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Financial aid resources when your school doesn't offer it
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Anonymous
| We are talking about individual life choices here. Private school is for those who have planned their lives so that they can afford to attend. I believe FA should be reserved for those that simply can't attend even if they try their hardest. Sure, I'd like a bigger house, an updated kitchen, fancy shoes and many of the other things that parents at my child's school have that I simply cannot have right now. As it is, we're proud to pay tuition in full every year plus $$ for the annual fund and auction, it's a TON of $$ for us, but we still have enough $$ for two great vacations every year, and two happy kids (who - attended public through 3rd so that we could afford Middle and HS in private). |
Anonymous
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Truth is, private school is primarily for rich people and in most cases, planning and sacrificing isn't what made them rich.
So the question becomes what worthy non-rich people do the rich people keep the school afloat want to surround their kids with? Powerful people? Talented people (and, if so, what kind of talent -- athletes? scholars? artists?)? Ambitious, hard-working, disciplined people? People of different races/classes/religions/national origins? Different schools have different priorities, including the ones that supply no FA at all. My guess is (does anyone know differently?) that income and assets are used to determine whether families qualify for financial aid and consumption/debt doesn't enter into it unless you have an extraordinary burden for extraordinary reasons and ask for that to be taken into account. In that sense, the affluent overconsumption crowd prices themselves out and/or racks up more debt or liquidates assets. But no one is second-guessing whether you took the right job, paid too much for your education, should have bought in a less expensive area. |
Anonymous
None. Private school tuition is not an entitlement. Also, public interest work is very nice but it was a choice. When you CHOOSE not to go after the high-paying career you don't get to subsequently turn around and whinge that since you're so special and self-sacrificing you are entitled to the things that money could buy - had you only dirtied yourself enough to earn it. You made a life choice and now you're regretting it. Oh well. Maybe you'll teach your children that if they want something expensive, they'll have to actually earn the money to pay for it. |
Anonymous
|
To 12:28 -
If you take your argument to its logical conclusion, are you saying that anyone who makes a career choice (or has it made for the because of lack of effort) that does not earn enough for private school tuition is simply shut out? We often hear the refrain on this board about how someone chose social work or something so it is not fair that their kids are shut out of privates without an aid award even if their HHI (because of DH) is $175K or $200K. In what circumstances should aid be available? Are there any? Separate question: if, as other posters have said, aid is formulaic and it doesn't examine the "back story," is that appropriate? Should there be a cap on how much you earn above which you are ineligible, regardless of circumstances? Should there be a sliding tuition scale at these schools based on income instead of financail aid? If that were put in place, it would put $200K family that does not apply for aid in exactly the same position as the $200K family that does under the current system. Is that more fair? |
Anonymous
Congratulations, you have understood me correctly. Private school tuition is as much a luxury as imported wine & cheese, pink diamonds, private yachts, and a summer home in Nantucket. People who fail to understand this have failed to understand the fundamental difference between wants and needs, luxuries and necessities. Once you have achieved this state of enlightenment, you realize that asking for financial aid is asking for a handout so that you can obtain a luxury for your child. It's not that it's right or wrong for you to do so (ask for a handout), that's simply the choice you've chosen to make. Now that you understand you are asking for a handout, you need to understand that whether or not your child is "deserving" of the handout is really all about something as crass as "does your child out-compete all the other children whose families are asking for handouts?" If your child is a minority, from a gay partners household where one partner is a foreign correspondent and the other is a fireman, your DC speaks a foreign language and excels at sports/art/music/ AND is particularly beautiful then Congratulations. Your child is probably at the top of the most-interesting pile, and therefore more likely to win first dip into the handout bucket. If your child is white, with two straight middle-class white parents who work as lawyers/consultants/GS-whatevers, speaks no languages, has no special talents other than a high WIPPSI, then good luck. No big heaping handouts for you. You are merely a jester auditioning at this court banquet, and you probably don't have an interesting enough song & dance to be invited to stay. |
Anonymous
| I agree. Public education is an entitlement and private education is a luxury. Your child, no matter how precocious, lovely, bright, etc. is not "deserving" of private education anymore than s/he is "deserving" of stay-away summer camps in Vermont, a summer in Europe, or designer clothes. Education obviously adds more value to a child's life (IMO) than the other items, but it is still up to the parents to pay for such things if they so desire. If they cannot and they make more than about $80k, they should not expect a handout. And if they make less than $80k, a handout is still highly unlikely from a purely numbers standpoint. |
Anonymous
| So where is everybody? There is normally a whole contingent of people who argue that they ARE entitled to financial aid when they make between $100K and $250K because otherwise these schools would be full of only rich people's kids and their kids add so much to the mix. |
Anonymous
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How about this difference of opinion:
I don't see it as a handout. That is so negative! My kids see it as paying it forward. We have a High HHI yet get some FA. My kids know this. I believe they will pay back some day what they are getting. In spades. I went to a prestigious college and grad school. The grad school gave me a "handout" as some of you like to call it, despite the fact i could have mortgaged myself or found a job etc. I have more than repaid what they gave me. |
Anonymous
I'm the OP, and this is the exact info I was looking for. So, if you don't mind me asking, with you having a HHI, how was it determined that you qualified? Was it offered through the school, or did you look for FA from outside resources? thanks for the first helpful post. |
Anonymous
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For HHI families - you get the aid through the school.
If your school does not offer aid, you really are SOL. If you go back to the Sidwell link, you would see that Sidwell does offer FA to families with HHI. But as you are experiencing, the school you have fallen in love with does not. |
Anonymous
How is this the exact info you were looking for? PPs have posted that at 200k they were receiving FA from their schools. If you knew that your family required some degree of FA, why would you apply & accept admittance at a school that doesn't offer FA? Oh right, I forgot, the school impressed you. Oy! |
Anonymous
Just curious - do you believe that all children, regardless of race or class are entitled to the same quality public education? Taking your argument to its logical conclusion, children who are born to parents that cannot afford to live in the best zip codes are entitled to a second class education and their parents should make no effort to equalize the playing field for their kids by trying to get them a more competitive education even if it means asking for a hand-out. You know what gets me with the self-righteousness of some of these posts is that I can bet many of the people who are taking the hardest line on these boards are the same ones who would be rushing to drop clothes and food off for the "needy" so that everyone can see how much they care about helping those in need. I wish you would stop just for a second and try to think of need more holistically and more broadly. The issues underlying this thread are multifaceted, but many of these posts do not begin to address the socio-economic realities of the society in which we are living - instead they are stuck within the upper NW Washington DC, Chevy Chase, Bethesda, Potomac, McLean bubble. |
Anonymous
| PP, you write eloquently and with feeling about the unfairness of life. Not all families can "choose" to live in the best zip codes. And not all kids come even close to attending public schools that provide them the kind of education that would open all kinds of doors. If I could make the world fair, I would do it. And I do donate as generously as I can to our school's FA. There simply are not enough resources in either the public or the private schools to enable all kids to attend the schools that would best serve them. So my feeling is that the limited help that exists should go to help those families least able to move/relocate as necessary. It's not that I care less about kids in that middle category of income, it's just that I think those families are in a better position to help themselves. I apologize to you and anyone who took my post as being completely insensitive ... just trying to be pragmatic. |
Anonymous
| What zip code a family lives in is irrelevant if they are sending their kids to private school, except to the extent it is an area with good public schools and it opens up an OOB slot. I am not sure of the point of your rant against McLean, Bethesda, etc. Life is full of choices. Not everyone gets to go to private school just like not everyone gets to drive the car they most want. If I could not afford to send my kid to private school, I would move to somewhere with acceptable schools, even if it mean getting a much smaller house than what I wanted. Not everyone needs to attend TJ. |
Anonymous
| Even if everyone needed to attend TJ, not everyone CAN attend TJ so it is up to parents to figure out alternatives that will provide their kids what they most need. |