Gift link: Life is Too Short to Fight with Family

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:This is a guest article written by a boomer that studies gerontology. It’s very much from the boomer perspective as this is the generation most likely to become estranged due to their behaviors. Sure it would be nice for these people if they never faced consequences for their behavior and got to enjoy mistreating everyone around them under the umbrella ‘ your family, you have to put up with it’! However, it’s healthier for others to build connections with others who are respectful, enjoyable company and not entitled.


Co-author Mel Robbins is Gen X.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Mel Robbins-- barf. She is one of the biggest gritters. No credential to be spewing her love one another BS.

Let them... oh wait don't let them.


1000%. So tired of Mel Robbins - having an airport best seller doesn’t give you credentials to be providing mental health advice.


She just steals other people's ideas. "Let them" originated from her own daughter.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t believe in spending time with people I wouldn’t choose to spend time with - family or not. Just because someone is family doesn’t mean they are a decent or a good person. And even if they are a “decent” person, if I just don’t like them, why would I force myself to spend time with them when there are many other people I could be spending time with? This transcends politics.


This attitude is a big problem these days. Because they are family, that’s why. Across cultures, across centuries, this has meant something. It doesn’t suddenly not mean anything because you don’t like it. Life isn’t always fun and about your own personal preferences.
I mean, do you feel the same about your own kids? Surely they aren’t always likable or easy?


I guess someone should have told my uncle not to molest his sister, my aunt, Because Family. I guess someone should have told my grandparents to do more about it than stern talking-tos and a meeting with the priest, Because Family.

Across cultures, across centuries, family members have harmed and abused one another, but all is meant to be silenced and swept under the rug. You’re mad because many of us won’t put up with horrible behavior, whether it is abuse or homophobia or xenophobia, just because family “means something.” When what it means is harmful and oppressive, we’re done here. Thanks and have a great day.


This!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Mel Robbins-- barf. She is one of the biggest gritters. No credential to be spewing her love one another BS.

Let them... oh wait don't let them.


1000%. So tired of Mel Robbins - having an airport best seller doesn’t give you credentials to be providing mental health advice.


She just steals other people's ideas. "Let them" originated from her own daughter.


Actually it came from another person entirely and there is ongoing litigation.

Listen to the “If Books Could Kill” podcast on her, published 4/23/25.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is a guest article written by a boomer that studies gerontology. It’s very much from the boomer perspective as this is the generation most likely to become estranged due to their behaviors. Sure it would be nice for these people if they never faced consequences for their behavior and got to enjoy mistreating everyone around them under the umbrella ‘ your family, you have to put up with it’! However, it’s healthier for others to build connections with others who are respectful, enjoyable company and not entitled.


Co-author Mel Robbins is Gen X.


Influencer garbage
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If someone’s “politics” directly harms others or bars them from civil rights/human rights, yes, I would rather not spend my time on Earth with them. So I’m good.


Unless you’re attempting to overthrow our government as we speak, YOUR politics directly harm others every single day and bars them from basic human rights. You can pretend to be against these policies but you’re directly benefiting from the suffering of others, i.e. you’re complicit.

The world extends far beyond your own backyard.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:More like life is too short to spend it with horrible people just because you are technically family.


+1

I am tired of making excuses for horrible people because I am related to them. Now- if I wouldn't be friends with this person, I am not hanging out with them because they are related to me.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:This article is so wrong on many levels. Watch this Oprah show : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RMr8KgOZnXg

There is a hospice care nurse at the end of the show sharing her experience dealing with dying people whose children chose no contact, those people remain manipulative even on their death bed.


I might have posted this in another thread on DCUM. But yes, this is true. My narcissistic mother was enraged that she had to share the spotlight with my dying father in the final five minutes of his life. He was staring at the ceiling and his breathing was heavy as he struggled for oxygen. Meanwhile, she was rambling on about what a fabulous caregiver she had been to him. No joke--when she noticed I was laser focused on him and ignoring her, she snapped at me, in Mommie Dearest style "YOU should be looking at ME, NOT HIM!"

You cannot make this up.

I felt guilty for going no contact with her until I found out she went no contact with all seven of her siblings. I finally feel like I have more moments of feeling at ease within my own body. Meanwhile, my father is dead and my sisters and I have stress related conditions/illnesses.

My mother's doctor tells her she could live another 30 years. Life is too long to suffer a narcissist who slowly but chronically erodes your physical and mental health. Until you go no contact.
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