If your DC is African-Am. or Latino, do you put a lot of thought into how you dress your DC?

[Anonymous]

The comments on here are just so incredibly mean and rude. Is this the behavior you want your children displaying?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Yes, this is true. And anyone who doesn't believe this is probably Caucasian and hasn't felt the behavior of stereotyping strangers. I can say that there is far less of this now than there was 20-30 years ago, but it still exists. I am Chinese American, born and raised in the US. I don't speak with an accent (after living in Maryland for 25+ years, I've managed to lose my Pittsburgh accent that I grew up with). On the phone, most people would have no idea of my race. And yet, when people here my clearly Asian surname I sometimes get interesting reactions. I've had people hear my surname and start to speak slower and louder. I had customer service agents who had no problem conversing normally with me, but when my surname is mentioned, suddenly every 2-3 sentences I would get "Do you understand?" or "Do I need to repeat that?" or they just repeat everything twice. I dress in pretty standard clothing...jeans and polo shirts most of the time. And yet, I can go places and have people react as if I am clearly "different". How often do people "break the ice" with you by discussing what their favorite Chinese food is. Or how much they love sushi? Or talk about how they had a wonderful trip to China and ask if you miss being there? I can guarantee you that some people still stereotype and act differently based on what you look like or even your name. I get these and similar types of comments at least a few times a month. When I was in college, it was a few times a week. Slow progress, but still progress."


Seinfeld episode.

PP here. Sorry, but I've watched a grand total of about 12 episodes of Seinfeld. I'm not much of a TV watcher. This is my real life. For example, I took my wife to a clinic a couple of months ago. While sitting in the waiting room, I had a cute little old couple who looked like they were in their 70's try to break the ice with us. They told me how much they love Chinese food and how their son (who was in the service and fought in VIET NAM, which was stressed very significantly) started taking them to this wonderful buffet, but although most of the food was wonderful, they served some strange things. There was this one thing that my son made me try, but wouldn't tell me what it was. Can you believe that it was raw fish? Do you believe people would actually eat that?", That, details of what her son did in Viet Nam, and questions of if I like living here in America" were the entirety of a long discussion while waiting for our doctor's appointment. My wife spent 10 minutes trying to stifle the laughter of listening to me try to politely divert this couple before she had to go to the bathroom to get away with it. Only one example...I have a lot of others, but some just aren't a humorous as this.

[Anonymous]

I am human born in a country where the 1st language is Spanish, therefore I am considered Hispanic/Latino/Illegal/Mexican (Even thought I am not) or whatever adjective people want to use. DH is also human and was born in a country where the 1st language is English. Our kids whose race is also human, are the most beautiful kids, well behave and I really don’t care what people think about or say about the way we dress. They are always clean and cut.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the poster who visits schools-- I'm a teacher. A caucasian teacher from an upper-middle class background. I think teachers are concerned about cleanliness and signs that a child is not being well taken care of. I have my own personal opinions regarding dress and certainly see children in outfits I wouldn't pick out myself, but in terms of making wholesale judgments, I don't think that's the case among my teacher friends.

I do see kids in my neighborhood wearing pajamas all the time, though- what's up with that??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Yes, this is true. And anyone who doesn't believe this is probably Caucasian and hasn't felt the behavior of stereotyping strangers. I can say that there is far less of this now than there was 20-30 years ago, but it still exists. I am Chinese American, born and raised in the US. I don't speak with an accent (after living in Maryland for 25+ years, I've managed to lose my Pittsburgh accent that I grew up with). On the phone, most people would have no idea of my race. And yet, when people here my clearly Asian surname I sometimes get interesting reactions. I've had people hear my surname and start to speak slower and louder. I had customer service agents who had no problem conversing normally with me, but when my surname is mentioned, suddenly every 2-3 sentences I would get "Do you understand?" or "Do I need to repeat that?" or they just repeat everything twice. I dress in pretty standard clothing...jeans and polo shirts most of the time. And yet, I can go places and have people react as if I am clearly "different". How often do people "break the ice" with you by discussing what their favorite Chinese food is. Or how much they love sushi? Or talk about how they had a wonderful trip to China and ask if you miss being there? I can guarantee you that some people still stereotype and act differently based on what you look like or even your name. I get these and similar types of comments at least a few times a month. When I was in college, it was a few times a week. Slow progress, but still progress."


Seinfeld episode.

Wow, what a rude, dismissive response to someone's life experiences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC looks Hispanic but is bi-racial. I don't really put lots of thought into how I dress her. She's a toddler and I dress her in clothes that I like, which happens to be a mini-boden type style. I don't get comments on her clothes, but I am aware that there are people in the world who might stereotype her because of the color of her skin. My biggest frustration is with people who assume we're poor immigrants, regardless of how we're dressed.

Just wanted to point out, Hispanic is not a race, but I get that you probably mean she looks stereotypically Hispanic- dark eyes, dark hair, darker skin.

However, all biracial means is that she is of two different races; it doesn't say what her background is. She could be biracial white/Native Amrican, which could give her a stereotypically Hispanic look.

DC is of biracial and part Hispanic. DH is Hispanic-American; family came from Spain several generations ago. I am bi-racial, also American. She doesn't look Native American at all. She looks like a darker skinned Spaniard. Unfortunately, some people don't bother looking at facial features. They see dark skin and think Mexican/Latino/South American, which for them implies poor and immigrant, and in our case that couldn't be farther from the truth. I'm not trying to pick on you, but it's interesting that your image of Hispanic means she looks part Native American. Not all Hispanics or even Latinos look this way. A friend from Mexico looks completely European. DH's grandmother had blonde hair and blue eyes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"collard shirt"

mmm...tasty......LMAO

thanks, OP, you just made my day! HA HA HA

Do they come in many colors, or just green?

[Anonymous]

"PP here. Sorry, but I've watched a grand total of about 12 episodes of Seinfeld. I'm not much of a TV watcher. This is my real life. For example, I took my wife to a clinic a couple of months ago. While sitting in the waiting room, I had a cute little old couple who looked like they were in their 70's try to break the ice with us. They told me how much they love Chinese food and how their son (who was in the service and fought in VIET NAM, which was stressed very significantly) started taking them to this wonderful buffet, but although most of the food was wonderful, they served some strange things. There was this one thing that my son made me try, but wouldn't tell me what it was. Can you believe that it was raw fish? Do you believe people would actually eat that?", That, details of what her son did in Viet Nam, and questions of if I like living here in America" were the entirety of a long discussion while waiting for our doctor's appointment. My wife spent 10 minutes trying to stifle the laughter of listening to me try to politely divert this couple before she had to go to the bathroom to get away with it. Only one example...I have a lot of others, but some just aren't a humorous as this. "

This was humorous?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Yes, this is true. And anyone who doesn't believe this is probably Caucasian and hasn't felt the behavior of stereotyping strangers. I can say that there is far less of this now than there was 20-30 years ago, but it still exists. I am Chinese American, born and raised in the US. I don't speak with an accent (after living in Maryland for 25+ years, I've managed to lose my Pittsburgh accent that I grew up with). On the phone, most people would have no idea of my race. And yet, when people here my clearly Asian surname I sometimes get interesting reactions. I've had people hear my surname and start to speak slower and louder. I had customer service agents who had no problem conversing normally with me, but when my surname is mentioned, suddenly every 2-3 sentences I would get "Do you understand?" or "Do I need to repeat that?" or they just repeat everything twice. I dress in pretty standard clothing...jeans and polo shirts most of the time. And yet, I can go places and have people react as if I am clearly "different". How often do people "break the ice" with you by discussing what their favorite Chinese food is. Or how much they love sushi? Or talk about how they had a wonderful trip to China and ask if you miss being there? I can guarantee you that some people still stereotype and act differently based on what you look like or even your name. I get these and similar types of comments at least a few times a month. When I was in college, it was a few times a week. Slow progress, but still progress."


Seinfeld episode.

Wow, what a rude, dismissive response to someone's life experiences.

Paging Oscar Wilde and Noel Coward. Stat!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another ignorant post? Say it isn't so..... No one cares that your children look Latino. No one cares if your child wore his underwear outside of his pants. No one cares but YOU. Being dressed well does not equal good behavior. People comment on your child's behavior because they have good behavior. Why do you feel as though you have something to prove through your children? If you were so concerned about making sure your Latino looking children were not looking "Latino," maybe you should not have reproduced with one. Feel sorry for your kids OP. You are far too uptight. Let your children have FUN. It won't hurt.

Let me guess? You and your kids have blonde hair and blue eyes? FWIW, so do I....but my kids are biracial. And boy, does it ever make a difference.

It may not be right, but it's reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Yes, this is true. And anyone who doesn't believe this is probably Caucasian and hasn't felt the behavior of stereotyping strangers. I can say that there is far less of this now than there was 20-30 years ago, but it still exists. I am Chinese American, born and raised in the US. I don't speak with an accent (after living in Maryland for 25+ years, I've managed to lose my Pittsburgh accent that I grew up with). On the phone, most people would have no idea of my race. And yet, when people here my clearly Asian surname I sometimes get interesting reactions. I've had people hear my surname and start to speak slower and louder. I had customer service agents who had no problem conversing normally with me, but when my surname is mentioned, suddenly every 2-3 sentences I would get "Do you understand?" or "Do I need to repeat that?" or they just repeat everything twice. I dress in pretty standard clothing...jeans and polo shirts most of the time. And yet, I can go places and have people react as if I am clearly "different". How often do people "break the ice" with you by discussing what their favorite Chinese food is. Or how much they love sushi? Or talk about how they had a wonderful trip to China and ask if you miss being there? I can guarantee you that some people still stereotype and act differently based on what you look like or even your name. I get these and similar types of comments at least a few times a month. When I was in college, it was a few times a week. Slow progress, but still progress."


Seinfeld episode.

PP here. Sorry, but I've watched a grand total of about 12 episodes of Seinfeld. I'm not much of a TV watcher. This is my real life. For example, I took my wife to a clinic a couple of months ago. While sitting in the waiting room, I had a cute little old couple who looked like they were in their 70's try to break the ice with us. They told me how much they love Chinese food and how their son (who was in the service and fought in VIET NAM, which was stressed very significantly) started taking them to this wonderful buffet, but although most of the food was wonderful, they served some strange things. There was this one thing that my son made me try, but wouldn't tell me what it was. Can you believe that it was raw fish? Do you believe people would actually eat that?", That, details of what her son did in Viet Nam, and questions of if I like living here in America" were the entirety of a long discussion while waiting for our doctor's appointment. My wife spent 10 minutes trying to stifle the laughter of listening to me try to politely divert this couple before she had to go to the bathroom to get away with it. Only one example...I have a lot of others, but some just aren't a humorous as this.

I'm Caucasian. Blonde hair, blue eyes--I look like a Barbie doll. really. I grew up in Asia, and still spend a lot of time there as an adult. I speak fluent Japanese, and broken Chinese. Asians stereotype, too. I've had this happen to me my whole life, essentially in reverse. I was the only Caucasian in my elementary school, if that gives you some perspective. It can be funny, frightening or annoying. But at least I wasn't in my own country, I was basically a guest in someone else's country (although I thought it was my country as a very young child).

It happens everywhere, and it has to be conditioned out of humans--the tendency.

[Anonymous]

For the record: Spaniards are Caucasians. They come from Europe.

The same continent that gives you Germans, Swedes, French, Austrians, Italians, Dutch, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC looks Hispanic but is bi-racial. I don't really put lots of thought into how I dress her. She's a toddler and I dress her in clothes that I like, which happens to be a mini-boden type style. I don't get comments on her clothes, but I am aware that there are people in the world who might stereotype her because of the color of her skin. My biggest frustration is with people who assume we're poor immigrants, regardless of how we're dressed.

Just wanted to point out, Hispanic is not a race, but I get that you probably mean she looks stereotypically Hispanic- dark eyes, dark hair, darker skin.

However, all biracial means is that she is of two different races; it doesn't say what her background is. She could be biracial white/Native Amrican, which could give her a stereotypically Hispanic look.

DC is of biracial and part Hispanic. DH is Hispanic-American; family came from Spain several generations ago. I am bi-racial, also American. She doesn't look Native American at all. She looks like a darker skinned Spaniard. Unfortunately, some people don't bother looking at facial features. They see dark skin and think Mexican/Latino/South American, which for them implies poor and immigrant, and in our case that couldn't be farther from the truth. I'm not trying to pick on you, but it's interesting that your image of Hispanic means she looks part Native American. Not all Hispanics or even Latinos look this way. A friend from Mexico looks completely European. DH's grandmother had blonde hair and blue eyes.

You missed my point. I know not all Hispanics look part Native American- the variety in my large Hispanic family proves that. That's why I made sure to say "stereotypically Hispanic." In fact, you said in your initial post said that she looks Hispanic- which is in contrast to what you said in your most recent post, saying that there is no one Hispanic look.

My point was that you said your child is biracial and you are as well. Biracial doesn't give any more information than saying monoracial, except it means you and your child are comprised of two races.

[Anonymous]

I'm African American & I work in scientific research. I've witnessed Asian american ignorance at work too many times to count. Some folks feel as though Japanese, Vietnamese, Chinese people are all from the same country, eat the same foods, speak the same language. I heard a co-worker asking a Chinese man how his family in his home country were after the big earthquake in March (remember the huge earthquake was in Japan). The Chinese man said "my family is from China and they are fine." Dumb coworker just says "oh, well I can never remember what country you're from." I dont think it's racism so much I think it's ignorant and offensive. I think the poster (upthread) was saying it was humorous because sometimes people can be clueless to the fact that they are being racially offensive/insensitive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm Caucasian. Blonde hair, blue eyes--I look like a Barbie doll. really. I grew up in Asia, and still spend a lot of time there as an adult. I speak fluent Japanese, and broken Chinese. Asians stereotype, too. I've had this happen to me my whole life, essentially in reverse. I was the only Caucasian in my elementary school, if that gives you some perspective. It can be funny, frightening or annoying. But at least I wasn't in my own country, I was basically a guest in someone else's country (although I thought it was my country as a very young child)

It happens everywhere, and it has to be conditioned out of humans--the tendency.

This is true. Growing up, I remember hearing comments about being "round-eyed" and about being bi-racial when I spent summers with my mom's family in Japan. When I took my very caucasian husband to visit he was openly laughed at and pointed at by every group of young students we walked by. (the kids did it in a really cute way and he was not offended, but it happened)

I am sure it happens everywhere, especially in societies where most people look or act similar. I don't think this is solely an American problem, it just might be more or less of an issue depending on the community in which you live and socialize.