Parents of Private High School Graduates – was it worth it?

[Anonymous]

Member of old money society who post on DCUM (of all places) about "old money" would be a far shorter book - as this would be considered gauche

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Member of old money society who post on DCUM (of all places) about "old money" would be a far shorter book - as this would be considered gauche

I'm sure you could write the book on gauche, and if you took yourself for an example it would be a very long (and boring) book.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Member of old money society who post on DCUM (of all places) about "old money" would be a far shorter book - as this would be considered gauche

Just trying to help out the bourgies like you. Noblesse oblige and all that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For those in Montgomery County, a not so well understood benefit of private lower school education is diversity. The public lower schools are pretty homogeneous whereas the leading private schools strive for diversity by offering financial aid to a significant number of students. I personally think exposure to a diverse environment is more important at a young age than at any other time.

Our MoCo public is 15% black, 9% Asian, 27% Hispanic, 42% white, and 7% multi-ethnic. It's lunacy to pay for private school just to get diversity when it's available in most publics outside of Bethesda and Potomac.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For those in Montgomery County, a not so well understood benefit of private lower school education is diversity. The public lower schools are pretty homogeneous whereas the leading private schools strive for diversity by offering financial aid to a significant number of students. I personally think exposure to a diverse environment is more important at a young age than at any other time.

Our MoCo public is 15% black, 9% Asian, 27% Hispanic, 42% white, and 7% multi-ethnic. It's lunacy to pay for private school just to get diversity when it's available in most publics outside of Bethesda and Potomac.

As you seem to know, not everyone in MoCo lives in a school district that is as diverse as yours. At the elementary school level I don’t think you can choose among the schools, i.e., you are more or less stuck with your neighborhood school (some of which have little URM population). If someone lives in a non-diverse area of Bethesda or Potomac, I’m not sure that picking up and moving to Gaithersburg, Rockville or Silver Spring to find a diverse elementary school is any less “lunacy” than paying for private school. Moreover, I doubt anyone thinks that enhanced diversity is the ONLY reason for choosing a private school at the elementary level. Smaller class size and teachers that are committed to the students (instead of their unions and pensions) has been mentioned.

Choosing a school for one’s DC is a very personal decision. A tuition bill that might seem daunting to one family may be a minor factor in another family’s decision. Not sure why some seem so intent on “proving” that another family’s personal choice was “lunacy” when they can’t possibly understand that family’s situation.

[Anonymous]

Not either of the above posters, but the oft-repeated claim that private schools offer more diversity than publics is what seems lie "lunacy" to many of us, not private schools per se. Several posters have shown on other threads that even Chevy Chase public schools have lots of poor kids. Private schools may have a handful of 100% scholarship kids with more $80,000 families getting $5,000-$15,000,

We chose private for other good reasons. But c'mon, where diversity is concerned, private schools are bubbles.

Let's not kid ourselves. It's that bubble factor of private schools that actually appeals to many patents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS was accepted to the Top 25 school of his dreams. He would not have been if he had gone to our top rated MOCO public schools.

For me it was worth it. There is nothing I'd rather invest money in than my children.

As for other other benefits? I think the social skills and polish are a real plus.

Lessons? Be prepared for a commitment of time (in addition to $). - private school parents are VERY active in their schools.

What is this polish of which you speak? I ask this seriously. I think there's a good argument to be made that public school kids learn how to deal with a broader range of kids and also to advocate for themselves. The word "polish" suggests ineffable qualities like knowing how to wear rumpled khakis and to butter your bread a bite at a time rather than paving it. But I know you must mean more than these, and I'd be curious to hear your explanation of what "polish" private schools provide.

Hahaha Have you never met anyone with polish?

Hahahah yes, as the descendent of Mayflower passengers, I most certainly have. My question was directed at the first PP, not you, because I was curious to know what *she* thinks private schools provide in the way of polish. I know how to butter my own bread very correctly, thanks for asking, and I'll teach my own kids no matter whether they do public or private. Polish comes from your family -- looks like you're SOL!

Wow people still brag about the Mayflower. I mean after the 60's didn't you realize it is the same as saying i am a descendent of slave owners.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not either of the above posters, but the oft-repeated claim that private schools offer more diversity than publics is what seems lie "lunacy" to many of us, not private schools per se. Several posters have shown on other threads that even Chevy Chase public schools have lots of poor kids. Private schools may have a handful of 100% scholarship kids with more $80,000 families getting $5,000-$15,000,

We chose private for other good reasons. But c'mon, where diversity is concerned, private schools are bubbles.

Let's not kid ourselves. It's that bubble factor of private schools that actually appeals to many patents.

The facts are laid out above - the "Chevy Chase" schools draw from areas that include subsidized housing and the school district is NOT uniformly well to do --MOST elementary schools in the southwestern part of MoCo have fewer than 10% black students - many less than 5%. I don't know of a private school with a lower percentage of black students. Parts of MoCo and NW DC are certainly in the bubble as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not either of the above posters, but the oft-repeated claim that private schools offer more diversity than publics is what seems lie "lunacy" to many of us, not private schools per se. Several posters have shown on other threads that even Chevy Chase public schools have lots of poor kids. Private schools may have a handful of 100% scholarship kids with more $80,000 families getting $5,000-$15,000,

We chose private for other good reasons. But c'mon, where diversity is concerned, private schools are bubbles.

Let's not kid ourselves. It's that bubble factor of private schools that actually appeals to many patents.

The facts are laid out above - the "Chevy Chase" schools draw from areas that include subsidized housing and the school district is NOT uniformly well to do --MOST elementary schools in the southwestern part of MoCo have fewer than 10% black students - many less than 5%. I don't know of a private school with a lower percentage of black students. Parts of MoCo and NW DC are certainly in the bubble as well.

How about Hispanic students? And you've completely ignored the whole SES question.

The biggest problem with your argument, however, is this: just because SW MOCO is not diverse, that in no way means that private schools ARE diverse in all the usual meanings of the word. That's like bragging, "I got a C which is better than Jimmie who got a D" - nobody is impressed because the bar is so low.

Bubble is right. You can argue that private schools are good for art and gym and small class sizes. But you can't argue that they're "diverse" on the grounds that they have a *few* more (usually well off) minorities than some non-diverse place like Potomac.

[Anonymous]

Wow people still brag about the Mayflower. I mean after the 60's didn't you realize it is the same as saying i am a descendent of slave owners.

Hello, the pilgrims didn't own slaves. Why don't you tell us what the heck you think "private school polish" means.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not either of the above posters, but the oft-repeated claim that private schools offer more diversity than publics is what seems lie "lunacy" to many of us, not private schools per se. Several posters have shown on other threads that even Chevy Chase public schools have lots of poor kids. Private schools may have a handful of 100% scholarship kids with more $80,000 families getting $5,000-$15,000,

We chose private for other good reasons. But c'mon, where diversity is concerned, private schools are bubbles.

Let's not kid ourselves. It's that bubble factor of private schools that actually appeals to many patents.

The facts are laid out above - the "Chevy Chase" schools draw from areas that include subsidized housing and the school district is NOT uniformly well to do --MOST elementary schools in the southwestern part of MoCo have fewer than 10% black students - many less than 5%. I don't know of a private school with a lower percentage of black students. Parts of MoCo and NW DC are certainly in the bubble as well.

How about Hispanic students? And you've completely ignored the whole SES question.

The biggest problem with your argument, however, is this: just because SW MOCO is not diverse, that in no way means that private schools ARE diverse in all the usual meanings of the word. That's like bragging, "I got a C which is better than Jimmie who got a D" - nobody is impressed because the bar is so low.

Bubble is right. You can argue that private schools are good for art and gym and small class sizes. But you can't argue that they're "diverse" on the grounds that they have a *few* more (usually well off) minorities than some non-diverse place like Potomac.

Agree. We liked the diversity in our private ES, which was predominantly AA, but were surprised to find a totally different kind of diversity in our Bethesda public school. Despite being in a wealthy area there is more SES diversity. The SES diversity that exists in our cluster is at the public school. Definitely people with financial struggles, parents with a range of jobs from cabinet secretaries to painters and landscapers. We didn't have that in our private school where pretty much everyone was a white collar professional. There are also tons of international students, from Europe, Asia, India, etc. While some of those may be white and wealthy they still bring an interesting and different perspective to the mix.

[Anonymous]

The "Big 3" ES of lower MoCo - Holton, Sidwell, Landon have numerous students who commute in from very low SES neighborhoods outside MoCo. How many children from very low SES neighborhoods of PG County and DC attend your MoCo ES?

I'll hang up and listen to your answer. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The "Big 3" ES of lower MoCo - Holton, Sidwell, Landon have numerous students who commute in from very low SES neighborhoods outside MoCo. How many children from very low SES neighborhoods of PG County and DC attend your MoCo ES?

I'll hang up and listen to your answer. Thanks.

Looks like you're phoning it in. You give the answer, over and over. And over. And over.

Another PP and I have had kids in private and public schools and we know you're blowing smoke. Ahahaha. "Numerous" low SES kids at your private? Ahahahaha. And don't bother coming back here with more FA percentages that include $5,000 awarded to families earning $90,000.

One word: Bubble.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Wow people still brag about the Mayflower. I mean after the 60's didn't you realize it is the same as saying i am a descendent of slave owners.

Hello, the pilgrims didn't own slaves. Why don't you tell us what the heck you think "private school polish" means.

I am not the polish lady. You may want to read a little about your history.

Indentured servants, slaves, bondservants, crimping are a few places you should start. Let guess you are 1/2 Cherokee indian too because your Mayflower family and the Indians are long time family friends.

[Anonymous]

It is intersting that to many people, diversity = number of AA kids. When people talk about race in this counrty, they always see it as Black and White. In fact, it is that type of narrow minded thinking that lost the GOP the past election. The last census showed that there are more Hispanics in the US than Blacks. So if you ever hear me talk about racial diversity, I am talking Black, White, Asian and Hispanic. That being said, I am AA and the more important diversity in my book is SES and that cuts across all races.

Back to the orginal question. 3 of my 4 kids attended public through middle school and private high schools. I would say it was worth it generally. At the schools they attended, most of the kids were college motivated regardless of SES. They had to compete academically and that helped my kids focus. Also, they were student athletes and the privates had strong programs in those sports. Finacially it evened out because 2 of the 3 received academic scholarships to college and the third got an athletic scholarship. The 4th is still in HS - a MOCO public that he chose becuase of its technology curriculum.