Had an epidural with GW midwives, wondering if they will take me back for #2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that its too bad more midwives aren't willing to just HELP women get through birth, whichever way they need to get through it. Would I love to have a midwife because of their extensive experience, special attention and knowledge of positioning etc? Of course! But am I willing to COMMIT to a natural childbirth (after experiencing an extremely painful 20 hour labor that was made bearable by an epidural) and then feeling like a failure? Absolutely not.

Why can't a midwife just say, "we are going to try and assure that you have the birth you want and if that means an epi then lovely!" Instead of "kind of making fun of you for begging for it" after the fact, as one PP said. This is why the movement gets a bad rap.

I posted earlier, but the MCA midwives are like this. They will do everything they can to minimize intervention, will educate you about the drawbacks of epidurals, and still support you if you choose one and recommend them in cases in which they're indicated.

I think people are confusing the issues here: the OP doesn't want to be judged for choosing an epidural during a long, complicated labor. She shouldn't be. You can be as committed as they come to unmedicated labor and still have a labor in which medication is, in fact, indicated. And if it is, you shouldn't be judged for that.

It's not that hard.

And the GW midwives don't judge you for that. Jeez. They're not judgey at all! A lot of people say Whitney is, but I don't even think she is as judgey as she seems. She's just driven by a set of ideals that frankly, don't get a lot of respect among a lot of medical professionals. She's got a particular point of view. But even she would recommend an epidural for a labor like OP's, or at least extend it as an option.

Except that a doula posted earlier in this thread that some of the GW midwives *do* in fact, judge women who get epidurals. And another poster wrote that one of the midwives jokingly chided a friend who'd ended up with an epidural. I don't know if Whitney in particular is one of them, but multiple people posting that they've either witnessed or heard about some judgment around epidurals coming from *some of* the GW midwives indicates that it does happen.

I don't think the MCA midwives walk on water or anything, I just haven't detected a whiff of judgment about this topic in particular from any of them. People on this board act sometimes as if the GW midwives are the only ones out there, and they're not.

I have heard wonderful things about the MCA MWs - and have heard that they are MUCH more epi-friendly.

I personally (delivered with GW MWs) don't understand why you would see the GW MWs unless you were at least 95% committed to what they preach. They make it very clear that that is their expectation and they won't allow a lot of deviation from the way they want things done. I tell my friends that going with the GW MWs is "Whitney's way or the highway." I am 100% committed to that and okay with Whitney, so it worked out really well for me. But there ARE other options. If you aren't sure GW is for you, then don't go there... save that space for someone who is completely on board. I truly don't get it.

The GW Midwifery program makes it clear that they want people who are committed to natural childbirth--and if that is not what you want, then you definitely shouldn't go there. Of course, things outside of one's control happen, and that means that there are people who need interventions and get them. But if you are going into it thinking "I'm not sure about natural childbirth," then I definitely would not go there. There are plenty of doctors and other midwife practices to choose from that are a better fit.

I knew I wanted to go unmedicated unless absolutely necessary, and it was a great practice for me.

[Anonymous]

Not the OP but I'm in the same positioned and have wondered this myself as we prepare to TTC. Interesting thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that its too bad more midwives aren't willing to just HELP women get through birth, whichever way they need to get through it. Would I love to have a midwife because of their extensive experience, special attention and knowledge of positioning etc? Of course! But am I willing to COMMIT to a natural childbirth (after experiencing an extremely painful 20 hour labor that was made bearable by an epidural) and then feeling like a failure? Absolutely not.

Why can't a midwife just say, "we are going to try and assure that you have the birth you want and if that means an epi then lovely!" Instead of "kind of making fun of you for begging for it" after the fact, as one PP said. This is why the movement gets a bad rap.

I posted earlier, but the MCA midwives are like this. They will do everything they can to minimize intervention, will educate you about the drawbacks of epidurals, and still support you if you choose one and recommend them in cases in which they're indicated.

I think people are confusing the issues here: the OP doesn't want to be judged for choosing an epidural during a long, complicated labor. She shouldn't be. You can be as committed as they come to unmedicated labor and still have a labor in which medication is, in fact, indicated. And if it is, you shouldn't be judged for that.

It's not that hard.

And the GW midwives don't judge you for that. Jeez. They're not judgey at all! A lot of people say Whitney is, but I don't even think she is as judgey as she seems. She's just driven by a set of ideals that frankly, don't get a lot of respect among a lot of medical professionals. She's got a particular point of view. But even she would recommend an epidural for a labor like OP's, or at least extend it as an option.

Except that a doula posted earlier in this thread that some of the GW midwives *do* in fact, judge women who get epidurals. And another poster wrote that one of the midwives jokingly chided a friend who'd ended up with an epidural. I don't know if Whitney in particular is one of them, but multiple people posting that they've either witnessed or heard about some judgment around epidurals coming from *some of* the GW midwives indicates that it does happen.

I don't think the MCA midwives walk on water or anything, I just haven't detected a whiff of judgment about this topic in particular from any of them. People on this board act sometimes as if the GW midwives are the only ones out there, and they're not.

I'm with GW midwives and always feel like I should respond to these threads just to point out that the way they get characterized on these boards and what I have experienced first hand are vastly different. When I was looking for a midwife (MCA is too far for me) it was basically WHC midwives, FHBC, and GW midwives. I wasn't into a homebirth, and I didn't like a few things about the FHBC (namely if you have twins they'll risk you out, and they won't do a breech birth under ANY circumstances, not that I think I'd want to do a breech vaginally, but I liked that GW midwives won't rule it out automatically if you are a good candidate). The WHC midwives have a reputation for being "med-wives" and they have a much higher c section rate than GW. I also like that the GW doctors have clearly become more natural birth friendly since the midwifery practice opened up. GW is going for a "baby friendly" hospital designation, and I liked that. I like their NICU level, it makes me feel pretty comfortable. I was, however, apprehensive about the "wisdom" reputation, especially via these boards. So I asked around on a few parenting list servs, and got several dozen recommendations from real women. Not ONE person with wisdom said anything about being judged, regretting going with them, or having to answer to interrogations about the diet, etc. I even asked if that reputation was deserved and several of them said not at all. I'm only about 26 weeks in, but this has been my experience so far. I expected Whitney to be a raging bitch, but she was kind and calm and nice. I had a natural OB birth with my first, so maybe that gives me street cred or something, but I just think that the truth is, their reputation has a shadow that is bigger than reality. They're a birth practice. they're there to serve you. They have guidelines to help you achieve the birth you say you want. They make it explicit that there are times when an epidural is indicated, indeed, when an epi will prevent a c section. And, they've discussed when they would recommend a c-section. It does happen. They want what's best for you and your baby. They think epidurals are a tool but not something to be used without indication. I get the impression that they approach it like pitocin. If it's necessary, like mom is losing her mind and can't get on top of things even with support, or if labor has dragged on, etc, then they will recommend it. But otherwise, why go with a practice who makes it explicit that they will offer you a drug free child birth if you think you might prefer drugs to play a bigger role in your birth than they suggest? There are dozens of other providers in this city, even hundreds, who will give you that, and many of them are getting better at being high touch and supportive and taking a more nuanced approach to interventions. But a midwife specializes in getting you there without drugs or surgery if that is possible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that its too bad more midwives aren't willing to just HELP women get through birth, whichever way they need to get through it. Would I love to have a midwife because of their extensive experience, special attention and knowledge of positioning etc? Of course! But am I willing to COMMIT to a natural childbirth (after experiencing an extremely painful 20 hour labor that was made bearable by an epidural) and then feeling like a failure? Absolutely not.

Why can't a midwife just say, "we are going to try and assure that you have the birth you want and if that means an epi then lovely!" Instead of "kind of making fun of you for begging for it" after the fact, as one PP said. This is why the movement gets a bad rap.

I posted earlier, but the MCA midwives are like this. They will do everything they can to minimize intervention, will educate you about the drawbacks of epidurals, and still support you if you choose one and recommend them in cases in which they're indicated.

I think people are confusing the issues here: the OP doesn't want to be judged for choosing an epidural during a long, complicated labor. She shouldn't be. You can be as committed as they come to unmedicated labor and still have a labor in which medication is, in fact, indicated. And if it is, you shouldn't be judged for that.

It's not that hard.

And the GW midwives don't judge you for that. Jeez. They're not judgey at all! A lot of people say Whitney is, but I don't even think she is as judgey as she seems. She's just driven by a set of ideals that frankly, don't get a lot of respect among a lot of medical professionals. She's got a particular point of view. But even she would recommend an epidural for a labor like OP's, or at least extend it as an option.

Except that a doula posted earlier in this thread that some of the GW midwives *do* in fact, judge women who get epidurals. And another poster wrote that one of the midwives jokingly chided a friend who'd ended up with an epidural. I don't know if Whitney in particular is one of them, but multiple people posting that they've either witnessed or heard about some judgment around epidurals coming from *some of* the GW midwives indicates that it does happen.

I don't think the MCA midwives walk on water or anything, I just haven't detected a whiff of judgment about this topic in particular from any of them. People on this board act sometimes as if the GW midwives are the only ones out there, and they're not.

I'm with GW midwives and always feel like I should respond to these threads just to point out that the way they get characterized on these boards and what I have experienced first hand are vastly different. When I was looking for a midwife (MCA is too far for me) it was basically WHC midwives, FHBC, and GW midwives. I wasn't into a homebirth, and I didn't like a few things about the FHBC (namely if you have twins they'll risk you out, and they won't do a breech birth under ANY circumstances, not that I think I'd want to do a breech vaginally, but I liked that GW midwives won't rule it out automatically if you are a good candidate). The WHC midwives have a reputation for being "med-wives" and they have a much higher c section rate than GW. I also like that the GW doctors have clearly become more natural birth friendly since the midwifery practice opened up. GW is going for a "baby friendly" hospital designation, and I liked that. I like their NICU level, it makes me feel pretty comfortable. I was, however, apprehensive about the "wisdom" reputation, especially via these boards. So I asked around on a few parenting list servs, and got several dozen recommendations from real women. Not ONE person with wisdom said anything about being judged, regretting going with them, or having to answer to interrogations about the diet, etc. I even asked if that reputation was deserved and several of them said not at all. I'm only about 26 weeks in, but this has been my experience so far. I expected Whitney to be a raging bitch, but she was kind and calm and nice. I had a natural OB birth with my first, so maybe that gives me street cred or something, but I just think that the truth is, their reputation has a shadow that is bigger than reality. They're a birth practice. they're there to serve you. They have guidelines to help you achieve the birth you say you want. They make it explicit that there are times when an epidural is indicated, indeed, when an epi will prevent a c section. And, they've discussed when they would recommend a c-section. It does happen. They want what's best for you and your baby. They think epidurals are a tool but not something to be used without indication. I get the impression that they approach it like pitocin. If it's necessary, like mom is losing her mind and can't get on top of things even with support, or if labor has dragged on, etc, then they will recommend it. But otherwise, why go with a practice who makes it explicit that they will offer you a drug free child birth if you think you might prefer drugs to play a bigger role in your birth than they suggest? There are dozens of other providers in this city, even hundreds, who will give you that, and many of them are getting better at being high touch and supportive and taking a more nuanced approach to interventions. But a midwife specializes in getting you there without drugs or surgery if that is possible.

Couldn't have said it better myself!

[Anonymous]

OP here.

Almost hate to respond as it will likely revive the OB v midwife battle. However I felt that those of you that were thoughtful enough to post helpful responses deserved a follow up.

First, I'd like to clarify that I LOVED delivering with the gw midwives. I truly believed they and the midwifery model of care saved me from what many OBs would have seen as a c section. Especially given the time lapse between my water breaking and delivery. During delivery, I felt like all interventions and possibilities were discussed with me and I felt heard. This is why I want to remain with this practice.

At my appointment, I was told you are our patient and we will do what needs to be done when the time comes (re epi/whatever). In the meantime, we discussed several things I can do to improve my chances of having an unmedicated birth (ie trying in advance to address issues that hindered me during my last delivery.

So in short, I will stay with the midwives at GW and there was no hesitation on their part about overseeing the pregnancy and birth of my second.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Almost hate to respond as it will likely revive the OB v midwife battle. However I felt that those of you that were thoughtful enough to post helpful responses deserved a follow up.

First, I'd like to clarify that I LOVED delivering with the gw midwives. I truly believed they and the midwifery model of care saved me from what many OBs would have seen as a c section. Especially given the time lapse between my water breaking and delivery. During delivery, I felt like all interventions and possibilities were discussed with me and I felt heard. This is why I want to remain with this practice.

At my appointment, I was told you are our patient and we will do what needs to be done when the time comes (re epi/whatever). In the meantime, we discussed several things I can do to improve my chances of having an unmedicated birth (ie trying in advance to address issues that hindered me during my last delivery.

So in short, I will stay with the midwives at GW and there was no hesitation on their part about overseeing the pregnancy and birth of my second.

Thanks for following up, OP. I'm glad to hear you had what sounds like a productive and reassuring first visit with the midwives. All the best for a smooth pregnancy, and delivery!

[dcmom]

Great news, OP!

[Anonymous]

I met with Whitney for a pre-conception consult and went through my first labor with her, which was about 30 hours long, ending in a c-section. She said that after 24 hours of active labor, epidurals are offered and she expressed her approval of my decision to get an epidural when I did. I'm sorry for the PP who had a different experience but I think the GW midwife policy overall is that epidurals are strongly discouraged in the first 24 hours of labor because the women who seek their care want a natural birth and they consider it there job to support you in that. If it's clear you're going well beyond average and need to rest, they would be supportive in that.