is THIS really what it takes for non-hooked kids to get into HYPS?

[Anonymous]

I honestly don't see how one kid can have the time to do all that?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some of these kids really seem amazing. I guess everyone has different priorities, but to be so focused on a particular school or type of school (ivy league) is something I have never seen outside of DCUM, and I have lawyer and investment banker friends.

Do most of these kids do these things (volunteer, etc) because they think it will help them with college admissions, or is it something that they are genuinely interested in? I'm sure it takes a lot of hard work and a family structure that is very solid/focused.

DD (senior) volunteered at a summer camp for children with special needs last summer and had such a wonderful time. She said the experience changed her life. She's going back this summer despite not needing volunteer hours for anything after graduating. She just loves it.

Mom of kid with SN here- this is so heartwarming. thanks for sharing.

[Anonymous]

I think few realize the bar is this high. Too many parents allow their kids to squander so much of their free time and half-ass their involvement. And too many parents think grades are the end all be all. When everyone has all As due to grade inflation it's up to the parents to cultivate a broad scope of meaningful activities from 7th-12th.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think few realize the bar is this high. Too many parents allow their kids to squander so much of their free time and half-ass their involvement. And too many parents think grades are the end all be all. When everyone has all As due to grade inflation it's up to the parents to cultivate a broad scope of meaningful activities from 7th-12th.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't see how one kid can have the time to do all that?!

Time management. Don't waste days away on video games, iPhone and Netflix?

[Anonymous]

Keep in mind, everyone, that this kind of profile described by OP also gets *rejected* from HYP - they have too many of them.

So there's no need to get anxious. Our children have to do the best they can, and everything will be well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a local kid headed to Harvard in the fall. I'm not going to list his credentials because it would be extremely easy to figure out who he is, and I don't think it is particularly kind to splash a child's details all over the internet.

With all of that said, he absolutely deserves it and nothing he has accomplished is impossible for other kids to take on. It took a lot of hard work on both his part and his parents' but he earned every bit of it, and so could anyone else willing to put in those kind of hours.

EXACTLY what I was getting at. It really comes down to sustained hard work over 4-6 years. It seems nuts to some but nuts to me is letting your kids play video games and pretending a travel sport (your kid isn't very good at in the first place) dominate all their free time.

Obviously not everyone's kid can get into HYPS but if you actually follow this template your kid will end up at a top 25 college or earn a full ride merit award to somewhere respectable.

TBH, if I were obsessed about my kid going to an Ivy, I suppose I would think like this. But I am not. DH attended an Ivy and I attended a non-Ivy T20. We have both done well in life. For that reason, we were fine letting our kids be kids and our teens be teens. They played travel teams because they enjoyed it and it kept them motivated and in shape. Our kids played video games but they also designed them (that looked pretty good on the essay). They were all active in our church because they enjoyed it. Our goal was not to raise some superstar "Ivy or bust" kid. We wanted to raise balanced, happy and well adjusted kids who had the perspective to know that not going to Ivy was not failure. Fortunately, 3 of our 4 kids attended/are attending non-Ivy T20s. Better yet, our oldest is in grad school at HYP . Our middle DD did go to S - but she just lived her life - she did not feel the need to supercharge her activities so they looked good on an app.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:TBH, if I were obsessed about my kid going to an Ivy, I suppose I would think like this. But I am not. DH attended an Ivy and I attended a non-Ivy T20. We have both done well in life. For that reason, we were fine letting our kids be kids and our teens be teens. They played travel teams because they enjoyed it and it kept them motivated and in shape. Our kids played video games but they also designed them (that looked pretty good on the essay). They were all active in our church because they enjoyed it. Our goal was not to raise some superstar "Ivy or bust" kid. We wanted to raise balanced, happy and well adjusted kids who had the perspective to know that not going to Ivy was not failure. Fortunately, 3 of our 4 kids attended/are attending non-Ivy T20s. Better yet, our oldest is in grad school at HYP . Our middle DD did go to S - but she just lived her life - she did not feel the need to supercharge her activities so they looked good on an app.

Little difference in the profiles of HYPS and T20 matriculants. Sounds like you're one of those Type A moms who pretends she's above it all while being just as obsessed with the rat race as Amy Chua.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't see how one kid can have the time to do all that?!

Me either. I'm looking at these and other stats on College Confidential and I have to think many of them are inflated.

[Anonymous]

We all want our kids to be happy wherever they go to college. There are all sorts of kids at Harvard and the other Ivies -- smart jocks and future Wall Streeters as much as the academic superstars. For the "average" bright kid, it doesn't matter so much if they end up at a top SLAC or a great public Ivy. The prestige chasers have an incredibly hard time standing out from the crowd, but the really bright lights are easy to pick out. The top students at the elite private schools and public magnets with great recommendations get in. Those who do the really competitive (free) programs like MIT's Research Science Institute or the State Department's national security language program or the Telluride summer program all get in. Fully a quarter of students at my DC's high school get in to the Ivies+. Some are well rounded but many have gone deep in their areas of interest. They want/benefit from a big cohort of equally strong peers but they can be happy and successful at lots of great colleges. Tunnel vision on HYPS is a recipe for disappointment and bitterness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't see how one kid can have the time to do all that?!

Me either. I'm looking at these and other stats on College Confidential and I have to think many of them are inflated.

Not every activity is all year. But I think if parents were honest and kept track of all the hours in a day their kids wasted they'd be mortified. I'd bet the average teen looks at their iPhone for 4-8 hours a day. Binge watching netflix for hours at a time. Those with cars driving around super inefficiently. My daughter used to burn over an hour of her day to come pick up a change of clothes and a granola bar after school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The state of college admissions today is quite shocking to me. I graduated high school in 2000, and I got accepted at some really impressive schools and so did my peers. My niece graduates from that same high school in a few weeks. Her GPA is higher than mine was PLUS she captained a Varsity team (I did not play a sport, nor did I hold a leadership position in any of my extracurricular clubs). She was rejected from schools in our home state that my friends and I scoffed at. I just can't believe the difference.

I don't understand what drives this phenomenon? Why is it so much harder today than 20 or even 10 years ago? (if it is harder).

The number of international students paying full tuition makes it more competitive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Keep in mind, everyone, that this kind of profile described by OP also gets *rejected* from HYP - they have too many of them.

So there's no need to get anxious. Our children have to do the best they can, and everything will be well.

Kids like in the OP post don't fall further than low T10-T15 (low Ivy).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Looking at the profiles for a youth award. This is what two white girls headed to HYPS each have:

- All As (mostly APs)
- Founder of own charity (one is volunteering, the other is youth fitness related)
- Hundreds of volunteering hours at senior center, hospice, homeless shelter, children's hospital (since middle school)
- Raised tens of thousands of dollars for charity (since middle school, no less!)
- One plays musical instrument at very high level
- One plays individual sport at very high level (not playing in college)
- Two years working in research lab at local university
- Top 3 placements at regional science or writing events (since 9th)
- Handful of clubs at school, always an officer position (if not president)
- Doesn't mention ACT/SAT but I think we can fill in the blank
- Theater or debate or editor of school paper
- Super clean cut; outgoing, type A personality
- Bilingual

I don't know how the masses can ever compete with super kids like this.

So I guess I need to quit my job to arrange all this music/sport/community service activity. Unless she can squeeze this all into her junior year when she gets her license? Or will they offer these programs through SACC? Wish I made enough to afford a driving nanny to do this, but mortgage and all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:TBH, if I were obsessed about my kid going to an Ivy, I suppose I would think like this. But I am not. DH attended an Ivy and I attended a non-Ivy T20. We have both done well in life. For that reason, we were fine letting our kids be kids and our teens be teens. They played travel teams because they enjoyed it and it kept them motivated and in shape. Our kids played video games but they also designed them (that looked pretty good on the essay). They were all active in our church because they enjoyed it. Our goal was not to raise some superstar "Ivy or bust" kid. We wanted to raise balanced, happy and well adjusted kids who had the perspective to know that not going to Ivy was not failure. Fortunately, 3 of our 4 kids attended/are attending non-Ivy T20s. Better yet, our oldest is in grad school at HYP . Our middle DD did go to S - but she just lived her life - she did not feel the need to supercharge her activities so they looked good on an app.

Little difference in the profiles of HYPS and T20 matriculants. Sounds like you're one of those Type A moms who pretends she's above it all while being just as obsessed with the rat race as Amy Chua.

Nope. Nice try though. Nothing Type A about me. There is enough pressure on the kids from peers and the school. When I say that we, as parents, did not obsess about this - trust me, it is true.