progressive schools in DC-for very very bright kid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hello all:
I know some will take this the wrong way but I see this as being what the forum is actually for, being able to ask a question in private that you would feel uncomfortable doing in person.

So here it goes...
My child is very bright, as in tests in the "profoundly gifted" range and the tester actually told me afterward that she had never had a child complete a particular section prior to testing my child. My child is however not the most confident in social situations unless they know the others well. For this reason we opted for a progressive, nurturing education model. We have been at said school for a few years. However I am noticing more and more as the kids age that most in his class aren't very bright. I have had opportunities to help throughout the years in the classrooms. There are some others, of course, at the school that seem intelligent however I am sort of disturbed sometimes by the number that seem really slow or out of it in class. (Not just one person per class) My child likes school for the most part, but has begun staying that the teacher repeats themselves and covers the same material for a really long time. DC plays with older kids at recess because they tend to connect more with their sense of humor I think.
I would like to hear for parents of exceptionally bright children. Please don't put me down for this post. I am trying to figure out what to do with this child. My other children will probably be fine at this school, however I am not sure if another private would be better for the child I have been speaking about. Are there any mainstream privates that cater or can modify work for a profoundly gifted child? Should I just keep them their and wait to change when they are older for high school? We have already been at a couple schools due to family moves so I don't want to jerk this kid from school to school, but we want to be doing what is best for DC.
Any positive, helpful thoughts?

GDS

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to say I am in a very similar situation as the OP. What I think the OP needs to understand is that those other "not bright" children are just normal.
Personally, I don't put much weight on IQ numbers.

Both of my children started to decode and read words starting at age 3 without any pressure from me at all. I always focus on playing. So, at home my 3 year old is sounding out words like "frog" and spelling "poiznis frog" with letter tiles.

Then I go to my 7 year old's class where kids read to me for an hour. Many of those 6 and 7 year olds are struggling with words like "hat" and "this."

I make no judgement against those kids, but as a parent it does concern me that my child is so far ahead of his peers.

My son loves the game Magic the Gathering, but he can't play it with kids in his class, because none of them can read the cards well enough. My son loves to watch Cosmos and talk about the Universe, but most of the kids in his class can't join his conversation. This is why this issue actually is about social development.

My child should be able to be himself, and if he can't play the games he wants or have the conversations he enjoys, because none of his classmates are on the same page as him, then he is not being himself.

I just want the OP to know she is not alone. One problem with progressive education is that they often put up heavy resistance to the idea the differing intellect leads to social isolation. My brother had a similar problem with his own child. His child's school continually insisted that it was more important to match age levels rather than intellectual levels.

Progressive educators can sometimes have a blind-spot when it comes to the social benefits of being with intellectual peers.

Early reading is not necessarily a sign of true genius- it's just a sign of early reading.
Reading is developmental. Some very bright kids will be late readers. Get over yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:GDS, hands down. End of conversation.

This.

Yup

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to say I am in a very similar situation as the OP. What I think the OP needs to understand is that those other "not bright" children are just normal.
Personally, I don't put much weight on IQ numbers.

Both of my children started to decode and read words starting at age 3 without any pressure from me at all. I always focus on playing. So, at home my 3 year old is sounding out words like "frog" and spelling "poiznis frog" with letter tiles.

Then I go to my 7 year old's class where kids read to me for an hour. Many of those 6 and 7 year olds are struggling with words like "hat" and "this."

I make no judgement against those kids, but as a parent it does concern me that my child is so far ahead of his peers.

My son loves the game Magic the Gathering, but he can't play it with kids in his class, because none of them can read the cards well enough. My son loves to watch Cosmos and talk about the Universe, but most of the kids in his class can't join his conversation. This is why this issue actually is about social development.

My child should be able to be himself, and if he can't play the games he wants or have the conversations he enjoys, because none of his classmates are on the same page as him, then he is not being himself.

I just want the OP to know she is not alone. One problem with progressive education is that they often put up heavy resistance to the idea the differing intellect leads to social isolation. My brother had a similar problem with his own child. His child's school continually insisted that it was more important to match age levels rather than intellectual levels.

Progressive educators can sometimes have a blind-spot when it comes to the social benefits of being with intellectual peers.

Early reading is not necessarily a sign of true genius- it's just a sign of early reading.
Reading is developmental. Some very bright kids will be late readers. Get over yourself.

I am not the above poster but early reading is one of the strongest early indicators of high intelligence. Yes, many extremely bright kids do not read early, but kids that do are frequently very bright. Perhaps before you rudely put down other people's opinions you should consider whether you know what you are talking about.

[Anonymous]

OP, it's not cool to put down other people's children.

I have a gifted/learning-disabled child. In the classroom, his work and behavior spans the gamut between cognitively challenged and brilliant. The teachers don't really know how to approach him, and I am looking at what our Montgomery County public school system has to offer: either the regular gifted program or the gifted/learning disabled program, which ever's a better fit.

Be careful how you choose your words and your tone. You don't want to seem dismissive or unkind. Every child has something interesting to offer, and that's not celebrating mediocrity.

Don't label unless you must. Emphasize hard work and effort instead of grades and scores. Every child has to work hard at something, even the profoundly gifted ones - for them it will often be social interaction that's hard work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think CTY is worth it for kids like this (I went and was an RA during college). Not for college admissions purposes, but for social, academic and life purposes. The kids will range from "regular" very bright on up, but there is definitely a peer group of extremely gifted kids that would be difficult to find anywhere else.

CTY's summer camps were so helpful to my son in the late middle school/early high school years. To be honest, I will admit that the vastly improved social experience made returning to his school in the fall painful. It was a stretch for us financially, but absolutely worthwhile.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to say I am in a very similar situation as the OP. What I think the OP needs to understand is that those other "not bright" children are just normal.
Personally, I don't put much weight on IQ numbers.

Both of my children started to decode and read words starting at age 3 without any pressure from me at all. I always focus on playing. So, at home my 3 year old is sounding out words like "frog" and spelling "poiznis frog" with letter tiles.

Then I go to my 7 year old's class where kids read to me for an hour. Many of those 6 and 7 year olds are struggling with words like "hat" and "this."

I make no judgement against those kids, but as a parent it does concern me that my child is so far ahead of his peers.

My son loves the game Magic the Gathering, but he can't play it with kids in his class, because none of them can read the cards well enough. My son loves to watch Cosmos and talk about the Universe, but most of the kids in his class can't join his conversation. This is why this issue actually is about social development.

My child should be able to be himself, and if he can't play the games he wants or have the conversations he enjoys, because none of his classmates are on the same page as him, then he is not being himself.

I just want the OP to know she is not alone. One problem with progressive education is that they often put up heavy resistance to the idea the differing intellect leads to social isolation. My brother had a similar problem with his own child. His child's school continually insisted that it was more important to match age levels rather than intellectual levels.

Progressive educators can sometimes have a blind-spot when it comes to the social benefits of being with intellectual peers.

Early reading is not necessarily a sign of true genius- it's just a sign of early reading.
Reading is developmental. Some very bright kids will be late readers. Get over yourself.

I am not the above poster but early reading is one of the strongest early indicators of high intelligence. Yes, many extremely bright kids do not read early, but kids that do are frequently very bright. Perhaps before you rudely put down other people's opinions you should consider whether you know what you are talking about.

Nope - it's being nice to you to let you know on an anonymous online forum that you are being a bit ridiculous (not the OP). I don't know your kid do its not putting down your kid or any kid.
In some of the richer area public elementary schools up to 80% of the kids are in the 'gifted' classes and reading groups. Odds are your kid is pretty normal.
I have a very bright kid (tests well does well in school) - but not like OP's kid. We adjusted schooling and things for her to make sure she was engaged and happy but I would not in a million years tell her she's ' gifted' (and she's not - she's bright but normal. As she goes to a school with very smart kids she'd be the first to tell you that she's normal).
Just a clue to tone it down for everyone's mental health, happiness and future productivity - especially your kids.

FYI I have a special DD who read very early too (intellectual disabilities).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to say I am in a very similar situation as the OP. What I think the OP needs to understand is that those other "not bright" children are just normal.
Personally, I don't put much weight on IQ numbers.

Both of my children started to decode and read words starting at age 3 without any pressure from me at all. I always focus on playing. So, at home my 3 year old is sounding out words like "frog" and spelling "poiznis frog" with letter tiles.

Then I go to my 7 year old's class where kids read to me for an hour. Many of those 6 and 7 year olds are struggling with words like "hat" and "this."

I make no judgement against those kids, but as a parent it does concern me that my child is so far ahead of his peers.

My son loves the game Magic the Gathering, but he can't play it with kids in his class, because none of them can read the cards well enough. My son loves to watch Cosmos and talk about the Universe, but most of the kids in his class can't join his conversation. This is why this issue actually is about social development.

My child should be able to be himself, and if he can't play the games he wants or have the conversations he enjoys, because none of his classmates are on the same page as him, then he is not being himself.

I just want the OP to know she is not alone. One problem with progressive education is that they often put up heavy resistance to the idea the differing intellect leads to social isolation. My brother had a similar problem with his own child. His child's school continually insisted that it was more important to match age levels rather than intellectual levels.

Progressive educators can sometimes have a blind-spot when it comes to the social benefits of being with intellectual peers.

Early reading is not necessarily a sign of true genius- it's just a sign of early reading.
Reading is developmental. Some very bright kids will be late readers. Get over yourself.

I am not the above poster but early reading is one of the strongest early indicators of high intelligence. Yes, many extremely bright kids do not read early, but kids that do are frequently very bright. Perhaps before you rudely put down other people's opinions you should consider whether you know what you are talking about.

Nope - it's being nice to you to let you know on an anonymous online forum that you are being a bit ridiculous (not the OP). I don't know your kid do its not putting down your kid or any kid.
In some of the richer area public elementary schools up to 80% of the kids are in the 'gifted' classes and reading groups. Odds are your kid is pretty normal.
I have a very bright kid (tests well does well in school) - but not like OP's kid. We adjusted schooling and things for her to make sure she was engaged and happy but I would not in a million years tell her she's ' gifted' (and she's not - she's bright but normal. As she goes to a school with very smart kids she'd be the first to tell you that she's normal).
Just a clue to tone it down for everyone's mental health, happiness and future productivity - especially your kids.

FYI I have a special DD who read very early too (intellectual disabilities).

A very bright child is not "normal." Normal is an average learner (and I don't mean that to be a negative thing). Most people fall in the average range of intelligence, and average does not equate to "very bright." While "very bright" in an IS setting might seem normal (because they tend to only admit "very bright" children), when you look across the spectrum of learning ability and intellect what we define as "below average" "average" "above average" and "superior" normal is going to be average range. Very few IS admit a large percentage of "average" kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to say I am in a very similar situation as the OP. What I think the OP needs to understand is that those other "not bright" children are just normal.
Personally, I don't put much weight on IQ numbers.

Both of my children started to decode and read words starting at age 3 without any pressure from me at all. I always focus on playing. So, at home my 3 year old is sounding out words like "frog" and spelling "poiznis frog" with letter tiles.

Then I go to my 7 year old's class where kids read to me for an hour. Many of those 6 and 7 year olds are struggling with words like "hat" and "this."

I make no judgement against those kids, but as a parent it does concern me that my child is so far ahead of his peers.

My son loves the game Magic the Gathering, but he can't play it with kids in his class, because none of them can read the cards well enough. My son loves to watch Cosmos and talk about the Universe, but most of the kids in his class can't join his conversation. This is why this issue actually is about social development.

My child should be able to be himself, and if he can't play the games he wants or have the conversations he enjoys, because none of his classmates are on the same page as him, then he is not being himself.

I just want the OP to know she is not alone. One problem with progressive education is that they often put up heavy resistance to the idea the differing intellect leads to social isolation. My brother had a similar problem with his own child. His child's school continually insisted that it was more important to match age levels rather than intellectual levels.

Progressive educators can sometimes have a blind-spot when it comes to the social benefits of being with intellectual peers.

Early reading is not necessarily a sign of true genius- it's just a sign of early reading.
Reading is developmental. Some very bright kids will be late readers. Get over yourself.

I am not the above poster but early reading is one of the strongest early indicators of high intelligence. Yes, many extremely bright kids do not read early, but kids that do are frequently very bright. Perhaps before you rudely put down other people's opinions you should consider whether you know what you are talking about.

Nope - it's being nice to you to let you know on an anonymous online forum that you are being a bit ridiculous (not the OP). I don't know your kid do its not putting down your kid or any kid.
In some of the richer area public elementary schools up to 80% of the kids are in the 'gifted' classes and reading groups. Odds are your kid is pretty normal.
I have a very bright kid (tests well does well in school) - but not like OP's kid. We adjusted schooling and things for her to make sure she was engaged and happy but I would not in a million years tell her she's ' gifted' (and she's not - she's bright but normal. As she goes to a school with very smart kids she'd be the first to tell you that she's normal).
Just a clue to tone it down for everyone's mental health, happiness and future productivity - especially your kids.

FYI I have a special DD who read very early too (intellectual disabilities).

A very bright child is not "normal." Normal is an average learner (and I don't mean that to be a negative thing). Most people fall in the average range of intelligence, and average does not equate to "very bright." While "very bright" in an IS setting might seem normal (because they tend to only admit "very bright" children), when you look across the spectrum of learning ability and intellect what we define as "below average" "average" "above average" and "superior" normal is going to be average range. Very few IS admit a large percentage of "average" kids.

13:53 (I think) here
Very bright in this area - and in our circles - is normal.
Plus, there are all different kinds of intelligences and interests.
Husband an I both have phd's and we noticed that those that were told that they were 'special' all of their lives had a much lower rate of finishing school. You know, because things weren't going their way all the time. They were not used to adversity? Or failure or negative feedback. So, when things got unpleasant they wouldn't know how to deal with it (plus they could just be insufferable).
The truly brightest ones finished too fast for any unpleasantness to catch up with them but that's rare.

For kids who are really that bright I'd want to know too because if issues like boredom or even some possible mental health and social issues that the kid might need support for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to say I am in a very similar situation as the OP. What I think the OP needs to understand is that those other "not bright" children are just normal.
Personally, I don't put much weight on IQ numbers.

Both of my children started to decode and read words starting at age 3 without any pressure from me at all. I always focus on playing. So, at home my 3 year old is sounding out words like "frog" and spelling "poiznis frog" with letter tiles.

Then I go to my 7 year old's class where kids read to me for an hour. Many of those 6 and 7 year olds are struggling with words like "hat" and "this."

I make no judgement against those kids, but as a parent it does concern me that my child is so far ahead of his peers.

My son loves the game Magic the Gathering, but he can't play it with kids in his class, because none of them can read the cards well enough. My son loves to watch Cosmos and talk about the Universe, but most of the kids in his class can't join his conversation. This is why this issue actually is about social development.

My child should be able to be himself, and if he can't play the games he wants or have the conversations he enjoys, because none of his classmates are on the same page as him, then he is not being himself.

I just want the OP to know she is not alone. One problem with progressive education is that they often put up heavy resistance to the idea the differing intellect leads to social isolation. My brother had a similar problem with his own child. His child's school continually insisted that it was more important to match age levels rather than intellectual levels.

Progressive educators can sometimes have a blind-spot when it comes to the social benefits of being with intellectual peers.

Early reading is not necessarily a sign of true genius- it's just a sign of early reading.
Reading is developmental. Some very bright kids will be late readers. Get over yourself.

I am not the above poster but early reading is one of the strongest early indicators of high intelligence. Yes, many extremely bright kids do not read early, but kids that do are frequently very bright. Perhaps before you rudely put down other people's opinions you should consider whether you know what you are talking about.

Nope - it's being nice to you to let you know on an anonymous online forum that you are being a bit ridiculous (not the OP). I don't know your kid do its not putting down your kid or any kid.
In some of the richer area public elementary schools up to 80% of the kids are in the 'gifted' classes and reading groups. Odds are your kid is pretty normal.
I have a very bright kid (tests well does well in school) - but not like OP's kid. We adjusted schooling and things for her to make sure she was engaged and happy but I would not in a million years tell her she's ' gifted' (and she's not - she's bright but normal. As she goes to a school with very smart kids she'd be the first to tell you that she's normal).
Just a clue to tone it down for everyone's mental health, happiness and future productivity - especially your kids.

FYI I have a special DD who read very early too (intellectual disabilities).

A very bright child is not "normal." Normal is an average learner (and I don't mean that to be a negative thing). Most people fall in the average range of intelligence, and average does not equate to "very bright." While "very bright" in an IS setting might seem normal (because they tend to only admit "very bright" children), when you look across the spectrum of learning ability and intellect what we define as "below average" "average" "above average" and "superior" normal is going to be average range. Very few IS admit a large percentage of "average" kids.

13:53 (I think) here
Very bright in this area - and in our circles - is normal.
Plus, there are all different kinds of intelligences and interests.
Husband an I both have phd's and we noticed that those that were told that they were 'special' all of their lives had a much lower rate of finishing school. You know, because things weren't going their way all the time. They were not used to adversity? Or failure or negative feedback. So, when things got unpleasant they wouldn't know how to deal with it (plus they could just be insufferable).
The truly brightest ones finished too fast for any unpleasantness to catch up with them but that's rare.

For kids who are really that bright I'd want to know too because if issues like boredom or even some possible mental health and social issues that the kid might need support for.

For kids who are really that bright (like OP's kid seems to be) I'd want to know too because if issues like boredom or there could even be
some possible mental health and social issues that the kid might need support for.
I have heard that GDS can be a good place for a kid like this (and we know one such child who is there).

[Anonymous]

Slight detour comment - boredom can be a really good thing. It is amazing what it will compel children to explore and find interests on their own. A great impetus towards being an independent learner.

[Anonymous]

Can he move up a grade?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Slight detour comment - boredom can be a really good thing. It is amazing what it will compel children to explore and find interests on their own. A great impetus towards being an independent learner.

Crucial point, I think. I sought out what appeared to be the most challenging academic environment for my (as it turns out somewhat perfectionistic) DC. Net result has been constant demands (scholastic and EC) on most of DC's waking hours with very little room/time/energy left over for independent exploration in the HS years. On one level, DC got an excellent education, but it's been a kind of soul-crushing process and if I had to do it all over again, I doubt I would.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Slight detour comment - boredom can be a really good thing. It is amazing what it will compel children to explore and find interests on their own. A great impetus towards being an independent learner.

Crucial point, I think. I sought out what appeared to be the most challenging academic environment for my (as it turns out somewhat perfectionistic) DC. Net result has been constant demands (scholastic and EC) on most of DC's waking hours with very little room/time/energy left over for independent exploration in the HS years. On one level, DC got an excellent education, but it's been a kind of soul-crushing process and if I had to do it all over again, I doubt I would.

That's true sometimes. DH was very bright and left in bad public schools & he didn't even graduate (got his GED).
If you go the boredom route for school you have to not bitch at them for not doing the boring work - because odds are they won't be doing it.
They will do what they want to do.
He did the work for grad school at least, and in his professional life now.

[Anonymous]

GDS