How to make my 8 year old feel ok with walking home from school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't offer advice because you and I fundamentally disagree. I think and 8 year old third grade girl is NOT old enough to walk 10 blocks each day on her own. And she's also not old enough to come home to a house that is empty.

I empathize however, with the difficulty in trying to encourage more independence when your child doesn't feel ready.

Sorry, OP, I agree with this poster. It's too dangerous and I don't even know where you live. We didn't even let our daughter walk to high school (there was a bus, but sometimes she wanted to walk) because some patches are trail hidden from view; there's two registered sex offenders living between us and the school; and the rush hour traffic is hideous with a "me first" attitude. A friend of mine was killed while trying to walk her dog on the same route. An 8 year old is a prime target. I think you should listen to your daughter. Unfortunately, we are no longer living in the 50s-70s when it was safer to walk to school.

But that's not the case. Again. Statistically, it is SAFER now than it was in the 50s to the 70s.

[Anonymous]

My thoughts are that you are lazy.
10 blocks is too far.
8 is too young.
And you don't WORK.

Wow

I still pick up my 12 year old.
There is no reason you can't get her. I have never missed a pick up.
Even when I have appts or a funeral in a different town, I am always back on time. If its doubtful, then I have spouse on standby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^^also, what I would worry about is not abduction. What

I would worry about getting hit by a car.

Fuck this OP is lazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My thoughts are that you are lazy.
10 blocks is too far.
8 is too young.
And you don't WORK.

Wow

I still pick up my 12 year old.
There is no reason you can't get her. I have never missed a pick up.
Even when I have appts or a funeral in a different town, I am always back on time. If its doubtful, then I have spouse on standby.

How nice for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't offer advice because you and I fundamentally disagree. I think and 8 year old third grade girl is NOT old enough to walk 10 blocks each day on her own. And she's also not old enough to come home to a house that is empty.

I empathize however, with the difficulty in trying to encourage more independence when your child doesn't feel ready.

Sorry, OP, I agree with this poster. It's too dangerous and I don't even know where you live. We didn't even let our daughter walk to high school (there was a bus, but sometimes she wanted to walk) because some patches are trail hidden from view; there's two registered sex offenders living between us and the school; and the rush hour traffic is hideous with a "me first" attitude. A friend of mine was killed while trying to walk her dog on the same route. An 8 year old is a prime target. I think you should listen to your daughter. Unfortunately, we are no longer living in the 50s-70s when it was safer to walk to school.

But that's not the case. Again. Statistically, it is SAFER now than it was in the 50s to the 70s.

Says who? I have two sets of sex offenders between me and the school (rape sodomy on an ll year old). It is not safer. How old are you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't offer advice because you and I fundamentally disagree. I think and 8 year old third grade girl is NOT old enough to walk 10 blocks each day on her own. And she's also not old enough to come home to a house that is empty.

I empathize however, with the difficulty in trying to encourage more independence when your child doesn't feel ready.

Sorry, OP, I agree with this poster. It's too dangerous and I don't even know where you live. We didn't even let our daughter walk to high school (there was a bus, but sometimes she wanted to walk) because some patches are trail hidden from view; there's two registered sex offenders living between us and the school; and the rush hour traffic is hideous with a "me first" attitude. A friend of mine was killed while trying to walk her dog on the same route. An 8 year old is a prime target. I think you should listen to your daughter. Unfortunately, we are no longer living in the 50s-70s when it was safer to walk to school.

But that's not the case. Again. Statistically, it is SAFER now than it was in the 50s to the 70s.

Says who? I have two sets of sex offenders between me and the school (rape sodomy on an ll year old). It is not safer. How old are you?

Say the crime statistics. Look them up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't offer advice because you and I fundamentally disagree. I think and 8 year old third grade girl is NOT old enough to walk 10 blocks each day on her own. And she's also not old enough to come home to a house that is empty.

I empathize however, with the difficulty in trying to encourage more independence when your child doesn't feel ready.

Sorry, OP, I agree with this poster. It's too dangerous and I don't even know where you live. We didn't even let our daughter walk to high school (there was a bus, but sometimes she wanted to walk) because some patches are trail hidden from view; there's two registered sex offenders living between us and the school; and the rush hour traffic is hideous with a "me first" attitude. A friend of mine was killed while trying to walk her dog on the same route. An 8 year old is a prime target. I think you should listen to your daughter. Unfortunately, we are no longer living in the 50s-70s when it was safer to walk to school.

But that's not the case. Again. Statistically, it is SAFER now than it was in the 50s to the 70s.

Says who? I have two sets of sex offenders between me and the school (rape sodomy on an ll year old). It is not safer. How old are you?

you probably had those as a kid, people were just not aware.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't offer advice because you and I fundamentally disagree. I think and 8 year old third grade girl is NOT old enough to walk 10 blocks each day on her own. And she's also not old enough to come home to a house that is empty.

I empathize however, with the difficulty in trying to encourage more independence when your child doesn't feel ready.

Sorry, OP, I agree with this poster. It's too dangerous and I don't even know where you live. We didn't even let our daughter walk to high school (there was a bus, but sometimes she wanted to walk) because some patches are trail hidden from view; there's two registered sex offenders living between us and the school; and the rush hour traffic is hideous with a "me first" attitude. A friend of mine was killed while trying to walk her dog on the same route. An 8 year old is a prime target. I think you should listen to your daughter. Unfortunately, we are no longer living in the 50s-70s when it was safer to walk to school.

But that's not the case. Again. Statistically, it is SAFER now than it was in the 50s to the 70s.

Says who? I have two sets of sex offenders between me and the school (rape sodomy on an ll year old). It is not safer. How old are you?

I'm 37. (Wait. I think I might be 36. I was born in 76 - you do the math.) So what if you have two known sex offenders between you and your school? You think there were no sex offenders in the olden days? Of course there were - we just didn't force them to register.

And lest you pull the "our mothers let us ride in cars without seatbelts then" card, to that I say "NOT MY MOTHER." I truly thought the car was not capable of starting until all the seats with people in them had buckled seat belts until I was about 5.

[Anonymous]

OP, pick your kid up. Really, that's not asking much from a mom that is actually home.

While my three kids are learning independence too (only once in middle school can they walk with a buddy), ,I too disagree with 8 year olds walking alone that distance.

Also, SHE DOESN'T WANT TO WALK ALONE!! Acknowledge her feelings, she is nervous and that's fine. Walk with her and let her see with you right next to her that the walk is fine and safe, then when she is ready, she will happily do it on her own.

[Anonymous]

I think she can do it. Why not ease her into it by starting with 2 or 3 days/week walking home. Get her an inexpensive cell phone, let her text you if she is scared. Talk to her about what do do if she gets scared, or someone approaches her. See how it goes.

[Anonymous]

I thought it was illegal for an 8 year old to be home one. Am I wrong on that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:http://www.missingkids.com/en_US/documents/nismart2_nonfamily.pdf
DOJ report on nonfamily abducted children.

58,000 cases of non-family abduction? In 1999?

Higher than I would have thought.

I guess if you're the type to vaccinate based on risk analysis, you'd exude some caution about letting your young children walk to school unattended.

That's because the number doesn't mean what you think it means. Non-family abduction means "(1) An episode in which a nonfamily perpetrator takes a child by the use of physical force or threat of bodily harm or detains the child for a substantial period of time (at least 1 hour) in an isolated place by the use of physical force or threat of bodily harm without lawful authority or parental permission, or (2) an episode in which a child younger than 15 or mentally incompetent, and without lawful authority or parental permission, is taken or detained or voluntarily accompanies a nonfamily perpetrator who conceals the child’s whereabouts, demands ransom, or expresses the intention to keep the child permanently."

34,000 of the 58,200 cases (59%) were of children ages 15-17. 47,100 of the 58,200 cases (81%) were of children ages 12-17.

60% of non-family abductions were by people the child knew.

How many "stereotypical kidnappings"? 115.

And the people who live along these 10 blocks, including the sex offenders. Which category do they fall into? I don't think they fall into the stereotypical kidnapping category. The 58,000 figure is more salient and relevant to this conversation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Yes, kindergarteners walked to school by themselves. I was there. Ask anybody aged 45 or older.

And yes, our parents (or, in any case, my parents) had it right, when it comes to walking to school.

The risk of riding around in cars without a carseat is huge. Car seats have caused a tremendous decline in the number of children who die in car accidents. Meanwhile, the benefit of not using a carseat is small.

he risk of smoking is huge. Lung cancer is declining now that much fewer people smoke. Meanwhile, the benefit of smoking is small.

The risk of walking to school is -- well, what is it? Did lots and lots of elementary school kids used to get abducted while walking to and from school? Has the number declined now that children no longer walk anywhere by themselves? If you can find some numbers, I'd love to see them. Meanwhile, the benefit of walking to school is large. Kids get exercise, kids learn independence, kids don't have to have somebody drive them everywhere, and there's less traffic.

1+. About half the kids in my elementary school walked from K on up too (and I am a mere 37 yrs old). And I was here (in Bethesda) back then too. Completely typical.

Also agree that unlike all the other examples of "oh we are so much better parents than our parents," there seems to be zero evidence that walking home a 1/2 mile is detrimental to kids. And the benefits seem clear.

Really? What benefits are those?

[Anonymous]

I don't think age 8 is too young to walk alone or be home alone - as long as their temperament and maturity allow for that. But I would not force her at that age if she felt uncomfortable doing it. To me, that's a sign she's not ready. May be she would get used to it if you started walking her to school in the morning. But I would not force her.

Also, I can't believe people think that a mile is too long for an average 8y.o. to walk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thought it was illegal for an 8 year old to be home one. Am I wrong on that?

Well, it's illegal to leave a 12 year old and younger alone in your home in Fairfax County . . . . Personally, no way I'd let my 8 year old, male or female, walk home from school. NO fucking way. Especially if you have to cross 9 streets or so as it sounds OP's kid would have to do. People drive like maniacs around here and don't see the little ones.