Do I Buy Expensive Home To Make My Wife Happy?

[Anonymous]

No, OP. Don't buy something more than you can afford unless your wife is paying for half.

Don't listen to the women here, either.

I bought the house my wife insisted we get, and paid about 30 percent more than I wanted. Once we had been there 6 months she decided she didn't like the house. Then the house needed an expensive repair. There was so much complaining from her, but I was never going to buy another home with her. She was a lousy partner. When we eventually got divorced, she got half the equity, although I'd made all the mortgage payments, and paid for the expensive repair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How big is the mortgage on 1.8m? That would make me extremely uncomfortable at 550K if it's over 1.5m mortgaged.

OP here. It will be about $16k/month. We were approved for up to $3.2m so we definitely have the money. We have a very large savings account and a large down payment. Our HHI will increase if my wife goes back to work once kids are in school.

Do not make any financial decision assuming your wife is going back to work.

[Anonymous]

Old but smart advice still rings true today -

Happy Wife = Happy Life. 🥰

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, OP. Don't buy something more than you can afford unless your wife is paying for half.

Don't listen to the women here, either.

I bought the house my wife insisted we get, and paid about 30 percent more than I wanted. Once we had been there 6 months she decided she didn't like the house. Then the house needed an expensive repair. There was so much complaining from her, but I was never going to buy another home with her. She was a lousy partner. When we eventually got divorced, she got half the equity, although I'd made all the mortgage payments, and paid for the expensive repair.

OP here. We can afford the house. My wife is not like this.

[Anonymous]

Yes. $300k isn’t that much more. $16k Serbs like a huge payment though. Put more down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. $300k isn’t that much more. $16k Serbs like a huge payment though. Put more down.

OP here. We will end up putting down a substantial down payment to lower the mortgage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How big is the mortgage on 1.8m? That would make me extremely uncomfortable at 550K if it's over 1.5m mortgaged.

OP here. It will be about $16k/month. We were approved for up to $3.2m so we definitely have the money. We have a very large savings account and a large down payment. Our HHI will increase if my wife goes back to work once kids are in school.

Do not make any financial decision assuming your wife is going back to work.

OP here. I just realized $16k was a typo. I meant to say $6k/month or around there. Mortgage will be $8-9k/month with 20% down payment but I will put a larger down payment to lower the mortgage to $5-6k/month.

The house will be bought based on my income. My wife may go back to work but that is not a factor in our budget. We may be able to pay off the mortgage earlier if my wife goes back to work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whole lot of “I” in your OP. Does your wife work? Does she get a say in household priorities for money and budgeting?

OP here. I say I but we are a team.

- She quit working when she had our first child. She wants to stay home with our kids while they’re young.

- She runs the household. We have a joint checking account and she can spend as she pleases. We run big purchases by each other, but she has full control. I handle most of the finances and bill paying and she handles ordering items for the household, paying for doctors costs, paying for kids outings, etc.

Ok so the savings you would be putting toward a down payment include your wife’s earnings. The income available is larger because you have no childcare expenses. You are not buying the house, you and your wife are. Make an offer on the house and apologize to your wife for belittling her contributions.

[Anonymous]

The only way to convince her to go cheaper is to find a cheaper house and explain how you can upgrade it tremendously and still save money. For example custom closets for $50k. Brand new appliances. A nice patio.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whole lot of “I” in your OP. Does your wife work? Does she get a say in household priorities for money and budgeting?

OP here. I say I but we are a team.

- She quit working when she had our first child. She wants to stay home with our kids while they’re young.

- She runs the household. We have a joint checking account and she can spend as she pleases. We run big purchases by each other, but she has full control. I handle most of the finances and bill paying and she handles ordering items for the household, paying for doctors costs, paying for kids outings, etc.

Ok so the savings you would be putting toward a down payment include your wife’s earnings. The income available is larger because you have no childcare expenses. You are not buying the house, you and your wife are. Make an offer on the house and apologize to your wife for belittling her contributions.

OP here.

- The savings does not include my wife’s earnings.

- I never once belittled her contributions.

- How do I not have childcare expenses? We have two kids. My wife doesn’t work and we live off my income.

-

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whole lot of “I” in your OP. Does your wife work? Does she get a say in household priorities for money and budgeting?

OP here. I say I but we are a team.

- She quit working when she had our first child. She wants to stay home with our kids while they’re young.

- She runs the household. We have a joint checking account and she can spend as she pleases. We run big purchases by each other, but she has full control. I handle most of the finances and bill paying and she handles ordering items for the household, paying for doctors costs, paying for kids outings, etc.

Ok so the savings you would be putting toward a down payment include your wife’s earnings. The income available is larger because you have no childcare expenses. You are not buying the house, you and your wife are. Make an offer on the house and apologize to your wife for belittling her contributions.

How does OP bro have childcare expenses when he has kids and his wife doesn’t work? You lack common sense.

[Anonymous]

If you can afford it, get it.

[Anonymous]

Generally, happy wife = happy life. But, no reason she can't find a mansion with 4 bedrooms instead of 5...

[Anonymous]

Two couples I know had marriages fail after getting the big house. Both involved affairs.

One of the couples— the wife now used the guest room as a space to bang her online conquests and AP.

[Anonymous]

I call troll. Same troll who always posts ask abby-esque subject lines With Every Word Capitalized