My Asian third grader fits right into Asian stereotypes

[Anonymous]

He's missing one thing to be a perfect Asian kid, martial art.

Unless you consider Asian kids are born with martial art skill.

[Anonymous]

My lily white 2nd grader loves math (including competitions), violin (does DCYOP) and soccer (plays travel). He can take or leave chess, but loves strategic board games in general.

[Anonymous]

Wait soccer is just for Asian kids??? I need to let my white son know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best thing you can do is diversify the people you associate with. I lived in a “luxury” building at one time with a large Asian population. It was a high tech area with a lot of Asian workers here for a couple of years or long time.

They never talked to anyone non-Asian and traveled in groups. They never acknowledged your existence. Some of them were candid in their not wanting their children to make friends with white Americans. The kids weren’t introduced to anything but Asian things.

And when you sub Asian for white (or "American" since you never acknowledge one van me Asian and American) it all sounds ok. That's how you know you're being racist PP.

They never talked to anyone non-American and traveled in groups. They never acknowledged your existence. Some of them were candid in their not wanting their children to make friends with non-Americans. The kids weren’t introduced to anything but American things.

And the white people are all like, yep that sounds pretty good!

Nothing was written about “all Asian” people. It was a group in my building. They were Chinese. The women and children travelled as a group. There were Americans all races, Middle Eastern, Russian and Eastern European families also in the building and they all mingled and the kids all played. The Chinese families wouldn’t even make eye contact if we were in the same elevator.

I would guess you’ve never lived outside of suburbs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best thing you can do is diversify the people you associate with. I lived in a “luxury” building at one time with a large Asian population. It was a high tech area with a lot of Asian workers here for a couple of years or long time.

They never talked to anyone non-Asian and traveled in groups. They never acknowledged your existence. Some of them were candid in their not wanting their children to make friends with white Americans. The kids weren’t introduced to anything but Asian things.

And when you sub Asian for white (or "American" since you never acknowledge one van me Asian and American) it all sounds ok. That's how you know you're being racist PP.

They never talked to anyone non-American and traveled in groups. They never acknowledged your existence. Some of them were candid in their not wanting their children to make friends with non-Americans. The kids weren’t introduced to anything but American things.

And the white people are all like, yep that sounds pretty good!

Nothing was written about “all Asian” people. It was a group in my building. They were Chinese. The women and children travelled as a group. There were Americans all races, Middle Eastern, Russian and Eastern European families also in the building and they all mingled and the kids all played. The Chinese families wouldn’t even make eye contact if we were in the same elevator.

I would guess you’ve never lived outside of suburbs.

This actually makes you sound more racist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have an Eastern European kid that’s into math, chess, piano and badminton. It’s not just Asian stereotypes!

Same, but gymnastics and ballet instead of badminton. DH tried to block ballet and chess because of the stereotypes.

[Anonymous]

If those are his interests, why force him to do other things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It would be strategic to choose a less saturated instrument. For viola and french horn, orchestras roll out the red carpet.

I know, I’m not thrilled and actually encouraged him to try piano (for musical education) or viola (way less saturated), but no go. He seems like the spotlight.

He's a lot less likely to get the spotlight on violin. Way too much competition around here. What about cello? Pretty popular, but not like violin.

He'd get way more traction with the viola--one of the few musicians who really made it in my youth orchestra was a violist, and she's in a professional quartet now and has played Carnegie Hall. Our former concertmaster is now a second violinist in the local opera orchestra back home. As a hobby, though, violin has suited me just fine and more than 20 years later I'm still playing!

[Anonymous]

Don't be silly, OP. I'm an Indian who grew up playing tennis and violin, and still love both hobbies. One of my (half-Indian) kids does too. My life didn't follow a stereotypical Indian path, and that's fine, but it doesn't make me better than anyone who became a dr or a lawyer.

I will say that I have enjoyed taking my kids to India over the years, and they've been able to meet people who are diverse in every way except race. They are professors, scientists, engineers, programmers, artists, business people, authors, people striving hard to overcome poverty and going to college, social workers, journalists, lawyers, politicians and government workers. And they are fulfilled and content in a way I don't see as often here among strivers of any race or background.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand how a violin magically appeared in your house. You as the parent chose for your kid to play violin. You could have chosen another instrument besides violin or cello or piano.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s like some cosmic joke. Of course I want to support his interests and his interests may change, but also wonder if I should encourage him in other activities while he is still young? He likes math, violin, chess, and plays soccer. He wants to take part in youth orchestra and do math and violin competitions. I feel a little weird that he is only pursuing stereotypical Asian things and I can’t say that it’s my doing because I actually do not enjoy string instruments, never participated in orchestra, and do not understand math or chess.

We (born in US but have immigrant parents from Asia) have two boys. I played the guitar, was in varsity soccer and lacrosse in HS, and even continued to to played coed rec soccer later in life. When the kids were younger, they did some travel basketball and soccer, played the drums, wrote for the newspaper, and were in theaters. Then out of nowhere, both migrated to serious cello/violin, tennis, piano, STEM. They still continued to do some theater and write for the newspaper but it is more of something they are doing because I have encouraged them to continue with those activities.

Kids like what they like, and I don't think you should pigeon hole it as "Asian" activities if it happens to be certain hobbies. Seriously. Just be happy that they are engaged and involved in activities that they enjoy.

[Anonymous]

At our HS, we have kids of Asian ethnicity in all sorts of sport and they compete at the State level. Volleyball, football, field hockey, soccer, golf. They are also in debate, newspaper, theaters, band, etc. The only one I am not seeing as much involvement is basketball because they are not 6'5" tall, but I have seen them do amazing in point guard positions.

I am so happy to see that the barriers are not put there due to race, and kids are pursuing whatever it is they want to try their hands at, and excelling in them. Seriously, don't think too much about it.

[Anonymous]

You are insecure

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It would be strategic to choose a less saturated instrument. For viola and french horn, orchestras roll out the red carpet.

Yes, but it’s harder to hear the notes on a French horn, tensile to other bread instruments. I tried to switch to FH and couldn’t get the hang of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best thing you can do is diversify the people you associate with. I lived in a “luxury” building at one time with a large Asian population. It was a high tech area with a lot of Asian workers here for a couple of years or long time.

They never talked to anyone non-Asian and traveled in groups. They never acknowledged your existence. Some of them were candid in their not wanting their children to make friends with white Americans. The kids weren’t introduced to anything but Asian things.

And when you sub Asian for white (or "American" since you never acknowledge one van me Asian and American) it all sounds ok. That's how you know you're being racist PP.

They never talked to anyone non-American and traveled in groups. They never acknowledged your existence. Some of them were candid in their not wanting their children to make friends with non-Americans. The kids weren’t introduced to anything but American things.

And the white people are all like, yep that sounds pretty good!

Nothing was written about “all Asian” people. It was a group in my building. They were Chinese. The women and children travelled as a group. There were Americans all races, Middle Eastern, Russian and Eastern European families also in the building and they all mingled and the kids all played. The Chinese families wouldn’t even make eye contact if we were in the same elevator.

I would guess you’ve never lived outside of suburbs.

NP but there are plenty of white people like that. They will look at a POC like, oh, I have to interact with one of you now?