Driving 3 to 7… how are you handling it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You are all impressive, devoted parents.

I don't work, so I'm free to drive my kids about, but there's no way I'm spending the afternoon in the car every day. There is a limit to the number of activities they pack in, just for everyone's sanity, and the planet (even in an electric car, that's a whole lot of pollution).

Um....how old are your kids? This is exactly what I thought when my kids were in elementary school. Now that they are in HS, parenting has a different set of expectations. And my kids do the bare minimum and take a bus to and from school.

PP you replied to. Kids are 12 and 17. 17 year old has special needs and is not ready to drive. One takes the bus, I drive the other. "Parenting has a different set of expectations"? Yes, one *I* set! I'm not playing the activities game. Thankfully, we're all on the same page.

It’s really sad that your kids can’t even tell you what school activities they’d like to be in because they know that you (their non-working parent) would not be willing to drive them there. I don’t know what SN your one child has but there is now way that a NT teen has no desire to do any activities of any kind with kids their age. I feel really sorry for them. You are doing them a great disservice and it’s sad that your spouse is going along with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You are all impressive, devoted parents.

I don't work, so I'm free to drive my kids about, but there's no way I'm spending the afternoon in the car every day. There is a limit to the number of activities they pack in, just for everyone's sanity, and the planet (even in an electric car, that's a whole lot of pollution).

Um....how old are your kids? This is exactly what I thought when my kids were in elementary school. Now that they are in HS, parenting has a different set of expectations. And my kids do the bare minimum and take a bus to and from school.

Same. I thought it too and then came high school. Would you tell them they can’t join the high school sports team? Practices have been at random times all of August, during the workday or evening. Preseason practice was in June and July. No, he can’t bike there with all of the equipment and it’s far. It will be easier once school starts and we only have to pick up since practice is after school.

It complicates things because I still have a child in elementary who plays rec sports. This means 1-2 practices in the evening and a game. That’s not over scheduled but it can seem like a lot of driving to drop off at the field or gym, go to the HS to pick up, go back to the field of gym to pick up. I can’t put the younger one in an Uber yet. We really try to carpool and all of us are counting the days until my oldest can drive.

I'm sure your son could probably bike to practice. They make specialized sports backpacks for transporting equipment (rackets, sticks, shoes, outfits, etc.) via bicycle. If you are talking about football pads or something, then you can store those inside your school. Contact the athletic director for a sports locker. What is too far? My kids biked to practices that were anywhere from 2 miles to 7 miles. Just consider it extra conditioning.

The football players have to be there at 6am in the summer. They are not biking miles in the dark. I guess we could load the bike, unload it and have him bike home after intensively working out for several hours but no thanks. I’ll pay for Uber if we can’t get him. He doesn’t need extra conditioning and I’m not complaining.

Why not? My son had flashing lights for his headlight and taillight on the bike. How far away is the school from your house? If you are not complaining about driving him, then go for it. But if you need another option, there is one easily within reach.

The vast majority of roads in the country, and the DMV, are not safe for bicyclists. I wouldn’t let my kid bike many routes.

- bike commuter

Out here in the Fair Lakes 'burbs where we live, it is pretty safe for bicyclists. My kids can bike to their school (Chantilly HS), bike to swimming at Cub Run, bike to soccer at Sully/Arrowhead/Greenbriar, bike to the gym, etc. They always wear a helmet and always use flashers at night. They know to watch out for turning cars even when they have the right of way. I believe in allowing them this freedom to develop their transportation skills and independence. We are talking 14 and 15-year-olds here... not 10-year-olds.

Congrats? That doesn’t change the fact that some routes have no bike-safe options. I let my eight year old bike to the park with a friend, so it’s not a helicopter thing. It depends on the route.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You are all impressive, devoted parents.

I don't work, so I'm free to drive my kids about, but there's no way I'm spending the afternoon in the car every day. There is a limit to the number of activities they pack in, just for everyone's sanity, and the planet (even in an electric car, that's a whole lot of pollution).

Um....how old are your kids? This is exactly what I thought when my kids were in elementary school. Now that they are in HS, parenting has a different set of expectations. And my kids do the bare minimum and take a bus to and from school.

Same. I thought it too and then came high school. Would you tell them they can’t join the high school sports team? Practices have been at random times all of August, during the workday or evening. Preseason practice was in June and July. No, he can’t bike there with all of the equipment and it’s far. It will be easier once school starts and we only have to pick up since practice is after school.

It complicates things because I still have a child in elementary who plays rec sports. This means 1-2 practices in the evening and a game. That’s not over scheduled but it can seem like a lot of driving to drop off at the field or gym, go to the HS to pick up, go back to the field of gym to pick up. I can’t put the younger one in an Uber yet. We really try to carpool and all of us are counting the days until my oldest can drive.

I'm sure your son could probably bike to practice. They make specialized sports backpacks for transporting equipment (rackets, sticks, shoes, outfits, etc.) via bicycle. If you are talking about football pads or something, then you can store those inside your school. Contact the athletic director for a sports locker. What is too far? My kids biked to practices that were anywhere from 2 miles to 7 miles. Just consider it extra conditioning.

The football players have to be there at 6am in the summer. They are not biking miles in the dark. I guess we could load the bike, unload it and have him bike home after intensively working out for several hours but no thanks. I’ll pay for Uber if we can’t get him. He doesn’t need extra conditioning and I’m not complaining.

Why not? My son had flashing lights for his headlight and taillight on the bike. How far away is the school from your house? If you are not complaining about driving him, then go for it. But if you need another option, there is one easily within reach.

The vast majority of roads in the country, and the DMV, are not safe for bicyclists. I wouldn’t let my kid bike many routes.

- bike commuter

Out here in the Fair Lakes 'burbs where we live, it is pretty safe for bicyclists. My kids can bike to their school (Chantilly HS), bike to swimming at Cub Run, bike to soccer at Sully/Arrowhead/Greenbriar, bike to the gym, etc. They always wear a helmet and always use flashers at night. They know to watch out for turning cars even when they have the right of way. I believe in allowing them this freedom to develop their transportation skills and independence. We are talking 14 and 15-year-olds here... not 10-year-olds.

Congrats? That doesn’t change the fact that some routes have no bike-safe options. I let my eight year old bike to the park with a friend, so it’s not a helicopter thing. It depends on the route.

I just think that I am more comfortable letting my 15 year old (who is way different than an 8-year-old) bike on busy streets than most parents. I would encourage other parents to look at and notice ways that their older kids can commute by bike. Many busy streets have sidewalks alongside -- Route 50, Fairfax County Parkway, Stringfellow Rd, Lee Highway and others all have pedestrian sidewalks available in my area. With the new construction, even Interstate 66 will now have a bike/walk path running alongside it. Keep in mind that kids still need lessons in how to cross safely at busy intersections, especially at night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At 16 my kids were driving. They got their learners out of state at 14. By 16, they had two full years of driving experience. We bought them each a car. We paid for insurance. In exchange, they were expected to help out with the transportation of younger siblings when possible. And they drove themselves to activities. I would focus on getting that kid driving.

14? Yeah, here in Maryland, you can't get a license until you are 16.5 years old. But, thanks for playing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You are all impressive, devoted parents.

I don't work, so I'm free to drive my kids about, but there's no way I'm spending the afternoon in the car every day. There is a limit to the number of activities they pack in, just for everyone's sanity, and the planet (even in an electric car, that's a whole lot of pollution).

Um....how old are your kids? This is exactly what I thought when my kids were in elementary school. Now that they are in HS, parenting has a different set of expectations. And my kids do the bare minimum and take a bus to and from school.

Same. I thought it too and then came high school. Would you tell them they can’t join the high school sports team? Practices have been at random times all of August, during the workday or evening. Preseason practice was in June and July. No, he can’t bike there with all of the equipment and it’s far. It will be easier once school starts and we only have to pick up since practice is after school.

It complicates things because I still have a child in elementary who plays rec sports. This means 1-2 practices in the evening and a game. That’s not over scheduled but it can seem like a lot of driving to drop off at the field or gym, go to the HS to pick up, go back to the field of gym to pick up. I can’t put the younger one in an Uber yet. We really try to carpool and all of us are counting the days until my oldest can drive.

I'm sure your son could probably bike to practice. They make specialized sports backpacks for transporting equipment (rackets, sticks, shoes, outfits, etc.) via bicycle. If you are talking about football pads or something, then you can store those inside your school. Contact the athletic director for a sports locker. What is too far? My kids biked to practices that were anywhere from 2 miles to 7 miles. Just consider it extra conditioning.

The football players have to be there at 6am in the summer. They are not biking miles in the dark. I guess we could load the bike, unload it and have him bike home after intensively working out for several hours but no thanks. I’ll pay for Uber if we can’t get him. He doesn’t need extra conditioning and I’m not complaining.

Why not? My son had flashing lights for his headlight and taillight on the bike. How far away is the school from your house? If you are not complaining about driving him, then go for it. But if you need another option, there is one easily within reach.

The vast majority of roads in the country, and the DMV, are not safe for bicyclists. I wouldn’t let my kid bike many routes.

- bike commuter

Out here in the Fair Lakes 'burbs where we live, it is pretty safe for bicyclists. My kids can bike to their school (Chantilly HS), bike to swimming at Cub Run, bike to soccer at Sully/Arrowhead/Greenbriar, bike to the gym, etc. They always wear a helmet and always use flashers at night. They know to watch out for turning cars even when they have the right of way. I believe in allowing them this freedom to develop their transportation skills and independence. We are talking 14 and 15-year-olds here... not 10-year-olds.

Another dense comment. Your comment is irrelevant. Perhaps if this was a Fair Lakes board, your comment would be useful. I understand what many PP’s are saying, as I also live in a region that is not friendly to pedestrians or bicyclists and there is no public transport, and things are very spread out. We are outside of DMV. People regularly die from being hit by vehicles. I would say this happens once a month, at least.

So driving it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You are all impressive, devoted parents.

I don't work, so I'm free to drive my kids about, but there's no way I'm spending the afternoon in the car every day. There is a limit to the number of activities they pack in, just for everyone's sanity, and the planet (even in an electric car, that's a whole lot of pollution).

Um....how old are your kids? This is exactly what I thought when my kids were in elementary school. Now that they are in HS, parenting has a different set of expectations. And my kids do the bare minimum and take a bus to and from school.

Same. I thought it too and then came high school. Would you tell them they can’t join the high school sports team? Practices have been at random times all of August, during the workday or evening. Preseason practice was in June and July. No, he can’t bike there with all of the equipment and it’s far. It will be easier once school starts and we only have to pick up since practice is after school.

It complicates things because I still have a child in elementary who plays rec sports. This means 1-2 practices in the evening and a game. That’s not over scheduled but it can seem like a lot of driving to drop off at the field or gym, go to the HS to pick up, go back to the field of gym to pick up. I can’t put the younger one in an Uber yet. We really try to carpool and all of us are counting the days until my oldest can drive.

I'm sure your son could probably bike to practice. They make specialized sports backpacks for transporting equipment (rackets, sticks, shoes, outfits, etc.) via bicycle. If you are talking about football pads or something, then you can store those inside your school. Contact the athletic director for a sports locker. What is too far? My kids biked to practices that were anywhere from 2 miles to 7 miles. Just consider it extra conditioning.

The football players have to be there at 6am in the summer. They are not biking miles in the dark. I guess we could load the bike, unload it and have him bike home after intensively working out for several hours but no thanks. I’ll pay for Uber if we can’t get him. He doesn’t need extra conditioning and I’m not complaining.

Why not? My son had flashing lights for his headlight and taillight on the bike. How far away is the school from your house? If you are not complaining about driving him, then go for it. But if you need another option, there is one easily within reach.

The vast majority of roads in the country, and the DMV, are not safe for bicyclists. I wouldn’t let my kid bike many routes.

- bike commuter

Out here in the Fair Lakes 'burbs where we live, it is pretty safe for bicyclists. My kids can bike to their school (Chantilly HS), bike to swimming at Cub Run, bike to soccer at Sully/Arrowhead/Greenbriar, bike to the gym, etc. They always wear a helmet and always use flashers at night. They know to watch out for turning cars even when they have the right of way. I believe in allowing them this freedom to develop their transportation skills and independence. We are talking 14 and 15-year-olds here... not 10-year-olds.

Another dense comment. Your comment is irrelevant. Perhaps if this was a Fair Lakes board, your comment would be useful. I understand what many PP’s are saying, as I also live in a region that is not friendly to pedestrians or bicyclists and there is no public transport, and things are very spread out. We are outside of DMV. People regularly die from being hit by vehicles. I would say this happens once a month, at least.

So driving it is.

I was just using my area as an example. Oten people do not realize the possiities in their towns. What area do you live in? If people are interested in analyzing biking routes, I am happy to use Google Maps to offer suggestions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You are all impressive, devoted parents.

I don't work, so I'm free to drive my kids about, but there's no way I'm spending the afternoon in the car every day. There is a limit to the number of activities they pack in, just for everyone's sanity, and the planet (even in an electric car, that's a whole lot of pollution).

Do your kids do any sports or activites? If not, that is just lazy on your part. Don't give pollution as an excuse for your laziness.

np there is nothing wrong with not being busy every night of the week. Kids need time to just think and use their imaginations!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At 16 my kids were driving. They got their learners out of state at 14. By 16, they had two full years of driving experience. We bought them each a car. We paid for insurance. In exchange, they were expected to help out with the transportation of younger siblings when possible. And they drove themselves to activities. I would focus on getting that kid driving.

14? Yeah, here in Maryland, you can't get a license until you are 16.5 years old. But, thanks for playing.

I wouldn't want to be on the road with a 14 year old! YIKES. Where can you learn how to drive at 14? I think 16 is too young/immature.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You are all impressive, devoted parents.

I don't work, so I'm free to drive my kids about, but there's no way I'm spending the afternoon in the car every day. There is a limit to the number of activities they pack in, just for everyone's sanity, and the planet (even in an electric car, that's a whole lot of pollution).

Um....how old are your kids? This is exactly what I thought when my kids were in elementary school. Now that they are in HS, parenting has a different set of expectations. And my kids do the bare minimum and take a bus to and from school.

PP you replied to. Kids are 12 and 17. 17 year old has special needs and is not ready to drive. One takes the bus, I drive the other. "Parenting has a different set of expectations"? Yes, one *I* set! I'm not playing the activities game. Thankfully, we're all on the same page.

It’s really sad that your kids can’t even tell you what school activities they’d like to be in because they know that you (their non-working parent) would not be willing to drive them there. I don’t know what SN your one child has but there is now way that a NT teen has no desire to do any activities of any kind with kids their age. I feel really sorry for them. You are doing them a great disservice and it’s sad that your spouse is going along with it.

dp I think you can save your sadness for real important issues like the kids in Ukraine!