Ha! My husband would probably flip out if I cooked at all, even if it had ghee and whatever. But my husband is awesome. |
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| God what a douche. He sounds awful. |
| Husband issue aside, Ghee is super concentrated fat, please use it sparingly, same for coconut oil. Now, to be fair to your DH, both oils have weird smell. |
| I’m pretty sure this forum is founded on that philosophy. |
I agree. OP, ignore the posters turning this into a diet/food issue. That’s not what this is about. |
No they don’t. You’re just hateful and making bitchy comments on an anonymous Internet forum to feel better about the enormous voids in your own life. Pathetic |
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I have projects and habits that my DH finds curious, strange or even downright annoying (like I insist at 2 am on cleaning out the pantry) and we have different tastes, on occasion. If it affects him in a negative way, he will say so but otherwise he doesn't criticize. He respects and admires the fact that I am a different person than he is, with my own ideas, hobbies, etc. We strive to find things we agree on--movies, restaurants, etc--but we don't criticize each other's choices in such small matters. To do so would erode the affection and respect that is crucial to a successful marriage.
The issue here is not what what OP is eating, wearing, or cooking. It is that her husband has no respect for her, and when respect is gone (and there is contempt, perhaps even?) the marriage is pretty much doomed. |
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He needs to learn to communicate constructively in a way that will make people WANT to change to suit him. Ie, more flies with honey. So I suggest you sit him down and explain this, and say it would be a good idea to go to therapist. |
I really don't like ghee and bone broth. I would make lots of comments if I smelled bone broth at home. Cabbage stinks too. My kids hate coconut oil, so I don't use it. How hard is to find something different to cook with or prepare instead of looking for an offense. |