Where to Find A PT Cook/Housekeeper: Can’t do It All With Kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op this seems like a perfect job for a SAHM whose kids are older. Ask on neighborhood FB group. I’d love a job like this.

Out of curiosity, what do you think the going rate would be for this (on the books?)

-A SAHM with older kids.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Between work and kids I’m drowning at home and would like to hire someone 20 hours a week to cook meals and clean/keep the house tidy.

Any suggestions where I can look or post for this kind of role? I haven’t had luck with care..com since the pandemic for other roles.

Then you aren't trying as most women manage very well every damn day. Stop whining and complaining and get organized like the rest of us!

If she can afford it, why not find the help she needs? I have a FT nanny that cleans our house and feeds the kids dinner since my kids are in FT school and she only has them 3.5 hours a day. We pay her 35 hours a week and she works 12-6:30 every day.

That’s kind of sad that your kids have dinner with the nanny every day

No it isn’t. This obsession with having meals together as a family is all American and really weird to me. I spend plenty of time with my kids (especially since I never have to clean the house or do other chores) where we can talk, play, snuggle, etc. My family does not need to have dinner together

Imagine me living in France, posting on a French board, that some French tradition is just so French and really weird.

That would be fine if someone criticized your life style saying that “it’s sad your kids never have dinner with you”. I was explaining that this obsession with having dinner together as a family as the holy grail for spending time with the family is not all that is thought to be. In other countries meal time is for eating (as it is for most American families I see… not much talking happening around little kids meals). I am very close to my parents and we did not have mandatory dinners together.
Similarly, I am very close to my kids and husband, but we only eat dinner together 2-3 days a week.

I’m pretty sure that sharing a meal together at the same time is universal. Tell me a country where it’s normal not to eat together.

I am Italian and the only times I ate together with my family (and often extended family) was on weekends and on holidays. The sam applied to all my friends except for some of the ones that had a SAHM. I am not saying it never happens, but it isn’t something I cherish at all (nor do I feel mandatory in our lives)

Most families in most countries eat at least one meal of the day together unless schedules don’t permit. Food preparation and consumption has always been largely communal. This is not some American thing except as regards the modern view of trying to prioritize family dinner as a reaction to the latchkey TV dinners and snack dinners of the 80s. Look at any movie from any time period of any country. If it shows dinner the family is nearly always eating together. Often breakfast too. Heck kids used to go home for lunch with family.

The only cultures I can think of that wouldn't eat together are maybe upper class people in any society that make their kids eat with the nanny, because the kids eat early and the adults like to eat late dinners.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op this seems like a perfect job for a SAHM whose kids are older. Ask on neighborhood FB group. I’d love a job like this.

Why do you think this?

[Anonymous]

Past in the Ukrainian ladies DC Facebook group, there are lots of women looking for cleaning and cooking jobs. Most are able to work either on the books or cash

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op this seems like a perfect job for a SAHM whose kids are older. Ask on neighborhood FB group. I’d love a job like this.

IME most SAHM’s of older kids REALLY don’t need the money and and have no interest in working. If they needed the money, they wouldn’t be SAH with older kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op this seems like a perfect job for a SAHM whose kids are older. Ask on neighborhood FB group. I’d love a job like this.

IME most SAHM’s of older kids REALLY don’t need the money and and have no interest in working. If they needed the money, they wouldn’t be SAH with older kids.

I agree (I am a SAHM with older kids that asked earlier what the going rate would be.)

And because someone like this doesn't really need the money, they'll be more likely to quit if something else comes up. For example, if my high school kid's sport event starts at 5 and I want to go watch my kid play--there's no way I'm going to miss it so that I can be cooking and cleaning someone else's house for pin money.
If there's a teacher work day we may want to use that to drive a few hours and do a college tour and I'm not ok with not being able to do that because I need to work a few hours in the afternoon.
The reason I do SAH is because I want to be free and available to do things like the above.

If the employer was ok with the "SAHM with older kids" taking time off for that type of thing frequently(even 2-3 times per week during a sport season), then maybe it could work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op this seems like a perfect job for a SAHM whose kids are older. Ask on neighborhood FB group. I’d love a job like this.

IME most SAHM’s of older kids REALLY don’t need the money and and have no interest in working. If they needed the money, they wouldn’t be SAH with older kids.

As someone who has hired people in this type of role for years, I agree. This is NOT something SAHM do. The demographic I see is typically a woman who is retirement age (and mostly single ones) who are living in a townhouse on their SS. And want some extra cash for travel, etc. They have had some sort of white collar job, but not the type of job that they were bringing in 6 figures. They are not looking for backbreaking work, but will keep your kitchen generally clean and do a little laundry. They tend to enjoy cooking and do that too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op this seems like a perfect job for a SAHM whose kids are older. Ask on neighborhood FB group. I’d love a job like this.

IME most SAHM’s of older kids REALLY don’t need the money and and have no interest in working. If they needed the money, they wouldn’t be SAH with older kids.

I agree (I am a SAHM with older kids that asked earlier what the going rate would be.)

And because someone like this doesn't really need the money, they'll be more likely to quit if something else comes up. For example, if my high school kid's sport event starts at 5 and I want to go watch my kid play--there's no way I'm going to miss it so that I can be cooking and cleaning someone else's house for pin money.
If there's a teacher work day we may want to use that to drive a few hours and do a college tour and I'm not ok with not being able to do that because I need to work a few hours in the afternoon.
The reason I do SAH is because I want to be free and available to do things like the above.

If the employer was ok with the "SAHM with older kids" taking time off for that type of thing frequently(even 2-3 times per week during a sport season), then maybe it could work.

I agree that it could work as long as the employer is incredibly flexible. And it seems like this is the type of job that should be incredibly flexible, as none of these tasks are particularly urgent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Between work and kids I’m drowning at home and would like to hire someone 20 hours a week to cook meals and clean/keep the house tidy.

Any suggestions where I can look or post for this kind of role? I haven’t had luck with care..com since the pandemic for other roles.

Is your spouse doing anything to participate in the household management and childcare????

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go on care and search for folks under elder care. You will find a number of retired women who want to earn a little money (at least this is true in my southern state). They aren’t going to scrub toilets. They will do what they might do for an elderly person — keep t her kitchen generally clean, cook a little and maybe a little laundry. I have someone like this three days a week from 2-7. She is also supervising my special needs kid — that is very profound and similar to elder care sitting.

I am going to completely disagree with this. I have not had good experiences with people who do elder care. They are looking for a caretaking position, which this is not. I have had better luck with people with a history of restaurant experience and/or housekeeping.

I have actually had good luck with print ads in the newspaper in the past. That was 5 years ago though.
My suggestion is to post wherever Merry Maids or whatever would post an ad for a job. Emphasize flexibility and guaranteed pay (if you are offering them).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op this seems like a perfect job for a SAHM whose kids are older. Ask on neighborhood FB group. I’d love a job like this.

IME most SAHM’s of older kids REALLY don’t need the money and and have no interest in working. If they needed the money, they wouldn’t be SAH with older kids.

That’s because you are thinking of SAHM’s in your UMC neighborhood.
This is a real job for someone who needs the money and is looking for work during school hours.

I think one thing you can offer, OP, is 4 days a week with some flexibility on specific days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You could ask someone who has kids going to school but wants to keep their nanny. So they pay the nanny for school pickup and evenings, but you pay the nanny for daytime cleaning and meal prep. This might take some care to find - people who nanny don't always want to clean and cook - but it could be a nice pairing for the right nanny.

This is how I found my housekeeper. My neighbor's nanny was looking for more hours during the school day but wanted it to be close by so she comes to my house twice a week to do laundry, dishes, change sheets, etc. I still have a biweekly house cleaning service for the deep clean.

The only downside is that her background and experience is more of a nanny so I wouldn't say her cleaning skills are as good as other housekeepers I've had. I really have to spell out what needs to be done but other than that shes great.