Feeling odd about my DD's money

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure why you are offering to pay for half of high school though, since this will deplete the savings you have put aside for your daughter. You say he continues to make a higher and higher salary (and don't mention whether or not you also have been increasing your own salary), so I'm not sure why he would expect to pay less than agreed on now. Why not just listen to what he is going to say at the meeting instead of going in with a loss? Maybe your ex doesn't mind and doesn't expect you to offer this.

What happens if your ex gets in an accident, becomes disabled, gets fired, etc. Seems to me like he should pay the agreed upon amounts while he is able, while you wisely keep the other funds for your daughter's future or a "just in case" scenario.

[Anonymous]

What example do you want to make for your DD in this situation? Witholding the information is lying.

[Anonymous]

No don't tell him keep saving. Start using the support to go for HS when she starts high school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would you tell HIM about it?

Why on God's green Earth would you ever even think of bringing this up? I would never put my DD's future in jeopardy like that.

You had a moment of madness. Move on.

[Anonymous]

OP,
You're leaving out a huge chunk of the picture. Do you work? Do you have retirement savings? Are you remarried?

[Anonymous]

OMG OP, have him stick to the deal with the tuition! He sounds loaded, and he's making more money and could be paying you more!

[Anonymous]

$7200 a month is a LOT of money your ex paid without any hassle and always on time. Wow. Your child is so lucky! Definitely talk to a lawyer before meeting with your ex.

Personally I think moral values would dictate to be honest about the money and if your ex cared this much about your child to always pay on time etc. he will not say "Oh great all that money will go towards college tuition now!" - it seems much more likely to me that he will say "Wow, good thing you could save that much for our child over the years!" and agree to make sure there's enough left in savings to last your child through their later endeavors.

[Anonymous]

What? Don't tell him! The money he has paid up to now has been for your child to live month to month.What you did with the money is none of his business, unless it was understood that you were going to save it for schooling.
It's similar to 2 people getting same amount, but one saving and the other wasting it away, and now parent giving the one who saved his money less, because he has more because he saved.
Consider it gone and work on the plan for her future! Give it to her when she is 18. It's her money and not HIS.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't mention your savings to him or offer to pay for more schooling than originally agreed. You are doing the right thing in saving the money for HER and your ex seems more than capable of fulfilling his obligations as originally agreed.