What are some useful life skills you wish your parents had taught you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wish they'd taught me social skills.
I wish my mother had NOT taught me to be passive-aggressive and a martyr. To unlearn that took a lot of work.
I wish they'd taught me that I was an introvert instead of always yelling at me and/or punishing me for not being outgoing, and how to work around being an introvert.

At least they taught you to be self-aware! That is very valuable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't fuck people unless they are serious about you and want to get married. That's all it is fucking.

This! Almost 40, one child and never been told "I love you." by any man I have dated. My mother has been single since I was a teenager and provided no guidance with regard to relationships with men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oil change for the car (before cars became too computerized and basic parts aren't easily available)....and what the hec I'm looking at underneath the hood.

Changing a flat tire. I've seen it done a few times, not sure I could do it though.

+1 I can add oil, coolant, washer fluid....that's about it. I know what to do to change a tire, but I've never done it. I wish my dad had actually had me do it, rather than just watch.

[Anonymous]

Cooking, driving stick, changing a tire

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of this stuff you would have had no interest in learning as a child or teen!

As a adult, you have to expect to learn new things and pick them up as you go. You don't stop learning just because you are an adult, and if you have that mindset, it is really unhealthy as your brain ages and it limits your sense of discovery and accomplishment in life, even in simple tasks.

Actually, when I was 14, I asked my mom to teach me how to cook. She looked at me like I was from outer space and said that was not needed, successful people don't have to cook. 100 pounds overweight later, with health problems, I have been learning how to cook healthy, from scratch, every single night and am finally losing weight.

I kick myself everytime I think about that day and wonder what my life would have been like if I had be able to learn to feed myself properly and felt like I had "permission" to do so by my authoritarian parents.

Agree that you should never stop learning, but some things are better learned as children or teenagers and can haunt you for years to come if you don't learn them then.

[Anonymous]

Manners

[Anonymous]

How to budget and manage money. It took me a long time to figure that out n my own, especially since I've never had high paying jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Parents divorced when I was young. Mom had a big career and we had a nanny/housekeeper before it was "the norm." She cooked and cleaned so I never had "chores" and find it hard to keep my house organized now. Parents also never took me to the dentist. Odd because we had everything and went to DR regularly. No dentist. I have terrible teeth and have spent a fortune on crowns and bridges.

Yes, to the dentist. I went when I was younger and then we just stopped. I hadn't been in 10 years when I got a terrible tooth ache. Turns out I needed 9 fillings. I also realized that my teeth were getting darker because I was getting regular semi annual cleanings.

I found it odd too since we did not want for anything.

[Anonymous]

How to choose an appropriate romantic partner.

[Anonymous]

A lot of these really expect perfection from parents! Blaming them for weight problems because they didn't teach you to cook (eating nutriciously can involve very little cooking, YouTube can teach you what you want to learn) and teaching money mgmt when they had none!

I do wish my family had been better at expressing and discussing emotions, pretty much any negative feelings or conflict were brushed under the rug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Money management. It should be taught in schools, actually.

Yesterday, I got an e-mail from CVS saying that I sure know how to save using my extra care card, and that I am in the top 8% who save the most using extra care card savings in Washington, DC! I'm surprised that I'm not in the top 2%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A lot of these really expect perfection from parents! Blaming them for weight problems because they didn't teach you to cook (eating nutriciously can involve very little cooking, YouTube can teach you what you want to learn) and teaching money mgmt when they had none!

I do wish my family had been better at expressing and discussing emotions, pretty much any negative feelings or conflict were brushed under the rug.

Things like eating are habits. What we like, what we turn to when stressed, what we think food is "for" (eg, reward) are all learned when young. Relationship skills, self esteem, social behavior also in this category. I'm the PP who posted about makeup and eyebrows; what I learned from my parents' indifference to my appearance was that it's vain and silly to spend time on appearance, not okay to visibly try to look nice (should be effortless), and so on. That did not set me up for success in other areas, like dating and job interviews.

[Anonymous]

How to plunge a toilet. I learned it on You Tube.

[Anonymous]

How to cook
How to be confident
Traits to look for (both good and bad) in a partner
Good dental hygiene
Proper nutrition/exercise. It's damn near impossible for me to turn away from bad habits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another vote for sewing. And maybe some more typical man jobs, like fixing toilets and installing floor tile and stuff.

There are lots of good videos on youtube. I've learned to fix the dishwasher, unclog the bath drain and change filters and light bulbs on my car with videos.