I am in tears--

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You have more respect for decisions of a child than their adult parents?

I agree, stay in your lane. You don't get to name other people's children. Their parents do. Your lane is teaching math, reading, science, etc., unless their is suspected abuse requiring referral.

You are pretty dense. The teacher is NOT naming the child. The CHILD is asking to be called this name. All the teacher is doing is calling the student by the nickname they've asked to be called. Teachers shouldn't have to call the parent every time some kid would rather be called "Ace" than "Harold," or "Jazzy" instead of "Jacqueline."

According to the law they do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I think many of you are not clear on what Youngkins policy requires. According to the best coverage I have seen it restricts the ability of parents to have the school use a different name or gender. That is if a supportive family wants Jane to be called Jack with he pronouns under this policy the family has to show legal documents changing name and gender. This is being dressed up as being about parental rights but is really only about the rights of one type of parent. Also for those who think schools should put kids who want to use different pronouns at school do you also think schools should out gay kids to their parents?

It sounds like this is what Youngkin wants teachers to do. This should not be part of a teacher's job.

Yes. It should not be part of a teacher's job. The teacher should teach the subject they were hired to teach. Issues of sexuality should be handled by the parents/family. Teachers can easily and compassionately decline to be involved and maintain a professional relationship with the students. This policy requires teachers to do so. But they don't want to--they want to ride in on a white horse and save the day.

Because issues of sexuality just get left at the door and don't come into play during school? I suggest you read a little about Maslow's hierarchy of needs and get back to us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Guys. Teachers. Hear my voice. There is a teacher shortage. Do you really think you're going to get fired for calling Danielle Danny because that's what she wants to be called? lol! Stop getting distracted by this stuff and teach.

Hopefully they do fire the ones breaking the law. They shouldn’t be teaching anyways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You have more respect for decisions of a child than their adult parents?

I agree, stay in your lane. You don't get to name other people's children. Their parents do. Your lane is teaching math, reading, science, etc., unless their is suspected abuse requiring referral.

You are pretty dense. The teacher is NOT naming the child. The CHILD is asking to be called this name. All the teacher is doing is calling the student by the nickname they've asked to be called. Teachers shouldn't have to call the parent every time some kid would rather be called "Ace" than "Harold," or "Jazzy" instead of "Jacqueline."

According to the law they do.

The law that random people make up and can change at a moments notice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are not a parent and have no authority to make such a decision on behalf of a child. Teach the subject you were hired to teach. You are not a therapist. You are not the child's friend. Stay in your lane.

THIS.

Use the kid’s last name, it’s not your job to parent.

I'm sorry, what? "Smith, sit down please. Garcia did you have a question?" Are you joking? GTFOH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What concerns me most about this post is the concept of a teacher who cannot clearly communicate what they are talking about even on a totally anonymous forum.

Oh, you thought it was a real teacher and a real situation?
It was so poorly articulated and written, I didn't believe them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Parents are in the best position to work with their children and, where
appropriate, their children’s health care providers to determine (a) what names,
nicknames, and/or pronouns, if any, shall be used for their child by teachers and
school staff while their child is at school, (b) whether their child engages in any
counseling or social transition at school that encourages a gender that differs from
their child’s sex, or (c) whether their child expresses a gender that differs with their
child’s sex while at school."

lol!!! I love how they think parents can control what their child does and expresses at school.

Also - this is policy. Not law. Teachers, carry on and do your jobs and use whatever name the kid wants. I would love to see a school district try to fire you because you called a kid Hendrix instead of Henrietta when there is a teacher shortage. You may get a stern talking to and a letter for your file, but who cares. If your skin is not a foot thick at this point, you are in the wrong profession.

Never heard of FERPA?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG these comments are so disappointing.

I can see why people are put off by the all caps, but this is a teacher expressing a desire to give trans students some dignity.

I know, right? The heartlessness on display here is horrifying. The very reason a trans kid would ask their teacher to call them by a different name is that the child *fears their anti-trans parents*. Teachers can show basic decency, and afford their students dignity, by addressing them as they would like to be addressed. But no, let’s throw these poor kids under the bus to empower bigoted parents.

This is the exact problem. In your mind the parents are monsters.

Teachers can encourage this ideology and walk away with no consequences.

The parents who love and know the child far more and far better than any teacher are left to deal with the aftermath of this "support".

You really think teenagers who are prone to fads (tide pods for breakfast, anyone?) and are working with not-fully-developed brains are capable of making these life changing decisions and that you know better than their parents?

Just stop. You are making things worse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG these comments are so disappointing.

I can see why people are put off by the all caps, but this is a teacher expressing a desire to give trans students some dignity.

I know, right? The heartlessness on display here is horrifying. The very reason a trans kid would ask their teacher to call them by a different name is that the child *fears their anti-trans parents*. Teachers can show basic decency, and afford their students dignity, by addressing them as they would like to be addressed. But no, let’s throw these poor kids under the bus to empower bigoted parents.

This is the exact problem. In your mind the parents are monsters.

Teachers can encourage this ideology and walk away with no consequences.

The parents who love and know the child far more and far better than any teacher are left to deal with the aftermath of this "support".

You really think teenagers who are prone to fads (tide pods for breakfast, anyone?) and are working with not-fully-developed brains are capable of making these life changing decisions and that you know better than their parents?

Just stop. You are making things worse.

What aftermath? Seriously? What do you think the dire consequences of saying “they” instead of “she” are going to be?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guys. Teachers. Hear my voice. There is a teacher shortage. Do you really think you're going to get fired for calling Danielle Danny because that's what she wants to be called? lol! Stop getting distracted by this stuff and teach.

Hopefully they do fire the ones breaking the law. They shouldn’t be teaching anyways.

Ahhhhh. The Republican base with their 2rd grade, black and white understanding of law and social issues. Some things never change. :-P

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG these comments are so disappointing.

I can see why people are put off by the all caps, but this is a teacher expressing a desire to give trans students some dignity.

I know, right? The heartlessness on display here is horrifying. The very reason a trans kid would ask their teacher to call them by a different name is that the child *fears their anti-trans parents*. Teachers can show basic decency, and afford their students dignity, by addressing them as they would like to be addressed. But no, let’s throw these poor kids under the bus to empower bigoted parents.

This is the exact problem. In your mind the parents are monsters.

Teachers can encourage this ideology and walk away with no consequences.

The parents who love and know the child far more and far better than any teacher are left to deal with the aftermath of this "support".

You really think teenagers who are prone to fads (tide pods for breakfast, anyone?) and are working with not-fully-developed brains are capable of making these life changing decisions and that you know better than their parents?

Just stop. You are making things worse.

What aftermath? Seriously? What do you think the dire consequences of saying “they” instead of “she” are going to be?

A double mastectomy at age 17.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Parents are in the best position to work with their children and, where
appropriate, their children’s health care providers to determine (a) what names,
nicknames, and/or pronouns, if any, shall be used for their child by teachers and
school staff while their child is at school, (b) whether their child engages in any
counseling or social transition at school that encourages a gender that differs from
their child’s sex, or (c) whether their child expresses a gender that differs with their
child’s sex while at school."

lol!!! I love how they think parents can control what their child does and expresses at school.

Also - this is policy. Not law. Teachers, carry on and do your jobs and use whatever name the kid wants. I would love to see a school district try to fire you because you called a kid Hendrix instead of Henrietta when there is a teacher shortage. You may get a stern talking to and a letter for your file, but who cares. If your skin is not a foot thick at this point, you are in the wrong profession.

Never heard of FERPA?

FERPA gives parents certain rights with respect to their children's education records. What does calling Elizabeth Billy have to do the child's education record? The record is still going to say Henrietta not Hendrix. What is your point?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I think many of you are not clear on what Youngkins policy requires. According to the best coverage I have seen it restricts the ability of parents to have the school use a different name or gender. That is if a supportive family wants Jane to be called Jack with he pronouns under this policy the family has to show legal documents changing name and gender. This is being dressed up as being about parental rights but is really only about the rights of one type of parent. Also for those who think schools should put kids who want to use different pronouns at school do you also think schools should out gay kids to their parents?

It sounds like this is what Youngkin wants teachers to do. This should not be part of a teacher's job.

Yes. It should not be part of a teacher's job. The teacher should teach the subject they were hired to teach. Issues of sexuality should be handled by the parents/family. Teachers can easily and compassionately decline to be involved and maintain a professional relationship with the students. This policy requires teachers to do so. But they don't want to--they want to ride in on a white horse and save the day.

I teach high school. I have 3 students this year who asked me explicitly on the first day of school to call them completely different names.

Susie — “I go by Kate.”
Josephine — “I will be writing JJ on my papers, you can call me JJ or Joe”
Larla — “Please call me Eli, I use he/him pronouns.”

I’m not teaching sexuality. I’m referring to the kid by what they asked me to call them. That is basic human decency and respect. Just like when I ask to be called “Mrs. Smith”, if someone calls me “teacher S” I’d have every right to correct them, these kids have every right to correct me. It’s just a name. I’m not tattooing it on them forever, I’m not forcing them to use specific bathrooms or take hormones or date one sex. I’m just calling them what they asked to be called.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have more respect for decisions of a child than their adult parents?

I agree, stay in your lane. You don't get to name other people's children. Their parents do. Your lane is teaching math, reading, science, etc., unless their is suspected abuse requiring referral.

I’m guessing you’re okay with calling someone Nicholas if their name is Nick ?

Why would this be hard? If you are a teacher this should be a non-issue. Just call them the name provided on the roster.

What if the kid prefers Joe to joseph? Or nora to eleanor? Nn are not new

The student profile allows for the parent to enter the given name and then a "prefers to be called" name. Again, not hard. But the teacher doesn't get to decide and keep the nickname from the parent. And why should a teacher have nicknames for kids anyway. Is it impossible to develop rapport with a child without using a nickname?

Well, yes. If a child says his name is one thing and the teacher refuses to call him by that name, there will be no rapport between the child and teacher. And if the cause is transphobia the relationship between teacher and student will be terrible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG these comments are so disappointing.

I can see why people are put off by the all caps, but this is a teacher expressing a desire to give trans students some dignity.

I know, right? The heartlessness on display here is horrifying. The very reason a trans kid would ask their teacher to call them by a different name is that the child *fears their anti-trans parents*. Teachers can show basic decency, and afford their students dignity, by addressing them as they would like to be addressed. But no, let’s throw these poor kids under the bus to empower bigoted parents.

This is the exact problem. In your mind the parents are monsters.

Teachers can encourage this ideology and walk away with no consequences.

The parents who love and know the child far more and far better than any teacher are left to deal with the aftermath of this "support".

You really think teenagers who are prone to fads (tide pods for breakfast, anyone?) and are working with not-fully-developed brains are capable of making these life changing decisions and that you know better than their parents?

Just stop. You are making things worse.

Asking to be called Sam instead of Sarah is no more life changing than shaving your head or dressing goth. If you like it and it sticks, it becomes part of you. If it’s just a side effect of an undeveloped brain following trends, you can go back to how it was.