Would you leave your 17 year old home alone for 2 days over the weekend?

[Anonymous]

I would say maybe. I think it’s entirely kid dependent. Is she one night or is it 2-3 nights?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH has a work trip that he’d like me to attend a few hours away from where we live . DD17 doesn’t want to come along. I’m not sure if we should let her stay alone. She’s not a partier so I’m not worried about that. But, we’ve never left her alone overnight before. She’s willing to stay alone and is responsible. I guess I’m just overly anxious. So considering all this, should we?

You don’t need to selfishly go away on your husband’s work trip. Stay home and parent. If anything happens to your DC, you are to blame.

+1 this is worlds different than being in a college dorm surrounded by people and with rules and safety measures in place. Choose your child and look forward to the times you can run away on a last minute trip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP: She did just turn 17 and is a junior not senior. I have a 25 year old DS who lives very close who can check up on her and is close by in case of an emergency, or if I still don’t
comfortable with her being alone, she can stay with DS or he can come over to stay with her.

I would ask brother to stay with her. Honestly, it would probably be a good opportunity for both to connect anyhow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP: She did just turn 17 and is a junior not senior. I have a 25 year old DS who lives very close who can check up on her and is close by in case of an emergency, or if I still don’t
comfortable with her being alone, she can stay with DS or he can come over to stay with her.

I feel like you buried the lede with this one. In that case I would absolutely do it. You don't even have to involve a neighbor!

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't think anything of it. I started staying home for the weekend when my parents went away as soon as I could drive myself to the grocery store.

[Anonymous]

My kid is only 13 so I don't have a reasonable input on this, but I'm surprised at all the people who do it! I was never left alone overnight in high school, ever. I can't think of any close friends that were, either. Sometimes they'd sleep over if they had a single mom who had to travel for work or if parents had to deal with a serious medical issue, but none of us were left home alone.

[Anonymous]

Will she brings boys back

[Anonymous]

yes. We leave our 15.5 year old home alone overnight. We're very close to our neighbors, she's not a partier and she's the 3rd kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. The number of people saying no in this thread is absolutely wild to me. For a responsible kid with a nearby older brother, how is it even a question? No wonder Gen Z is so anxious and sad. Few parents have faith in them and they have no chance to be confident and practice independence.

+1

Anonymous wrote:We would let our 16 year old son stay home alone for a couple days. We are close friends with neighbors on two sides, and his best friend lives a few doors down. He’s already driving himself to and from school, practices, and work and has proven to be responsible with that freedom. The dangers of being in the house alone seem minor by comparison.

This. We recently did so for our youngest (rising Senior but still only 16) when we moved older sib into their first apt at college. Long-time neighbors knew, DC checked in, and all was well. And, she actually missed us. It was a successful experiment and a huge win-win. She felt trusted and we could confirm were raising a responsible young person.

Same here. We left our 15 year old home alone for 2 nights when moving older siblings into college (2 schools) this fall. She walked our dogs, etc.
We arranged rides for parent friends to drive her to and from school and left her with microwavable frozen meals. All was great. She's a mature kid and not a partier.

[Anonymous]

I would arrange with a good-hearted (pay money if they will take it) willing neighbor for your DD to show at their house to spend the night. If you have that kind of friend/neighbor. That's what I did as a teen. My parents traveled often. I had a car. My schedule/where I went was no one's business. I generally though went home after school. Sometimes not. The neighbor usually asked me if I wanted to come over for dinner (nice but I always declined) I would show up at their house by 8pm. I thought that was early, in a teenager's mind, and I wanted to be considerate so they wouldn't worry. Leave in the morning for school. They/my parents only had the expectation that I would sleep there.

Absent of the above though, now that I am a parent unless the trip was important, I wouldn't go.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely. Without a second thought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH has a work trip that he’d like me to attend a few hours away from where we live . DD17 doesn’t want to come along. I’m not sure if we should let her stay alone. She’s not a partier so I’m not worried about that. But, we’ve never left her alone overnight before. She’s willing to stay alone and is responsible. I guess I’m just overly anxious. So considering all this, should we?

In many states kids can live on their own at that age.

I did, so this question and answers are hilarious. I understand the concerns and there's always a spectrum but its a good small step growth opportunity op. If she has a nearby brother, just set her up with meals and snacks in the fridge and have her phone on hand to check in. If you act like its no big deal but she needs to be responsible about things like locking doors and no candles, make sure stove is off, she could grow from this. If you act nervous and like impending doom and you cant trust her, her confidence might tell her she's not capable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 17 year old is going to London at the end of September to start college. We started leaving him alone at home for a few days at a time a few months ago. That way, he will come out of his room and enjoys his home because otherwise he stays holed up in his room. He has a summer job so that gives him some daily structure.
The fact that he is going abroad for college expedited the process of giving him more responsibility. I'm not worried about what he does at home; I'm more worried about the deep drinking culture in the UK.

This just sounds incredibly sad. Your son is going off to college in another country in a few months and instead of spending a lot of time with him or traveling together, you leave him for a FEW days alone repeatedly? And the only way he will come out if his room is if no one else is around his home?

DP
Sad to you but enviable and admirable to me. I feel sad for the overly coddled kids, if you dont let them breathe, they'll suffer from anxiety and dependence.

[Anonymous]

My parents did with my older brothers, the younger kids stated at a family friends house in the neighborhood, we were 12 and 8. My older brothers were required to join us for dinner at the neighbors house and the neighbors kept an eye on our house to prevent parties.

Does she have a friend in the neighborhood who she could join for a meal or have as a backup in case she gets spooked at home?

[Anonymous]

Uh yeah of course. These other answers are insane!!