Feel poor at 300k HHI

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your problem is that you think that you should be swimming in money Scrooge McDuck style on that money. Not reasonable.

Why shouldn't they think that? Half the people on this thread have jumped in to point out that they make 17 times the median income or whatever. Either $300k is rich and you should live like Scrooge McDuck or its middle class for around here. Can't be both.

Right, there's only "average" and "Donald Trump."

Google "upper middle class" and "money management" while you're at it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't forget taxes go up astronomically after 100k.

Oh gee. I feel so awful for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:After tax monthly income should be at least 17k

It's closer to 11 after retirement and insurance.

OP here. We max our 401k and life insurance and monthly take home is about 15k. Employer is one of few that pays full health and life ins.

$15k minus ($4k for house and $4k for nanny and $1k for student loans)= $6k a month That is plenty to fund a nice vacation, eat very well, clothe your family, pay for incidentals and feather your nest a bit.

+1 Stop bemoaning the fixed expenses, sounds like you can afford them and changing childcare arrangements wouldn't be worth the stress. Figure out why you are blowing $6K per month on other things.

You are no where near poor -- you have lucrative careers (and your salaries are likely to grow more), no doubt a comfortable house with a good commute and excellent schools, a nanny to make your lives easier and $6,000 to buy an awful lot of food, clothing, entertainment, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:$15k minus ($4k for house and $4k for nanny and $1k for student loans)= $6k a month That is plenty to fund a nice vacation, eat very well, clothe your family, pay for incidentals and feather your nest a bit.

OP, do you have a handle on your spending? If so, tell us what are you spending your money on?

[Anonymous]

Stop worrying and develop a budget. Then live within it and think about other things. Please.

[Anonymous]

We have a much higher HHI now but used to have a 300k income with 2 kids. We maxed out our 401k but didn't save a whole lot. We bought furniture from Ikea, kept our house simple and paid off our student loans. We still went on a few vacations per year. Florida trips are very affordable and perfect for young families.

Now our kids are older, student loans are paid off, kids are in public school. We save a lot more and go on much nicer vacations.

[Anonymous]

We're in the same boat, OP. It's depressing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your problem is that you think that you should be swimming in money Scrooge McDuck style on that money. Not reasonable.

Why shouldn't they think that? Half the people on this thread have jumped in to point out that they make 17 times the median income or whatever. Either $300k is rich and you should live like Scrooge McDuck or its middle class for around here. Can't be both.

Earning $300k gives them choices. The more choices the higher up the chain. They have far more choices than the above average family in the area. They chose the house budget, they chose the school and chose to take on student loans to fund it, they chose to have a child and they chose to have jobs where they can afford to choose a nanny to make things work better. They wisely chose to fund their eventual retirement. The choose to spend the remaining $6k a month on things that do not include a vacation. They could change many of the above reasons choices and choose to take a nicer vacation, or live in a bigger house (probably with a longer commute and/or lower public school rating). Choices abound.

Problem is they need the tony No Arlington address because of commute and eventually schools. They could 'choose' a cheaper house but compromise on seeing their kid or school quality. Going private saves nothing and wastes money most cases.

I think part of this vitriol is this is a likely dual career working family, both working over 40 hours, and they use money to fill in gaps (nanny, take out, etc). A lot of $200k families have a $100k+ earner with a teacher or wah arrangement so the lower earner becomes household labor to reduce childcare costs etc. it's even more striking for the families earning $200k with a SAHP, they are mug wealthier than a dual income $200k family. And in no Arlington there are a lot of SAHM (see: MONA).

[Anonymous]

The N. Arlingtom SAHM are insufferable and bitter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your problem is that you think that you should be swimming in money Scrooge McDuck style on that money. Not reasonable.

Why shouldn't they think that? Half the people on this thread have jumped in to point out that they make 17 times the median income or whatever. Either $300k is rich and you should live like Scrooge McDuck or its middle class for around here. Can't be both.

Earning $300k gives them choices. The more choices the higher up the chain. They have far more choices than the above average family in the area. They chose the house budget, they chose the school and chose to take on student loans to fund it, they chose to have a child and they chose to have jobs where they can afford to choose a nanny to make things work better. They wisely chose to fund their eventual retirement. The choose to spend the remaining $6k a month on things that do not include a vacation. They could change many of the above reasons choices and choose to take a nicer vacation, or live in a bigger house (probably with a longer commute and/or lower public school rating). Choices abound.

Problem is they need the tony No Arlington address because of commute and eventually schools. They could 'choose' a cheaper house but compromise on seeing their kid or school quality. Going private saves nothing and wastes money most cases.

I think part of this vitriol is this is a likely dual career working family, both working over 40 hours, and they use money to fill in gaps (nanny, take out, etc). A lot of $200k families have a $100k+ earner with a teacher or wah arrangement so the lower earner becomes household labor to reduce childcare costs etc. it's even more striking for the families earning $200k with a SAHP, they are mug wealthier than a dual income $200k family. And in no Arlington there are a lot of SAHM (see: MONA).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a much higher HHI now but used to have a 300k income with 2 kids. We maxed out our 401k but didn't save a whole lot. We bought furniture from Ikea, kept our house simple and paid off our student loans. We still went on a few vacations per year. Florida trips are very affordable and perfect for young families.

Now our kids are older, student loans are paid off, kids are in public school. We save a lot more and go on much nicer vacations.

It is isolating though, because they don't have the SAHM socializing with the neighbors, nor the cash to join the country club or vacation together. Their kids will notice. But they get good schools and short commutes, which hopefully is worth it.

- family in bottom 1/4 of elem school demographics in Arlington

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The N. Arlingtom SAHM are insufferable and bitter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your problem is that you think that you should be swimming in money Scrooge McDuck style on that money. Not reasonable.

Why shouldn't they think that? Half the people on this thread have jumped in to point out that they make 17 times the median income or whatever. Either $300k is rich and you should live like Scrooge McDuck or its middle class for around here. Can't be both.

Earning $300k gives them choices. The more choices the higher up the chain. They have far more choices than the above average family in the area. They chose the house budget, they chose the school and chose to take on student loans to fund it, they chose to have a child and they chose to have jobs where they can afford to choose a nanny to make things work better. They wisely chose to fund their eventual retirement. The choose to spend the remaining $6k a month on things that do not include a vacation. They could change many of the above reasons choices and choose to take a nicer vacation, or live in a bigger house (probably with a longer commute and/or lower public school rating). Choices abound.

Problem is they need the tony No Arlington address because of commute and eventually schools. They could 'choose' a cheaper house but compromise on seeing their kid or school quality. Going private saves nothing and wastes money most cases.

I think part of this vitriol is this is a likely dual career working family, both working over 40 hours, and they use money to fill in gaps (nanny, take out, etc). A lot of $200k families have a $100k+ earner with a teacher or wah arrangement so the lower earner becomes household labor to reduce childcare costs etc. it's even more striking for the families earning $200k with a SAHP, they are mug wealthier than a dual income $200k family. And in no Arlington there are a lot of SAHM (see: MONA).

Realiy? we are working parents and SAHMs always are friendly and seem happy. We don't socialize mostly because DWs don't really have that built in community time when kids are in school, but never felt they were bitter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The student loans and nanny are killing you. You shouldn't have student loans when purchasing a home. The nanny is too expensive. There's 3k a month that could go to savings or having fun. This is why you feel poor.

Having good childcare is much more important than taking luxurious vacations.

[Anonymous]

So you go to Williamsburg for the kids for a couple of years for vacation.Thats pretty cheap - free pre-k VA passes to Busch Gardens for the kids, two annual passes for you around $300) and then stay overnight somewhere a few times. That's what we did when we still had childcare costs. Start throwing the extra money at the loans. You bought too much house for the loans you had and then got a nanny. So you need to ride it out.

[Anonymous]

Op, why can't you do a nanny share??? Obvious fix to reduce your child care costs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're in the same boat, OP. It's depressing.

I would be depressed if I were as clueless and bad with money management as you as well.