Explaining racism and sexism to 3.5 year old?
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Anonymous
| So when does the 3 year old learn about feminism and queer theory? How about teaching them kindness and fairness to all? |
Anonymous
Lol not at all what was being said here. You and your obnoxious virtue signaling are such a turn off to well intentioned people. Not extreme enough for you, so call them racist. Amazing. |
Anonymous
+3. Only possible to sidestep, ignore, or put off for later if you’re white - which should say something about the need for white parents to find ways to talk about these issues. |
Anonymous
+4. I get that some people are turned off by ‘virtue signaling’ but please consider taking time on this because it’s exactly the sidestepping, avoiding and silence on these issues that allow kids to form beliefs and attitudes that perpetuate sexism and racism. They internalize based on their and their peers rationale and without an adult interjecting with some supportive age appropriate guidance, these beliefs grow deeper with age, starting from age 2 based on recent research. |
Anonymous
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I don’t understand why this is a big deal. “Some people think that boys and girls [or whatever groups] can’t do the same things. I disagree. I think boys and girls can both be X.” I use this formula to explain concepts like this. It’s very simple and doesn’t try to over explain. For race, I avoid labels like white or black for my preschooler because he doesn’t know what that means. I say “people with darker skin” or whatever.
“Some people say… Other people think…” is also how I explain things to my middle schooler. |
Anonymous
| +1 for Our Skin a first conversation about race. My 3yo has been choosing it as a bedtime book every few nights for the past couple weeks. It feels awkward to me to talk that directly about racism at this age but it has great language and it’s giving me some practice talking about difficult topics. When my daughter first picked up the book, she only read as far as the melanin explanation and then was clearly satisfied that she had gotten what she wanted to know from the book. I was happy to follow her lead and only answer the questions she had at that point. Six months later she started picking it up again and wanted to read to the end. It gives a good little parable of dealing with racism and unkindness by calling it out when something is not fair and the kids coming together with a trusted adult to learn how to treat everyone with kindness and stand up for one another. It gives kids a social script for any kind of bullying or injustice. |
Anonymous
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White patent of a slightly older kid here. I agree you need to address it. I think people saying “no, wait” must live in very white communities. My kid became interested in race at age 3 right before starting preschool at a school that was 90% black. You bet I had to talk to her about it.
Having said that, I’ve also learned that once you start talking about it, you are not going to put a nice “diversity and inclusion” ribbon on it and put it to bed. It’s an ongoing conversation and it gets harder, not easier. Buckle up. My kid has asked me the following questions in last couple years: - Are all my black friends’ moms nannies for white kids? - Why do black people smoke on the street all the time? (we live in a neighborhood where a group of black men smoke pot on a specific block most days) - Is it okay if I don’t like all black people? These books make it seem like I need to like all black people. And so on. Some of these Qs technically have easy answers, but that doesn’t mean she gets it when I explain. The thing you have to remember over and over is that little kids have extremely narrow frames of reference. They cannot conceptualize stuff like slavery, civil rights, institutional racism. They kind of can, but in these simplistic ways based on their much more limited experience with race. Also, yes, the POC in their classes are talking about race at home too. But that doesn’t mean they are getting a message about diversity and inclusion! They may instead be talking about having pride and love for their own race. Which you understand as an adult, but will make your kid say stuff like “My friends say black power sometimes. Why can’t I say white power?” Again, the answer here is technically easy (Nazis, white supremacy, slavery, etc.) but is hard for a kid, even at 6 or 7, to wrap their head around. So yes, by all means, get the books and have the conversations. But it never ends. Prepare yourself for that. |
Anonymous
Very Valuable insight here, thank you for posting this |
Anonymous
| You don't need a book. Just say, some people think that people who look different than them or have a different gender are less capable but that's not true. Give some examples of different people you know who do different things. |
Anonymous
They used to teach black children away from white children. Those children were told they couldn't be astronauts. They used to teach girls that they'd grow up to be mommies, wives, maybe teachers or nurses. They were told they weren't smart enough to be astronauts. Doesn't that seem silly to you? Aren't you glad we've learned more? |
Anonymous
This! Excellent script PP! |
Anonymous
| We better teach to kids, now the right are burning books, burning history. They think talking about slavery is hating on white people. It's a remembrance because racism is still an issue in this country. Just like terrorism with those crazy shooters. Talk to children, make them aware of the things outside and online. Don't trust priests just because religion says they are good, you could have a pedo at your church and you don't know it until it's too late |
Anonymous
| Ohh we can't talk about slavery because it hurts the white pride...BS. iIts HISTORY, live with it. Even my white husband believes there's racism and preference on white people in gov jobs. We gotta admit what we did, tall about the failures from the past so we don't repeat it again. Before women, everyone were more quiet about their bodies, religion seemed to protect people but did the opposite. The church murdered thousands of indigenous children and buried them under the catholic schools. The Vatican never apologized. Canada did more tougher repercussions.. I'm glad more people are converting to agnostic or atheist. Religion is fake, full of pedos. They just move the pedo priest to another state or country |
Anonymous
| Don't leave your children with religious people |
Anonymous
| Sure, right after that you can explain the abortion debate and the bicameral legistlative structure to the child |