How to respond to daily reports of bad behavior from kindergarten teacher?

[Anonymous]

Call for an IEP meeting (in writing). Mention the verbal comments from the teacher and say the plan needs revision.

It’s not fair for the teacher to dump this on you when it’s likely because of his disability and the school not supplying the supports they are supposed to. Remind them of this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to get the principal to step in and come up with an intermediary solution while a different placement is being worked on. This is not good for your kid to be constantly not meeting expectations. There are all sorts of solutions. They can send an extra person into the classroom to help manage things, like a student teacher or the school psychologist or assistant principal. They can make your child principal for the day, and have them shadow the principal, to give them a break from the classroom environment, which sounds to be stressful. Or gym teacher for the day. They can pull your child out of the classroom if there is a particular time of day or triggering event that is difficult, perhaps having the school psychologist spend one on one time with them. They can brainstorm and come up with new and better figits, if that’s something that may be useful. These are all things that our public school did when DC was having behavioral problems in elementary school.

It depends on what you mean by misbehaves. If your child has a BIP seems like most incidents are disruptive somehow. Can you elaborate? Are you seeking a new placement?
These are good stop gap measures but first you need to figure out yourself what you think of the current placement and what your goals are here. Your goals cannot be to just stop the emails because obviously there's stuff going on that the teacher feels compelled to write about. Either the teacher needs help, your child needs help or your child needs a new placement.

OP here. The reported behaviors are:

-used glue stick as chapstick and put it all over his face
-ate play doh
-went into girls bathroom
-throwing paper towels on the ground
-scribbling on desk
-drawing on self
-taking another child’s food and/or water bottle
-drinking the teacher’s coffee
-repeatedly touching the classroom TV
-refusing to sit down at his desk or join circle time
-tearing his papers instead of turning them in or doing them
-putting hand soap in his water bottle and shaking it in order to create bubbles
-opening and closing the window in the classroom
-wanting to play with blocks instead of doing the classroom work

First of all, solidarity and good vibes to you, OP. Second, these behaviors fall into either sensory seeking or attention seeking. You probably have sensory diet written into the IEP and BIP. In addition to documenting all of these in a way PPs suggested (frequently, and via email), I would send a specialist for observation every couple of weeks. Can be one of his therapists or educational advocate. You need a very detailed 3rd party report on what happens in school, and more than one, so they can't say it was just a "day off" for the child (which is what I was literally told). The idea is to document that IEP/BIP is not being implemented. I hope you can escalate once you have sufficient documentation to either get a different placement or wrestle an aide from the school district. Your child is not aggressive on un-educatable, he just needs extra attention and sensory needs met throughout the school day.

Before any teacher jumps in to say how hard it is to have 26 kids in K and implement 6-8 IEPs all by a single teacher with no help - yes it is, but ignoring the child is not an option, no matter what your admin tells you about resources shortages. Schools get additional (and not small) funding for every IEP, what they do with that funding is the question to your admin.

[Anonymous]

I would email the teacher each time she says somthing to you or emails you and cc the principal, vp, counselor and others and ask what they are going to do about it and what is their plan? I would not tell them but I'd get an evalaution and private services as well if you aren't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to get the principal to step in and come up with an intermediary solution while a different placement is being worked on. This is not good for your kid to be constantly not meeting expectations. There are all sorts of solutions. They can send an extra person into the classroom to help manage things, like a student teacher or the school psychologist or assistant principal. They can make your child principal for the day, and have them shadow the principal, to give them a break from the classroom environment, which sounds to be stressful. Or gym teacher for the day. They can pull your child out of the classroom if there is a particular time of day or triggering event that is difficult, perhaps having the school psychologist spend one on one time with them. They can brainstorm and come up with new and better figits, if that’s something that may be useful. These are all things that our public school did when DC was having behavioral problems in elementary school.

It depends on what you mean by misbehaves. If your child has a BIP seems like most incidents are disruptive somehow. Can you elaborate? Are you seeking a new placement?
These are good stop gap measures but first you need to figure out yourself what you think of the current placement and what your goals are here. Your goals cannot be to just stop the emails because obviously there's stuff going on that the teacher feels compelled to write about. Either the teacher needs help, your child needs help or your child needs a new placement.

OP here. The reported behaviors are:

-used glue stick as chapstick and put it all over his face
-ate play doh
-went into girls bathroom
-throwing paper towels on the ground
-scribbling on desk
-drawing on self
-taking another child’s food and/or water bottle
-drinking the teacher’s coffee
-repeatedly touching the classroom TV
-refusing to sit down at his desk or join circle time
-tearing his papers instead of turning them in or doing them
-putting hand soap in his water bottle and shaking it in order to create bubbles
-opening and closing the window in the classroom
-wanting to play with blocks instead of doing the classroom work

I emphasize with your post OP and understand how stressful it is to receive daily reports of behaviors.

Like everyone here says, document it for appropriate placement and accommodations. Your school is not meeting his needs. Reach out the to principal to ask why his IEP and BIP are not being implemented.

Secondly, what interventions are in place outside of school? Has your son been diagnosed with any disorders or disabilities? Is he being treated with either private therapy and/or medications? If not, seek private evaluations from a developmental pediatrician or psychiatrist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to get the principal to step in and come up with an intermediary solution while a different placement is being worked on. This is not good for your kid to be constantly not meeting expectations. There are all sorts of solutions. They can send an extra person into the classroom to help manage things, like a student teacher or the school psychologist or assistant principal. They can make your child principal for the day, and have them shadow the principal, to give them a break from the classroom environment, which sounds to be stressful. Or gym teacher for the day. They can pull your child out of the classroom if there is a particular time of day or triggering event that is difficult, perhaps having the school psychologist spend one on one time with them. They can brainstorm and come up with new and better figits, if that’s something that may be useful. These are all things that our public school did when DC was having behavioral problems in elementary school.

It depends on what you mean by misbehaves. If your child has a BIP seems like most incidents are disruptive somehow. Can you elaborate? Are you seeking a new placement?
These are good stop gap measures but first you need to figure out yourself what you think of the current placement and what your goals are here. Your goals cannot be to just stop the emails because obviously there's stuff going on that the teacher feels compelled to write about. Either the teacher needs help, your child needs help or your child needs a new placement.

OP here. The reported behaviors are:

-used glue stick as chapstick and put it all over his face
-ate play doh
-went into girls bathroom
-throwing paper towels on the ground
-scribbling on desk
-drawing on self
-taking another child’s food and/or water bottle
-drinking the teacher’s coffee
-repeatedly touching the classroom TV
-refusing to sit down at his desk or join circle time
-tearing his papers instead of turning them in or doing them
-putting hand soap in his water bottle and shaking it in order to create bubbles
-opening and closing the window in the classroom
-wanting to play with blocks instead of doing the classroom work

OP this doesn't seem too bad at all. I would not seek a change of placement based on these reports. These are all really normal behaviors. It just seems more frequent than many other kids but nothing an experienced teacher shouldn't be able to handle. I would never refer to these behaviors as "bad" or even misbehaving.

DD had a teacher that overreacted in K which made DD feel terrible about herself. It happened really quickly. The school figured out a few years later the teacher was terrible at handling behaviors and gave her additional training and even sent someone in to help her with live training. I wondering if you could request an on outside observer come to the classroom and maybe they could be observing the teacher at the same time.

Your poor child. Sounds like a curious kid who has trouble sitting still. Can you afford a place like Waldorf or a private that has more age appropriate learning in K? Public school Ks are really a lot of sitting and listening which is inappropriate for this age group and very difficult especially for boys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to get the principal to step in and come up with an intermediary solution while a different placement is being worked on. This is not good for your kid to be constantly not meeting expectations. There are all sorts of solutions. They can send an extra person into the classroom to help manage things, like a student teacher or the school psychologist or assistant principal. They can make your child principal for the day, and have them shadow the principal, to give them a break from the classroom environment, which sounds to be stressful. Or gym teacher for the day. They can pull your child out of the classroom if there is a particular time of day or triggering event that is difficult, perhaps having the school psychologist spend one on one time with them. They can brainstorm and come up with new and better figits, if that’s something that may be useful. These are all things that our public school did when DC was having behavioral problems in elementary school.

It depends on what you mean by misbehaves. If your child has a BIP seems like most incidents are disruptive somehow. Can you elaborate? Are you seeking a new placement?
These are good stop gap measures but first you need to figure out yourself what you think of the current placement and what your goals are here. Your goals cannot be to just stop the emails because obviously there's stuff going on that the teacher feels compelled to write about. Either the teacher needs help, your child needs help or your child needs a new placement.

OP here. The reported behaviors are:

-used glue stick as chapstick and put it all over his face
-ate play doh
-went into girls bathroom
-throwing paper towels on the ground
-scribbling on desk
-drawing on self
-taking another child’s food and/or water bottle
-drinking the teacher’s coffee
-repeatedly touching the classroom TV
-refusing to sit down at his desk or join circle time
-tearing his papers instead of turning them in or doing them
-putting hand soap in his water bottle and shaking it in order to create bubbles
-opening and closing the window in the classroom
-wanting to play with blocks instead of doing the classroom work

As someone whose DC didn’t have the motor skills to do a lot of that and got calls about hitting/meltdowns … those don’t sound that bad, if that makes you feel any better! It really sounds like they need a good incentive plan. Do they have one?

To the “doesn’t sound that bad” posters…remember that this is one child in a group of 20+ and one adult. These behaviors are disruptive and not things you see most kindergartners doing. I know this because I taught K for over 20 years.
OP, I agree that you need to document and ask for a meeting sooner rather than later. It is hard to hear (and I personally wouldn’t report all those instances to you) but it is also hard to manage as a general education teacher with so many students.
Please do not as one post suggests, record the interactions with the teacher without her knowledge.

A lot of what was listed sounded really trivial and like it could be handled by a competent teacher. And this kid sounds like a handful but is not throwing desks or hitting anyone. Teacher is out of her depth. OP can you request a different teacher?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to get the principal to step in and come up with an intermediary solution while a different placement is being worked on. This is not good for your kid to be constantly not meeting expectations. There are all sorts of solutions. They can send an extra person into the classroom to help manage things, like a student teacher or the school psychologist or assistant principal. They can make your child principal for the day, and have them shadow the principal, to give them a break from the classroom environment, which sounds to be stressful. Or gym teacher for the day. They can pull your child out of the classroom if there is a particular time of day or triggering event that is difficult, perhaps having the school psychologist spend one on one time with them. They can brainstorm and come up with new and better figits, if that’s something that may be useful. These are all things that our public school did when DC was having behavioral problems in elementary school.

It depends on what you mean by misbehaves. If your child has a BIP seems like most incidents are disruptive somehow. Can you elaborate? Are you seeking a new placement?
These are good stop gap measures but first you need to figure out yourself what you think of the current placement and what your goals are here. Your goals cannot be to just stop the emails because obviously there's stuff going on that the teacher feels compelled to write about. Either the teacher needs help, your child needs help or your child needs a new placement.

OP here. The reported behaviors are:

-used glue stick as chapstick and put it all over his face
-ate play doh
-went into girls bathroom
-throwing paper towels on the ground
-scribbling on desk
-drawing on self
-taking another child’s food and/or water bottle
-drinking the teacher’s coffee
-repeatedly touching the classroom TV
-refusing to sit down at his desk or join circle time
-tearing his papers instead of turning them in or doing them
-putting hand soap in his water bottle and shaking it in order to create bubbles
-opening and closing the window in the classroom
-wanting to play with blocks instead of doing the classroom work

OP this doesn't seem too bad at all. I would not seek a change of placement based on these reports. These are all really normal behaviors. It just seems more frequent than many other kids but nothing an experienced teacher shouldn't be able to handle. I would never refer to these behaviors as "bad" or even misbehaving.

DD had a teacher that overreacted in K which made DD feel terrible about herself. It happened really quickly. The school figured out a few years later the teacher was terrible at handling behaviors and gave her additional training and even sent someone in to help her with live training. I wondering if you could request an on outside observer come to the classroom and maybe they could be observing the teacher at the same time.

Your poor child. Sounds like a curious kid who has trouble sitting still. Can you afford a place like Waldorf or a private that has more age appropriate learning in K? Public school Ks are really a lot of sitting and listening which is inappropriate for this age group and very difficult especially for boys.

I agree. I don’t often think or say this, but this actually sounds like the case of a kid not cut out for the boringness of a K classroom yet - it’s the making bubbles that really gets me! I think a year in a more play-based setting might really help. It’s not too late to redshirt.

[Anonymous]

Count me in as someone who thinks a lot of this is the teacher not adequately handling an active and curious kid. I actually laughed out loud when I read the coffee thing-I would have loved to have seen her face. While I know it’s not funny to you, as someone who’s K boy would run away from teachers in the school and run away from school, and who would react with physical violence when upset-it really seems to me that this teacher is not cut out to handle the challenges of your son, rather than your son behaving badly! Take heart, document everything, and if the teacher keeps up with these non-events every day, I would definitely let the principal know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Count me in as someone who thinks a lot of this is the teacher not adequately handling an active and curious kid. I actually laughed out loud when I read the coffee thing-I would have loved to have seen her face. While I know it’s not funny to you, as someone who’s K boy would run away from teachers in the school and run away from school, and who would react with physical violence when upset-it really seems to me that this teacher is not cut out to handle the challenges of your son, rather than your son behaving badly! Take heart, document everything, and if the teacher keeps up with these non-events every day, I would definitely let the principal know.

yeah, so funny that the adult teacher thought she could have coffee at her job without someone else drinking it.

[Anonymous]

I didn't read the entire thread. Why does he have an IEP? What's in the BIP? I teach K and these sound like annoying and disruptive behaviors yes, but not "change of placement" behaviors. It sounds like he might need sensory breaks and perhaps some additional support from the social worker. Is he medicated at all?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Count me in as someone who thinks a lot of this is the teacher not adequately handling an active and curious kid. I actually laughed out loud when I read the coffee thing-I would have loved to have seen her face. While I know it’s not funny to you, as someone who’s K boy would run away from teachers in the school and run away from school, and who would react with physical violence when upset-it really seems to me that this teacher is not cut out to handle the challenges of your son, rather than your son behaving badly! Take heart, document everything, and if the teacher keeps up with these non-events every day, I would definitely let the principal know.

my thoughts exactly … OP it takes a lot more than the to make an LRE argument so I really think you should request a different class.

[Anonymous]

Another approach -
Request an observation.
I am not sure what school district you are in, but you can have specialist observe your child in their classroom.
They will be able to get a sense quickly on what is happening.

I also agree with others that if this is early in "K", your child will know that they are "Bad" and it will impact their sense of self. I would imagine that if you sat in the classroom for 30 minutes your child's name would be used more than any other name and it will be associated with negative messages.

This will not get better this year without additional hands in that classroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another approach -
Request an observation.
I am not sure what school district you are in, but you can have specialist observe your child in their classroom.
They will be able to get a sense quickly on what is happening.

I also agree with others that if this is early in "K", your child will know that they are "Bad" and it will impact their sense of self. I would imagine that if you sat in the classroom for 30 minutes your child's name would be used more than any other name and it will be associated with negative messages.

This will not get better this year without additional hands in that classroom.

I agree with this.

[Anonymous]

Be polite and say thank you teacher for letting you know. Don't argue back but asks for advice and work together. It is quite frustrating to receive daily report. Pick a few important things to address with your child, and do not need to let your child know every details of daily report. That is stressful for kid, and that harms teacher kid relationship. My DC had good memory of his kindergartener teacher, and he did not know that how many complaints/messafes/phone calls I have received from teacher that year. I only pick a few things to address with my child.