Doctor's appointment nightmare

Anonymous
^^^

Not behaving typically does not make the kids special needs
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If all 3 kids are "anxious" maybe it's how you tell them stuff.


PP here with anxiety disorder. It's genetic. Her other kids have it, and she uses extreme language because she has it. It's not a huge mystery, people.

OP already said her other kids do CBT and she'd like to do it for her youngest but can't start yet because of the speech delay. That's totally rational and a good plan -- CBT is the ONLY thing that helped me manage my anxiety (not meds, not lifestyle changes, not pretending anxiety isn't a real health issue like some PPs want to). But you can't expect a preschooler to do it and do it well at 4 years of age. Back off, seriously.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:^^^

Not behaving typically does not make the kids special needs


At 4, and with a speech delay, it's hard to know, but certainly a possibility.
Anonymous
I think you need to have your daughter evaluated for more than speech therapy. Don't delay it will make it worse in the future when you are trying to play catchup.
Anonymous
My dd's haven't had to disrobe since they were babies. And my dd hardly talked in any of her dr's appointments until this year when she turned 7. I don't feel like your dd's behavior is that abnormal at all. Your dr seemed to be having a bad day.
Anonymous
Our almost 4 year old DS clammed up and didn't want to make eye contact at his last check up because he was nervous. Our ped just calmly explained the check up steps to DS, which helped, and just asked how much he usually talks. I think a good ped would know that what you described sounds within the realm of normal even for a kid without speech issues. Hope you guys are feeling better.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Child has a bad day at the doctor's office? Must be autistic.


And you say OP is making a mountain out of a molehill!


Have you parented a kid with an ASD? Do you know what it looks like? I doubt it.

OP's kid's behavior is pretty typical for an ASD. She is 4. She could be on the higher end of the spectrum. If she is, DX until age 8 or so is pretty typical. It's pretty typical to diagnose those kids with a speech delay before age 8 and then with an ASD later. It's also pretty typical for a kid with an ASD to be very functional at home and daycare and school when they are in their routine, but be unable to cope with an unfamiliar, possibly scary situation.

OP's kid could just have a bad day, or OP's kid could be showing signs of Asperger's/HFA/ASD. In any event, the kid is 4. OP's pediatrician is 100% right to keep the diagnosis in mind and to continue to keep that open as a possible diagnosis for this kid.


OP's pediatrician is not qualified to diagnose developmental disorders, especially not in thirty seconds during a yearly appointment.


She's qualified to screen, though, and to indicate that based on her behavior, this child needs further screening. She'd be negligent if she didn't.
Anonymous
If that was the only off visit I wouldn't worry about it. Sounds like your kid wasn't having a great day and maybe the same for the doctor. And to the point about asking a bunch of questions, that doesn't seem so unusual. Our ped would direct questions to our baby young child where clearly they weren't expected to answer.
Anonymous
OP, sorry to hear about your experience. What is the age range of the doctor. I have noticed as some of our doctors get into their 70s, the censoring decreases and the things that come out of their mouth can be so inappropriate it can be funny.

That said, I wouldn't freak with the autism thing. Not saying your child has it, but you implied your kid is healthy as though all kids with autism aren't. Also, my child has HFA and we had it "ruled out" by people top in their field. Actually someone who ruled it out, ruled it right back in a year later.

Our DC had some issues with the pediatrician office so we switched to a new one by 4 or 5. No issues since. Every time I effusively praise the nurse and doctor they say something about my kid being so easy. My kid is easy because they knew how to read cues for anxiety and they adjusted accordingly.
Anonymous
I disagree with your doctor. Nobody, grown or kid, should ever have to endure this treatment at them doctor. Especially for a girl, teaching her she has the right to be touched in a safe way seems very important. More important than a routine exam on a healthy kid that doesn't actually require clothes off.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP, sorry to hear about your experience. What is the age range of the doctor. I have noticed as some of our doctors get into their 70s, the censoring decreases and the things that come out of their mouth can be so inappropriate it can be funny.

That said, I wouldn't freak with the autism thing. Not saying your child has it, but you implied your kid is healthy as though all kids with autism aren't. Also, my child has HFA and we had it "ruled out" by people top in their field. Actually someone who ruled it out, ruled it right back in a year later.

Our DC had some issues with the pediatrician office so we switched to a new one by 4 or 5. No issues since. Every time I effusively praise the nurse and doctor they say something about my kid being so easy. My kid is easy because they knew how to read cues for anxiety and they adjusted accordingly.


Way to be passive-aggressive -- just like the asshole doctor.
Anonymous
Nothing useful gets done at these check-ups. I've skipped 3 in a row for my DC. If I had concerns, by all means I would take him, but then again, maybe not, because if I had concerns, I would make a separate appointment, not rely on these silly check-ups.
Anonymous
OP should get her child evaluated by a developmental pediatrician.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:A lot of kids tend to be anxious in that setting. I think it's the rare little kid that doesn't get anxious at the pediatrician. Stop blaming OP. She could have role played all day with this child but it seems to me this doctor blew it, big time. The comment about autism speaks volumes.


I don't agree. The child's behavior looked like the behavior of a kid with an ASD, per the OP's description. It's sufficiently like an ASD that I was wondering about whether the kid has an ASD and OP is in denial, until she said that it had been ruled out.

On the other hand, my kid was "ruled out" for Asperger's at age 5 and diagnosed with an ASD at age 8. OP's doctor is 100% right to keep that diagnosis in mind.


Taking a big leap there, aren't you?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP should get her child evaluated by a developmental pediatrician.


Child has already been evaluated.
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