Anonymous wrote:Taking a little survey. So my adult dc and I go to the same dentist, we’ve been going there for over twenty years. I pay my dc’s dental bills because it’s just something I want to do for him. I’ve had a lot of work done over the past several years and have more coming up. It’s expensive. So we both go every 3-months for routine cleaning. At dc’s last appointment, the hygienest texted me, and said is it ok if I do the panoramic xray this time, it’s been several years. I said no, maybe in a few years but right now we can’t do it. She says ok. Now he just had his routine appointment and she did the panoramic xray. Apparently, the doctor sees a shortened tooth root that he attributes to his braces and he had those about 25 years ago. They did tell me about the shortened tooth root about 5 or 6 years ago. But at that time it didn’t require any treatment. They were just going to keep an eye on it. Now, the doctor is going to send this to his “friend” whom I presume is some type of specialist, and he’s going to look at the xray. Currently that tooth isn’t bothering dc at all. I’m hoping upon hope that it won’t need any treatment in the foreseeable future. But in any event, my question is; Wouid that upset you that I just told thr hygienist no, not for several years and yet three months later she did it. I’m livid, yet my husband says don’t bother saying anything, it’s too late, it’s already done.
What do you all think?
This is the OP, I’m going to try to address some of the responses I’ve received.
I didn’t believe it was necessary to provide that my dc has a disability. In my opinion, it doesn’t matter, nor does it matter whether or not I have medical power of attorney. The hygienist texted me to ask at previous appointment about three months ago and I was very clear in saying no. I said (which I had told her and others in there awhile back about being inundated with medical bills. I’m sure the hygienist remembered that I said that, this is a small one doctor practice, with one hygienist (previously two and she retired) one assistant and one secretary. He is an “out of network” provider, therefore it costs more. But, because he’s out of network, he has less patients and can provide more time and individualized attention -that’s my understanding. I have dental insurance at $1500 per year, as do DH and DC but it costs $300 a year so you really get $1200 a year and when you see an out of network provider it covers very little.
Because it’s a small office, there’s more chit chat, it’s almost like we are all friends. We don’t socialize outside of the office, but the hygienest, the assistant and I will occasionally text or talk on the phone. They’ve both been there as long as I’ve been there.
Regardless of anything, I just felt it was kind of sneaky, the way she did it. I now know she didn’t say, the panoramic xray is $375 is ot ok if we do that today. She said time for your panoramic Xray, stand, click. Done.
I was not taken to the dentist as a child, my parents were unable to afford it. I don’t believe they knew about dental schools or income based clinics and so forth. We resided in rural area. It was important to me, so as soon as I was able in my early twenties, I got myself to the dentist right away-the minute I could do so. I had so many problems from not going, pain in many teeth, lots of cavities, several root canals, crowns. I went twice a week for many months and got all caught up. I’ve had problems ever since. Whether my dentist is scamming me or not, I don’t know, sometimes I think so and other times I don’t . I do know or I should say it’s my understanding that any time you do fillings, root canals crowns, you compromise the integrity of the structure of the tooth and perhaps surrounding teeth. Fillings, root canals crowns don’t last indefinitely, after some time, further decay can happen, they can become infected , they can need to be replaced. Root canals can need to be redone. I think that’s what much of my work has been from. As to my sons root thing, it’s my understanding that moving teeth from orthodontic work can sometimes cause one or more roots to shorten or something like that, sometimes it needs treatment and sometimes just watch it. Probably each situation is different.
As to why I’m paying for the dental expenses, what difference does it make. Some people but their kids a house, a car (which we’ve also done previously) and other things. I don’t want my child to go through what I’ve been through. I took him to the dentist when he had his first tooth! He’d lay on me, they’d wipe the tooth with a little gauze, sprinkle a little water on it. I wanted my child to become accustomed to it, comfortable with it, not be panicked and terrified like me. We go every three or four months (all of us) dh goes elsewhere, because my understanding is, that whole visit your dentist twice a year like the toothpaste advertisements used to say, is the old way. My understanding is now many people go 3 or 4 times a year, most people I know do.
Anyway, because of what I went through, I made a promise to myself when he was born that I would make sure he got regular dental care and that I would pay for it for as long as I could. We have told adult child that we will pay for it as long as we can but that won’t be indefinitely and we won’t even be here forever.
You all don’t have to agree and some have used the word bizarre, and some have said you’re struggling with why we do that. You’ll probably struggle even more when I say I still buy his toothpaste, his sonicare toothbrush, replacement heads, his manual toothbrushes, toothpaste and dental floss. Why is this a problem! Many people I know see a bottle of perfume that pick up for an adult child just because or an item they know the adult child would like and pick it up. What’s the difference, so what. And yes I paid for his braces, that was important to me too. I babysat, did things around the neighborhood starting at age 11 and saved my money and paid for my own braces as well af the extractions needed prior to the braces being put on.
I’m going to do it as long as I can.
If we think a second opinion is needed regarding the current potential situation with adult child’s tooth root, he will get a second opinion. We will pay for it. I have been paying more attention lately, and maybe we will need ti make a change in dentists. I don’t know yet. We will see bid of goes.
Also too, you spend more time at home (even though sometimes I feel like I’ve spent more time at the dentist) so basically good home care, products and technique with brushing and flossing are super important.
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