Very controversial question but hoping it can stay on the tracks….

[Anonymous]

You cannot teach children not to hit by hitting them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The chances of unwittingly giving your child a lifelong sexual fetish—and despising you when he realizes his peers aren’t humiliated at home—are high. Hoping this is a troll.

omg, how ridiculous I hope you are a troll.

Actually research backs this up!

[Anonymous]

My older brother was physically punished (spanked with a belt) for getting Bs instead of all As in school. He grew up to be a heroin addict in college and is now a middle-aged alcoholic with a dissociative personality disorder. I don’t know what else our parents did in order to raise a kid they could be proud of, but they effed him up for life. I remember being spanked by my father once because my sister was bullying me and I was crying loudly enough to wake him up from his nap. It was hard enough that I fell on the bed. This is one of the few early memories I have. This stuff is traumatizing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you spank your child, they will tell a friend or an adult or a teacher and you will get reported for child abuse. Not exaggerating at all.

Teachers know that there is no point in reporting a parent unless there are visible marks, cuts, or bruises. CPS won't investigate unless there are.

Mandated reporters like teachers will absolutely report if a child says they were hit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The chances of unwittingly giving your child a lifelong sexual fetish—and despising you when he realizes his peers aren’t humiliated at home—are high. Hoping this is a troll.

omg, how ridiculous I hope you are a troll.

Actually research backs this up!

Millions, if not billions of people throughout history have been spanked as kids. Are you telling me that all of these people have a sexual fetish.

Both DH and I were spanked as kids. We don't have a fetish nor do we despise our parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My older brother was physically punished (spanked with a belt) for getting Bs instead of all As in school. He grew up to be a heroin addict in college and is now a middle-aged alcoholic with a dissociative personality disorder. I don’t know what else our parents did in order to raise a kid they could be proud of, but they effed him up for life. I remember being spanked by my father once because my sister was bullying me and I was crying loudly enough to wake him up from his nap. It was hard enough that I fell on the bed. This is one of the few early memories I have. This stuff is traumatizing.

good lord. Way to take it to the extreme.

How about this: my brother was hit on the back of his legs with a fishing rod when he was like 8 or something for starting a fire on purpose. He ended up going to a public Ivy and becoming an engineer. Does that mean that all kids who get hit with a fishing rod end up going to a public ivy and becoming an engineer?

FWIW, I don't condone any of this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of the replies here are idiotic. Spanking can absolutely be used as part of a broader parenting scheme. Your problem is that your kid is already pretty old to start spanking. You also don't mention what other punishments you have tried already - spanking should never be the first step, not even the second... spanking is the "ultimate" punishment and is meant to show your kid that they really messed up. Have you put the kid in a corner or made them sit quietly on a step or a chair, something mild, but boring should always be the primary punishment (once you get to the point of having to punish). Realistically this should have been started with a much younger child, and the spank would have been very mild.. now the kid is older and a mild spank will do nothing.

+1 agree.

All you "omg you're gonna scar the kid for life" are being ridiculous. No pediatrician will tell you that a couple of spanks when your kid was young is going to scar him for life.

It's the repeated spanking for every single little thing, the go to punishment with anger and screaming that can scar a child. Not the handful of spanking.

You people are ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

You cannot just spank in anger and think that it teaches them a lesson. Spanking is supposed to be physically uncomfortable, part of ongoing dialog, also just a small part of the whole punishment.

So, it may be spanking, and being sent to the room, and a few hours of telling them that what was wrong - their action, defiance, rule breaking, disrespecting and future ramification.

Your disciplining and talk should continue long enough for it to become something that they don't want to experience again.

Did I spank? Yes. Two kids, at least 3 times each in their lives they have been spanked.

[Anonymous]

For those who spank, at what age do you stop and why that age?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of the replies here are idiotic. Spanking can absolutely be used as part of a broader parenting scheme. Your problem is that your kid is already pretty old to start spanking. You also don't mention what other punishments you have tried already - spanking should never be the first step, not even the second... spanking is the "ultimate" punishment and is meant to show your kid that they really messed up. Have you put the kid in a corner or made them sit quietly on a step or a chair, something mild, but boring should always be the primary punishment (once you get to the point of having to punish). Realistically this should have been started with a much younger child, and the spank would have been very mild.. now the kid is older and a mild spank will do nothing.

+1 agree.

All you "omg you're gonna scar the kid for life" are being ridiculous. No pediatrician will tell you that a couple of spanks when your kid was young is going to scar him for life.

It's the repeated spanking for every single little thing, the go to punishment with anger and screaming that can scar a child. Not the handful of spanking.

You people are ridiculous.

Some of us aim a little higher than "not scarring our children for life," but I guess you don't.

[Anonymous]

The rule was if there is a life-and-death situation for the child or the sibling. I would spank a child to stop the child from killing himself. Examples include trying to jump off a roof or in front of a moving bus. I had boys.

[Anonymous]

I am a teacher. If you do this, then he will begin hitting the kids in his class. I see it often, and I can tell how kids interact with their parents based on seeing how they interact with other kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do timeouts in the garage. Even if the temperature is uncomfortable and DC is not dressed for it. If DC refuses or resists, we drag them to the garage.

What the f***.

Also op, you know spanking is wrong. Laughing at the poster who suggests having your kid hug you after. Do you also make them thank you after each spank?

"Thank you Sir, may I have another?"

[Anonymous]

all the research is extremely clear that spanking is ineffective and detrimental to the child.

signed, a child psychologist

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of the replies here are idiotic. Spanking can absolutely be used as part of a broader parenting scheme. Your problem is that your kid is already pretty old to start spanking. You also don't mention what other punishments you have tried already - spanking should never be the first step, not even the second... spanking is the "ultimate" punishment and is meant to show your kid that they really messed up. Have you put the kid in a corner or made them sit quietly on a step or a chair, something mild, but boring should always be the primary punishment (once you get to the point of having to punish). Realistically this should have been started with a much younger child, and the spank would have been very mild.. now the kid is older and a mild spank will do nothing.

+1 agree.

All you "omg you're gonna scar the kid for life" are being ridiculous. No pediatrician will tell you that a couple of spanks when your kid was young is going to scar him for life.

It's the repeated spanking for every single little thing, the go to punishment with anger and screaming that can scar a child. Not the handful of spanking.

You people are ridiculous.

Some of us aim a little higher than "not scarring our children for life," but I guess you don't.

Agree. I don't want my child to be scared for life, but a couple of spanks in a child's life won't "scar the child for life".