DD starts middle school in the fall, and I am scared to death.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I teach middle school. Honestly, in the middle schools this large, there are friends for everyone. Even the "odd" kids get a social group, with very few exceptions.

As a mom, my recommendation is to make your house a social hang out spot if possible. Invite the kids to hang out after school, to sleep over on weekends, to join you when your family goes to dinner. Get to know her friends, so you can share in her stories.

Really? NP here and my 6th grad DS has had a hard time making new friends. He says that kids are so busy getting from class to class that nobody is really socializing and alll of his activities are outside of school. He basically has the same friends he had in elementary school.

That being said, he's very quiet and reserved and a bit shy. So maybe that's why.

I agree with the teacher. My son started 6th grade and made an entire new group of friends. He is a "nerd" and is having a great time in middle school. And yes, we have had the boys over a lot to get to know his new friends. Everybody is busy but there is one night every few weeks everyone or just a couple kids can get together. I found it worth the time to make it a point to have the kids at our house. My 8th grader is leaving middle school with a very nice group of friends he first met in 6th grade too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another mom getting over trauma of middle school in the '80s. Surprisingly, I think maybe it's gotten better. I keep asking other kids and moms in the neighborhood and they all say the transition has been smooth and their kids like it. So there's hope!

This is funny. I heard the same thing everywhere. Looks like only my kids have problems. And then I come here and find many, many kids with the same problems my kids have. Some people have trouble talking about their problems. It IS tough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I teach middle school. Honestly, in the middle schools this large, there are friends for everyone. Even the "odd" kids get a social group, with very few exceptions.

As a mom, my recommendation is to make your house a social hang out spot if possible. Invite the kids to hang out after school, to sleep over on weekends, to join you when your family goes to dinner. Get to know her friends, so you can share in her stories.

Really? NP here and my 6th grad DS has had a hard time making new friends. He says that kids are so busy getting from class to class that nobody is really socializing and alll of his activities are outside of school. He basically has the same friends he had in elementary school.

That being said, he's very quiet and reserved and a bit shy. So maybe that's why.

This is my experience too. Some kids play two sports per season. Many play for two teams. So the parents go from one field to the other from 7am to 7pm on Saturdays and Sundays. And then homework on top of everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't send my kid to that school, especially now that the principal and assistant principal got fired. Reputations are one thing, reality is another.

What are you talking about? No one got fired.

They both got fired. The P is being allowed to resign, the AP is going to be a teacher at the HS.

Wrong at least about the assistant principal, he is moving out of the area due to divorce (ex left area so he is moving to be close to daughter).

Sorry but that's wrong, it's the principal who said he was moving to be near his daughter, but the truth is he was allowed to resign due to his mishandling of the math teacher who molested kids and copped a plea deal. The AP will go back to teaching so he must have had some involvement as well.

Troll.

The principal is leaving the area due to family issues. And there is no way they would let the AP remain in the system if there was misconduct.

Clearly you are not comfortable with the idea that someone else knows more about this than you do.

You don't though since you're a bored 13 year old girl.

So do I have this right? You are a FCC parent but you are okay with a principal who "counseled" the perpetrator to "not be alone with students" rather than taking appropriate action against a teacher who was molesting students? You think it's a coincidence that the principal then all of a sudden wanted to move nearer his daughter? And you think a teacher who had been on an admin track first at the HS and then at the MS suddenly decided he'd like to go back to teaching? I hope you will forgive me if I conclude that your level of rationalization and denial is often seen in The Little City. Have you seen the red signs?

This is an anonymous forum. Anyone can say anything they want. If you have proof that there was a scandal of some sort, you should contact the media.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another mom getting over trauma of middle school in the '80s. Surprisingly, I think maybe it's gotten better. I keep asking other kids and moms in the neighborhood and they all say the transition has been smooth and their kids like it. So there's hope!

This is funny. I heard the same thing everywhere. Looks like only my kids have problems. And then I come here and find many, many kids with the same problems my kids have. Some people have trouble talking about their problems. It IS tough.

Kids are different, parents are different. Just because someone says their kid is doing great and/or likes middle school, doesn't mean the person has trouble talking about their problems. Maybe you aren't even talking about the same things. What some parents might call a problem, others might see as typical adjustment issues. Some kids will struggle socially, but not academically. If you talk to their parents about academics, they will say everything is fine. Other kids, like mine, do great at school and are very happy there, but are sassy, miserable tweens on a hormonal roller coaster at home. In her case, middle school is fine. It is being 12 that sucks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't send my kid to that school, especially now that the principal and assistant principal got fired. Reputations are one thing, reality is another.

What are you talking about? No one got fired.

They both got fired. The P is being allowed to resign, the AP is going to be a teacher at the HS.

Wrong at least about the assistant principal, he is moving out of the area due to divorce (ex left area so he is moving to be close to daughter).

Are you kidding? It was

Sorry but that's wrong, it's the principal who said he was moving to be near his daughter, but the truth is he was allowed to resign due to his mishandling of the math teacher who molested kids and copped a plea deal. The AP will go back to teaching so he must have had some involvement as well.

Troll.

The principal is leaving the area due to family issues. And there is no way they would let the AP remain in the system if there was misconduct.

Clearly you are not comfortable with the idea that someone else knows more about this than you do.

You don't though since you're a bored 13 year old girl.

So do I have this right? You are a FCC parent but you are okay with a principal who "counseled" the perpetrator to "not be alone with students" rather than taking appropriate action against a teacher who was molesting students? You think it's a coincidence that the principal then all of a sudden wanted to move nearer his daughter? And you think a teacher who had been on an admin track first at the HS and then at the MS suddenly decided he'd like to go back to teaching? I hope you will forgive me if I conclude that your level of rationalization and denial is often seen in The Little City. Have you seen the red signs?

This is an anonymous forum. Anyone can say anything they want. If you have proof that there was a scandal of some sort, you should contact the media.

Are you kidding? It was in the paper and on channel 9.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure where you're located OP, as I haven't read the entire thread, but my daughter goes to NBMS & on May 11th we're having our New Parent Transition Meeting (I'm pretty sure all of the middle schools ha've this as well).

This is different than an orientation, this is a more personal new parents sitting down in small groups (4 -5 new parents per group) with 1 or 2 parents who have kids already at the school & we discuss anything you have questions or concerns about... literally anything.

Yes, we discuss academics & after school activities / sports, but we realmy hear questions more so of concern... how will my child fit in? My child is autistic, are there any groups or social clubs geared towards him? How is the school towards bullying? etc.

ANY area that a parent has concerns about, we tell them to come with their questions about them. If we, the parents, can't answer it, the guidance counselors are also there to answer. If you'd rather ask in private, you can do that to.

What I'm saying is that you should call your child's middle school & find out when your meeting is.

I promise you that going to this meeting will help alleviate some of your fears & you'll see that everyone (and I did mean everyone) is in exactly the same boat as you.

When I went to my first meeting as my daughter was entering middle school I was terrified... TERRIFIED!
However, attending the meeting & speaking to parents who are in the trenches right now, really helped ease my concerns & it's the exact reason why I now attend from the other side of the table... to help someone who was just as scared as me, as the wonderful parents before me helped me.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another mom getting over trauma of middle school in the '80s. Surprisingly, I think maybe it's gotten better. I keep asking other kids and moms in the neighborhood and they all say the transition has been smooth and their kids like it. So there's hope!

This is funny. I heard the same thing everywhere. Looks like only my kids have problems. And then I come here and find many, many kids with the same problems my kids have. Some people have trouble talking about their problems. It IS tough.

Kids are different, parents are different. Just because someone says their kid is doing great and/or likes middle school, doesn't mean the person has trouble talking about their problems. Maybe you aren't even talking about the same things. What some parents might call a problem, others might see as typical adjustment issues. Some kids will struggle socially, but not academically. If you talk to their parents about academics, they will say everything is fine. Other kids, like mine, do great at school and are very happy there, but are sassy, miserable tweens on a hormonal roller coaster at home. In her case, middle school is fine. It is being 12 that sucks.

I am the one who wrote: "This is funny ...". I don't know if I am op, pp, np etc. Sorry. but I have to say: You are right. Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure where you're located OP, as I haven't read the entire thread, but my daughter goes to NBMS & on May 11th we're having our New Parent Transition Meeting (I'm pretty sure all of the middle schools ha've this as well).

This is different than an orientation, this is a more personal new parents sitting down in small groups (4 -5 new parents per group) with 1 or 2 parents who have kids already at the school & we discuss anything you have questions or concerns about... literally anything.

Yes, we discuss academics & after school activities / sports, but we realmy hear questions more so of concern... how will my child fit in? My child is autistic, are there any groups or social clubs geared towards him? How is the school towards bullying? etc.

ANY area that a parent has concerns about, we tell them to come with their questions about them. If we, the parents, can't answer it, the guidance counselors are also there to answer. If you'd rather ask in private, you can do that to.

What I'm saying is that you should call your child's middle school & find out when your meeting is.

I promise you that going to this meeting will help alleviate some of your fears & you'll see that everyone (and I did mean everyone) is in exactly the same boat as you.

When I went to my first meeting as my daughter was entering middle school I was terrified... TERRIFIED!
However, attending the meeting & speaking to parents who are in the trenches right now, really helped ease my concerns & it's the exact reason why I now attend from the other side of the table... to help someone who was just as scared as me, as the wonderful parents before me helped me.

Good luck!

Ugh, sorry about all of the typos... I'm on the metro.

[Anonymous]

Your anxiety will be contagious and make her feel as if "cool" is something to strive for. Glasses and being nerdy is trendy and the times are more accepting now, depending on where you live. Give her a chance and do NOT freak her out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't send my kid to that school, especially now that the principal and assistant principal got fired. Reputations are one thing, reality is another.

What are you talking about? No one got fired.

They both got fired. The P is being allowed to resign, the AP is going to be a teacher at the HS.

Wrong at least about the assistant principal, he is moving out of the area due to divorce (ex left area so he is moving to be close to daughter).

Are you kidding? It was

Sorry but that's wrong, it's the principal who said he was moving to be near his daughter, but the truth is he was allowed to resign due to his mishandling of the math teacher who molested kids and copped a plea deal. The AP will go back to teaching so he must have had some involvement as well.

Troll.

The principal is leaving the area due to family issues. And there is no way they would let the AP remain in the system if there was misconduct.

Clearly you are not comfortable with the idea that someone else knows more about this than you do.

You don't though since you're a bored 13 year old girl.

So do I have this right? You are a FCC parent but you are okay with a principal who "counseled" the perpetrator to "not be alone with students" rather than taking appropriate action against a teacher who was molesting students? You think it's a coincidence that the principal then all of a sudden wanted to move nearer his daughter? And you think a teacher who had been on an admin track first at the HS and then at the MS suddenly decided he'd like to go back to teaching? I hope you will forgive me if I conclude that your level of rationalization and denial is often seen in The Little City. Have you seen the red signs?

This is an anonymous forum. Anyone can say anything they want. If you have proof that there was a scandal of some sort, you should contact the media.

Are you kidding? It was in the paper and on channel 9.

You're thick and frankly sound unhinged.

You must be a terrible parent if you would let your child move out of the area and not consider moving closer to where she lives. And teachers return to teaching from admin jobs all the time - the roles are very different and lots of teachers don't enjoy the politics. If you were privy to some secret conversation that suggests otherwise, post the video here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure where you're located OP, as I haven't read the entire thread, but my daughter goes to NBMS & on May 11th we're having our New Parent Transition Meeting (I'm pretty sure all of the middle schools ha've this as well).

This is different than an orientation, this is a more personal new parents sitting down in small groups (4 -5 new parents per group) with 1 or 2 parents who have kids already at the school & we discuss anything you have questions or concerns about... literally anything.

Yes, we discuss academics & after school activities / sports, but we realmy hear questions more so of concern... how will my child fit in? My child is autistic, are there any groups or social clubs geared towards him? How is the school towards bullying? etc.

ANY area that a parent has concerns about, we tell them to come with their questions about them. If we, the parents, can't answer it, the guidance counselors are also there to answer. If you'd rather ask in private, you can do that to.

What I'm saying is that you should call your child's middle school & find out when your meeting is.

I promise you that going to this meeting will help alleviate some of your fears & you'll see that everyone (and I did mean everyone) is in exactly the same boat as you.

When I went to my first meeting as my daughter was entering middle school I was terrified... TERRIFIED!
However, attending the meeting & speaking to parents who are in the trenches right now, really helped ease my concerns & it's the exact reason why I now attend from the other side of the table... to help someone who was just as scared as me, as the wonderful parents before me helped me.

Good luck!

This is a wonderfully informative post, OP.
Find out of your school has something similar.

I didn't want you to miss seeing this, as it's mixed in with all of the side bickering & a pissing contest that has absolutely nothing to do with your original post.

[Anonymous]

I have two through MS and the last about to enter in the fall. Both so far had great experiences - 6th was flexing the wings a bit, changing classes and really loving that first real taste of some independence. 7th was starting to expand their social networks a bit, not automatically having friends by proximity only like in ES but starting to develop your own likes and dislikes. 8th was a first real taste of HS academics, which brought some nostalgia for 7th grade classes.

Yes there will be some periods of drama, and a lot of stuff that you won't even know about anymore, esp with social media and the like. Just keep an open mind and a keen ear and you'll be fine. Oh and your kids will be too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't send my kid to that school, especially now that the principal and assistant principal got fired. Reputations are one thing, reality is another.

What are you talking about? No one got fired.

They both got fired. The P is being allowed to resign, the AP is going to be a teacher at the HS.

Wrong at least about the assistant principal, he is moving out of the area due to divorce (ex left area so he is moving to be close to daughter).

Are you kidding? It was

Sorry but that's wrong, it's the principal who said he was moving to be near his daughter, but the truth is he was allowed to resign due to his mishandling of the math teacher who molested kids and copped a plea deal. The AP will go back to teaching so he must have had some involvement as well.

Troll.

The principal is leaving the area due to family issues. And there is no way they would let the AP remain in the system if there was misconduct.

Clearly you are not comfortable with the idea that someone else knows more about this than you do.

You don't though since you're a bored 13 year old girl.

So do I have this right? You are a FCC parent but you are okay with a principal who "counseled" the perpetrator to "not be alone with students" rather than taking appropriate action against a teacher who was molesting students? You think it's a coincidence that the principal then all of a sudden wanted to move nearer his daughter? And you think a teacher who had been on an admin track first at the HS and then at the MS suddenly decided he'd like to go back to teaching? I hope you will forgive me if I conclude that your level of rationalization and denial is often seen in The Little City. Have you seen the red signs?

This is an anonymous forum. Anyone can say anything they want. If you have proof that there was a scandal of some sort, you should contact the media.

Are you kidding? It was in the paper and on channel 9.

You're thick and frankly sound unhinged. I

You must be a terrible parent if you would let your child move out of the area and not consider moving closer to where she lives. And teachers return to teaching from admin jobs all the time - the roles are very different and lots of teachers don't enjoy the politics. If you were privy to some secret conversation that suggests otherwise, post the video here.

http://www.wusa9.com/mb/news/local/va-teacher-charged-with-sexually-abuse-faced-prior-investigation/414516560

[Anonymous]

OP here, thank you for all the advice! I feel much better.