School advising kids to "try again next year" regarding college applications

[Anonymous]

There are always schools that take everyone if you don't get into the colleges you applied to. Sounds fake or bad advice.

[Anonymous]

A thread like this pops up every year and every year all of the big name privates do fine in admissions. Some kids may not end up exactly where they or their parents would prefer, but that's been the case for decades now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I think colleges should review dcum postings and reject anyone whose parents have ever used the term “big 3” in case it’s hereditary.

I think DCUM should ban insecure people who think they are funny but are just painful.

This is the private school board. Everyone on here understands that "Big 3" is shorthand for a few schools and is much easier than writing out the names of the potential schools. Btw, I'm a NP (should we ban those shortcuts as well?).

Everyone understands that some parents at these schools simply cannot resist typing “our Big 3,” even when that info is completely irrelevant to the topic at hand.

My suggestion would be a separate forum with little virtual gates to protect the communities from the unwashed masses.

[Anonymous]

Last year at our Big 3 (which we define as GDS, Sidwell and fill in any blank not going to fight about it) our kid didn't go to their dream school. Or second or third-best dream school. Just isn't happening on a regular. His friend group same thing. Very few get to the "great schools" but end up In full almost transparency we are from one of the first two mentioned. Part of this is why I come back to this section of DCUM. For us, one main reason for paying was to ensure a great education that landed them in a great school. We did all the things and they got great grades. They were in activities and all of it. They were also one in many who felt the disappointment. Yes, they are all happy in their nice schools. But don't join these schools because you want to go to top schools. Go because you can afford it. Because your kid has special needs that can't be addressed well in public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Last year at our Big 3 (which we define as GDS, Sidwell and fill in any blank not going to fight about it) our kid didn't go to their dream school. Or second or third-best dream school. Just isn't happening on a regular. His friend group same thing. Very few get to the "great schools" but end up In full almost transparency we are from one of the first two mentioned. Part of this is why I come back to this section of DCUM. For us, one main reason for paying was to ensure a great education that landed them in a great school. We did all the things and they got great grades. They were in activities and all of it. They were also one in many who felt the disappointment. Yes, they are all happy in their nice schools. But don't join these schools because you want to go to top schools. Go because you can afford it. Because your kid has special needs that can't be addressed well in public.

PP: Truly a question out of curiosity only: How good were those great grades? Top 10% grades? Top 25%? Top 50%?

We're paying, too, at one of these schools, and although I wish that doing well would bring some sort of return come college application time, I've interviewed enough kids for my HYP to know that the competition is unbelievably fierce and that what might have been true 25 years ago in terms of realistic expectations isn't anymore.

[Anonymous]

Between top 10 & 15%. I reread my message- send in between a phone call apologies. One of his friends who didn't get into any Ivy was a legacy and top 5% of the class. These kids all have outstanding grades, personalities and leadership roles in clubs, newspapers, and debates. I can't get too granular but there were many disappointed kids last year. Again all fine schools but all safety schools. Assuming it will be like this again this year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First of all "Big 3" does not guarantee admission anywhere.

Publics always do better in this area.

Parents need to do their jobs and have their kids target safeties as well.

Nah 40 percent of our big 3 went to top 25 colleges or top 20 liberal arts schools. The remainder went to top 30 liberal arts or top 40 university with the exception of one or two. Public can’t come close to that.

Does no one realize this is a dumb metric considering public covers a much wider range and percentile of abilities, socioeconomics, and even desire to attend college immediately following high school? Further public schools in this area could have a senior class 3x the size of a private school senior class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First of all "Big 3" does not guarantee admission anywhere.

Publics always do better in this area.

Parents need to do their jobs and have their kids target safeties as well.

Nah 40 percent of our big 3 went to top 25 colleges or top 20 liberal arts schools. The remainder went to top 30 liberal arts or top 40 university with the exception of one or two. Public can’t come close to that.

Does no one realize this is a dumb metric considering public covers a much wider range and percentile of abilities, socioeconomics, and even desire to attend college immediately following high school? Further public schools in this area could have a senior class 3x the size of a private school senior class.

If you can’t compare raw numbers or percentages then how can you possibly arrive at the conclusion that public schools always do better than privates?

[Anonymous]

what was true even 2 years ago isn't true anymore!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Between top 10 & 15%. I reread my message- send in between a phone call apologies. One of his friends who didn't get into any Ivy was a legacy and top 5% of the class. These kids all have outstanding grades, personalities and leadership roles in clubs, newspapers, and debates. I can't get too granular but there were many disappointed kids last year. Again all fine schools but all safety schools. Assuming it will be like this again this year.

What "big 3" tells kids class rank (or percentile)? I think a lot of parents think their kids are "top 10%" because they have strong grades, but don't realize there are kids who take much harder classes with the same or better grades. At our private, I have no idea where my kid "ranks" because they don't rank. Even if they did rank purely by GPA, it's meaningless. GPAs are unweighted. So one kid's 3.9 who has taken easier classes (i.e., not the hardest math track, no double language, not the hardest science classes, etc.) is very different than the kid with a 3.9 who took hardest math track (up to Multivariable or beyond), hardest science classes offered (Physics C, etc.), double language, etc.

Another issue is that too many kids are applying to the same schools. Let me guess...kids are disappointed b/c they thought Northeastern was a safety, applied EA, and got deferred?? Doesn't everyone know by now that's not a safety because the school plays so many games. I think students should refuse to apply to schools EA...EA, for many schools is just a way to game the system. Get apps up to look more selective where really admits are coming from EDI, EDII and a few EA/RDs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I heard from my kid that results are so bad this year at our (Big3) school that the college counseling office is now telling kids
to either take a gap year OR matriculate at a lower tier school and "try again next year".

Have you heard this? It is worrisome or typical advice?

That’s sad.

Transfer students never fit in

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I heard from my kid that results are so bad this year at our (Big3) school that the college counseling office is now telling kids
to either take a gap year OR matriculate at a lower tier school and "try again next year".

Have you heard this? It is worrisome or typical advice?

If I spent 200k on a high school and that was the outcome, I'd want a refund

This too. It’s like they aren’t reading the tea leaves well. Maybe more AP scores and stem would make them less a mismatch with most of the colleges. And actually taking the SAT and ACT.

Mismatch curriculum and transcripts with many colleges desires.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First of all "Big 3" does not guarantee admission anywhere.

Publics always do better in this area.

Parents need to do their jobs and have their kids target safeties as well.

OP here.
These are kids who applied only to schools 50-125 and are not getting in. They thought they had safeties.

That’s bad.
Did previous alums who went to the same schools do poorly? Transfer? Drop out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that advising kids to matriculate to one of the schools that accepted them is hardly alarming advice, and that, if they are opposed to that then advising them that their other options are to take a gap year or go to a school that accepted them and try to transfer in a year is just speaking truth.

What else would you want them to say to a kid who chose their matches and safeties badly and is now upset at their options? Is there some other option missing?

OP.
The problem (as I hear it) is that what can be considered a safety has shifted. What was a safety even last year is no longer a safety.
The kids in the lower 50% of the class are getting shut out or close to shut out.

I heard the above from Texas but with the opposite outcome. Because they stayed open for full school throughout it Covid and had highly educated parents sub as needed for contact tracing numbers, they did very well with their APs, ECs, and classes the last four years and outperformed for college acceptances versus previous years. These are districts that have tons of test in magnet schools and speciality high schools (engineering, culinary, premed, etc tracks).

Did y’all’s kids write about Covid shutdowns in their essays? That may have been more of a disadvantage than you realize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh no, it's getting hard for even rich people to buy their way into selective colleges. Oh no.

It's not about being rich, it's about not being the correct skin color. Yeah diversity!