just can't relate to Potomac anymore

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is giving me hope, both that DEI-overload is going to end and that there are other people who feel like me that DEI shouldn’t be as big a part of a child’s school life as it is currently is in many schools.

It is ending. Look at Colleges starting to change and high schools. Like so many other exercises, it was another educational fad, although expensive and harmful to many

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP means: minorities don’t belong at Potomac. Any group that threatens “whiteness” is unwelcome at the school. Anything in society that threatens “whiteness”
is also unwelcome.

OP is among the many at Potomac who believe in being "colorblind." It's quite parochial and many people like OP will use the DEI and "affirmative action" argument to complain about why students of color are able to get into better colleges than their kids. Meanwhile, nothing really is done to give students of color, or really students of any color, who may come from more underprivileged backgrounds the same opportunities that the above-average wealthy students are getting. They come in at the bottom and are left to feel less valuable throughout their time there. This played out with the gravest consequences a few years ago and nothing has changed since. Thanks to leadership and parents like OP.

I'm black and other than being accepted (and funded) to attend the school what else are black students supposed to be "given"? It certainly makes sense to provide necessary academic and social support, but what else? I mean, many of the black private school kids are already as wealthy as their white peers, and the truly underprivileged ones would likely feel just as out of sorts at a wealthy public school. These feelings are being "less valuable" are just about being less well-heeled than other students --- probably doesn't feel good but they are getting an excellent education and a springboard into a world that will allow them to give their eventual kids an entirely different experience.

I guess what I'm saying is, we need to look at this inter-generationally. These kids are having their lives changed in a way that will redound to the benefit of their descendants. And those descendants, one day, will likely be among the wealthy, privileged set that their forefather/mother felt somewhat alienated from so many years ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is giving me hope, both that DEI-overload is going to end and that there are other people who feel like me that DEI shouldn’t be as big a part of a child’s school life as it is currently is in many schools.

It is ending. Look at Colleges starting to change and high schools. Like so many other exercises, it was another educational fad, although expensive and harmful to many

DEI was always more of a project of white folks (and the only blacks they know) rather than normal middle-class black folks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having been at two other schools with DEI - it's a hard thing to get right.

One school has done a great job and started over a decade ago, going slow, being thoughtful - training for teachers, tweaks in curriculum, broader sets of books in library, speakers, hiring. Not everyone buys in but it is something where much of the progress has been slowly woven into the fabric without taking over. It bugs me that there will always be "those parents" who will always see the hiring of a person of color as a DEI hire, though.

The other (more prominent) school comes up with big initiatives and actions that flame out and disappear. It all feels "for show". That school already had more diversity than the first. I don't know how parents/students feel about DEI at the school or these initiatives.

I feel like the first school has been more genuine and made more progress.

My child’s elementary teacher this year was a new hire who turned out to be abysmal and by far the worst teacher in elementary. It has done real harm to a class full of students including my child. We have no other explanation for this situation besides a DEI hire. True or not, this is the perception.

But this sort of thing happens with white teachers too....why blame it on their skin color. Why can't it just be a bad hire? Why do you need to equate it to DEI. We have had two horrible teachers for my kids (over many years) and one was a person of color and the other wasn't. I don't blame the POC bad teacher on DEI - she was just a really bad fit. And to be honest, the parents that complained and made it about race did nobody any favors - because the school (and me too) had to discount those opinions immediately. It's the tangible defaults/misteps that matter - so blaming things on DEI and not focusing on what criteria are used to evaluate a good hire or to evaluate current teachers helps nobody. Same with leadership positions. Of the few that fell short (not horrible but not inspiring) some were POC and others weren't. they all left the same way....with a note saying they chose to transition to something else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having been at two other schools with DEI - it's a hard thing to get right.

One school has done a great job and started over a decade ago, going slow, being thoughtful - training for teachers, tweaks in curriculum, broader sets of books in library, speakers, hiring. Not everyone buys in but it is something where much of the progress has been slowly woven into the fabric without taking over. It bugs me that there will always be "those parents" who will always see the hiring of a person of color as a DEI hire, though.

The other (more prominent) school comes up with big initiatives and actions that flame out and disappear. It all feels "for show". That school already had more diversity than the first. I don't know how parents/students feel about DEI at the school or these initiatives.

I feel like the first school has been more genuine and made more progress.

My child’s elementary teacher this year was a new hire who turned out to be abysmal and by far the worst teacher in elementary. It has done real harm to a class full of students including my child. We have no other explanation for this situation besides a DEI hire. True or not, this is the perception.

I hate to break it to you, but not all white teachers are good hires. My kids attend an independent Catholic school with all white teachers and some are good, some are mediocre and some are bad. Parents question how the bad ones made it through the interview process.

In the setting of current DEI initiatives it is a failure though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having been at two other schools with DEI - it's a hard thing to get right.

One school has done a great job and started over a decade ago, going slow, being thoughtful - training for teachers, tweaks in curriculum, broader sets of books in library, speakers, hiring. Not everyone buys in but it is something where much of the progress has been slowly woven into the fabric without taking over. It bugs me that there will always be "those parents" who will always see the hiring of a person of color as a DEI hire, though.

The other (more prominent) school comes up with big initiatives and actions that flame out and disappear. It all feels "for show". That school already had more diversity than the first. I don't know how parents/students feel about DEI at the school or these initiatives.

I feel like the first school has been more genuine and made more progress.

My child’s elementary teacher this year was a new hire who turned out to be abysmal and by far the worst teacher in elementary. It has done real harm to a class full of students including my child. We have no other explanation for this situation besides a DEI hire. True or not, this is the perception.

But this sort of thing happens with white teachers too....why blame it on their skin color. Why can't it just be a bad hire? Why do you need to equate it to DEI. We have had two horrible teachers for my kids (over many years) and one was a person of color and the other wasn't. I don't blame the POC bad teacher on DEI - she was just a really bad fit. And to be honest, the parents that complained and made it about race did nobody any favors - because the school (and me too) had to discount those opinions immediately. It's the tangible defaults/misteps that matter - so blaming things on DEI and not focusing on what criteria are used to evaluate a good hire or to evaluate current teachers helps nobody. Same with leadership positions. Of the few that fell short (not horrible but not inspiring) some were POC and others weren't. they all left the same way....with a note saying they chose to transition to something else.

The perception is there due to prominent DEI initiatives. The Claudine Gay press this year doesn't help the situation either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is giving me hope, both that DEI-overload is going to end and that there are other people who feel like me that DEI shouldn’t be as big a part of a child’s school life as it is currently is in many schools.

It is ending. Look at Colleges starting to change and high schools. Like so many other exercises, it was another educational fad, although expensive and harmful to many

DEI was always more of a project of white folks (and the only blacks they know) rather than normal middle-class black folks.

Huh? Our school hung DEI out on full display via Ibram X Kendi and was led by educated POC alum and professionals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP means: minorities don’t belong at Potomac. Any group that threatens “whiteness” is unwelcome at the school. Anything in society that threatens “whiteness”
is also unwelcome.

OP is among the many at Potomac who believe in being "colorblind." It's quite parochial and many people like OP will use the DEI and "affirmative action" argument to complain about why students of color are able to get into better colleges than their kids. Meanwhile, nothing really is done to give students of color, or really students of any color, who may come from more underprivileged backgrounds the same opportunities that the above-average wealthy students are getting. They come in at the bottom and are left to feel less valuable throughout their time there. This played out with the gravest consequences a few years ago and nothing has changed since. Thanks to leadership and parents like OP.

This is incorrect - at least currently. Children from underprivileged backgrounds who receive FA, receive the same % of aid for everything - uniforms, lunch, after school programs, etc. and not even the teachers are made aware. Potomac has done very well at providing opportunities to ensure all children feel valued.

Oh, I see, getting uniforms and the privilege of participating in afterschool programs is all that is required to feel included? Considering you mentioned those two things, I assume you have not yet had a child go through US, where they are denied entry into the Honor Council or the advanced econ classes. Potomac has not, as you so unequivocally claim, done very well at providing opportunities for inclusion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is giving me hope, both that DEI-overload is going to end and that there are other people who feel like me that DEI shouldn’t be as big a part of a child’s school life as it is currently is in many schools.

It is ending. Look at Colleges starting to change and high schools. Like so many other exercises, it was another educational fad, although expensive and harmful to many

DEI was always more of a project of white folks (and the only blacks they know) rather than normal middle-class black folks.

Huh? Our school hung DEI out on full display via Ibram X Kendi and was led by educated POC alum and professionals.

These are not regular middle-class black folks. They are the "black folks you know."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having been at two other schools with DEI - it's a hard thing to get right.

One school has done a great job and started over a decade ago, going slow, being thoughtful - training for teachers, tweaks in curriculum, broader sets of books in library, speakers, hiring. Not everyone buys in but it is something where much of the progress has been slowly woven into the fabric without taking over. It bugs me that there will always be "those parents" who will always see the hiring of a person of color as a DEI hire, though.

The other (more prominent) school comes up with big initiatives and actions that flame out and disappear. It all feels "for show". That school already had more diversity than the first. I don't know how parents/students feel about DEI at the school or these initiatives.

I feel like the first school has been more genuine and made more progress.

My child’s elementary teacher this year was a new hire who turned out to be abysmal and by far the worst teacher in elementary. It has done real harm to a class full of students including my child. We have no other explanation for this situation besides a DEI hire. True or not, this is the perception.

But this sort of thing happens with white teachers too....why blame it on their skin color. Why can't it just be a bad hire? Why do you need to equate it to DEI. We have had two horrible teachers for my kids (over many years) and one was a person of color and the other wasn't. I don't blame the POC bad teacher on DEI - she was just a really bad fit. And to be honest, the parents that complained and made it about race did nobody any favors - because the school (and me too) had to discount those opinions immediately. It's the tangible defaults/misteps that matter - so blaming things on DEI and not focusing on what criteria are used to evaluate a good hire or to evaluate current teachers helps nobody. Same with leadership positions. Of the few that fell short (not horrible but not inspiring) some were POC and others weren't. they all left the same way....with a note saying they chose to transition to something else.

This is why DEI is bad for everyone, even those it purports to help. With DEI, a bad hire who is a POC will automatically be considered a DEI hire. Any POC hired will have the label of being a DEI hire, whether that person was hired based on merit or skin color. Without DEI and no racial preference being given, a bad hire will just be a bad hire regardless of color. The time for DEI is over, it's divisive and unfair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP means: minorities don’t belong at Potomac. Any group that threatens “whiteness” is unwelcome at the school. Anything in society that threatens “whiteness”
is also unwelcome.

OP is among the many at Potomac who believe in being "colorblind." It's quite parochial and many people like OP will use the DEI and "affirmative action" argument to complain about why students of color are able to get into better colleges than their kids. Meanwhile, nothing really is done to give students of color, or really students of any color, who may come from more underprivileged backgrounds the same opportunities that the above-average wealthy students are getting. They come in at the bottom and are left to feel less valuable throughout their time there. This played out with the gravest consequences a few years ago and nothing has changed since. Thanks to leadership and parents like OP.

This is incorrect - at least currently. Children from underprivileged backgrounds who receive FA, receive the same % of aid for everything - uniforms, lunch, after school programs, etc. and not even the teachers are made aware. Potomac has done very well at providing opportunities to ensure all children feel valued.

Oh, I see, getting uniforms and the privilege of participating in afterschool programs is all that is required to feel included? Considering you mentioned those two things, I assume you have not yet had a child go through US, where they are denied entry into the Honor Council or the advanced econ classes. Potomac has not, as you so unequivocally claim, done very well at providing opportunities for inclusion.

Please be specific about what exactly you would like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP means: minorities don’t belong at Potomac. Any group that threatens “whiteness” is unwelcome at the school. Anything in society that threatens “whiteness”
is also unwelcome.

OP is among the many at Potomac who believe in being "colorblind." It's quite parochial and many people like OP will use the DEI and "affirmative action" argument to complain about why students of color are able to get into better colleges than their kids. Meanwhile, nothing really is done to give students of color, or really students of any color, who may come from more underprivileged backgrounds the same opportunities that the above-average wealthy students are getting. They come in at the bottom and are left to feel less valuable throughout their time there. This played out with the gravest consequences a few years ago and nothing has changed since. Thanks to leadership and parents like OP.

I'm black and other than being accepted (and funded) to attend the school what else are black students supposed to be "given"? It certainly makes sense to provide necessary academic and social support, but what else? I mean, many of the black private school kids are already as wealthy as their white peers, and the truly underprivileged ones would likely feel just as out of sorts at a wealthy public school. These feelings are being "less valuable" are just about being less well-heeled than other students --- probably doesn't feel good but they are getting an excellent education and a springboard into a world that will allow them to give their eventual kids an entirely different experience.

I guess what I'm saying is, we need to look at this inter-generationally. These kids are having their lives changed in a way that will redound to the benefit of their descendants. And those descendants, one day, will likely be among the wealthy, privileged set that their forefather/mother felt somewhat alienated from so many years ago.

We are not disagreeing here. You came to Potomac already well-prepared. If you are highly intelligent or gifted, regardless of the color of your skin, then you do not experience what I am talking about. I am talking about the exclusion from important opportunities that go to only the privileged. Just look at the rolls of the advanced classes and exclusive ECs. You probably haven't experienced the exclusion. And for that I am happy for you. My children did. The feeling of not being good enough to be there can, did, have tragic consequences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having been at two other schools with DEI - it's a hard thing to get right.

One school has done a great job and started over a decade ago, going slow, being thoughtful - training for teachers, tweaks in curriculum, broader sets of books in library, speakers, hiring. Not everyone buys in but it is something where much of the progress has been slowly woven into the fabric without taking over. It bugs me that there will always be "those parents" who will always see the hiring of a person of color as a DEI hire, though.

The other (more prominent) school comes up with big initiatives and actions that flame out and disappear. It all feels "for show". That school already had more diversity than the first. I don't know how parents/students feel about DEI at the school or these initiatives.

I feel like the first school has been more genuine and made more progress.

My child’s elementary teacher this year was a new hire who turned out to be abysmal and by far the worst teacher in elementary. It has done real harm to a class full of students including my child. We have no other explanation for this situation besides a DEI hire. True or not, this is the perception.

But this sort of thing happens with white teachers too....why blame it on their skin color. Why can't it just be a bad hire? Why do you need to equate it to DEI. We have had two horrible teachers for my kids (over many years) and one was a person of color and the other wasn't. I don't blame the POC bad teacher on DEI - she was just a really bad fit. And to be honest, the parents that complained and made it about race did nobody any favors - because the school (and me too) had to discount those opinions immediately. It's the tangible defaults/misteps that matter - so blaming things on DEI and not focusing on what criteria are used to evaluate a good hire or to evaluate current teachers helps nobody. Same with leadership positions. Of the few that fell short (not horrible but not inspiring) some were POC and others weren't. they all left the same way....with a note saying they chose to transition to something else.

This is why DEI is bad for everyone, even those it purports to help. With DEI, a bad hire who is a POC will automatically be considered a DEI hire. Any POC hired will have the label of being a DEI hire, whether that person was hired based on merit or skin color. Without DEI and no racial preference being given, a bad hire will just be a bad hire regardless of color. The time for DEI is over, it's divisive and unfair.

Well said.

[Anonymous]

We left our school over it. My kid just couldn't take it anymore. They wanted to just be at a normal learning environment.

[Anonymous]

We could all use a little more "violent silence". No I don't need to know the school's political perspective on every event that happens in the world.