Assisted living communities with a vibrant vibe?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:CCRC seems crazy expensive.

Relative is on a fixed income.

I’m definitely looking for a community with scalable care (seems common)—but everyone seems really frail.

If relative lives alone, they won’t manage their nutrition—so they need a place that provides meals and makes sure they aren’t skipping meals.

They have fallen before, although not recently. We are worried they might fall again if left alone and nobody would notice. They can do stairs, but not without risk—which is why we want them to move to AL (and why none of us can have them in our homes since they can’t do stairs unassisted).

They don’t drive anymore, which is a big reason why they would benefit from AL.

It’s become difficult to handle their bills. Another plus of AL.

You may want to look at an independent living place (that also offers higher levels of care). That way, it would be cheaper, but you could hire a nurse for meds, etc. (I thought about doing that for my mom who is super active and "young" but is in the early/mid stages of dementia.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can’t afford a buy-in community.

AL is far more expensive - generally $10k/ month.

?

Not what I’m seeing.

Buy-in communities are $100-200k plus monthly fees.

ALs start at $5k in the dc metro area.

$5k for AL in the DC area has to mean a small group home (maybe 5-10 rooms max). It’s going to be very basic at that cost. Most of the larger/fancier places start at about twice that and can easily go up depending on the care level needed.

I’m not looking at fancy.

And I’m not looking for a lot of care at the entry level: just apartment, meals, and staff that can alert someone if they fall or aren’t eating.

I'm in Woodbridge, but there are lots of very nice AL places that are 50-100 people for under $6k/month. Minimum buy in. Everything included. (Meals, med distribution, trips, etc.)

[Anonymous]

Stay far away from Goodwin House in Virginia. It's looks pretty until you need care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leisure world doesn’t offer assisted living. It’s independent living.

Most assisted living places I’ve seen offer different levels of care, and I am not worried about nursing home level of care at the moment.

They basically need a community of their peers plus meals and someone to notice if they fall, don’t eat, or decline.

Relatives aren’t local and nobody is equipped to provide such care since everyone works and nobody has a home with an extra bedroom, accessible bathroom, etc.

Right, but if your loved one currently needs someone to prepare their meals, do daily (or more frequent) check ins, assist them by making it not necessary for them to do dishes or housework or laundry, then it's reasonable to expect that within a few more years, they'll need some assistance bathing without falling, or perhaps need to use a walker (if there are currently concerns about falling, it is only a matter of time- a few years?- before walking assistance might be needed), and on and on it goes. An assisted living center full of healthy elderly people who don't need much assistance doesn't really exist UNLESS that center kicks those people out when they start to need a higher level of car, which is not going to be a great option for your loved one. You need to look for a place that has a balance- yes, some more healthy and active residents, but also residents who need more help with their activities of daily living.

If no one needs any help or assistance with living, it's not assisted living.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:CCRC seems crazy expensive.

Relative is on a fixed income.

I’m definitely looking for a community with scalable care (seems common)—but everyone seems really frail.

If relative lives alone, they won’t manage their nutrition—so they need a place that provides meals and makes sure they aren’t skipping meals.

They have fallen before, although not recently. We are worried they might fall again if left alone and nobody would notice. They can do stairs, but not without risk—which is why we want them to move to AL (and why none of us can have them in our homes since they can’t do stairs unassisted).

They don’t drive anymore, which is a big reason why they would benefit from AL.

It’s become difficult to handle their bills. Another plus of AL.

Your relative- and you- may not want to admit this, but they are in the same category as these frail individuals you are seeing. They can't live safely alone and they have declined cognitively, and physically. No one thinks they're as old as the other old people, and no one thinks their mom or dad is as old as the other old people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:CCRC seems crazy expensive.

Relative is on a fixed income.

I’m definitely looking for a community with scalable care (seems common)—but everyone seems really frail.

If relative lives alone, they won’t manage their nutrition—so they need a place that provides meals and makes sure they aren’t skipping meals.

They have fallen before, although not recently. We are worried they might fall again if left alone and nobody would notice. They can do stairs, but not without risk—which is why we want them to move to AL (and why none of us can have them in our homes since they can’t do stairs unassisted).

They don’t drive anymore, which is a big reason why they would benefit from AL.

It’s become difficult to handle their bills. Another plus of AL.

So they want/need something, but can't afford it?

No.

They can afford AL, but they don’t like it. They think everyone is too old/too frail.

AL is $5-7k/month where I’ve looked. Do-able, but they think it’s a place for old people to wait to die.

Thats tough, because honestly, that's what it is, and on some level they know that. Many people resist going to AL. Maybe having an in home aide come for 4hr in the morning and 4hr in the afternoons would be better for them for the next few months/ years until they accept that it's time for AL?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stay far away from Goodwin House in Virginia. It's looks pretty until you need care.

Other posters on other threads have said good things about GH. I'm sorry that wasn't your experience

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stay far away from Goodwin House in Virginia. It's looks pretty until you need care.

Other posters on other threads have said good things about GH. I'm sorry that wasn't your experience

We're they on the memory care unit? Very few doctors on staff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Check out Collington in Mitchellville Md.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m bumping this old post because it has great info. Does anyone know of 60-something couples living in Independent Living at Knollwood or other similar CCRCs in the DC area, or Maplewood Park Place in Bethesda? Can active older adults really live pretty independently, or is it depressing? Thanks.

60-somethings might move into a new place (Carnegie, Grandview, Pinnacle) that are selling a lifestyle, but the older places are full of OLD people (late 70, all kinds of 80s, and probably some 90s), and 60-something probably won't want to live there

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stay far away from Goodwin House in Virginia. It's looks pretty until you need care.

Other posters on other threads have said good things about GH. I'm sorry that wasn't your experience

We're they on the memory care unit? Very few doctors on staff.

Can you explain why that's an issue for memory care specifically?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m bumping this old post because it has great info. Does anyone know of 60-something couples living in Independent Living at Knollwood or other similar CCRCs in the DC area, or Maplewood Park Place in Bethesda? Can active older adults really live pretty independently, or is it depressing? Thanks.

60-somethings might move into a new place (Carnegie, Grandview, Pinnacle) that are selling a lifestyle, but the older places are full of OLD people (late 70, all kinds of 80s, and probably some 90s), and 60-something probably won't want to live there

The younger people living in most of these places have chronic or worsening conditions. They are not going to be plying pickleball or going out to play golf.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stay far away from Goodwin House in Virginia. It's looks pretty until you need care.

Really I'm in Arlington and everyone says it's the best around.