Would this racial designation on your marriage license bother you?

[Anonymous]

I am half Chinese and find the term offensive. To the PP that does NOT find the term offensive, are you actually "oriental"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Being a bitch and dismissing (entirely) what someone says is very common here when someone has a point and another person doesn't want to acknowledge it.

You brought up the separate histories because you really had nothing else to add and wanted all of us to "be enlightened" with your drivel.

Never once did (the poster you were rude to) say she and her DH were of different races. Just that it was a term he used.

That's all. I am done with you.

Two snaps and neck roll, girlfriend!

You toooooold me. Go on with your bad self.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
You brought up the separate histories because you really had nothing else to add and wanted all of us to "be enlightened" with your drivel.

Never once did (the poster you were rude to) say she and her DH were of different races. Just that it was a term he used.

How is it drivel to bring up the fact that the UK and the Us are separate places with separate histories, and therefore a word that people who are from the UK (or have spent significant amounts of time there) find inoffensive can be offensive to people from the US?

And let's be serious, she's not Asian or she would have stated her own opinion on the matter, not just her husband's.

[Anonymous]

I had no idea it was offensive. I don't know that I've called anyone "Oriental" because when thinking about race, "Asian" comes to my mind first. But, when I hear "orient" and "oriental" I think of exotic, fine, mysterious, beautiful, exquisite things and places, like oriental carpets, Marco Polo and the Orient Express. Things I'd love to have or places I'd love to go but would never be able to afford.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its only ok if your husbands designation is "cracker"

Sorry but this made me LOL...

[Anonymous]

Wow. I had no idea that "oriental" was offensive. In my defense, I have only lived in the US for 10 years and "oriental" is a direct translation for the perfectly legitimate term my language uses for people from East-Asia. I always thought Asian too broad a term including a lot of ethnicities from the former USSR, the middle-east, etc. which I don't consider part of the "orient".

I have used the term with several friends of Asian descent and I am SO NOT racist. I now have to go and apologize for being an ignorant and clueless bimbo to all my Asian friends (of whom I have quite a few). Thank you, DCUM for enlightening me, yet again.

[Anonymous]

Try calling a Russian an Asian and see the variety of angry looks you will get.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I had no idea that "oriental" was offensive. In my defense, I have only lived in the US for 10 years and "oriental" is a direct translation for the perfectly legitimate term my language uses for people from East-Asia. I always thought Asian too broad a term including a lot of ethnicities from the former USSR, the middle-east, etc. which I don't consider part of the "orient".

I have used the term with several friends of Asian descent and I am SO NOT racist. I now have to go and apologize for being an ignorant and clueless bimbo to all my Asian friends (of whom I have quite a few). Thank you, DCUM for enlightening me, yet again.

You don't need to apologize. It's something you didn't know about but know you do.

Perhaps your Asian friends don't find offense with the term, or maybe they do but they found it uncomfortable to address it. In any case, you now know what the more polite term is, so don't waste time feeling bad about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Try calling a Russian an Asian and see the variety of angry looks you will get.

This.

[Anonymous]

op, definitely sounds like a rogue entry if you didn't supply the info. Check with your adoption agency to see if they think it will make a difference to have an anachronistic term or an amended license. Forms are a funny thing. In DC public school enrollment forms, you can only enter one race or "other". Go figure. FWIW, during nearly a dacde in UK I never heard the term oriental. South Asian, East Asian, SE Asian, SW Asian and Central Asian seemed fairly standard. Like Eastern, Southern or Northern European. Of course these terms assume a rudimentary knowledge of geography. Wiki-oogle aside, orient means east. As in Charleston is east of the Mississippi. Good luck OP. Luckily for all of us, "skin thickness" is not a measurable requirement for parenthood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its only ok if your husbands designation is "cracker"

I think the correct term is "Crack-ah".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its only ok if your husbands designation is "cracker"

I think the correct term is "Crack-ah".

Isn't that just Boston? Who wants maw Crack-ahs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had no idea it was offensive. I don't know that I've called anyone "Oriental" because when thinking about race, "Asian" comes to my mind first. But, when I hear "orient" and "oriental" I think of exotic, fine, mysterious, beautiful, exquisite things and places, like oriental carpets, Marco Polo and the Orient Express. Things I'd love to have or places I'd love to go but would never be able to afford.

Ever hear that Asians are very good students and especially good at math and science? Even positive stereotypes are stereotypes.

[Anonymous]

PP here who was also married in SC in 1996. Lists White for me and DH. I can't remember whether we had to declare race on the form. We were married in a different county. I have a sneaking suspicion that the race designation, if required on the application, pre-dates Loving v. Virginia, but it's just a suspicion. In any case, it seems unlikely OP will be able to get the designation removed, although a friendly phone call to the clerk's office in Charleston County's probate court (I assume the probate court issued your license; they did for us in the county in which we were married) might do the trick to see if there is a way to get the designation off. I was dead serious about the friendly. That old saying about catching more flies with honey is 100% true in my experience when dealing with those kinds of people who might be able to help if they want to. A back story (invented is fine) about why you want it off (the adoption people said to me that...) might even help.

Somebody will be outraged that I think you should play these kinds of games, but honestly, if you want a result, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do (says someone who sometimes has had to do the same thing for different reasons).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
PS: this reminds me -- in southern Africa, I met a number of pale-skinned European-descendent Africans who simply described themselves as "African." Here in the US, most folks would be totally puzzled by this self-description. But who are we/they to judge?

pale-skinned European-descendents living in Australia call themselves Australians. The continent belonged to the aborigines. But how are we to judge?