It's always me who stays home with sick child

Anonymous
I travel for work more than DH, but when I'm in town I have more flexibility for telework than he does. We earn about the same.

So when I'm in town, I tend to do more of the sick days, because I can call into any really important meetings or catch up on stuff at night. It's less of an impact on my job than it would be on his.

But when I'm traveling, or have can't-miss events at work, he's 100% on it. I just have to let him know what those days are. I mark critical days on our joint calendar so he can plan around them.

I wouldn't focus on "fair" so much as "I need to be at work on X, Y and Z days, can you help out if needed?" or "I can only afford to take another 2 days off this year before I'm out of paid leave".
Anonymous
This is one of the reasons I decided to stay home. My husband is a surgeon so not only does he make considerably more money than me, he has an extremely inflexible schedule. Sure he can take off with notice, but he is extremely unlikely to cancel an entire day worth of office visits or cases for a sick kid, or snow day, etc. While my company was very family friendly, ultimately my career (and sanity!) paid the price as I was always trying to keep up. I should say I didn't quit until our 2nd was a year old and first started Kindergaten. Between sick days and days off through the public school year it was too much for me alone to do while maintaining my position. Kudos to those who can stay above water in this type of situation, I just wasn't cut out for it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If neither of you wants to take care if your child when she's sick, tell her she'll just have to suck it up and go to school.


LOL Or buy Buckley's. A woman I work with swears by it and insists I get some LOL
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If neither of you wants to take care if your child when she's sick, tell her she'll just have to suck it up and go to school.


LOL Or buy Buckley's. A woman I work with swears by it and insists I get some LOL


Yeah, dose her up and send her off to school. Your and your husband's work attendance is way more impotant than your kid resting when she is ill.
Anonymous
Like others said, we talk about it. I tend to have more flexibility (it's a big reason I've stayed in my current job, even though I don't make as much money) so I usually do more sick days. But there are times when I'm busy or have meetings and I need his help. We talk about it and make a plan. We are lucky that part of this plan can also be calling the grandmothers to check their schedules, which helps for the longer illnesses where there's only a day of actually feeling cruddy and another day of being home but with lots of energy....
Anonymous
I remember being little enough to just want my mom when I was sick. I think maybe moms cover sick days more because they are more of a comfort to a young child. Just my experience.
Anonymous
I'm in the same sitch. No one minds. There are random critical days I can't be off that he will cover.
Anonymous
nanny til they are old enough for school, then parents alternate

Anonymous
I make more but my job is more flexible, so I tend to be the one who stays home when the kids are sick, but it's not always me. I'd say that 75% of the time I do it, especially when it's a last minute thing and my husband does the rest.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If neither of you wants to take care if your child when she's sick, tell her she'll just have to suck it up and go to school.


LOL Or buy Buckley's. A woman I work with swears by it and insists I get some LOL


Yeah, dose her up and send her off to school. Your and your husband's work attendance is way more impotant than your kid resting when she is ill.


You PPs are jerks. You either don't have kids or don't work in a job you'd like to keep. It doesn't mean we don't care about our sick child. How can you not understand this situation?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If neither of you wants to take care if your child when she's sick, tell her she'll just have to suck it up and go to school.


LOL Or buy Buckley's. A woman I work with swears by it and insists I get some LOL


Yeah, dose her up and send her off to school. Your and your husband's work attendance is way more impotant than your kid resting when she is ill.


You PPs are jerks. You either don't have kids or don't work in a job you'd like to keep. It doesn't mean we don't care about our sick child. How can you not understand this situation?


The op came off as trying to make it "fair" or equal in terms of who takes off of work. I saw no evidence of concern about their sick kid's care or which parent is better suited to care for a sick kid. I do have kids and I am usually the one who stays for many reasons, the main one is that I want to take care of my child when she is sick.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:This is one of the reasons I decided to stay home. My husband is a surgeon so not only does he make considerably more money than me, he has an extremely inflexible schedule. Sure he can take off with notice, but he is extremely unlikely to cancel an entire day worth of office visits or cases for a sick kid, or snow day, etc. While my company was very family friendly, ultimately my career (and sanity!) paid the price as I was always trying to keep up. I should say I didn't quit until our 2nd was a year old and first started Kindergaten. Between sick days and days off through the public school year it was too much for me alone to do while maintaining my position. Kudos to those who can stay above water in this type of situation, I just wasn't cut out for it.


Your nanny was unreliable?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:nanny til they are old enough for school, then parents alternate



+1
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If neither of you wants to take care if your child when she's sick, tell her she'll just have to suck it up and go to school.


LOL Or buy Buckley's. A woman I work with swears by it and insists I get some LOL


Yeah, dose her up and send her off to school. Your and your husband's work attendance is way more impotant than your kid resting when she is ill.


You PPs are jerks. You either don't have kids or don't work in a job you'd like to keep. It doesn't mean we don't care about our sick child. How can you not understand this situation?


We just pay more for our childcare than our mortgages. We do understand this situation.
Anonymous
Then let him get fired and live on your income?
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