Realistically keeping teens away from drugs, smoking and alcohol?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A happy, functional, socially involved, financially secure family life.

Parents in good and functional marriage with no addiction, abuse or adultery

Kids in rigorous academic programs with EC and service commitments. Kids with outside enrichment and academic support..

Be present for your kids and be clued in about their day to day life.

Keep an eye on the company they keep.

Keep them off social media.

Keep an eye on your kids - their physical and mental health, their spendings. Their digital footprint etc.

I didn't have any of this (well social media didn't exist then) and didn't touch anything stronger than a Dr. Pepper.

But I did hang out with the good kids who didn't party, so I agree on the company they keep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sports, OP. Sports.

This is insane to me that people think this.

Folks, the high school sports crowd are the partiers. Wake up!

Yes!! Play hard, party harder, anyone? The jocks make substance abuse a badge of honor. Definitely for alcohol anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Statistically what is most likely to keep your teenager from destructive behavior?

My twins are 11 and will be in Jr. High next year. I know that everything can start at this age and I want to prepare my kids.

I’m not a scare tactic type parent. I want to arm them with facts and tools. I know I experimented with drugs, alcohol and sex in HS but things are so different now. I’m worried.

Not sure about statistics but being involved in sports year round has helped. My kids are very serious about their fitness and performance, which includes staying away from alcohol, vaping, and drugs.

Oh please that is absurd.

Sports teams parties in HS with less alcohol and drugs you live under a rock.

[Anonymous]

OP there is no magic bullet.

The best parents the best kids can fall victim to drugs and or alcohol.

There are lots of good parenting tips to help prevent this but in reality, you can not be with them every second of every day

We raised six and this is what we did.

1. Educate, educate from sex, drugs and rock and roll educate.
2. Bible-thumping never ever works
3. Confidence is key. Raise your kids to be independent to think for themselves. Peer pressure is huge. And there is not guarantee this works.
4. Sleepovers are never a good thing. I know it's a right of passage blah blah blah .
5. Parties must know whose house and who is driving.
6. Find any alcohol and or drugs even unopened in a car no car again til they buy one themselves.
7. Listen to your child respect your child
8. Part time job if they are not sports kids during the HS years. And for all of them summer jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I disagree. Kids from financially secure families (not obscenly rich kids) do not have the poverty related stressors and life circumstances that exposes them to the seedier side of life. If you are poor and living in a poor neighborhood, you are exposed more to the dealers and you have more of a need to have money for essential things like food, clothing etc.

True. Just ask Avon Barksdale and Stringer Bell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sports, OP. Sports.

Kids in sports can be the biggest partiers. The better physical shape you are in the more beers you can put away. 🍻

[Anonymous]

Overscheduling is never the answer. That will just cause burnout and possible resentment. I do think kids/teens need to learn to entertain themselves without getting into or causing trouble and relying heavily on screens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sports, OP. Sports.

High school athletes do stupid stuff all the time. They're not immune.

+1

I thought Sports would be the key too, unfortunately, not in high school. Lots of the athletes smoke weed. That's how my son started doing it. The ones who don't do it are heavy into drinking. Soccer/Football are his sports.

What I have learned is to keep communication open and honest with your teens.

I mean the Lax team at our HS is the source of the biggest parties, I can't believe we're an outlier on that front.

PP here. My son and his group of friends all play sports and don't really participate in the school parties. I've learned that some are into weed/chill and others are all over the place, drinking, partying and smoking.

Even if your kid is serious about his sport, it doesn't mean they not interested in experimenting...

[Anonymous]

I honestly think there are so many variables and a lot is luck.

I come from a family of 4 siblings, so does DH. DH and a sibling both had significant problems with drugs and alcohol in HS and college. Two of his siblings didn’t. Me and one siblings didn’t do/try anything risky in HS, two of my siblings did.

We all went to HYP, so all busy, good academics, high achievers, etc. DH’s parent very laissez fair, my parents super involved. DH UMC, my family MC.

I am going to do my best and pray our kids make good decisions. So far one has done well - minimal drinking and only tried edibles once. No idea how the others will do.

[Anonymous]

Just have to say even if you can avoid it until college, it will happen there. I can’t believe how pervasive vaping and weed are, as well as much harder drugs now that mine are in college. You just have to raise them to be confident and firm in their beliefs and I think able to communicate openly with their parents. Nothing should be off limits to discuss.

[Anonymous]

I pay my kids well for clean drug tests. Seems to be working so far.

[Anonymous]

There’s no recipe really.
I come from a family where neither parent ever drank or smoked. I did sports on high school. I didn’t have a sip of alcohol until I was 18.
However when I started college I also quit sports, started drinking, and later smoking. I was a nerd before and now I wanted to be cool, and to be cool I “had” to smoke and drink.
The only thing my parents were successful at was scaring me to death about hard drugs so I never tried. I wasn’t into weed either because it was illegal.
It’s do what you can and hope for the best really

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's all about the friends, access, and freedoms. Which way does the friend group peer pressure sway?

This.

It doesn’t matter how secure and happy your family life is. If kids hang with friends who have lots of access & freedoms, your kid will get sucked in.

[Anonymous]

There is so much advertising from alcohol companies in the sports world, some of that trickles down and influences high school sports too. Plus there is definitely peer pressure on those teams.


My siblings and I stayed mostly away from alcohol etc as kids. My dad was a teetotaler who often talked about the dangers. We were also not popular, so didn’t go to many parties. One brother did play some high school sports and he is the only one that experimented, but now is teetotaler as grownup. Just another data point.

[Anonymous]

Family life, emotional well being and friend groups.