If you are upper middle class parent, tell me why you sent your kid(s) to private schools?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because my kid was getting lost in the public school. He was smart and doing fine, but his report card literally read like the teacher pulled a 'good kid report card template' off the Internet and sent it to us. There was no personal attention and he was on a road to mediocrity. Not being inspired or encouraged--just 'you're doing fine--next' kind of attitude.

Could not have said better than this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. $300K + HHI is not upper middle class. Not in the DMV, or virtually anywhere in the USA. $300K is top 9th percentile in MD, top 6th percentile in VA, and top 10th percentile in DC.

2. We make $430K and are sending our kid to private school because we don’t want her wasting time on Chromebook games and state tests. We want her in small classes with teachers who can differentiate instruction. We want her to get the full slate of subjects, rather than math and reading to the detriment of other subjects. We want her to have access to great art and music opportunities. In sum: We can afford to give her a better education, so we are.

$300k is very much barely upper middle class regardless of the percentiles and averages you throw into the conversation. Nationally, the average private school tuition is $7600. Median home price in US is $340k, DC is median is $644k ($1,000,000 for a single family home). So breaking down that $300k income with higher than average tuition and mortgage, $300k is indeed upper middle class.

[Anonymous]

You are not middle class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. $300K + HHI is not upper middle class. Not in the DMV, or virtually anywhere in the USA. $300K is top 9th percentile in MD, top 6th percentile in VA, and top 10th percentile in DC.

2. We make $430K and are sending our kid to private school because we don’t want her wasting time on Chromebook games and state tests. We want her in small classes with teachers who can differentiate instruction. We want her to get the full slate of subjects, rather than math and reading to the detriment of other subjects. We want her to have access to great art and music opportunities. In sum: We can afford to give her a better education, so we are.

$300k is very much barely upper middle class regardless of the percentiles and averages you throw into the conversation. Nationally, the average private school tuition is $7600. Median home price in US is $340k, DC is median is $644k ($1,000,000 for a single family home). So breaking down that $300k income with higher than average tuition and mortgage, $300k is indeed upper middle class.

No. $300K is not enough to send multiple kids to private school in this area. If you chose an inexpensive parochial, you could get away with K-8, but forget about high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We can afford the education, but it is also a huge financial commit. So want to hear those who are in the similar boat (300k+) and are not ultra rich. Thanks.

If you make $300k you cannot afford it. We make $400k and 1 kid. Live in modest house with modest car and modest lifestyle. We also only started in MS, rationalizing that it wasn’t worth it at the ES grades.

Public is good for a lot of people and we have a decent, but not excellent public option. Main issue is that DC is brilliant but needs more attention and support than public can provide in our case. If DC had the right cohort in public it maybe would have been different as well, but cohort dynamic were also a concern.

[Anonymous]

Thank god - it’s been at least a month since someone tried to rationalize $3-400k as middle class income and I was beginning to worry DCUM had lost its way.

Stay clueless, y’all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because I wanted my child to learn more then just read and write. I wanted her to learn to self advocate, think outside the box and encouraged to take risks. HHI 225 and we make many sacrifices for her to attend.

It is interesting that you think privates are better at teaching kids to self advocate. I am all for privates for people who can afford them and think they can be superior in many ways, but I have always thought that one of the downsides is that kids are a bit more coddled and so don't learn to self-advocate as much. After all, their parents are the customers, which is not true in private schools.

I do believe there is something about the private environment teaching the kids to advocate. Whether it’s entitlement or in my opinion just being used to having extra resources - it makes a difference. When I went to college as a woman and minority in STEM there were a ton of resources for me, but I did not use them. I’d never had extra help at my not great high school and I just thought I was supposed to do it all on my own. I thought using the resources was a sign that I was doing poorly. The kids that came from private schools did not think twice about asking for help if needed. They weren’t ‘scared’ of the professors. They made use of the resources. It was like they were not trying to prove (like I was) that they belonged there - they knew they did. You can tell I’ve had some time to think about this.

+1

Thank you for putting into words, something that I've had difficulty expressing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did it to get my kids a great education and help with college admissions. Big mistake on the latter.

Can you elaborate on the college admissions but? Do you regret going private? I figure college is a craps shoot since it’s so competitive coming from
This area. What school are your kids at?

Kids went to a highly regarded private in DC. We were shocked at how broken the college admissions process is. It's not just a crapshoot, it's geared for certain groups to get in and leaves academically high achieving non minority middle class kids out. Kids in the top ten of their class ending up at schools that used to be for B- students. The college counselors no longer have connections with top colleges. The caliber of the high school doesn't matter anymore for college admissions. In fact it can actually hurt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh, and I get it. 300K is a lot of money in most places, and it is a lot of money here. But 50K tuition hurts for HHI of 300K. It's not impossible, but it hurts.

What schools are 50k? Ours starts at 38 and goes up to max out at 46 in 12th.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did it to get my kids a great education and help with college admissions. Big mistake on the latter.

Can you elaborate on the college admissions but? Do you regret going private? I figure college is a craps shoot since it’s so competitive coming from
This area. What school are your kids at?

Kids went to a highly regarded private in DC. We were shocked at how broken the college admissions process is. It's not just a crapshoot, it's geared for certain groups to get in and leaves academically high achieving non minority middle class kids out. Kids in the top ten of their class ending up at schools that used to be for B- students. The college counselors no longer have connections with top colleges. The caliber of the high school doesn't matter anymore for college admissions. In fact it can actually hurt.

This is one of my very real fears. Are you in a position to share the name of the school, or is it all of them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh, and I get it. 300K is a lot of money in most places, and it is a lot of money here. But 50K tuition hurts for HHI of 300K. It's not impossible, but it hurts.

What schools are 50k? Ours starts at 38 and goes up to max out at 46 in 12th.

All the big names are >$50k

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh, and I get it. 300K is a lot of money in most places, and it is a lot of money here. But 50K tuition hurts for HHI of 300K. It's not impossible, but it hurts.

What schools are 50k? Ours starts at 38 and goes up to max out at 46 in 12th.

All the big names are >$50k

False. Sidwell tops out at $48. GDS tops out at $46. NCS is just about $50. Holton is $48. I could go on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thank god - it’s been at least a month since someone tried to rationalize $3-400k as middle class income and I was beginning to worry DCUM had lost its way.

Stay clueless, y’all.

It’s certainly UMC lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did it to get my kids a great education and help with college admissions. Big mistake on the latter.

Can you elaborate on the college admissions but? Do you regret going private? I figure college is a craps shoot since it’s so competitive coming from
This area. What school are your kids at?

Kids went to a highly regarded private in DC. We were shocked at how broken the college admissions process is. It's not just a crapshoot, it's geared for certain groups to get in and leaves academically high achieving non minority middle class kids out. Kids in the top ten of their class ending up at schools that used to be for B- students. The college counselors no longer have connections with top colleges. The caliber of the high school doesn't matter anymore for college admissions. In fact it can actually hurt.

I can believe this. I love private for elementary and middle. We might peel away before HS. I also am dubious of the "highly regarded" ones. Maybe a solid, less regarded one that treats all kids more equally?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We can afford the education, but it is also a huge financial commit. So want to hear those who are in the similar boat (300k+) and are not ultra rich. Thanks.

If you make $300k you cannot afford it. We make $400k and 1 kid. Live in modest house with modest car and modest lifestyle. We also only started in MS, rationalizing that it wasn’t worth it at the ES grades.

Public is good for a lot of people and we have a decent, but not excellent public option. Main issue is that DC is brilliant but needs more attention and support than public can provide in our case. If DC had the right cohort in public it maybe would have been different as well, but cohort dynamic were also a concern.

I can’t see why it’s challenging with your 400k income, one child, and modest everything. They may not be so modest as you think.