graduated from college but not working.

Anonymous
OP--I think you should be super proud of him. He has saved money, he has clear goals, and he has a practical approach to targeting his travels to locations where he can make his money stretch farthest. That all demonstrates great executive functioning skills. My biggest regret in middle age is that I did not travel more extensively in my early 20s when one's living standards are a lot lower and you don't have the encumbrances of relationships, mortgages, pets to make it difficult. He will learn a lot of just basic life skills doing this and he may very well find some great gig work (or longer opportunities). He sounds like he really has his act together.
Anonymous
Lucky him. Sounds great? why the rush into the rat race anyway?
He has a CS degree from UF, be proud. He will be fine!
Anonymous
Why isn’t he paying for his own health care?
Anonymous
because she likely can cover him thru the family plan for no extra money. you new here?
Anonymous
He won't be eligible for new grad listings after that year and will be competing with the general market which is very competitive at the moment.

Is he able to postpone his start date for any of those offers?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:because she likely can cover him thru the family plan for no extra money. you new here?


Can still allocate the cost to him even if small.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:because she likely can cover him thru the family plan for no extra money. you new here?


Can still allocate the cost to him even if small.


Why does he need to be punished? Especially if he isn't costing his family, if other children are still on the health care plan?

My parents made sure I stayed on the plan since I had a younger sibling. I wanted to do it my way and be independent, I'm thankful that were able to provide insurance up until I aged out. One less expense.

Why make life 'hard' for someone with a plan thats seemingly been a great student and loving son? Why?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My DS graduated from college one semester early in December '23 with a degree in CS from University of Florida and received several offers. He turned down all of them and decided to use the money he saved from three previous internships, 50K, to travel the world and work on his physical appearance (i.e. working with a physical fitness instructor) and pick up his guitar hobby again. He doesn't plan to get a job until December '24. His exact words to me were "I want to be the best version of myself physically and emotionally in the next twelve months". Is it normal for young people these days to take a break for a year before entering the workforce or grad school?


I'm curious to learn more about what he did that led up to college? Was he working summer jobs? College jobs? Internships? Did he work hard in high school? Take a lot of advance classes? Have interests outside of school? I ask because it sounds like he has burned out and wants to take time off before he has to get back into the intensity of a job.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:because she likely can cover him thru the family plan for no extra money. you new here?


Can still allocate the cost to him even if small.


Why does he need to be punished? Especially if he isn't costing his family, if other children are still on the health care plan?

My parents made sure I stayed on the plan since I had a younger sibling. I wanted to do it my way and be independent, I'm thankful that were able to provide insurance up until I aged out. One less expense.

Why make life 'hard' for someone with a plan thats seemingly been a great student and loving son? Why?


An adult paying your own bills isn't "punishment". It's maturity.
Anonymous
I think it’s fine.

I went to Japan to teach English after graduation, well, because I had a worthless arts degree and really didn’t know what to do next. I spent too much time there and it took many years for me to figure out my career, but I did manage to pay down my student loans while living cheaply and eventually figured out a career after returning to the U.S.

Comparatively speaking, OP’s son will be more than fine. He has decades of rat race ahead of him. One year to gain international perspective won’t hurt him.

The post asking how OPs son will take care of his health is LOL. Have people never been abroad? The healthier diets paired with walking/biking all over the place is plenty enough taking care of himself especially for a young adult.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I think it’s fine.

I went to Japan to teach English after graduation, well, because I had a worthless arts degree and really didn’t know what to do next. I spent too much time there and it took many years for me to figure out my career, but I did manage to pay down my student loans while living cheaply and eventually figured out a career after returning to the U.S.

Comparatively speaking, OP’s son will be more than fine. He has decades of rat race ahead of him. One year to gain international perspective won’t hurt him.

The post asking how OPs son will take care of his health is LOL. Have people never been abroad? The healthier diets paired with walking/biking all over the place is plenty enough taking care of himself especially for a young adult.


Also, I imagine out-of-pocket healthcare is probably inexpensive in Vietnam. Plenty of stories of people traveling to Thailand, Panama or India (medical tourism) and paying out-of-pocket at luxury hospitals, and still it costs less than the co-pays and other charges for the procedure in the US.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My DS graduated from college one semester early in December '23 with a degree in CS from University of Florida and received several offers. He turned down all of them and decided to use the money he saved from three previous internships, 50K, to travel the world and work on his physical appearance (i.e. working with a physical fitness instructor) and pick up his guitar hobby again. He doesn't plan to get a job until December '24. His exact words to me were "I want to be the best version of myself physically and emotionally in the next twelve months". Is it normal for young people these days to take a break for a year before entering the workforce or grad school?


I'm curious to learn more about what he did that led up to college? Was he working summer jobs? College jobs? Internships? Did he work hard in high school? Take a lot of advance classes? Have interests outside of school? I ask because it sounds like he has burned out and wants to take time off before he has to get back into the intensity of a job.


He was an athlete in HS, recruited to play in D1, but a serious injury sidelined him for good. He was a good, not great student in HS, but he did take about 5 AP classes. CS just seems easy for him. He had three internships in his freshman, sophomore, and junior years. After college graduation, he just decided he needed to take a long break to travel the world with the money that he saved from those internships.

Updated: DS and his buddies arrived in Vietnam last week, and they have a budget of $200/day for lodging, meal, travel, $50 per person. They are living a good life in Vietnam. They had just celebrated the Lunar New Year and had a great time there.
Anonymous
Perfect time to do this, before being tied to a job, relationship, bills/mortgage. Good for him.
Anonymous
Good for your son! Graduated early, is paying for the trips with his own money and is gaining life experience and wonderful memories.

And he has a plan to get a job down the road.

This is the opposite of failure to launch. The kid really seems to have it together!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Keep him on your health insurance but other than that don’t give him any money


+1

I’d be disappointed at turning down such fast track jobs to go travels

My friends and I all did banking or consulting right away, plus lots of fun vacations in between projects and deals.
We also were able to save a ton of money, pay off any student debts and pay for b school later.
Always valued travel, many hard workers do, but didn’t need to quit for 3-12 mos to do so.
post reply Forum Index » Adult Children
Message Quick Reply
Go to: