Small families with big houses

[Anonymous]

Wow, some of these stories! My family of 3 moved from badly-laid-out 1200 ft to perfectly-laid-out 2000 ft and it’s like living in Versailles. I just can’t imagine 2000 sq ft per person.

Well, different strokes etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

We moved from a 5,300 square foot house to a 9,000 square foot house for more room. It depends on what your hobbies and proclivities are when considering the amount of space needed for one's pleasure.

Very similar here - 4K to 9.5K sq. ft for a couple. We wanted a less crowded garage, separate rooms for individual offices, a large guest suite for visitors, and dedicated rooms for a a gym, golf simulator, music, and other interests.

This is shockingly wasteful. I hope your dreams are haunted by people who can't afford any place to live, much less a massive house for just two people.

If you'd like to house homeless people, feel free to invite them to live with you, but why criticize those who are able to live as they choose? Jealousy?

NP here: Overconsumption like that leaves one open to criticism. Even if that house is a LEED-certified energy-efficient marvel, the amount of materials and space used for a house of that size is indefensible. I’m not jealous of people in houses like that. I’m depressed that they think it’s fine, and that there are thousands (millions?) of people who feel the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You guys are all insane. We have about 2000 sqft - family of four and it has never felt too small. This summer we will be empty nesters and I wonder what we will do with all the extra space.

I'm not remotely insane. I am poster with a family of 4 in a 2500 sq ft house and it's being an empty nester that actually makes me feel even worse for not having room for my kids to visit with friends, and later, possibly, spouses. We are actively looking into a larger house even though the youngest leaves for college in 2023. There is literally nothing insane about it. We are social people who like to spend time with each other and have others over. We have lived in this house for 20 years and it's just too small. Sounds like you're happy to not have people in your house. It's not a lifestyle I share, but I'm not calling you names.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lucky them. We're a family of 4 in a 2500 square foot house and it is not enough room. My teenage daughter won't have her friends over and my college-age kids wants his girlfriend to visit but there's nowhere for her to stay. I wuold love to have 5 or more bedrooms, especially as kids age and have different needs.

why won’t she have friends over? I grew up in England and we all have small houses with no guest rooms, basements etc. I had friends over. We hung out in my room.

I grew up that way, too. But when all of your friends have extra space in their houses when they have you over, it's just not comfortable. Her generation just doesn't do that and she's embarrassed. I wish she didn't feel like that, but I do get it.

[Anonymous]

family of 6 in a 2800, about 700 of that is offices space (some flexes to kids craft space, but that's while we're not working). we have been looking at 7000+ and we would use every inch. some of them (because in big houses they use the space stupidly a lot of the time) we are left scratching our heads why the bedrooms are small - and why they won't put FIVE bedrooms on ONE floor! or why no supersize kids beds exist anymore. we have a pair that likes to be doubled up, but we would love for them to have more room.

noted we need 2 totally separate and private office spaces, and probably a MIL space, so really looking for fam of 7 plus 2 home offices, plus business space.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

We moved from a 5,300 square foot house to a 9,000 square foot house for more room. It depends on what your hobbies and proclivities are when considering the amount of space needed for one's pleasure.

Very similar here - 4K to 9.5K sq. ft for a couple. We wanted a less crowded garage, separate rooms for individual offices, a large guest suite for visitors, and dedicated rooms for a a gym, golf simulator, music, and other interests.

This is shockingly wasteful. I hope your dreams are haunted by people who can't afford any place to live, much less a massive house for just two people.

If you'd like to house homeless people, feel free to invite them to live with you, but why criticize those who are able to live as they choose? Jealousy?

NP here: Overconsumption like that leaves one open to criticism. Even if that house is a LEED-certified energy-efficient marvel, the amount of materials and space used for a house of that size is indefensible. I’m not jealous of people in houses like that. I’m depressed that they think it’s fine, and that there are thousands (millions?) of people who feel the same.

Meh, I assume she's paying significant property taxes on it, which makes it closer to a net social good than something really environmentally costly like commercial air travel. Certainly one individual having or not having a large house does nothing to change the unhoused population.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lucky them. We're a family of 4 in a 2500 square foot house and it is not enough room. My teenage daughter won't have her friends over and my college-age kids wants his girlfriend to visit but there's nowhere for her to stay. I wuold love to have 5 or more bedrooms, especially as kids age and have different needs.

why won’t she have friends over? I grew up in England and we all have small houses with no guest rooms, basements etc. I had friends over. We hung out in my room.

I grew up that way, too. But when all of your friends have extra space in their houses when they have you over, it's just not comfortable. Her generation just doesn't do that and she's embarrassed. I wish she didn't feel like that, but I do get it.

NP.

"Her generation." So it's a generational thing, is it? Does that apply to the whole generation, or just a segment of it?

[Anonymous]

We are two adults who both WFH plus one ES kid in 1400 sq ft with 1 bath. We have one entire room that is rarely used, though to be fair it will be when my kid has indoor play dates again.

I'd like a second bathroom and I guess a slightly larger kitchen, etc., but with the right layout, 1600 sq ft would be more than enough. I really think it comes down to what you're used to. Before this, we lived in a 900 sq ft apartment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

We moved from a 5,300 square foot house to a 9,000 square foot house for more room. It depends on what your hobbies and proclivities are when considering the amount of space needed for one's pleasure.

Very similar here - 4K to 9.5K sq. ft for a couple. We wanted a less crowded garage, separate rooms for individual offices, a large guest suite for visitors, and dedicated rooms for a a gym, golf simulator, music, and other interests.

This is shockingly wasteful. I hope your dreams are haunted by people who can't afford any place to live, much less a massive house for just two people.

DP. We are three people in 6,000+ sq ft. home. My dreams are not haunted by the fact that I bought a large house. We donate over $100,000 a year to one food insecurity charity as well as volunteer our time. What are you doing to help those less fortunate?

If that poster had the brains to snag someone who made serious money, she would be the first in line to have a similar house. As it is, she now must rely on the largesse of those like you to fund her non-profit non-anything job until she completes barista training.

[Anonymous]

We have 4,100 SF with 2 kids and we use every single space in the house. We need two offices on different levels because we both WFH almost exclusively. I can see why people with ILs living with them or a ton of kids need more space but for us, this is perfect. The layout IMO is as important as the sqf.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lucky them. We're a family of 4 in a 2500 square foot house and it is not enough room. My teenage daughter won't have her friends over and my college-age kids wants his girlfriend to visit but there's nowhere for her to stay. I wuold love to have 5 or more bedrooms, especially as kids age and have different needs.

why won’t she have friends over? I grew up in England and we all have small houses with no guest rooms, basements etc. I had friends over. We hung out in my room.

I grew up that way, too. But when all of your friends have extra space in their houses when they have you over, it's just not comfortable. Her generation just doesn't do that and she's embarrassed. I wish she didn't feel like that, but I do get it.

This is valid. Growing up, my house was open concept before that was a thing so we had this huge great room that was office, dining, and living room all in one. The kitchen was small - too small for a table, just a bar. No other living space. Even though my friend's houses were the same square footage, my house offered zero privacy except for my bedroom. So I don't think it's square footage so much as how the house is laid out.

FWIW, I didn't have any issues bringing friends home in college. By then, my parents had changed their habits somewhat and spent more time chatting in the kitchen or outside, after they renovated the deck. They had also built on one additional bedroom (for a grandparent, who then passed) and turned their old room into the guest room, which was large, with a loveseat and TV and it's own bathroom. Just adding that one bedroom was crucial for guests and made all the difference.

[Anonymous]

We have 2 kids in a 7200 square foot house and we use every bit of space. We regularly host out of town family overnight for a week at a time. We have a gym, an attic movie / playroom, and both parents have an office. It was amazing when the kids had virtual school. Everyone had their own space. We used to have a 2000 square foot house and it was miserable when guests came. We very much enjoy entertaining and the house is perfect. No regrets!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:we are a family of three-our child is 4 and living in a 6000+ sqf. I feel guilty all the time environmentally, the cost of heating etc. But we did furnish minimally and have family and friends staying over all the time. The problem was in the are we were looking it was either small or too large.

One of the most persistent misconceptions is that the heating cost of a house is driven by size. The level of insulation is a much bigger determinant. And no, all houses aren't basically the same, a well-insulated house can use one tenth of the energy of a poorly-insulated one. Even among similarly insulated houses, doubling the size doesn't double the heating bill, it might increase it by 25%. And your other utilities -- for hot water, cooking, laundry -- are driven by the number of people in the house, not the size.

[Anonymous]

Family of 3, 3500 sq ft house, 5 bedrooms. One of those bedrooms is my office, one is a playroom, and one is a guest room. So they all have a purpose, but the playroom gets the least use. I imagine that will turn into some kind of teen hangout space in the next year or two.

[Anonymous]

Family of 4 + live in nanny, 7br 9ba , 8000sf. We don't use one of the bedrooms which is for guests like parents and the basement living area is used mostly by the nanny.

We used all of the house it's just larger rooms for the most part