Why isn’t it socially acceptable to sit out of board games?

[Anonymous]

OP, based on your post, I get the impression that this happens to you frequently. Certainly often enough that you are very intensely angry about it.

So, OP, you need to start socializing with new people who are not going to suggest board games as part of any group gathering.

I'm not being snarky or facetious here, I really mean it. Make friends for whom this isn't an activity they're going to suggest.

When the game lovers are your family, it should be even easier to decline as they go ahead--they're family and anyone should be able to tell family, "Hey, you know that's not my thing. I'm going to go read/check out what's on TV in the other room" or "I'll hang over here with my phone/a book/the kids, you go ahead without me." Bow out and don't engage in any back-and-forth about it; let them label you as "cousin who doesn't do games" because, well, you are, and that's fine! Let them play and just go to another room or sit nearby and do whatever, and if they press you -- yeah, exit the room.

But with friends, you can choose your friends. If you have gaming friends, then see those people only when you're all going out to, say, a movie or show, and not when it's a gathering at someone's home. If you keep going to friend gatherings and they keep playing games and you continue to be stressed every time, well, that's on you, at that point; if you're pretty assured there will be games, but you still attend, you are just placing yourself where you'll be miserable.

[Anonymous]

I am soooo happy to learn there are other board game haters. I truly detest them. I even offer to do the dishes at family events so I can avoid them! They are so long, boring, unpleasant, just no!!!!! I used to give in to the pressure but now I just don’t care. I do like puzzles so try to escape there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like board games--love cards. But, some of these games have gotten complicated. If it takes me more than 10 minutes to figure it out, I do not want to play.

I already have a full time job don't need to learn another "competency" for something I am not getting paid for.
-Another board game hater

This. I also loathe board games and cards. I'll play Candyland if one of my kids needs someone to play with (hate it though), or charades at family gatherings. But no way am I trying to learn new set of rules or playing some long, boring game like Monopoly.

[Anonymous]

I've never known a smart, intellectually curious person who didn't like board games. I can see not liking a particular board game, but when I think to all of our family on both sides, friends, neighborhoods, etc. the smart, interesting ones all like board games.

[Anonymous]

No reason to not host your own events.

I would love attending philosophical salons if the people aren’t pompous jerks. In grad school, it was roughly 50/50 smart people who love exchanging ideas and people who thought they were smarter than everyone else so they came to lecture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've never known a smart, intellectually curious person who didn't like board games. I can see not liking a particular board game, but when I think to all of our family on both sides, friends, neighborhoods, etc. the smart, interesting ones all like board games.

Agreed. I don’t enjoy poker, spades in general, but I love board games even when I’m terrible at a particular one. Board games are also great people watching opportunities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate, no, *loathe*, board games. To me, they are mind numbing. At family or friend events, I’m more than happy to sit amongst the group playing and spectate, and to contribute to any ancillary conversation that may be happening. But no! I’m expected to “take one for the team” and join in. It’s just a game, after all. It won’t kill me to play a hand of Uno.

Why can’t I just sit it out? Why don’t we allow people this grace without giving them a browbeating and all but insisting? Why can’t the others “take one for the team”and just gather around and socialize? Pick a topic and get philosophical. That’s what I’d want to do. Or put on some music and dance! It’s totally fine when people don’t want to have deep conversation, or if they don’t want dance. But say you don’t want to play the game and everything goes to hell.

Why?

Because you’re being antisocial by not participating. And many games are more fun the more people who play. And people are generally put off by insufferable behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like board games--love cards. But, some of these games have gotten complicated. If it takes me more than 10 minutes to figure it out, I do not want to play.

I already have a full time job don't need to learn another "competency" for something I am not getting paid for.
-Another board game hater

This. I also loathe board games and cards. I'll play Candyland if one of my kids needs someone to play with (hate it though), or charades at family gatherings. But no way am I trying to learn new set of rules or playing some long, boring game like Monopoly.

So you’re addictive to the short dopamine hits of phone games and DCUM.

To make Monopoly more interesting, raise the stakes. Use real money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like board games--love cards. But, some of these games have gotten complicated. If it takes me more than 10 minutes to figure it out, I do not want to play.

I already have a full time job don't need to learn another "competency" for something I am not getting paid for.
-Another board game hater

This. I also loathe board games and cards. I'll play Candyland if one of my kids needs someone to play with (hate it though), or charades at family gatherings. But no way am I trying to learn new set of rules or playing some long, boring game like Monopoly.

So you’re addictive to the short dopamine hits of phone games and DCUM.

To make Monopoly more interesting, raise the stakes. Use real money.

*addicted obvi

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like board games--love cards. But, some of these games have gotten complicated. If it takes me more than 10 minutes to figure it out, I do not want to play.

I already have a full time job don't need to learn another "competency" for something I am not getting paid for.
-Another board game hater

This. I also loathe board games and cards. I'll play Candyland if one of my kids needs someone to play with (hate it though), or charades at family gatherings. But no way am I trying to learn new set of rules or playing some long, boring game like Monopoly.

Monopoly is a terrible example and shows me how little you know about board games. Most board game lovers I know (and I know many) would never waste their time on Monopoly. Once you understand the basic strategy, Monopoly is mostly a luck game. SO SO many better options.

[Anonymous]

Op, answering the question in your title: I think it IS socially acceptable to sit out of board games.

I love board games. I also think people can sit out.

[Anonymous]

I absolutely love games and I miss every single one. My youngest starts melting down after dinner. I can’t sit and play because she’d sit with me and throw cards. So I just have to play with her while everyone else gets to play games. And then I put her to bed. Once I’m done my oldest is ready for bed. And when that is over, everyone is done with games and heading home. It’s like some cruel joke.

So OP maybe you need a 2 year old (who would scream than let dad do bedtime) to get you out of games.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've never known a smart, intellectually curious person who didn't like board games. I can see not liking a particular board game, but when I think to all of our family on both sides, friends, neighborhoods, etc. the smart, interesting ones all like board games.

PP.

I'm objectively smart, educated, and incredibly verbal. But I also have never succeeded in life, and losing at something as insignificant as a board just reinforces to myself how stupid I am. I would rather read or write a book.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've never known a smart, intellectually curious person who didn't like board games. I can see not liking a particular board game, but when I think to all of our family on both sides, friends, neighborhoods, etc. the smart, interesting ones all like board games.

NP - I'm very smart and intellectually curious, but I don't like sitting still for hours. So, sure, in theory it would be fun to play a game and chat with friends, the reality isn't physically comfortable for me. I have other smart friends who feel the same way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've never known a smart, intellectually curious person who didn't like board games. I can see not liking a particular board game, but when I think to all of our family on both sides, friends, neighborhoods, etc. the smart, interesting ones all like board games.

I like and play board games. But this ridiculous attitude is why I know many smart and interesting people who despise them. It’s not the game itself, it’s the people who espouse them. Board game pushers are some of the most socially clueless and entitled people around.