5th grader won’t use school bathroom, peed pants on bus
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Anonymous
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My neighbor's dd has it in her 504 (IEP? idk) that she's allowed to use the restroom in the nurse's office. She goes before lunch each day.
My DD went through a phase in MS where she was refusing to use the restroom. This was in 6th before she started her period. I told her when she started, she'd HAVE to use the school restrooms no matter what. I kept asking and asking and finally got it out of her that the school toilet handles were always wet when she touched them to flush. It grossed her out and upset her because most of the time the bathroom was either out of soap or paper towels or both. She said she didn't feel clean after washing her hands when there was no soap or towels, so she'd then also avoid eating lunch those days if she couldn't eat what I packed her without touching the food. We did therapy but the CBT therapist concluded it was a quirk not an issue like OCD. What helped my DD was teaching her the foot flush. I also bought these little hand soap sheets that come in a box the size of dental floss and I got her a tiny travel towel that folds up into a tiny square the size of a pack of gum. The problem came back in 9th grade but that time it was related to all the kids vaping & smoking in the bathrooms. She was afraid she'd be using the bathroom while someone was in there vaping/smoking, and she'd get inadvertently busted by a teacher. I guess teachers would barge in and round up everyone in the bathroom when they smelled a vape or smoke or during common times like before/after lunch. I went to the principal about this one and he agreed that a blanket rounding-up tactic wasn't fair or efficient. He claimed to not know that that was going on. I find that hard to believe. But anyway, he said a change would be made and then a week or so later he sent me an email of the notice that was given to teachers that blanket roundups couldn't be done and only students that they visualized using a vape could be sent to their appropriate Dean. |
Anonymous
Agree. Sometimes you have to use gross school bathrooms, or even disgusting gas station bathrooms or porta potties, or go on the woods. Just deal. I’ve been in some bathrooms outside of the US that would make any middle school bathroom look like The Plaza. But under no circumstance do you pee your pants. Lesson learned for your kid. |
Anonymous
Poor kiddo. It’s possible that someone barged into her bathroom stall or looked under and now she is worried to use school bathroom. Perhaps talk to the teacher/administrator and allow her use the teacher bathrooms until she feels ok again. Another solution- let her go during class time, so she doesn’t encounter other kids - again, talk to the teacher, so they are discreet and private about it and let her go without any questions. |
Anonymous
Yeah, I read your post and thought you need therapy, too. This is not healthy. |
Anonymous
Don’t listen to potty mouth trying to give potty advice. CBT and exposure therapy are effective ways to address anxiety and avoidant behaviors. Use public restrooms wherever and whenever you can to normalize these situations. |
Anonymous
“…expect her to be suicidal…” Really? A psychological blow for sure, but to this degree? I’ve witnessed college women who have wet their pants after a frat party and moved on from it. |
Anonymous
| That girl needs to get her sh*t together! |
Anonymous
sometimes they have to wait a few minutes till their friends come back from the bathroom. At least our middle school policy is one at a time. Tell your friend to come back and then they can go. After 10 minutes I will let them go, but the other kid will get in trouble if they don't have a good excuase on why they were out for so long, it happens more than once. |
Anonymous
Please tell me what consequences these kids face because I sure haven’t seen any. |
Anonymous
That's a fact! Heck, I peed myself on the metro the other day, and I'm a grandma! Not suicidal! |