Do kids not write thank you notes/emails anymore?

[Anonymous]

My ten y.o daughter writes them and she’s responsible for giving them to her friends at school. Who knows if they eventually make it to their homes, but at least I know she writes them. It’s our job to teach our kids to appreciate our friends and family.

[Anonymous]

My kids write hand written snail mail thank you notes for every gift they get. I wrote on their behalf until they could do it on their own. It takes five minutes. If people take the time to buy them a gift it’s the least they can do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only have young kids but I had to take this off of my very overwhelming to do list. We appreciate gifts and the people who give them. I send a text with a photo of my kid using the gift when I can, the rest I just let it go. Apologies in advance to anyone who is offended. I can't do it all.

This. I would gladly even take gift giving off the table to save me the headache of having people offended. We don't mean to offend. If your intention in giving the gift is to be thanked, you can probably abstain.

What if we thank you in person when we receive the gift? Is that not good enough?

People have always been busy. It’s common courtesy to send a thank you note once you’ve had a chance to open the gift. Thanking someone for something when it’s wrapped and you don’t know what it is doesn’t count.

My mom always had my sister and me write thank you notes. I do the same thing with my daughter. In my view, it’s important to take the time to show gratitude.

No, people have NOT been busy like they are now. Not anywhere close.
And we no longer use mail. At all. Thank you notes are definitely a relic of a bygone era that only older people utilize.

And if me thanking you to your face and telling you how nice it is to give a gift "doesn't count" then you are too high maintenance to know.

You're too common for me to know and thank God, I don't know you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most probably don't have stamps and stationary. An email or text is fine.

All grocery stores sell postage stamps and it's stationEry. Stationary is not moving or not meant to move.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only have young kids but I had to take this off of my very overwhelming to do list. We appreciate gifts and the people who give them. I send a text with a photo of my kid using the gift when I can, the rest I just let it go. Apologies in advance to anyone who is offended. I can't do it all.

This. I would gladly even take gift giving off the table to save me the headache of having people offended. We don't mean to offend. If your intention in giving the gift is to be thanked, you can probably abstain.

What if we thank you in person when we receive the gift? Is that not good enough?

Wow. Someone has zero manners. Yes, if you thank in person when opening it, no thank you note is needed. Otherwise, yes, send a. Thank you note.

Curious, where are you from? I’m guessing someplace like NJ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the past couple of years I have no received thank yous for graduation gifts or weddings.

Me either. I've gone back to writing out checks so I know they were received.

[Anonymous]

If you were there when they received the gift no they don’t and shouldn’t write a note.

No college student is emailing or calling, but they should text you.

[Anonymous]

I was pleasantly surprised to receive 2 handwritten notes from 2 boys I sent checks / cards to upon graduation.

I think acknowledgement is just thoughtful. It doesn't have to be a card. I'm not a stickler. But I hate sending a gift and not knowing if it even arrived! I mean, people steal packages, I have wrong addresses etc.

Then I want to follow up to make sure it arrived but it looks like I'm fishing for a thank you note. Sigh.

[Anonymous]

I don't. But I thank the person via text and send them a pic of the item being used.

[Anonymous]

If someone mails a gift, we call them mostly to let them know it arrived and DS says thank you. I’m not going to make him write cards.

But in person like a birthday party or Christmas? No. You hand him the gift, he says thank you, you know it was received, the end.

[Anonymous]

This has been my pet peeves for a while. My kids are still little but we've been to soo many parties where we gave a gift with our name on it (just to point out that they know who it was from) and never received any sort of acknowledgement. Blame this one on the parents, if these parents are the same way then it probably never even occurs to the kids. I always make my kids write thank you notes after , call me old fashioned but manners never go out of style.

[Anonymous]

Teaching children to write thank you notes will serve them well in life. I once applied for a job that I really wanted but didn't get. I still wrote a thank you letter to interviewer thanking him for considering me for job and even though someone else was chosen, it had been a pleasure meeting him and I wished the new employee congratulations.

A little over a year later I received a phone call from interviewer asking if I was still interested. I was and stayed there ten years. He told me that he had been impressed by my thank you letter. "Good manners open doors that the best education cannot."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have my kids do thank yous for bday party gifts as young elementary schoolers anymore. I did it with my oldest for the first couple of years when he had whole class bday parties in preschool and es. printed them out on the computer with a pic of him with the gift as he opened them at home and had him sign them then sent them into school. Then realized not a ton of people do it and happily removed it from my list, especially as we moved on from whole class parties and I needed to track down addresses. I’m aware it’s not perfect etiquette and I’m ok with it. We always thank people for coming and bringing a gift as they leave. We still do thank yous for relatives and people who send things from out of town so they know a gift was received and enjoyed.

And we don't open gifts during parties anymore - the cards and gifts get separated half of the time before the gifts are even opened. I couldn't write thank you notes for many of the gifts if I tried.

Why not? So many seem to dislike children and take away fun things from them. It's so strange.

Because it's not fun for the kids watching, and it's not always fun for the birthday kid who may prefer to run around with their friends.

It's not strange that people have different ideas about fun.

Another reason is there's no pressure to open, play with, and share the gift right then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have my kids do thank yous for bday party gifts as young elementary schoolers anymore. I did it with my oldest for the first couple of years when he had whole class bday parties in preschool and es. printed them out on the computer with a pic of him with the gift as he opened them at home and had him sign them then sent them into school. Then realized not a ton of people do it and happily removed it from my list, especially as we moved on from whole class parties and I needed to track down addresses. I’m aware it’s not perfect etiquette and I’m ok with it. We always thank people for coming and bringing a gift as they leave. We still do thank yous for relatives and people who send things from out of town so they know a gift was received and enjoyed.

And we don't open gifts during parties anymore - the cards and gifts get separated half of the time before the gifts are even opened. I couldn't write thank you notes for many of the gifts if I tried.

Why not? So many seem to dislike children and take away fun things from them. It's so strange.

Because it's not fun for the kids watching, and it's not always fun for the birthday kid who may prefer to run around with their friends.

It's not strange that people have different ideas about fun.

Weird. It always seem a fun activity, and kids like seeing the birthday kid open their gift.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have my kids do thank yous for bday party gifts as young elementary schoolers anymore. I did it with my oldest for the first couple of years when he had whole class bday parties in preschool and es. printed them out on the computer with a pic of him with the gift as he opened them at home and had him sign them then sent them into school. Then realized not a ton of people do it and happily removed it from my list, especially as we moved on from whole class parties and I needed to track down addresses. I’m aware it’s not perfect etiquette and I’m ok with it. We always thank people for coming and bringing a gift as they leave. We still do thank yous for relatives and people who send things from out of town so they know a gift was received and enjoyed.

And we don't open gifts during parties anymore - the cards and gifts get separated half of the time before the gifts are even opened. I couldn't write thank you notes for many of the gifts if I tried.

Why not? So many seem to dislike children and take away fun things from them. It's so strange.

Because it's not fun for the kids watching, and it's not always fun for the birthday kid who may prefer to run around with their friends.

It's not strange that people have different ideas about fun.

Weird. It always seem a fun activity, and kids like seeing the birthday kid open their gift.

No, definitely don't make kids sit around watching another kid open gifts. What a waste of time. I'm so glad this isn't part of parties anymore. I wish we could remove it from adult baby showers and the like too. Ugh, it's also tacky to show off what everyone else bought, and it's awkward for the gifter and the getter to know what to say.

My child writes thank you notes to grandparents and great grand parents for holiday and birthday gifts. We do not write them to other children for party gifts. Mostly out of logistics - I don't have the names and addresses of all of the little kids in his class, and also because I just don't think it matters that much.

I personally do not write thank you gifts but that's because I don't receive gifts really except from my parents and I open it in front of them and express my gratitude right away. I will also usually call the first time I use a gift and tell them about it ("I'm using that new pan you got me to make cookies, just wanted to let you know!")

I do, however, agree that thank you notes should always be sent for wedding gifts.