16yo staying by themselves for a few days

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was the biggest goody two shoes on the planet and when my parents left me alone for a long weekend, the first thing I did was sneak out and spend the weekend with my boyfriend.

Absolutely not. I don’t care how responsible your kid is. They’re still a kid.

I was a goody two shoes also and when left alone I just took longer showers than normal and danced around the living room with music blasting (my family's version of blasting - you couldn't hear it from outside the house). Maybe I skipped vegetables a couple of nights. Some goody two shoes really ARE good.

This was me, too.

At one point my then BF even came over the house and I wouldn’t let him in. I just followed the rules.

[Anonymous]

Yes- I have done this with my 16 year old son and had no issues. She just needed my credit some pizza. Honestly, my son loved the times when he had the house to himself. But if my son was the type to get into trouble, it would be a different situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm going on a 4-day work trip in two weeks and I'm a single parent. My kid recently got their license and is pretty responsible- do you think it's fine if they stay by themselves while I'm away? This would be the first time they are alone for more than one night, but they are totally fine with it. I'm a little nervous, but they can drive and I don't have to worry about them trashing the house or anything. What do you think?

I would, but not if there is a boyfriend/girlfriend. Do you have friends or neighbors that can check in?

[Anonymous]

OP, I stayed by myself a lot growing up, at various ages with various arrangement. So often not completely alone. At the age you mention, it was arranged that I would spend overnights at a neighbors house. This was not something I had any say about. I did what I was told (which now, as a parent, is the way I think it should be.) It was not a house of friends of mine (no teens in the house) but they were nice-enough people. I had to be respectful and come-in by 8pm, leave in the morning for school/or whatever. I had a key to my own house and of course preferred to spend the time I could there. I declined the neighbor's offers for dinner. I had some fun my parents would not have approved of, at my own house, with them gone. Teens will enjoy their freedom whenever they get the chance - don't fool yourself. And "rules" don't matter. The arrangement that my parents made though, I think was responsible-enough and I'd be likely to handle the situation the same. Btw, my parents needed to travel. It was not for frivolous reasons. I was use to them being gone for several weeks spread throughout the year.

[Anonymous]

10:57 again. If it was more than a night or two, I bet my parents insisted on paying them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going on a 4-day work trip in two weeks and I'm a single parent. My kid recently got their license and is pretty responsible- do you think it's fine if they stay by themselves while I'm away? This would be the first time they are alone for more than one night, but they are totally fine with it. I'm a little nervous, but they can drive and I don't have to worry about them trashing the house or anything. What do you think?

I would, but not if there is a boyfriend/girlfriend. Do you have friends or neighbors that can check in?

Most teens have sex without an exclusive boyfriend or girlfriend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going on a 4-day work trip in two weeks and I'm a single parent. My kid recently got their license and is pretty responsible- do you think it's fine if they stay by themselves while I'm away? This would be the first time they are alone for more than one night, but they are totally fine with it. I'm a little nervous, but they can drive and I don't have to worry about them trashing the house or anything. What do you think?

No, because, SM. All it takes is one "friend" to announce "no adults at 123 Street, party tonight," and your house is done for.

This would never happen where we live, among my DS friends and acquaintances. He is not interested in partying and drinking, would not want it and he would call the cops. The number of kids who are into partying and drinking where we live is a small minority. His friends are mostly from his sport and they just don’t do those things.

Where do you people live that this would happen?
I suspect it’s actually the wealthy areas… makes me glad we missed the boat on buying in those areas.

If I was gone, yes, my son would have his GF over. But she would not spend the night or lie to her parents. Whatever they would do, they are already doing anyway.

You are living in LA LA Land. All teens lie (part of being a teen), all keep secrets from parents, and it doesn't matter that YOUR kid wouldn't do this. The word will get out on SM and there will be a party at your house, it doesn't matter that your kid didn't start it, ask for it, or even want it

Nope. Will not happen. This isn’t the 80s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was the biggest goody two shoes on the planet and when my parents left me alone for a long weekend, the first thing I did was sneak out and spend the weekend with my boyfriend.

Absolutely not. I don’t care how responsible your kid is. They’re still a kid.

I was a goody two shoes also and when left alone I just took longer showers than normal and danced around the living room with music blasting (my family's version of blasting - you couldn't hear it from outside the house). Maybe I skipped vegetables a couple of nights. Some goody two shoes really ARE good.

You're missing the point. Even a good kid could get sick, fall down, there could be a fire, etc. He can't drive himself to the doctor. HE doesn't need a babysitter but someone else in the house just to sleep or something.

[Anonymous]

It is not believable, the parents are fooling no one when they boast they have come up with a list of rules. Like that's going to matter. Instead when you leave, face reality. Things will happen you'll never know about. Things you would not approve of.

[Anonymous]

It depends on the kid. It is a long enough time that I would only consider if there were a local responsible adult that could do daily check ins, as well as be support if something did go wrong.

My biggest concern is actually the driving. You say it like it’s a good thing, but make sure your kid knows what to do if they get into an accident.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was the biggest goody two shoes on the planet and when my parents left me alone for a long weekend, the first thing I did was sneak out and spend the weekend with my boyfriend.

Absolutely not. I don’t care how responsible your kid is. They’re still a kid.

I was a goody two shoes also and when left alone I just took longer showers than normal and danced around the living room with music blasting (my family's version of blasting - you couldn't hear it from outside the house). Maybe I skipped vegetables a couple of nights. Some goody two shoes really ARE good.

You're missing the point. Even a good kid could get sick, fall down, there could be a fire, etc. He can't drive himself to the doctor. HE doesn't need a babysitter but someone else in the house just to sleep or something.

At 16, I could handle being sick, falling down (crawl to phone to call 911), and if there's a fire, get out. If you're raising your kids right, they can handle these things. At 16 I wasn't going to the doctor for a fever. If I had a medical emergency I'd have called 911.

[Anonymous]

Lol. Hell no.

[Anonymous]

I have a 15 year old, who thinks she could stay alone, and is generally pretty independent, but I don't see myself leaving her alone a year from now. I would probably ask a friend to stay at our house, while I was gone, not to babysit, but just to be an adult present. If I didn't have someone like that, I'd still at least want someone local "on call" for emergencies.

Also, these days you can check in more with cell phones, Ring cameras that let you monitor who is coming and going, and that sort of thing. So I don't think it's unsafe, it's just... I dunno. I wouldn't let her more for my own piece of mind than the kid's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going on a 4-day work trip in two weeks and I'm a single parent. My kid recently got their license and is pretty responsible- do you think it's fine if they stay by themselves while I'm away? This would be the first time they are alone for more than one night, but they are totally fine with it. I'm a little nervous, but they can drive and I don't have to worry about them trashing the house or anything. What do you think?

I would, but not if there is a boyfriend/girlfriend. Do you have friends or neighbors that can check in?

Most teens have sex without an exclusive boyfriend or girlfriend.

I don’t think this is true. But if this kid has a BF/GF, they are already doing it anyway. I’d rather my kid be having sex in a stable relationship than throwing a party or running around town doing drugs. But I’d do whatever I could to not leave a 16 yo home alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It depends on the kid. It is a long enough time that I would only consider if there were a local responsible adult that could do daily check ins, as well as be support if something did go wrong.

My biggest concern is actually the driving. You say it like it’s a good thing, but make sure your kid knows what to do if they get into an accident.

This is my thought exactly. I would not want my newly licensed driver driving around and living on their own while I’m far away. There’s a lot of risk and liability with an inexperienced teenaged driver. If there’s no adult in charge at home, teenager shouldn’t drive while you’re gone.