Would women be interested in single father of 3 kids?

[Anonymous]

When I was child-free, I was open to dating a guy with kids. 3 would have been too many for me, though - I would have wanted one of my own in the mix and I'm not sure I could personally handle 4 kids at once. it would be chaos.

I have one kid now and I like dating guys with kids, but I'm just as likely to date guys who don't have them. I tend to prefer guys who have one child. And a good relationship with the mom is a must. I have a great relationship with my daughter's dad - very little drama - so I don't want to get involved in someone else's drama. And it's helpful if he makes enough money to support his kids - I don't really make enough to be the breadwinner, and wouldn't want my daughter to suffer financially because mom got married.

I have several single girlfriends who are child-free and happily dating men who have multiple kids of their own. They have decided that they would rather date the great guy and be a stepmom than to try to find someone else and have their own kids. These are decisions you have to make as you approach 40.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, women with their own baggage will not be turned off by a single father with 3 children. However, single women with no children will not be interested.

Umm, wow. Thanks, jackass. My dad was a widower with two children when my mom married him.
Yes, some women would still be interested in a single father. I've dated guys with kids before. My only hesitation to three kids would be that I very much want to experience being pregnant/giving birth, so he would need to be open to more children. And I'd want to know back story on the ex because of potential drama.

So what you're saying, is basically, you're not interested unless the ex-wife is perfect, and he wants more children. Good luck with that, jackass.

I called you a jackass because you said that the only way a woman would be interested in a man with children would be if she had 'baggage.' That isn't always the case.

No, I don't need the ex-wife to be perfect. I said I'd want to know the back story on the ex. A friend of mine has sole custody of his kids because his wife is bat shit crazy and in jail. That would be important information if I were looking to date someone with kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I was child-free, I was open to dating a guy with kids. 3 would have been too many for me, though - I would have wanted one of my own in the mix and I'm not sure I could personally handle 4 kids at once. it would be chaos.

I have one kid now and I like dating guys with kids, but I'm just as likely to date guys who don't have them. I tend to prefer guys who have one child. And a good relationship with the mom is a must. I have a great relationship with my daughter's dad - very little drama - so I don't want to get involved in someone else's drama. And it's helpful if he makes enough money to support his kids - I don't really make enough to be the breadwinner, and wouldn't want my daughter to suffer financially because mom got married.

I have several single girlfriends who are child-free and happily dating men who have multiple kids of their own. They have decided that they would rather date the great guy and be a stepmom than to try to find someone else and have their own kids. These are decisions you have to make as you approach 40.

30 with a child and feel similar. Ex and I have a good thing going and I'm not interested in going into a relationship with a guy who has a tumultuous one with the mother of his kids. I dated a guy my age a year ago and we got along fast because we both enjoyed dating someone who "got it" as far as being parents but also didn't speak negatively of their ex. That's very important to me. Someone who doesn't appreciate the mother of his child wont appreciate me either eventually.

[Anonymous]

not really

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think single young women w/o kids (who expect to have their own biological kids) would not be interested in a divorced man with kid(s).

Single women with kid(s) would be interested in single dads - divorced or widower.

There are also women who are not great catch themselves (older, physically unattractive, in low paying jobs) who would be willing to go for a divorced dad.

Widower dads are more palatable than divorced dads. I think the reason is that women are more amenable to adjusting to not so great guys for the sake of marriage and kids, so there has to be something really wrong with a man for his wife to divorce him. And if ex-wife did not want him - why would another girl want him?

Not PC I know, and not even true in all instances - but by and large true.

Horseshit! My ex was a psycho who ran off with another man - no longer with him - and left me with the kids.

Are you my BIL? Because that's exactly what happened to him. And his ex is on husband #3.

No, I'm not. But statistically speaking, women are more likely than men to initiate a divorce, which tells me there has to be something really wrong with the woman for the man to leave.

So - you are saying that your wife ran away with another man, did not want the kids and so you divorced her...U R right - there was something really wrong with your wife and you have my sympathies ...however - my generalization still stands - a divorced man with kids is not considered a catch for a single childless young woman who wants her own biological children...unless they have their own baggage or you are rich...

The women who will be most interested in you will be single moms...and you should try and find a life partner in that demographic...

If you have been in this forum for any length of time you know that kids are a big strain on relationships...even happy strong relationships...so you need a woman who is a parent herself in your situation.

...and as I also said before it might be a generalization but

[Anonymous]

I dated Redskin player once that had custody of his three. Wasn't an issue as long as he still wanted more kids and could afford more kids and made time for us.

[Anonymous]

My DH has one, and I wouldn't trade my family for the world.

My advice to you is - don't highlight any drama with ex during dating. Once you get serious, if its there, sure be upfront about it, but for dating purposes, don't let people meet your kids until you are serious. I thought very highly of my DH b/c he would NOT let me meet DD for the longest time - he wasn't interested in bringing many people around her, so you really had to stand the test of time. Be a good dad- that is attractive.

Don't discuss drama with the ex until you are serious with your GF; its not something to dump on her early on, but at the same time, don't hide the issues and do bait and switch.

Full disclosure - my DH has had LOTS of drama with ex. We've been able to roll with it. I think its b/c he generally followed the above. 10 years strong.

[Anonymous]

You busy Saturday night? Curvy , educated AA, single mom, 150k.

[Anonymous]

A man taking care of his kids is very sexy to me. Different people like different things. You should not wait to live your life until your kids grow up. That will rob them and you of your joy and you being your true self. Lots of people date with kids. GO OUT AND HAVE FUN!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A man taking care of his kids is very sexy to me. Different people like different things. You should not wait to live your life until your kids grow up. That will rob them and you of your joy and you being your true self. Lots of people date with kids. GO OUT AND HAVE FUN!

I agree

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You busy Saturday night? Curvy , educated AA, single mom, 150k.

No! I want him for my sister. Leggy blonde lawyer. Curvy and over 30. Has waaaayyyy too many nieces and nephews so she is interested in already established older male. May want one of her own.

[Anonymous]

It's not a dealbreaker for me. I think it shows a side of your character to care for 3 kids. I'm separated now with 1 child. Call me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You busy Saturday night? Curvy , educated AA, single mom, 150k.

No! I want him for my sister. Leggy blonde lawyer. Curvy and over 30. Has waaaayyyy too many nieces and nephews so she is interested in already established older male. May want one of her own.

Ladies, there's enough of OP for the both of you.