Clueless kids on bus

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Patrols or any other student should report bullying. This behavior is bullying to this girl and will lower her self esteem.

It's hard to see this below, but here is a link to a great presentation at my school on bullying in FCPS.

http://www.fcps.edu/ForestvilleES/2012-13_Events/Forestville%20Parent%20PPT%20revised%20%20July%202012.pdf

I omitted the garbled part, but (1) staff responsibilities, which is what were excerpted, surely are not assumed by safety patrols; and (2) this purported discussion clearly would not fall within the SR&R definition of bullying, in my view.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is not an AAP issue as some have noted. It's just about standing up for other kids, older or younger, who are being hurt, physically or verbally. As part of the anti-bullying campaign in my DCs' school, they have been told to stand up for one another. I think that's what the Patrol was trying to do. I would hope my kids would do the same, stand up for someone who was being harassed. That would make me more proud than my kid being in AAP.

As an adult, when you hear a group of kids making fun of another child, your's or not, do you not feel it's right to put a stop to it? I don't see why it would be a wrong for a 6th grade to do the same to a bunch of 3rd graders, as long as the 6th grader says it tactfully.

OK: Hey, girls, chill out and be nice! We're all students at the same school!

Not OK: Stop that bullying now! She is just as smart as you are and belongs in the AAP class as much as you do!

[Anonymous]

I agree that telling someone you're smarter than her because she's not in AAP is demeaning and offensive, but is it bullying? Is every instance of rude behavior now classified as "bullying"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is bad behavior from two girls on a bus. It is not about AAP vs. GE. My DD was teased because she had glasses.

Mean kids will find a reason no matter what to set themselves apart and above their peers.

We should address this, of course, but not as AAP vs. GE.

NO child should be open to ridicule for any reason - class placement, race, gender, physical build, athleticism, etc. etc. etc. etc.

Yes, AAP kids have no monopoly on being snotty to each other.

[Anonymous]

Just because you see an AAP kid being snotty doesn't mean the two qualities are remotely related. Sounds like you have a chip on your shoulder and therefore are overly sensitive when you see something, like someone who sees an African American kid being disruptive and then goes off on how "they're all like that" and it's their parents fault (exactly what you implied about AAP kids).

[Anonymous]

mean girls are a problem in FCPS no question. That's what the parents, principals and counselors need to sit down with the kids and talk about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:mean girls are a problem in FCPS no question. That's what the parents, principals and counselors need to sit down with the kids and talk about.

It peaks in MS and is not a big issue in HS (at least from what I've heard), although I'm sure there are some mean girls who never change their stripes.

[Anonymous]

I happen to know firsthand a child who is in AAP but is only in AAP bc his parents fought tooth and nail to get him in. I would not be surprised if they even lawyer re uThe child is otherwise a major troublemaker with serious discipline issues. Has had them since he was in daycare when he got kicked out for fighting with other kids. He even has

[Anonymous]

I happen to know firsthand a child who is in AAP but is only in AAP bc his parents fought tooth and nail to get him in. I would not be surprised if they even lawyered up to make it happen. The child is otherwise a major troublemaker otherwise, a bully with serious discipline issues. Has had them since he was in daycare, when he got kicked out for fighting with other kids. He even has physically harmed his mom and screamed in public places that she isn't his mother, implying she is kidnapping him. Really messed up. I have seen him bully other kids and I would hope to god another child or adult would step in if bullying was taking place on the bus.

This is not an AAP kid, but an overly helicoptered child whose parents think he is gifted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I happen to know firsthand a child who is in AAP but is only in AAP bc his parents fought tooth and nail to get him in. I would not be surprised if they even lawyered up to make it happen. The child is otherwise a major troublemaker otherwise, a bully with serious discipline issues. Has had them since he was in daycare, when he got kicked out for fighting with other kids. He even has physically harmed his mom and screamed in public places that she isn't his mother, implying she is kidnapping him. Really messed up. I have seen him bully other kids and I would hope to god another child or adult would step in if bullying was taking place on the bus.

This is not an AAP kid, but an overly helicoptered child whose parents think he is gifted.

Thanks for sharing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my 3rd grade DD in AAP came home today and said that she had the distinct pleasure (not) of getting yelled at by this much larger 6th grade boy in the AAP program who is a safety patrol on the bus. He was mad at them because he heard them discussing the differences between AAP and GenEd classes with another 3rd grader.

She was really upset because the boy wasn't part of the conversation, but interrupted them. The girl in the GenEd class had been telling them repeatedly that there was no difference between GenEd classes and AAP classes and that she was just as smart as they were, if not smarter. When they explained that the AAP classes are for the more academically advanced kids, the boy ordered them to stop talking and "bullying" the other girl.

My DD is just a 3rd grader, and she'd never had such a discussion with another student before, and she certainly never had been loudly reprimanded by a 6th grade patrol leader before. Now she is scared of the boy and doesn't want to get on the bus again. She wanted to know if he was going to report her to school administrators and why she did anything wrong telling the GenEd student that the more advanced kids had been selected for AAP.

Parents of GenEd kids: please stop telling your kids they are "just as smart" as the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, just leading to arguments that aren't very productive.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the GenEd classes at your school and make sure these kids know that there is nothing wrong about being in either a GenEd or an AAP class. And please ask the administration to remind safety patrols that they are there to help maintain order, not take sides on behalf of GenEd students or police what younger children say to one another about how kids are selected for AAP.

FCPS: please don't bend to the pressure to do away with centers or drastically cut back AAP admittance. You would be doing our communities a disservice by pretending that all the kids have exactly the same academic needs or abilities.

OP here. So many things to address here, where to start... First of all, in your entirely unimaginative copy and paste effort, you changed a few key points, bolded above. In the scenario that actually happened, the two girls weren't having a lovely discussion about "the differences between AAP and Gen Ed classes". Nice try, but these two girls were telling the third girl that she wasn't smart enough to be in AAP. Nothing nice about that. They didn't sweetly "explain that the AAP classes are for the more academically advanced classes". If you don't categorize that as bullying, then quite frankly, there is something wrong with you.

And yes, safety patrols are there to "help maintain order". Seeing two kids picking on another and intervening on behalf of the child being bullied is maintaining order. That's one of the things they're taught to do. If the kids had been picking on a child for any other reason, the safety patrols would hopefully have intervened in much the same way. Hopefully it's not your kid being treated this way one of these days. It would be such a shame if the patrol chose to ignore what was going on, wouldn't it? And I'm sure you'd march on down to the school to make the case that someone should have done something.

Again, you weren't there. Unless, of course, you're just the author of a fiction, in which case you can supply however many additional details you'd like and I apologize for not having bought the Cliff Notes sooner.

I don't think it's "bullying" for AAP kids to tell another kid she isn't "smart enough" to be in AAP. I wouldn't necessarily agree with it - AAP testing measures only certain abilities at a particular point in time - but I totally reject your rather transparent effort to create and/or massage a narrative simply because you don't like the fact that FCPS has determined that some kids, and not others, are eligible for AAP programs.

And, if an older patrol told a younger student to stop "bullying" another student in this scenario AND I was the parent of that student AND she felt intimidated by the older student as a result, I might very well march down to the school to complain about the older student's (i.e., your son's) behavior. He can certainly suggest that other kids should be kind to one another, but if he thinks it's his job to boss around younger kids and enforce his own (or, more accurately, your) rules of social interactions, we might have a problem.

You have got to be kidding. You do know that patrols are almost always 6th graders, sometimes 5th? And that they are supposed to intervene when they see someone being picked on? So now it is YOU who sounds like the overprotective helicopter parent, swooping in to protect your snowflake from that big, nasty patrol who was smart enough to pick up on snowflake's nastiness. If I were the parent of one of those girls, and found out that they had been reported and/or reprimanded for this type of behavior, I would be very ashamed and upset to learn that my DD had actually told another child she "wasn't smart". What a truly mean thing to say. I'd be grateful to that patrol for bringing it to my attention and you can bet I'd make sure this kid never spoke that way to anyone again.

It's hysterical how you are the one "massaging this narrative" to spin your own fiction of the "big, mean 6th grade patrol who overstepped his boundaries".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't realize the job description for "safety patrol" includes monitoring the editorial content of conversations of younger students for political correctness. Sign me up!

I'd like to take this seriously, but OP has layered on so much BS and made so many assumptions that it makes that all but impossible. But I'll reconsider when OP reports back that her kid has also laid down the law for the GenEd boys who make fun of the athletic skills of AAP kids on the bus, on the playground, and in the classroom.

OP here. The job description for patrols includes stepping in when students are being bullied. In my son's view, and mine, the one girl was being bullied by the other two. Imagine being told you're not "smart enough" to be in a certain class. I'm proud of him for intervening and telling them to cut it out. And of course he would step in (and has) if he saw bullying going on in any form, including non-athletic kids being bullied by the jocks. Wondering why you assume it would be the AAP kids who aren't athletic though. AAP includes so many children these days that it's hard to believe that old cliche about them not having athletic skills. In most ways, these kids are really no different from those in Gen Ed (which is kind of the point of this whole topic). He's had to speak up for several kids on the bus due to various types of similar behavior. This particular instance, however, was about two AAP girls trying to make another girl feel bad about not being in AAP. And if you and PP don't view that as bullying, then so be it.

It doesn't sound like bullying to me, and if my girls had been berated by a much older boy on a bus I might complain to the school to make sure it doesn't happen again. Your kid should check cross walks, not decide what people say about test results.

Are you really criticizing a kid who had the guts to speak up for another child being teased? The OP's son did exactly what I hope my child would do. Schools would be a better place if everyone stood up against mean kids. (regardless of safety patrol status).

Tell your girls to be nice, and it won't be an issue.

+100

[Anonymous]

Parents of kids should also realize that we're dealing with 8-9yo figuring out who they are and dealing with complex social situations. They're going to say dumb snarky stuff to feel better about themselves. If it's not about AAP, it'll be about something else.

Have some perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my 3rd grade DD in AAP came home today and said that she had the distinct pleasure (not) of getting yelled at by this much larger 6th grade boy in the AAP program who is a safety patrol on the bus. He was mad at them because he heard them discussing the differences between AAP and GenEd classes with another 3rd grader.

She was really upset because the boy wasn't part of the conversation, but interrupted them. The girl in the GenEd class had been telling them repeatedly that there was no difference between GenEd classes and AAP classes and that she was just as smart as they were, if not smarter. When they explained that the AAP classes are for the more academically advanced kids, the boy ordered them to stop talking and "bullying" the other girl.

My DD is just a 3rd grader, and she'd never had such a discussion with another student before, and she certainly never had been loudly reprimanded by a 6th grade patrol leader before. Now she is scared of the boy and doesn't want to get on the bus again. She wanted to know if he was going to report her to school administrators and why she did anything wrong telling the GenEd student that the more advanced kids had been selected for AAP.

Parents of GenEd kids: please stop telling your kids they are "just as smart" as the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, just leading to arguments that aren't very productive.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the GenEd classes at your school and make sure these kids know that there is nothing wrong about being in either a GenEd or an AAP class. And please ask the administration to remind safety patrols that they are there to help maintain order, not take sides on behalf of GenEd students or police what younger children say to one another about how kids are selected for AAP.

FCPS: please don't bend to the pressure to do away with centers or drastically cut back AAP admittance. You would be doing our communities a disservice by pretending that all the kids have exactly the same academic needs or abilities.

OP here. So many things to address here, where to start... First of all, in your entirely unimaginative copy and paste effort, you changed a few key points, bolded above. In the scenario that actually happened, the two girls weren't having a lovely discussion about "the differences between AAP and Gen Ed classes". Nice try, but these two girls were telling the third girl that she wasn't smart enough to be in AAP. Nothing nice about that. They didn't sweetly "explain that the AAP classes are for the more academically advanced classes". If you don't categorize that as bullying, then quite frankly, there is something wrong with you.

And yes, safety patrols are there to "help maintain order". Seeing two kids picking on another and intervening on behalf of the child being bullied is maintaining order. That's one of the things they're taught to do. If the kids had been picking on a child for any other reason, the safety patrols would hopefully have intervened in much the same way. Hopefully it's not your kid being treated this way one of these days. It would be such a shame if the patrol chose to ignore what was going on, wouldn't it? And I'm sure you'd march on down to the school to make the case that someone should have done something.

Again, you weren't there. Unless, of course, you're just the author of a fiction, in which case you can supply however many additional details you'd like and I apologize for not having bought the Cliff Notes sooner.

I don't think it's "bullying" for AAP kids to tell another kid she isn't "smart enough" to be in AAP. I wouldn't necessarily agree with it - AAP testing measures only certain abilities at a particular point in time - but I totally reject your rather transparent effort to create and/or massage a narrative simply because you don't like the fact that FCPS has determined that some kids, and not others, are eligible for AAP programs.

And, if an older patrol told a younger student to stop "bullying" another student in this scenario AND I was the parent of that student AND she felt intimidated by the older student as a result, I might very well march down to the school to complain about the older student's (i.e., your son's) behavior. He can certainly suggest that other kids should be kind to one another, but if he thinks it's his job to boss around younger kids and enforce his own (or, more accurately, your) rules of social interactions, we might have a problem.

You have got to be kidding. You do know that patrols are almost always 6th graders, sometimes 5th? And that they are supposed to intervene when they see someone being picked on? So now it is YOU who sounds like the overprotective helicopter parent, swooping in to protect your snowflake from that big, nasty patrol who was smart enough to pick up on snowflake's nastiness. If I were the parent of one of those girls, and found out that they had been reported and/or reprimanded for this type of behavior, I would be very ashamed and upset to learn that my DD had actually told another child she "wasn't smart". What a truly mean thing to say. I'd be grateful to that patrol for bringing it to my attention and you can bet I'd make sure this kid never spoke that way to anyone again.

It's hysterical how you are the one "massaging this narrative" to spin your own fiction of the "big, mean 6th grade patrol who overstepped his boundaries".

I'm sorry you've become hysterical when someone points out that the OP may be spinning a situation that may or may not have actually occurred for rhetorical purposes. I mean, it's not like she was actually there. I don't know why I can't come up with a competing narrative in which an older GenEd boy goes on off a sixth-grade power trip and tries to intimidate younger girls into silence because he happens to sympathize with one of their classmates. In doing so, I didn't try to bad-mouth all GenEd kids, which can't be said for OP with respect to AAP kids.

By the way, going back to the OP's post, I don't see her claiming that the Mean AAP Girls told the Innocent GenEd Girl she wasn't "smart," but only that they were "smarter" than she was since they got into AAP, and she did not. Like it or not, FCPS determined there was a basis to differentiate among the three girls, and sticking our collective heads in the sand isn't going to change that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Parents of kids should also realize that we're dealing with 8-9yo figuring out who they are and dealing with complex social situations. They're going to say dumb snarky stuff to feel better about themselves. If it's not about AAP, it'll be about something else.

Have some perspective.

Exactly. Enough with the Manichean novellas where the AAP kids are always the villains.