Can you be friends with people who don't travel?

[Anonymous]

Also OP, have you traveled extensively throughout the US? This is a very large, diverse country and I might unfriend you if I discovered you had never bothered to explore it.

[Anonymous]

I have travelled all over. I spent semesters in London and Sydney, Australia and it was amazing.

DH not a good traveller and has never been outside the US other than Mexico and St Maarten. But you know what all that matters is that he is incredible and I love him. I could give a crap where he has been or what he has seen.

We are taking his first trip to Paris in a year and I could not be more excited to do that with him.

Sure have I curtailed my travels...yes. But having a best friend you love by your side is what matters to me rather than being alone with no one to experience life with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't say I "rule them out" - but I find that most people who don't leave this country are pretty ignorant about things that go on in this world. They will spend thousands of dollars on "organic" (yes, that is meaning to mock") mac N cheese powdered process cheese a year, while there are children who go without clean water. There are arguments every day on DCUM about how there are the "harms" of battery powered flashing toys - when some children play with sticks and rocks.

It's hard to be friends with people who have so much and take so much for granted every day and choose to be ignorant to the world around them. I have a lot and am greatful for it, but I think it is my job to teach my daughter that she has a greater duty to this world. That there are people with less - and I don't mean people with food stamps who get to eat - I mean people who walk 10 miles a day to fill a bucket of clean water for their children to drink.
THAT is what I can't be friends with people who don't invest in the world around them. Because they don't invest in me.

I'm curious- what in the world does this have to do with international travel? Someone coudl take a week each year and go to London, Paris, Rome, Berlin, Buenos Aires, Montreal, etc. And someone else could teach their kids all about the sufferign in this world without leaving the country. It just seems like you're talking about two totally different things. Now, if you point is that you won't be friends with other who don't go on aid missions to impoverished regions, well, that's your business. But fun has it's place in life, too. It is possible to appreciate the advantages you've been given, realize that others have far less, and still enjoy a week's vacation at a nice place.

[Anonymous]

Yes you are a snob.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't say I "rule them out" - but I find that most people who don't leave this country are pretty ignorant about things that go on in this world. They will spend thousands of dollars on "organic" (yes, that is meaning to mock") mac N cheese powdered process cheese a year, while there are children who go without clean water. There are arguments every day on DCUM about how there are the "harms" of battery powered flashing toys - when some children play with sticks and rocks.
It's hard to be friends with people who have so much and take so much for granted every day and choose to be ignorant to the world around them. I have a lot and am greatful for it, but I think it is my job to teach my daughter that she has a greater duty to this world. That there are people with less - and I don't mean people with food stamps who get to eat - I mean people who walk 10 miles a day to fill a bucket of clean water for their children to drink.

THAT is what I can't be friends with people who don't invest in the world around them. Because they don't invest in me.

Most Americans who travel internationally are not headed to third world countries or other places of extreme poverty. They often choose Italy, France, England or somewhere in Europe and I doubt the motivation for travel is the desire to raise their awareness of global poverty and social concerns.

I'm actually willing to bet most people (regardless of country of origin) who have the money to travel are not doing it to raise their awareness of global poverty and social concerns. They are just out for a vacation. There is nothing wrong with that, so long as the travelers understand they are merely travelers, and that two weeks doesn't mean they get what it means to be a native of another country. OP seems to be confusing herself with the locals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also OP, have you traveled extensively throughout the US? This is a very large, diverse country and I might unfriend you if I discovered you had never bothered to explore it.

I agree with this. I realized in fact that I was doing too much international travel, looked at my own country and said, "I haven't explored it enough to merit all of these other trips. I owe it to my own country to see all that is has to offer." So I made a goal of going to all 50 states by the time I was 40. Made the goal with two months to spare. I'm proud of seeing as much as I could of my own country. That being said, I also travel abroad. It would never in a million years keep me from being friends with someone who didn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love to travel internationally and have ended romantic relationships when the man was uninterested in traveling abroad.

It changes once you have kids.

[Anonymous]

My friends prioritize knowing what is happening globally, being open to other foods and cultures, and seeing how people in different countries live. (This is not the same necessarily as working for the international poor, btw.)

Given that, most of my friends, indeed, I would say that all of my close friends, have made international travel a priority.

I wouldn't necessarily word things the way that OP did, but I see her point, and I think that if people on these boards (with their graduate degrees and 6--figure incomes) were honest with themselves, they would agree that they are not likely to befriend people who have no curiosity about the world beyond US borders.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are being ridiculous and close-minded.

Pot calling kettle black.

This. OP, your viewpoint is very odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friends prioritize knowing what is happening globally, being open to other foods and cultures, and seeing how people in different countries live. (This is not the same necessarily as working for the international poor, btw.)

Given that, most of my friends, indeed, I would say that all of my close friends, have made international travel a priority.

I wouldn't necessarily word things the way that OP did, but I see her point, and I think that if people on these boards (with their graduate degrees and 6--figure incomes) were honest with themselves, they would agree that they are not likely to befriend people who have no curiosity about the world beyond US borders.

Just flat out not true. I have both that you describe that I enjoy MY international travel experience. I don't require others to have them. It wouldn't even come up until we were already friends.

[Anonymous]

In my experience, people who paint themselves as world travelers and who will only associate with others who are well-traveled are unadulterated bores. Every conversation has to be about the FABULOUS experience they had on their last trip, where they are going next, and just how well they know other cultures (which often, they don't -they just think they do). I enjoy traveling, but I also enjoy talking about dozens of other topics. And I do not befriend self-important bores.

[Anonymous]

IMO, most women I meet these days talk only about their kids. It's pretty refreshing to talk to someone about international politics. And I love to hear people talk about their travels.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I had this argument last night. He thinks that I am being snobby, but I really don't want to be friends with people who do not/will not travel outside the US. I understand that for financial reasons, some people can't afford it. However, we have a friend who takes all their vacations to Florida - which I just don't understand. How can you not want to see other cultures and try and expand your view of this world. Most likely, it is because I was not born in this country (although raised here).

Does this make me a snob? I don't think so - I just choose my friends based on people who care about a global view.

OP, what is your address? I want to send your DH $250 so he can visit a prostitute. Poor guy, sometimes stepping out is OK.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I had this argument last night. He thinks that I am being snobby, but I really don't want to be friends with people who do not/will not travel outside the US. I understand that for financial reasons, some people can't afford it. However, we have a friend who takes all their vacations to Florida - which I just don't understand. How can you not want to see other cultures and try and expand your view of this world. Most likely, it is because I was not born in this country (although raised here).

Does this make me a snob? I don't think so - I just choose my friends based on people who care about a global view.

Yes, you are a snob.

And I'm sure no one wants you as a travel partner either.

global view?

I grew up in a dual culture, and we rarely travel. So there . . .

[Anonymous]

OP, would you be friends with someone who traveled all over the U.S.? Someone who has been to every state? Please, do not forget, the U.S. is bigger than Europe, but all one country. People who live in Europe, have the luxury of country hoping for not a whole lot of money.

It takes less time to travel from Italy to the Ukraine than it does to go from Maryland to California.

http://www.distancefromto.net This is a fun site.